Side Note

"I'm going to fucking tear you from limb to limb, fucking bitch ass… I can't say the last word." Hello there, Madeleine here. I am still suspended in the air and being cursed at by what I presume is an angry sailor who has one of her arms stretched towards me. "What the fuck?! You couldn't have fucking forgotten me again?! That bitchy rabbit said you remember most people now! That fucktard!"

"Hey, I can at least say you're familiar!" I feel like her name is just at the tip of my tongue… I wish Mel was at the tip of my tongue… I mean, what?

"Are you getting fucking horny right now over your dead girlfriend?! Seriously?!" She angrily yelled out, like every other sentence I've heard from her… wait, what did she say? "Yeah, I said dead girlfriend! I did it myself, after all!"

"You did fucking WHAT?!?!" My body instinctively flared with killing intent, summoning a dagger to my hand. I tried throwing it, however, my body was as still as a rock due to the woman's ability. "You will regret bragging about it."

"Pfft… fuck you. You're held still, and unless you've got something that ain't even fucking physical, you can't do shit to me." Hmm… not physical, huh? I can't use magic since I have nowhere to tap my foot… I guess I'll try buying time before I eliminate her.

"So you killed Mel, huh?" Considering her current behaviour, she may brag about it. As soon as I asked that question, her angry demeanour turned smug in a sadistic way.

"Oh yeah. In fact, I killed her twice, thrice, quadrice. So many fucking times, thanks to that bitchy bunny." She let out a chuckle, looking like she was reminiscing. Okay, idea time. I can't use daggers or magic. I could pray for a lightning strike… no wait, we're in a pyramid. Maybe a brick of the pyramid will fall… that's stupid. So what do I have on me? Nothing, really, since I forgot to get all my things back into my dagger dimension. She's outside my dagger creation range… wait, why is this so hard compared to the others?

"Four times… how did you do that?" I better ask this since I'm curious and also… well, the answer is probably Myka.

"How the fuck did you end up with a reality warper for an antagonist? That's, like, so fucking unlucky. Seriously, how?" 

"Figure that out yourself."

"Fuck you, I will. Especially since the more time I waste, the better that fucking bitch treats me afterwards." Okay, she's thinking now… time for me to think as well. I could flood the floor with daggers… that would reach me before they reached her. I could use the dark halberd, but how can I move it? I don't have a way to move darkness… wait, I'm an idiot.

I materialised my dark halberd, making it float before my face. The Ring of Lurking Darkness lets me manipulate darkness with Umbrakinesis, why wouldn't it be able to move darkness? I'm such an idiot at times. Now, I'll just turn the halberd into a spear for maximum effectiveness, then send it flying at her. Look at it zoom… why did it stop? I looked back at the woman holding me up, noticing her other arm stretched outward towards the dark spear. 

"I fucking lied about that whole physical shit, bitch! Get fucking rolled!" Well… since both her arms are outstretched, I'll just split the dark spear in half and send the new spear at her. Her face suddenly turned into surprise as the half spear flew right at her, when all of a sudden, it stopped like its other half right before her face, causing the woman to send out a hearty laugh. "YOU FUCKING DUMBASS!!! Did you really think I needed my hands for this shi- ARGH!!! FUCK!!!"

Her concentration was suddenly broken when my dark spear extended into her right shoulder, and I felt myself falling towards the ground. I rolled upon landing and then sprinted towards her, who was trying to get the spear out of her shoulder. It was too late for her to react when my fist lodged itself right under her chin, sending her upwards on a beautiful arc. Damn, she had some airtime. 

Now then… she claimed to have killed Mel, but there's no way Myka would allow that, right? Should I kill her? Hmm… I probably should, but I won't. I don't kill, after all. What was my reasoning again? Killing is boring? Yeah, let's go with that. I'll just loot her body for the key to the next floor. She didn't have a lot, so I quickly found it, which was a photo of her and Rio Verdeux… huh. I didn't know Rio had friends. Good for her. I promptly went to the next floor.

Hello there, it's Mel again, currently two floors above the one where I thought a telekinetic (I swear I know a telekinetic… but who?). Huh? What was the previous floor like? So you remember that tiny elf's cabin? It was that, but with only the butler, and he was shaking while staring at a knife lodged into the dinner table. The key was the knife, by the way. According to the butler, that floor was supposed to be the teleporter, but she's dead, and apparently, Myka reached her limit for dead people she's allowed to bring.

This new floor is a whole desert, although I've been conveniently plopped in the middle of a bandit camp. It kind of reminds me of the bandit camp that me, Mel, and Speedy subjugated a while back. It even has an oasis like the previous one! Am I fighting the bandit chief? The entire bandit group? Or is it the wife of the bandit chief? I remember seeing her more than once. I wonder who.

Chapter namesake: Voodoo Child (Slight Return) by Jimi Hendrix