Chapter 74
The journey to the clinic was an awkward silence, a tapestry woven with unspoken words and heavy tension. The city streets flowed past the car's windows, a kaleidoscope of colours and sounds, but Ashleigh and Elijah remained silent, their thoughts a chasm between them.
Ashleigh's heart pounded in her chest, each beat a drum echoing her trepidation. She could feel his gaze occasionally, heavy and unyielding, yet when she turned to meet his eyes, he would avert his own, looking out into the world beyond the car's confines. The silence was suffocating, a weight pressing down on them both.
As the car pulled up to the clinic, the silence shattered into a million pieces. Ashleigh and Elijah stepped out of the vehicle, their faces painted with a mixture of apprehension and lingering tension. The journey to the clinic had been an uncomfortable one, filled with unspoken words and heavy emotions. But as they stood before the entrance, they knew that their silence would soon be broken.
“Well…this is it,” Ashleigh whispered, her voice barely audible, her hands slightly trembling.
She took a deep breath, a feeble attempt to steady her nerves. However, as she closed her eyes momentarily, she felt something, something she had craved for weeks and yet hadn’t allowed herself to act upon. She looked down to notice Elijah’s hand, wrapped around hers like a comfort blanket, a warm and reassuring gesture that brought her solace.
“I'm here for you,” he whispered, his voice low and reassuring, “you’re not alone in this,” he added with a faint smile, his words carrying the weight of unspoken understanding.
Ashleigh couldn’t help but smile, gently nodding her head and acknowledging his words of reassurance.
Without another word, the pair entered the doors to the clinic, as it had been previously, its waiting room filled with women at all different stages in their journey, from different walks of life.
“You take a seat, I’ll get you booked in,” said Elijah softly, “Dr Reid…wasn’t it?” he asked.
Ashleigh nodded before following his instructions to go and find a seat. As she made her way to the waiting room, she heard a familiar voice call out to her.
“Hey…Ashleigh, wasn’t it?” said the female voice.
Ashleigh looked around to see Joanna, the lady she had met last time who was pregnant with twins, waving to her.
Ashleigh smiled back, a wave of warmth washing over her as she saw Joanna's welcoming gesture. Joanna motioned towards the empty seat beside her, extending an invitation to join her in the unspoken camaraderie of shared experience.
Ashleigh took Joanna up on the invitation, sitting in the seat beside her,
“It’s lovely to see you again, Ashleigh,” said Joanna, “Look at you, starting to blossom now,” she added her smile radiating an understanding that transcended words. She gestured towards Ashleigh's stomach, a silent acknowledgement of the miracle they were both striving for.
“Getting there, I guess,” Ashleigh replied sheepishly, her voice tinged with a mixture of nervousness and excitement.
“How are you feeling?” Joanna asked, her voice gentle.
“A little overwhelmed, honestly,” Ashleigh admitted. “You know…like it still doesn't feel real.”
Joanna nodded understandingly.
“I remember that feeling well. It's like you're on the cusp of something life-changing, and it can be scary and exciting all at the same time.”
“Exactly,” Ashleigh said. “I'm excited for the future, but I'm also nervous about what's to come.”
Joanna reached out and took Ashleigh's hand.
“I'll tell you what I tell everyone I meet here: take it one day at a time. Don't overwhelm yourself with thinking too far ahead. Just focus on the present moment, and everything else will fall into place,” she explained with a warm smile.
“Thanks…that’s some pretty sound advice,” replied Ashleigh with a smile.
Joanna smiled,
“Listen, I know this may be a little forward of me,” she said, “but there’s a group of us…you know, girls I’ve met here, we all support one another, go out, do stuff like grab coffee…you know…like Mum dates,” she joked. “is that something you’d be interested in?” asked Joanna.
Ashleigh's eyes widened as she considered Joanna's suggestion.
“Mum dates?” she repeated, a hesitant smile forming on her lips. The idea of connecting with other pregnant women, of understanding the journey together, was both appealing and unnerving at the same time, it was definitely somewhere she never imagined she would be welcome.
“It's not like a club or anything…more a group of friends,” Joanna chuckled, noticing Ashleigh's apprehension, “just a bunch of mamas-to-be who want to share their experiences and maybe grab a coffee and/or cake without having to worry about the kids. It can just be nice to know you're not alone, you know, learn from each other sort of thing, always have the ear of someone...or a group, when you need a rant."
