Dungeons Just Want to Have Fun

What was that? Suliel asked.

Your guess is as good as mine, Kelsey sent back. That’s pretty much how all my discussions with gods has gone. They show up, make demands, get pissy and leave.

A sense of smugness filtered down through the link.

I will admit though, Kelsey sent, that he went away a little more upset than usual.

You just talk to the gods? Routinely? Suliel asked.

Not often. Maybe a dozen times in the last fifty years, Kelsey replied.

That’s still a dozen more times than the kingdom has seen. Suliel sent. The gods only talk to their chosen clerics, and even then…

She paused, thinking it through. Only when there is a problem for them to address, she finally added. Was Kelsey a problem that the gods needed to address? She certainly seemed to want to be.

What are you doing, that he was so concerned about? Suliel asked.

Ah that, Kelsey replied. Don’t tell the gods this, but I don’t really know. I’m mostly operating on doing what they don’t want me to, with only the vaguest idea of what the end goal is.

You must have some idea, Suliel said. I can’t imagine you going to any kind of effort without a goal.

I know that it has to do with the hero’s path, Kelsey sent. Or perhaps, journey? I get the impression that there’s a place involved. At that place, at that time, Anton will be in a position to do… something.

Suliel thought about it. We don’t really speak of paths as having ends, she finally sent. No one lives forever, of course, but they just stop progressing on the path. It never ends.

I have reason to think that the hero’s path ends, Kelsey sent, along with a feeling of confidence. The other paths are decoys.

False paths? All of them?

Maybe not false. They’re worthwhile on their own terms, but the real prize is behind the hardest path.

Why would the gods not want us to get the real prize, whatever it is? Didn’t they set up the paths in the first place?

I don’t know, Kelsey sent, But I do know they’re holding you back.

Me?

You people. Mortals. I haven’t had a chance to read it, but your history is much too long. You should have made more progress, but you’re being held back.

Suliel thought back to what the god had said.

He said we were being nurtured, she sent. Are we being held back, from hurting ourselves?

There’s a case to be made that too much progress can be harmful, Kelsey admitted. But shouldn’t he be making it? Shouldn’t you be given a chance to decide for yourselves?

Like you gave us? Suliel sent sarcastically.

You’ve always had a choice, Kelsey said. It’s just always been a bad one. Do you turn down the gifts I’ve given and live in hunger and fear? Or do you accept the risk of the unknown?

Suliel didn’t have an answer to that. Her people needed what Kelsey had given them. She needed the power of guns to survive.

Kelsey let the pause extend, then sent another thought. Turn that choice around, look at it from my perspective. I could have held back, denied you the option of choosing. What kind of choice would that have been?

Suliel opened her eyes. Kelsey’s presence receded, and she looked at the worried faces of her advisors.

“Are you all right, my lady?” Syon asked.

“I’m fine,” Suliel said. “I just… learned some things.”

She thought back to what she had been doing. “Letters, right. I need to write letters to the King, to Lord Brankin, to—”

“You don’t need to make a list,” Arelon interrupted. “We can bring paper and ink to you once you’ve bathed and eaten, my lady.”

“I suppose they can wait that long,” Suliel allowed. “How are they to be delivered? We had more servants back home…”

“One of the servants can deliver them,” Arelon said. “We all know the area quite well, especially if your correspondents are in Hightown.”

“I want…” Suliel hesitated. “I want to make sure that they don’t get intercepted.”

Syon coughed. “We can have a guard or two escort the servant, my lady. They won’t know the area, but they can keep an eye out for trouble.”

“That’s good, but… I’m worried about my security here. Can one of you, or perhaps our Sargent, make an evaluation of how secure we are in this building.”

“Are you worried about anything in particular, my lady?” Syon asked.

“We had to deal with a Shadowblade not long ago, did we not?”

Arelon hissed in alarm. “Are you expecting further attacks from them?”

“No, not yet,” Suliel said thoughtfully. “He wasn’t targeted at me.”

“Even so, my lady,” Arelon said, “If you’re concerned about Shadowblades, I can only recommend hiring adventurers for protection. No disrespect is meant for your own soldiers, of course, but assassins specialise in getting past trained soldiers.”

Delir snorted and spoke up for the first time. “Unfortunately, the Shadowblade we ran into was a member of the adventures guild.”

“Even so,” Suliel said. “Can I prevail on you to investigate the guild and identify anyone whom we can trust enough to hire.”

“Of course, my lady,” Delir said. “Will first thing in the morning be soon enough?”

Suliel nodded. “I’ll give you a lift in the carriage. I need to meet with at least one Church leader, as do you, I think.”

“As you say, my lady,” Delir said, glancing at his leg. “It would be good to get this fixed.”

“Lastly, Arelon, I need to meet with some… traders? Craftsmen? I’m not sure exactly. Someone who buys glass and someone who buys cloth.

“I’ll make enquiries, my lady.”

“And…” Suliel paused. “The special trunk. Syon, can you make sure that is delivered to my room here?”

