Chapter 15
Chapter 14 – Mood
As of 14:00:00, Jian Qing had not spoken to her for 4 hours.
At 10 o’clock in the morning, Jian Qing took a bag of oranges and went to the piano room to find her.
Lu Yinxi is sure that Jian Qing came to find her, and the bag of oranges was also for her.
Because she just said a few days ago that she wanted to eat small tangerines, one bite at a time, she can eat thirty at a time.
In the end, the bag of oranges in Jian Qing’s hand was given to Mrs. Zhou, and when he turned to leave, he didn’t even say hello to her, only showing her a thin back.
Today, Jian Qing was on the second-line shift, and she didn’t go home to rest at noon. The nurse on duty ordered meals, and the cafeteria delivered them directly.
The staff on duty ate around the office, and Jian Qing would exchange a few words with others briefly, but he ignored Lu Yinxi, not even making eye contact.
Lu Yinxi buried her head in grilling the rice, and looked up at Jian Qing from time to time.
Jian Qing seldom talks, but there is no shortage of eye contact with her.
In the past, when she looked at Jian Qing, Jian Qing would always tacitly notice her gaze, turn his head, and stare at her quietly.
Not saying a word, just looking at each other quietly can also give her a unique peace of mind.
Now, she is deliberately ignoring her.
Must be angry…
Lu Yinxi could vaguely guess that it was because of his own words.
But, why should she care about her own words?
Don’t dare to think deeply, and don’t want to think deeply.
If you decide to leave, you should restrain all curiosity and prying desire, and don’t get too deep into her behavior and motives.
The deeper you study, the more you understand.
The distance between each other is just right here, and there is no need to go any further.
As if she was angry because her canary said something she shouldn’t have said and brushed her face, not because of any deeper subtle emotions.
Lu Yinxi lowered his head and sighed softly.
She didn’t want to think deeply, but wanted to appease Jian Qing’s emotions.
Just like yesterday, Jian Qing was always by her side, accompanying and comforting her silently.
During the lunch break, Jian Qing lay down on the desk to take a nap, Lu Yinxi was like a cat that did something wrong, obediently guarding her side, watching her sleep, and finally yawned a few times, playing a trick machine, hooked her sleeve with his index finger, and lay down on the table to accompany her to sleep.
When I woke up, it was exactly 14:00, half an hour before going to work.
Lu Yinxi was wearing his overcoat.
Jian Qing sat beside her, slowly peeling the oranges.
She was lying on the table without getting up, sniffing the fragrance of citrus, staring at Jian Qing’s long and fair fingers, and kept looking.
The orange was peeled, and the white veins of the orange petals were picked off by Jian Qing, like a peeled egg, soft and clean.
The orange petals were sent to the lips, and the red lips parted slightly, sliding into the mouth.
The slight sound of chewing came into his ears, Lu Yinxi stared at Jian Qing’s red lips, couldn’t help it, and made a swallowing movement.
Jian Qing noticed that she was waking up, lowered her eyes, and glanced at her coldly.
Lu Yinxi quickly got up from the table, walked quickly to the boiling water room, poured a large glass of cold water, poured it into his stomach, and quenched the heat on his face and the dryness in his heart.
It’s just eating an orange, why do you stare at her and can’t take your eyes off her?
After pouring two large cups of cold water, Lu Yinxi walked out of the boiling water room and returned to the office, but Jian Qing was no longer there.
There was an extra strip of peeled citrus in her place.
The white veins of the orange petals were picked off and placed neatly on a round plastic plate.
You can tell who made it at a glance.
Lu Yinxi washed his hands, walked over, pinched a petal and put it into his mouth. The cool and sweet citrus blossomed in his mouth, and the image of Jian Qing sitting next to her, seriously peeling the orange with downcast eyes, played back over and over again in his mind.
The heart is both sweet and astringent.
It’s like stepping on a floating glass bridge, eating a piece of candy, my eyes are full of sweetness, I inadvertently look down, and there is a deep abyss under my feet, and I start to worry again.
At 14:30, doctors, medical students, and patients poured into the office one after another, starting a new round of busyness.