“I erm…I don’t really know what to say,” replied Ashleigh timidly.
“I tell you what, how about I just give you my number, and we add you to the WhatsApp group, if you feel it’s not your thing, just tell me,” explained Joanna with a huge smile.
“Erm…sure,” muttered Ashleigh, taking out her mobile phone and quickly exchanging phone numbers.
“Great, I’ll drop you a text later in the week,” Joanna exclaimed, her enthusiasm undeterred.
Ashleigh smiled as she put her phone back into her handbag. As she did so, she noticed Elijah making his approach,
“All booked in,” he announced, his gaze then shifting to Joanna.
“I’m guessing this is the father-to-be?” Joanna asked, her eyes scanning Elijah from head to toe.
“Indeed,” replied Elijah with a warm smile, his gaze meeting Joanna's with a mixture of politeness and intrigue. “I’m Elijah…and you are?”
“You never told me he was so handsome,” Joanna whispered to Ashleigh before shifting her attention back to Elijah. “I’m Joanna. It's a pleasure to meet you,” she announced with a smile, extending her hand towards Elijah.
Elijah's smile deepened, a flicker of amusement dancing in his eyes,
“Honestly, the pleasure is all mine,” he said, reaching out to delicately shake her hand.
Just then, a nurse called out Joanna’s name, her voice booming throughout the waiting room.
“That would be me,” said Joanna shuffling forward in her seat to stand up, her movements hampered by her burgeoning belly.
“Here, let me give you a hand,” said Elijah, offered Elijah, reaching out to assist the heavily pregnant woman.
With a groan, Joanna was finally up on her feet, she smiled as she thanked Elijah for his assistance before she turned back to Ashleigh,
“Such a caring gentleman you have,” she said warmly.
“Isn’t he,” replied Ashleigh with a smile.
“I’ll be in touch Ash, honestly, you’ll love the rest of the group, I know that for certain,” said Joanna as she waved and began to slowly make her way towards the nurse.
“Well,” exclaimed Elijah, taking the seat beside Ashleigh, “she seems…friendly,” he added with a smile, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
“Yeah…Joanna’s lovely,” replied Ashleigh, a soft smile playing on her lips.
“And what’s this group she speaks of so fondly?” he asked with a hint of amusement in his voice.
“Oh nothing,” replied Ashleigh, “She just wants me to join her little group of Mum’s-to-be. I’m not quite sure it’s for me though,” she added with a chuckle.
“Oh really? Why so?” Elijah asked.
“Oh yeah, like I’m gonna fit in with a load of pregnant women, Elijah, you know after who…I was…” Ashleigh said, making sure to keep her voice low so as to only be heard by Elijah.
“Who you were is irrelevant, Ashleigh,” said Elijah with a smile, “It’s who you are now that is important. Besides, I think it may do you good.”
Ashleigh gazed at Elijah, her heart filled with a mixture of trepidation and wonder. Despite her initial reservations, Joanna's enthusiasm had planted a tiny seed of intrigue within her. Perhaps, she wondered, joining this group could be a step towards healing and embracing a new chapter in her life.
As she pondered her options, Elijah continued to encourage her.
“Think about it, Ashleigh. You said how you’ve been feeling somewhat alone and how you felt as though you didn’t fit in, maybe this is the remedy for that. It could be a great way to connect with other women who are going through similar experiences. You never know, you might just find some new friends along the way,” he explained. “However…one thing I will advise…Ashleigh, you need to let go of who you were…I do believe that is now starting to hold you back. If you are now who you want to be…you need to embrace her and move forward.”
Ashleigh nodded slowly, her mind swirling with thoughts. Maybe Elijah was right, maybe she was alienating herself because of her past. After all, at this very moment, she felt insecure, feeling like she didn’t belong and that she was an imposter. Glancing around the waiting room, filled with expectant mothers, only amplified her anxieties. She imagined them whispering behind her back, 'Look at her, she's just pretending to be normal, she thinks she’s one of us but she’s really a man.'
The weight of their perceived judgment pressed down on her, threatening to crush her. Just as she was about to crumble under the burden of her anxieties, a voice cut through the silence.
“Miss Ashleigh Pritchard,” a nurse's voice called out, breaking the spell. The sound of her name, her new name, jolted Ashleigh back to the present. Her gaze flickered towards the nurse, a beacon of hope amidst the storm of uncertainty raging within her.
