Dungeons Just Want to Have Fun

“Ship! Ship sighted!” Zaphar called down from the masthead. Soraya looked up to see which way he was pointing and then looked through the binoculars that Kelsey had provided.

“These are very strange,” she commented. “It’s… a galley, and it’s flying Elitran flags.”

Kelsey grinned. “That means it’s on, right?” she asked Anton, who sighed.

“Yes, it’s on.” He turned the ship so it pointed in the direction Zaphar had pointed. “Aris, can you let everybody know?”

Aris nodded and headed down to tell the girls on the mid-deck and below-deck what was going on. Kelsey sauntered off to fetch her “gunner’s apprentice”, Chiea. No one else was willing to go near the deadly contraption on the ship’s bow, despite Kelsey’s best efforts. Cheia, though, was desperate to get a combat class before they made it home, and the… gun was the quickest way to rack up the required number of kills.

Aris had resisted, but Kelsey had pointed out that the safest place when the gun was firing was behind it. That had been the opposite of reassuring for everybody else, but Chiea was going to get her chance.

Soraya had to shift position to keep track of the galley. Anton wondered at the decision to put the steering wheel at the back of the ship. It was lucky that the sails were still furled. As it was he had a decidedly impaired view of where they were going. If the sails had been in the way, he would have been practically blind.

“Are you sure you’re all right with this?” he asked. “These are Elitrans, probably courl like you.”

“It can’t be helped,” Soraya said. For a moment, she sounded lost and uncertain. Then she managed to return to her previously haughty tone. “Of course, it could have been helped, with a little foresight. Who plans an ocean voyage without bringing a map?”

“I’m sure we could have gotten one if we left as planned,” Anton muttered.

“Not as easily as you seem to think,” Soraya countered. “A map is a prized treasure of merchant families. The ones we’re about to steal will be considered military secrets.”

She broke off from examining their target long enough to glare at him before returning her attention to the binoculars.

“If I’d known the need, I could have copied one from my family’s archive,” she said. “But I didn’t know—”

She stopped. “Wait, I think they’ve seen us,” she reported. “They’re turning and running.”

“What!” Kelsey screeched from the other end of the boat. She came bounding back. “They can’t do that, they’re navy! They can’t turn their tails and run!”

“Maybe it’s the flag,” Anton suggested.

“First of all, the flag is awesome,” Kelsey said. “That’s unrelated to anything going on, but it doesn’t get said enough.”

“That’s a little rich, considering that you came up with it,” Anton pointed out.

“Oh, I wish I came up with it,” Kelsey said. “But that very important point is unrelated to the situation at hand. Since we’ve only just started flying it, no one knows what it means, and so no one can be running from it.”

“I don’t know,” Anton said. “It kind of paints a promise, you know?”

He looked up at the black flag with white bones painted on it.

“I doubt they can make out such fine and awesome detail at this distance,” Kelsey said. “They don’t have binoculars.”

“They might have a spyglass though, and Long-sight is a common Trait among sailors,” Soraya argued. “But I think another Trait might be at work here. Warriors have Traits that evaluate their opponents, yes? It seems that a ship’s captain might have a Trait that evaluates ships.”

Everyone looked forward, to where Chiea was carefully not touching the Decksweeper from as close a distance as possible.

“That might show up on one of those senses,” Kelsey admitted.

“So what are we doing?” Aris asked, coming up to join in the conversation.

“That’s up to our captain, but them running doesn’t really change the situation at all. We’ll just have to run them down first, right?”

Anton paused before answering Kelsey. The main reason he’d insisted on taking a map from a military ship was that he knew how bloody it was going to get. If he was going to kill half a ship’s crew, he wanted it to be a blow against the raiders who attacked his home, not a vicious attack on merchants who had done him no harm.

The Elitran navy was chasing him, or was supposed to be. He doubted that they just let their enemies go. When his target ran, it meant they feared him, which wasn’t what he wanted.

On the other hand, nothing had changed. They still needed that map, and that ship was still part of the raider’s navy.

“We’ll chase them down,” he confirmed. “The engine isn’t going to get tired.”

He pushed forward on the throttle. Not to the level that Kelsey said was dangerous, but enough to notice the extra speed and noise.

“Yo ho ho,” Kelsey said. “I’ll just head back to the front then.”

It didn’t take long to catch up. The galley was fleeing, but the direction it was fleeing in wasn’t good for the wind. Had it chosen to run with the wind, it might have made a difference, but that direction would…

Anton thought about it and realised that he didn’t know where that direction would take them. With no land in sight, he’d lost all hope of keeping his bearings. He could only assume that there was no help for the galley downwind.

Now that they were closer, the captain must have realised that the galley had no chance of escape. It was turning, probably as fast as they could. Anton could see that this ship was smaller than the ones they had fought before. Still slim and deadly, but shorter. It only had about half a dozen archers on the bow deck, just now coming into view. If those were archers…

They were lighting sticks on fire, so they were probably archers.

“Ware incoming fire!” Kelsey called. Anton was already aware, but this was part of the system they’d worked out. He got ready to swerve.

