The Girl Wants to Be M*rdered

Chapter 38



The darkness of the forest arrives faster than expected. Especially in autumn, when the sun starts to rise lower and lower. After parting with Sia, I returned to the cabin that Elli built in the woods and began to explain the day’s events little by little. Elli listened carefully to each of my words—a true listener.

The slightly cramped but abundantly cozy home quickly filled with my youthful voice. I was amazed when I first saw the house being built. Wolves with black fur, deer, bears, crows, and even unknown feline predators appeared and built the house for me. Their skills in chopping wood and stacking stones were jaw-dropping.

As I watched them work, I petted a cat that had come up to my feet. In the empty clearing, a house stood before me, and I confirmed once again that Elli was extraordinary. She’s amazing, my sister.

“So, I made this with Sia for you, Elli unni!!”
“Thank you, Alice. Did you have fun today?”
“Yes!!”

I struggled to place the flower crown I brought onto her head with my little hands. Oops, mistake. Hehe, let me fix that. Well, one of my hands was just a clumsy chunk of meat anyway. It took me a while to get it right, but after many attempts, I finally succeeded.

“Wow!! Elli unni, you look like a princess!!”
“…..Is that so?”

Elli looked most beautiful when she smiled like this. Her face, receiving my gift and beaming with joy, twisted with mixed feelings—joy, regret, affection, and sorrow. Her wavering gaze focused keenly on my left arm. It looked like a wound that had been gnawed at by a beast, rough and not clean at all.

It was the trace of her biting into me. Chomp, deliciously.

“Hehe.”

Is she feeling sorry? Is she thinking apologetically? But sister, sin… You know, even if you’re thrown into prison, even if you suffer the same wounds, even if you pay for your crimes, even if you escape into death… You can never repay it. It’s impossible for something so superficial, isn’t it? Just like my wound, which will remain forever; turning away from it may be possible, but it will never disappear.

So, sister. Don’t live too caught up in my wounds. It’s just something that can’t be compensated for or swept under the rug. Just admit your mistake and promise never to do it again. That’s more than enough.

You can just brush it off as something that happened, right?

“Hehe! I wish I could always be with Elli unni like this.”
“….I think so too.”
“Really!?”

I climbed onto her lap while she sat in a chair, swinging my legs from side to side. The wooden chair creaked in harmony with my bouncing, and the sound mixed with the thud of logs popping in the fireplace, creating music in our little cabin.

Elli hugged me tightly. To make sure I didn’t fall off her lap, to keep me from getting down.
“I’ll protect you, Alice.”

Her words, filled with a firm promise, echoed in my ears. Hearing that, I smiled softly.

Elli unni, truly.

“Yes, I trust you, Elli unni.”

If I don’t trust her, who will I trust?

In the Syria Village, there stood an ancient cathedral. From there, small sobs, sighs, and voices filled with fear flowed continuously.
“Oh… oh…”
“The… holy relic!!”

In the center of the cathedral, a holy relic bestowed by the papacy existed. To be precise, it existed.
“How… can this happen?”
“F-Father!!”

By the law that at least one holy relic must exist in the cathedral, an old priest had taken a difficult journey to receive the ancient cross directly from the papacy. It had been carefully encased in glass so that no one could touch it. But now, it was crumbling white with spots.

The sacred cross was crumbling before their eyes, as if it had caught some disease. Many, with their hands clasped in prayer, watched the scene.

An incomprehensible phenomenon.
Is it a curse from God?
Is there someone who provoked God’s wrath?

The cathedral was filled with commotion. The place that held many people had suddenly transformed into a forum for debate.
“A witch…” one of them whispered.
At this, everyone fell silent.

Thud.
Like a drop of water landing on calm water, small ripples began to spread out.

The agreeing voices began to grow a little louder.
“That’s right…It must be a witch!!”
“Remember when it suddenly rained and… the ground froze!?”
“Yeah… That holy relic couldn’t just crumble on its own!!”

Frenzy is given by the gods. It colors the people, transcending customs and traditions. None of the ordinary people can resist the phenomenon caused by the gods. It was only a bit of bad luck. It was just a time when the ice age arrived, and unfortunately, the unusual weather unfolded.

Due to not eating well, the weak bodies began to get sick easily. A disease spread throughout the village, and the frost caused the tin not to fulfill its role and crumble away.

But the people couldn’t understand this.

They had someone to blame right before them, someone they could shift the responsibility onto.

With discontent piling up, having witnessed strange behavior recently and sightings of suspicious locations…

People’s suspicion and fear grew into a fire, slowly beginning to infect them with madness.

Just some bad luck.