“Come on darling,” said Elijah with a warm smile, gently guiding Ashleigh to her feet.
Ashleigh felt her cheeks begin to flush as she got to her feet, she took one more glance around the waiting room, expecting all eyes to be on her as the nurse had brought even more attention to her. She expected to see the sight of these women whispering among themselves, with pointed fingers towards the outsider, the imposter who was now standing on full display in their midst. And yet, she quickly found none of this to be true, most of the women didn’t even look in her direction, instead, they sat patiently awaiting their name to be called. And those who did cast their gaze in her direction simply offered a warm, supportive smile.
Her eyes flickered back towards the nurse who stood patiently waiting for her, clipboard in hand, she too smiled as their eyes met.
Elijah took Ashleigh by the arm and with a look of pride on his face, he began to walk with her towards the nurse.
“How are we feeling?” asked the nurse as the couple got close to her, “I bet you’re all excited to see your little one.”
“Yes,” replied Elijah with a smile as he looked at Ashleigh, whose words appeared to get caught in her throat. “Both excited and nervous,” added Elijah, answering on her behalf.
The couple then followed the nurse along the corridor to Dr Reid’s office. As they entered the sterile white room, they were greeted by the friendly, smiling face of Dr Reid,
“Ashleigh, how lovely to see you again, you are looking well, “ said Dr Reid, her tone both professional and comforting. Her gaze then shifted to Elijah, her smile widening. “And who do we have with us today, is this Dad?” she asked.
“Yes…I’m Elijah,” he replied, his chest swelling with pride at being addressed as the father of Ashleigh's unborn child.
Dr Reid extended her hand in a welcoming gesture,
“It's a pleasure to meet you, Elijah. I'm so happy to see Ashleigh has such a wonderful support system,” she said, “I think it was Mum who I met last time, am I right?”
Ashleigh smiled and nodded as she was directed by the nurse and guided by Elijah, up onto the bed, where she shuffled around into a comfortable position as Dr Reid prepared the machine. Ashleigh then rolled up her jumper, revealing her slightly swollen stomach.
The whirring of the ultrasound machine filled the room, a comforting hum against the backdrop of Dr Reid's gentle voice,
“Okay, Ashleigh, just relax and let me take a peek. I'm going to put some gel on your tummy. It's just a bit cold, but it won't hurt,” she explained.
She wasn’t joking at all. The gel was cold, a stark contrast to the warmth of Elijah's hand clasped over hers. However, Ashleigh didn’t pay too much attention to it, her eyes were fixated on the screen, watching the grainy, black-and-white image.
“Right…okay there we go,” Dr Reid murmured, her eyes shining with happiness. “Look, Ashleigh, Elijah, that’s your little one right there,” she added with a huge smile.
Ashleigh’s heart swelled with a mix of shock and joy. She leaned closer, tracing the shape with her fingers. Elijah, his hand still entwined with hers, squeezed gently. A silent, unspoken understanding passed between them. Ashleigh was enthralled by the sight she was seeing on the monitor. It was one thing to be told that she had a tiny little life growing inside of her, but to witness it with her own eyes was something else entirely.
“Such a strong, healthy heartbeat,” explained Dr Reid, “Your baby is currently about the size of a strawberry, at this point, Ashleigh.”
The words, though simple, carried a weight that resonated deep within them. A strawberry, a tiny symbol of a life burgeoning with potential. Ashleigh's gaze remained fixed on the flickering image, a silent promise whispered between mother and child, a bond forged in that moment of shared wonder. She felt a tear, a tiny, sparkling testament to the overwhelming emotion surging through her, tracing a path down her cheek.
“Oh…Oh my,” exclaimed Dr Reid, “There’s…there appears to be something…” she added as she moved the wand around on Ashleigh’s tummy, her brow furrowed in concentration.
Both Ashleigh and Elijah turned their attention to Dr Reid, a shared anxiety creeping into their eyes.
“Is…is something wrong Doctor?” asked Elijah his voice a quiet tremor.
Dr Reid took a deep breath and continued,
“Well…” she muttered, “You see that…right…there?” she continued, pointing to the image on the screen, “There appears to be…a second heartbeat, Ashleigh.”
The air in the room seemed to thicken, their eyes locked on the monitor. The image of one tiny life was now accompanied by a second, faint flickering, a second heartbeat,
“Ashleigh…Elijah…congratulations…it appears you’re having twins,” Dr Reid declared, a radiant smile lighting up her face.