“Arrows away!” Kelsey said. Anton might have needed the warning if the sails were up. As they’d planned, he jerked the wheel to the side and turned the throttle up a notch. Just for a bit, then he pointed the ship at the galley again.

A few moments later, the arrows plunged into the sea, well off to… starboard, Anton was pretty sure. At this range, dodging was pretty effective, but Anton wanted to get closer. Kelsey’s gun could cover this distance, but Anton wanted more than a wild spray.

Really, what Anton wanted was for Aris to pick off the archers with her rifle, but naval battles had proved to be challenging. With both her and her target moving, her Sure Shot was unable to compensate. Anton wondered if she might be offered a trait to help with that in the future, but for now, she was hard-pressed to hit a target at thirty yards, even with the rifle.

Kelsey wasn’t any more accurate, but the destructive nature of her weapon meant that increased inaccuracy just meant the devastation was spread over a wider area. That wasn’t ideal, but Anton hoped that it meant he could finish the battle without too many needless casualties.

“Closing in to fire!” Kelsey yelled. “Everyone, make sure you have your protection on!”

Soraya dropped the binoculars and clutched her customised earmuffs to her head. They were supposed to stay in place without help, but she wasn’t taking any chances.

Anton refrained from yelling a reminder about where to target. Chiea was behind the trigger and she wouldn’t target the slaves for levels or for laughs.

The Decksweeper roared. Anton felt the vibration in his bones and thanked Kelsey again for his helmet with sonic protection. It was a shorter burst this time, but it lasted long enough. In the blink of an eye, the bow platform where the archers had stood was gone, and the archers with it.

The enemy captain was trying to twist his ship around, to come about and stab Anton with that ram of his. The slaves on one side of the galley raised their oars, while the other side rowed twice as hard. It was a stunning display of coordination.

Anton felt sorry for them. It must take real skill to move a ship like that. Learned over years by every member of the crew, from the Captain to the slaves and everyone in between. By contrast, Anton just had to turn a wheel and push a lever. His ship was shorter and his motive force was stronger. For all the skill of the other crew, they couldn’t turn faster than he could.

In moments they were behind the other ship. The crew manning the tiller must have seen death staring at them from the barrel of Kelsey’s gun. As one, they let go of it. Some of them fell to their knees, others waved their arms frantically in the air. One of them jumped overboard.

“I think they’re trying to surrender, Captain!” Kelsey called. Anton cut their speed, so they didn’t overrun the boat. Cheia kept the gun pointed at them.

A few moments later, an order was given and all the oars were raised in the air. Then they started to get pulled back inside. The flags started to get pulled down.

“It seems we’ve won,” Soraya said. “Now what?”

The next bit was a boarding party. It was Anton, Aris and Kelsey in the lead, with Lena and Syrena, armed with pistols, backing them up. Chiea was left manning the Decksweeper, with strict instructions not to fire it for any reason. Just having her sweep the barrel back and forth was enough to terrify the crew on board.

Anton was the first to leap across. Spider-climb helped him keep his grip on non-vertical surfaces as well. He helped the others as they jumped across one by one. Aris was the only one to stumble and need catching.

“Wish I’d thought of that,” Kelsey said, winking.

Anton ignored her and faced the assembled crew. They were a mixed bunch of courl and human, all in military uniform, but none of them had weapons visible. They flinched as he walked up, hand on his sword.

“Kelsey, Captain’s cabin,” he ordered.

“Yessir!” Kelsey said, saluting. She had tied a brightly coloured scarf around her head for some reason.

“Who’s in charge?” he asked the crew in front of him. One of the courl stepped forward.

“I am, sir. Asim Darzan, Captain of the Razorfin.”

Anton swallowed. “How many casualties did you suffer?” he blurted. It shouldn’t have been his main concern, but it was.

The captain’s ears flicked back and forth and he glanced over at Chiea. “Four marines were killed, two were injured, but… I don’t expect them to make it back to port. Two crew were injured from… flying splinters, and one galley slave had his leg broken when the deck fell on him. We threw a rope off the side for Talik, he’s climbing back up.”

Anton glanced over to where the wounded were lying. It matched up with what he’d been told.

“Is this everyone, then?” he asked. Not counting the wounded, there were ten crew in front of him.

“Master Koram is overseeing the slaves below.”

“How many slaves do you have?”

“Two dozen, twelve oars a side. We only do three-day patrols, there’s no call for support services.”

“Support services?” Anton asked.

The courl looked nervous. “Ah… doxies, sir. For morale on longer voyages.”

Anton tried not to let it get to him. They didn’t have doxies on this boat. He didn’t need to do anything about that. That just left one problem.

“Got it!” Kelsey said, coming out of the cabin. “There was some other stuff, I’m looking into it.”

“Great,” Anton replied. He gestured for her to step away from the crew with him.

“Kelsey,” he whispered urgently. “There’s twenty-four slaves on board! We can’t fit them all on our ship!”

“No problem,” Kelsey said. “We’ve got a perfectly good ship here for them, only slightly used.” She glanced over at the splintered remains of the forward deck. “Some slight foxing.”

“This ship?” Anton said. “But what happens to the existing crew?”

“You were planning on letting them go, I know,” Kelsey said. “But it might be a better idea to give their victims a taste of justice.”