Jian Qing hadn’t come back after going out, Lu Yinxi saw the old lady Zhou hovering at the door.
She went out to say hello: “Teacher Zhou.”
Restraining her anxiety, Teacher Zhou asked, “Good afternoon, Doctor Xiaolu. I want to ask if Lao Zhao’s test came out?”
Jian Qing asked her to come to the office in the afternoon in the morning. She didn’t rest all afternoon, and when it was time to go to work, she came to the office to squat.
Every once in a while, doctors will evaluate the treatment effect of tumor patients, measure the size of the lesion according to the test results, and make a curative effect assessment of disease progression, stable disease, partial remission, and complete remission.
Lu Yinxi understood the anxiety of the family members at this time, and calmly said: “Let me take a look for you.”
She logged into the doctor’s workstation with Jian Qing’s account, and clicked on the inspection reports of the 24-bed old lady Zhao to view them one by one.
Jiangzhou No. 1 Hospital launched an electronic signature system the year before last. All medical records and documents are electronic. All diagnosis and treatment processes are managed in a closed-loop and paperless manner. Doctors no longer carry medical record folders during ward rounds, but directly carry iPads with them.
“The results of routine tests such as blood routine, blood biochemistry, and tumor markers have come out, but the results of chest CT have not yet come out. The closed-loop management shows that it has reached the level of review by the superior doctor. At most…” Lu Yinxi relied on his personal Judging from experience, “The report will be available in an hour at most.”
“We have to wait another hour…” Mr. Zhou stared at the computer screen with anxious eyes, “Then, can we tell whether the test result is good or bad now?”
Lu Yinxi saw that in the tumor marker test sheet, the two indicators of CEA and CA125 had significantly increased, hesitated for a while, and shook his head: “No, the results of imaging studies should prevail, and the doctor can only see it after seeing the film. Does the lesion get bigger or smaller.”
“These nights, Lao Zhao hasn’t been able to sleep well. He has been dizzy and vomiting… I’m afraid that the tumor may have metastasized to other places… It’s been two years… I’ve persisted for two years… I’m afraid that there will be something next, the next What a bad outcome…”
Lu Yinxi was slightly taken aback.
In my impression, the old man in front of me has always been an elegant and decent image. She doesn’t talk much. She is not as enthusiastic and lively as the old lady Zhao.
How could there be such a panicked side.
Lu Yinxi looked at the computer screen, and saw that in the check column, in addition to chest CT, Jian Qing also had a brain MRI image check.
Are you suspecting brain metastases?
Brain metastasis of lung cancer is a common condition in patients with advanced lung cancer, and the typical manifestations are dizziness, headache, and projectile vomiting.
Lu Yinxi did not dare to express too much emotion, and comforted the old man: “Ms. Zhou, we will not know until all the test results come out. Teacher Zhao is in good physical condition and has a very positive attitude. We must have confidence in her.”
“Thank you, I’ll come back later…” Mr. Zhou forced a smile and left with his head down.
Lu Yinxi watched her stagger away.
Cancer afflicts not only the patient, but also the whole family, especially those closest to the patient.
In the hospital, we can see a lot of people’s warm and cold, the world’s cold and cold, and the true feelings of adversity.
Lu Yinxi remembered that he had gone to the 24th bed to practice asking Mrs. Zhao’s medical history, but she was dragged by Mrs. Zhao to chatter about her parents’ complaints for a long time.
Mrs. Zhao said that she is a native of Jiangzhou. She has a second-married husband and a stepson in a neighboring city. Since she fell ill, her husband and stepson have never visited the hospital in the future. She has only decades of old colleagues and old neighbors by her side. Teacher Zhou. The so-called love and family relationship are sometimes not as good as a sincere neighborhood friendship.
When she was young, her parents and elders all told her that women must marry and have children, so that when she gets old and sick, she will have someone to accompany her and have security.
As everyone knows, there have been many infatuated parents since ancient times, who has seen filial children and grandchildren?
Jian Qing came back from the thoracic surgery consultation, and when she took the elevator, she met her classmate, a doctor who is now working in the pediatrics department.
The two greeted each other, and Jian Qing stared at her pocket and asked, “Is there any more candy?”