“I’ve already ordered it, my lady.”

“Then… I suppose I can have that bath, now.”

Suliel started writing letters after dinner. She started with the one to the king, informing him of her arrival and placing herself at his disposal. Another letter went to the Master of Ceremonies at the King’s Court. As a noble, she was entitled to attend court and mingle with the other nobles waiting on the King’s favour. It wouldn’t do to just show up though. Once informed of her presence, the Master of Ceremonies could issue an invitation to her.

It was an involved process, but it gave the court time to notify the guards and prepare any other welcome they thought necessary. Suliel might have chafed at the convoluted process, but right now she welcomed anything that put off her appearance at court.

To Lord Brankin, she wrote a cautiously worded note, asking about his health and the health of her mother. The prospect of Suliel presenting herself to her liege lord was carefully hinted at, suggesting that she was at her disposal, but leaving unstated the possibility that he might not want her in his mansion while her mother was staying there.

It took her three tries to write that one. Kelsey tried to help, but unstated subtlety was not her specialty.

The churches she planned to visit, and the adventurers guild didn’t need a letter. They would see her when she arrived, and Suliel thought her meetings there would go better without advance notice.

The final letter that Suliel wrote was to her contact in the Rose Circle. Uncle Riaden had given her the name, cautioning her not to allow anyone to connect it to the Rose Circle. Suliel still wasn’t sure if the Circle were traitors or devotees to the true Queen, but they’d had time enough to consider her offer.

Arelon looked up in surprise when he saw that letter. “Lady Seraphina? I wasn’t aware you were in correspondence with her.”

Suliel raised an eyebrow. “Do you consider yourself aware of all my correspondence partners?” she asked.

“Ah, no— not at all, my lady,” Arelon bowed his head, stuttering with embarrassment. “It’s just— The lady is quite prominent at court. It’s quite an achievement for a… new noble like yourself to be connected to her.”

“New? Or do you mean lowly country baron?” Suliel pressed.

“Ah, I would never say— your rank is far in excess of my own— that is just—” Arelon stammered.

“As it happens, you are correct,” Suliel said, waving away the man’s attempt at saving himself. “I was given her name by a mutual friend who told me she would be a valuable ally at court if I could win her favour. Hopefully, he has found time to mention my name to her.”

“I see,” Arelon said, bowing low. “My lady, I apologise for my impertinence—”

“There is no need,” Suliel said. “While I’m here, and possibly for some time after, my correspondence will go through you. If you are to serve me well, you need to know who I’m speaking to, and on what terms. It’s part of the great trust I am placing in you.”

“Yes, my lady,” Arelon said, bowing again.

Suliel must have made an impression on the man, as she felt another trickle of experience flow in from the interaction.

Nice, Kelsey put in. Knocking him off guard makes the lie go down easier.

Suliel didn’t reply, but she couldn’t disagree. She did trust Arelon, but just hearing the name Rose Circle put him in danger, and her as well. It was necessary that he didn’t know.

“I think that’s all for today,” she said aloud. “I think I’ll retire for the night.”

She had to announce it because a lady didn’t just wander off to bed. She needed to be helped out of her clothes, her hair had to be arranged for sleeping. It was awkward because the maids were new, made more so by the fact that she still thought of this room as belonging to her parents.

She bore with it, keeping a neutral expression on her face with some effort. When it was done, she dismissed her maids with a smile and approached the special chest.

The key was hung around her neck, kept safe and close, not because of the value of the contents but to protect others from its discovery. Bending low, she unlocked the chest and looked down at the cargo she had transported all the way from home.

“Bind Undead,” she said. Then, “Rise.”

With a muffled clatter, the bones in the chest rose up, forming themselves into a pair of skeletons. Each of them held a sword in one hand and as Suliel watched armour and helmets flew up and attached themselves to the animated bones. They stepped out of the chest in unison and the hand that wasn’t holding a sword saluted her.

I hope you appreciate that I’m giving you my best, Kelsey sent. Heckle and Jeckle, Toby and Moby.

You never call them the same thing twice, Suliel noted. And I know that you’ve got skeletons that carry guns.

True, but we’re not ready to show those off yet, Kelsey answered. These two will have to do until you’re able to control Tier Three undead.

You also told me that these two were your most troublesome skeletons.

They seem different with you, though, Kelsey replied.

It was true. In their experiments, the skeletons hadn’t shown any sign of the creative misunderstanding of orders that Kelsey always complained about. She had to order them with words, but the link that ran between them seemed to impart an understanding that ran deeper. They did what she wanted.

She pointed. “You, watch the windows, you watch the door. Don’t let anybody in until sunrise. Wake me if anyone tries to get in, and don’t kill the staff.

Man, I’d kill to have it that easy, Kelsey sent. How do they know who the staff are?

Suliel didn’t know, but she felt that the monsters understood. She felt… assurance come back down the link. She didn’t know why but she felt safe with them watching out for her.

Well, goodnight, Kelsey sent. Big day tomorrow.