LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 164: Cosmic Thing
Hi hi, it's me, currently shaking and shaking right now, Madeleine the Maid here. Not only am I shaking, but so is Rika, and also the car. Shaking and shaking and shaking. Why is there shaking? The giant rock lobster grabbed the car with one of its pinchers and started shaking it. By the way, only Rika and I are in the car. Mel and Rio got sick and retreated into the Shadowrealm, and Sherry is somewhere in the sky, let me look outside. Mhmm… yep… I can't see her. I do see her giant axe, though. It's lodged right into the lobster's shell. I can see that elf with the flagpole trying to get it out.
"So Millie Migans, Sofia Proch and Rita Bogen." Rika turned to me, relaxed and still despite being inside a shaking car. "What're you going to do, Madeleine?"
"Stay in the car and enjoy the ride, obviously."
"Alright."
And so we sat there, our arms in the air, shaking without a care (or a choice).
A few moments later
The car is still shaking, but the rock lobster has gone weird. Like, really weird. It kinda looks like the night sky, just with more stars and no moons. It also dropped the car. The only reason the car is still shaking is because of the shockwaves caused by the fight between the giant space rock lobster and Sherry.
Yep, Sherry is back on the ground. You should've seen the fall. She was freefalling while holding onto the wing of an unconscious dragon that was the same size as the weird giant space rock lobster. Oh yeah, the dragon is also fighting. The surrounding environment is looking even worse than before.
"Ridiculous, is it not?"
"The super weird, giant space rock lobster, or the dragon shooting swords out of its wings?"
"Neither. What's ridiculous is that Sherry is winning."
"Oh, that makes sense." I nodded. "It'd be bad if she lost, though, since she's our driver."
"Excellent point. A shame there didn't happen to be a single person that was resurrected that could drive. Is there not a shadow clone that could possibly know how to drive?"
"You know the answer."
"Yes, I do. Only a train, not a car." She looked back at the fight. "So you going to join? I know you could go toe-to-toe with them."
"Me? Join a fight? I'd rather not… they're boring."
"Heh. Expected."
And so we continued watching the fight.
A lot of moments later
The car has stopped shaking. Why? The rock lobster is flying now. Yep, it's flying. It grew wings. How? I have no idea.
"Divinity. I recognise it. It reminds me of Ryla." Rika turned to me. "Did you know your grandmother is one of the most proficient with Divinity across the multiverse? She practically breathes it."
"Which grandmother?"
"Hmm… the bland one."
"I haven't met my grandmas, so I have no idea."
"No matter. Return to your inner monologue."
The giant rock lobster is flying and shooting lasers down at the ground. There are so many craters. They've even hit the car, and man, it is really durable. The Golemancer sure knows how to make things that can't break.
The dragon is flying too and has a giant sword in its mouth. Its swings are lacking, its follow-ups are slow, and its form is fucking atrocious. I could beat it with nothing but parries, and yes, that includes its fire breath. The fire breath of a dragon is surprisingly easy to parry. Trust me.
Sherry is also in the air. She isn't flying, though, but is instead using a special technique that she made up herself. You will be surprised by how it works. Simply put, she kicks the air, thinking it's a fight in her mind, and since she always wins, she wins the fight against the air, kicks against it, and moves up. I am not making that up.
Oh, and two of the captain's harem members joined the fight. It's a giant squid being lifted up by a ghost. For some reason, a bunch of shadow clones are hanging onto the squid (Whose name is apparently Alex), and are throwing random things at the rock lobster and dragon. I'm honestly tempted to join the fight, only to take out my shadow clones… actually, you know what? I'll do exactly that.
Not so many moments later
I have done it. I came second place. I wasn't going to win, obviously, Sherry is in the fight, but I sure as hell wasn't going to lose to my shadow clones. They were the hard part, by the way. The dragon was decapitated by the rock lobster, then the rock lobster was suddenly assassinated by an unknown sniper. Well, unknown to everyone. My eyesight is exceptional, borderline supernatural… just kidding, I used basic magic. It was my mom. The nice one that hasn't tried killing my girlfriend.
All that was left was me, Sherry, and the giant squid lifted by a ghost with nearly two dozen shadow clones hanging onto it. The squid was pretty easy to deal with. Do you know what I did? I let Sherry fight it. Easiest plan of my life.
Then the shadow clones swarmed me. I went bang, boom, badda-bing. Nothing beats the original. I stood on top of a pile of myself, proud with what I did, then I got immediately socked in the face by Sherry.
So yeah, now we're sitting in the car. Just me, Sherry, and Rika. Where are we going? Somewhere, Rika won't tell me. Rio and Mel are going to stay in the Shadowrealm. Rio is busy fighting a bunch of the revived guys, and Mel is getting pulled all over the place by the sentient shadow clones. They love their mother-in-law.
Oh, as for what happened to Mimi, her princess bride, and the flag elf, they died. Just kidding. They're in the Shadowrealm.
Chapter namesake: The Cosmic Thing album by The B-52's