Two months.
A long time, or short time, depending on your perspective.
Alice and I gradually continued our little meetings.

Thanks to that, our relationship improved more than anyone else’s, but conversely, the atmosphere in the village visibly darkened.
The villagers became jumpy and locked their doors even for simple outings, easily angered at small things.

There was no other choice—
“—Not today.”
“Y-Yes!? That can’t be..,”
“It’s worse. Even you, who doesn’t help at all, must’ve heard something?”

Drought, hail, poor harvests, famine, irregular climates.
And recently, even a flu-like illness started spreading.

Various disasters struck our village.
In fact, signs of this had not gone unnoticed before.
Unlike before, the noticeable drop of temperature was felt.

It slowly decreased production.
To prepare for that, the villagers had been storing grain for a while.

But as time passed, there was no sign of a solution.
And to make matters worse, just two days ago, on land sown with autumn wheat, it rained unexpectedly, despite it being winter.

If that had been the end, it would’ve been nice.
But afterward, even a cold wave came, causing the ground to freeze completely, creating an unprecedented situation.

Everything that had sprouted must have died.
And with the illness… I could understand their feelings.

Maybe until this year, they could hang in there…
But it seems the storage is now empty.
“Anyway, I have no more work to give you.”
“Ugh… Yes, I understand.”

Bang. The front door of the house slammed shut with an unnecessary loud sound.
Click, the sound of the door being locked followed, as if to say there wouldn’t be another chance. I hung my head low and exited the house with empty hands.

There was money in my pocket for a meal, but it was barely a drop in the bucket compared to the long winter ahead.
“Really… What a hassle…”

I trudged around the village weakly.
Although it couldn’t be called a bustling area, the neighborhood that once had a bit of vitality now looked like a cold ghost town.

From the small windows, I could see eyes filled with disgust.
They stared at me from every opening.

Eyes.
Eyes, eyes, eyes.
Eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes, eyes.

What’s going on?
“……”
What?
Gulp, the sound of tension swallowing my throat echoed.
Glares filled with hostility.
Sure, I could say it was the usual demeanor, but my instincts warned me of something.

Something is different.
It’s dangerous.
“…..Let’s check it out.”

The village’s scenery had changed drastically.
Feeling discord in all of it, I secretly observed the people wandering about the main road.
Groups of people were suspiciously gathered, whispering secret stories amongst them.

“—Gonna…—.”
“…—?—,”
“—!?”

What were they talking about?
Curiosity sparked, I edged closer to listen attentively.

But one of those gathered spotted me and quickly turned tail and ran.
Flee.
So fast, he disappeared from my sight in seconds.

…Huh?
“—She’s here!!”
Every one of them turned their gaze toward me, having seen the fleeing man.
Seeing that I approached, they scattered in a hurry.

Rustle.
Leaving me all alone.
Not long after, the alley where many had gathered was empty, with only me remaining.
It resembled a scene of exclusion.

And the target of that exclusion was clearly me.
“….What’s going on?”
Seriously, what’s happening?
I couldn’t hide my confusion, standing there for a while in the spot they had left.

As I looked around, I saw others on the street mumbling about me.
As if they had seen something scary.
As if they had encountered something dirty.

Everyone I passed by hurriedly avoided or ran away from me.
“What’s the matter…?”

Exclusion.
It wouldn’t be a lie to say it never happened before.
I mean, sure, being abandoned by my parents and begging for work to eat could be considered bullying.
Yet they had always treated me, however little, with some decency.

At least some degree of human dignity.
Doing work in return for a little money or food.
If it weren’t for that, I would have already starved to death.

But it had never been like this.
They ignored me at best, but never treated me like some heinous creature, openly avoiding or fearing me.
They had at least maintained some pride.

But I felt that was over today.
This place I’ve spent over a decade in feels unfamiliar now, much like seeing it for the first time.
The faces I’d passed by seem like total strangers.
The air of the village, which once felt familiar, now feels utterly unpleasant.

“Is it… dangerous?”

Given Alice’s situation with her arm, my head was already a mess, but now this?
—This hand… Hmm, I made a mistake. I received [punishment] from my sister and this happened.
—…..!!!!
—I’m a bad kid… Uh, but I’m happy because I’m forgiven! Oh, and this is a secret?

That little detail I heard about Alice’s arm.
I wanted desperately for it to be a lie or for me to have misunderstood, but…
Having tasted that brutal aftermath, I wanted to focus on fixing this…

“Ugh… This is driving me crazy.”

After a brief stroll, I decided to return to the barn I used as a sleeping space and home.
I would sleep a little, then think.
With a clear mind.
Unaware of what might happen next.
And so, I returned.



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