Pediatricians keep candies in their pockets to coax children all the year round. They are the most tempered and gentle doctors in the hospital. Those who have a bad temper either change careers or are chopped off by the patient’s family.
“Yes.” The pediatrician smiled and grabbed a handful of candies, “I can’t see that you like to eat toffee. Is this the cute contrast that young people often say? We have a lot of subjects, and we often come to sit if we like to eat sit.”
Jian Qing reservedly thanked her.
She doesn’t like sugar.
Only brats like sweets.
Back in the office, Jane checked the results of the MRI examination of Mrs. Zhao’s brain, and clearly saw the temporal lesions.
The doctors under her team came over to look at it together: “Brain metastases?”
Jian Qing was silent for a while, then hummed, and said, “She has been with me for two years…”
The air was a little silent, and no one wanted to see this result.
Stepping into the oncology department, not only patients have psychological expectations, but doctors and nurses also have self-knowledge. It is difficult to cure here. More often, we can only witness the slow struggle of each patient and the departure of each patient.
Zhang Yue bowed his head and said: “Yes, she has been treated here for two years, and she said the day before yesterday that she would introduce a daughter-in-law to me.”
Wei Mingming was a little frustrated: “Oh, I feel like none of us can save…”
Zhao Wenqian pointed to the red slogan on the wall: “See, ‘Sometimes to heal, often to help, always to comfort’, this is the oncology department.”
Zhang Yue: “Her family is ruthless enough, and they have never visited her once.”
Zhao Wenqian: “My mother always urges me to get married and have children, saying that only when I’m old will someone take care of me. Tsk, marriage is not necessarily a safe haven. It’s better to have a better relationship with friends. Maybe you can get me a hand in critical times.”
Jian Qing shook her head: “It’s better to make more money.”
The ability to resist risks can only be given by oneself and cannot be placed on any relationship.
Before anyone else could speak, Jian Qing calmly said, “Wei Mingming, go and call Teacher Zhou over.”
Mrs. Zhou was called to the doctor’s office, and Lu Yinxi sat beside Mrs. Zhao’s bed, and she continued to introduce her to her.
After a few laughs, Mrs. Zhao suddenly said, “Little Deer, I want to die.”
Lu Yinxi was stunned, but held her hand instead, and comforted her softly: “Don’t think like this, Teacher Zhou will be sad.”
“I was afraid that she would be sad, so I didn’t tell her in front of her. Don’t tell her…”
Lu Yinxi held her hand tightly: “Okay, I won’t say it, you can tell me what you think, if you say it, you will feel better.”
The old lady Zhao smiled, her wrinkles huddled together: “Let’s continue to talk about my student, he is really young and promising, and he has a good character. It would be a pity if you missed it…”
Lu Yinxi couldn’t tell if the old man in front of her was really optimistic, or if she forced herself to smile and pretend to be optimistic because others didn’t want her to be negative.
After Mrs. Zhou came back, Lu Yinxi left space for them and got up to go back to the office.
Jian Qing must have come back.
She wanted to see Jian Qing, but was afraid of seeing Jian Qing, so she walked slowly along the wall.
Walking in the ward of the oncology department, you can see a lot of misery.
In the ward, there are gastric cancer patients who have undergone a total gastrectomy. They cannot eat anything, and feel heartburn and acid regurgitation when lying down, so they have to sit on the hospital bed all night; Skinny, no longer human, like a skeleton covered in human skin; there is a lung cancer patient with tubes inserted into his body, there is no hope of treatment, and the doctor is already communicating with the patient’s family whether to give up the rescue in the next emergency…
All the awkward little emotions disappeared at this time.
In the face of life and death, all human emotions become extremely small and extremely precious.
Even if it is awkward, it is also a manifestation of life.
Eating, walking, breathing fresh air, these ordinary things, in the eyes of some people, are unattainable luxuries.
Walking to the corner of the corridor, he suddenly bumped into a soft embrace.
Lu Yinxi took a step back, looked up, and saw that indifferent face, his body reacted one step ahead of his reason, and immediately approached her, reaching out to hug her waist like a rascal, and said softly: “Doctor Jane, don’t give birth to me angry.”