Chapter 103
*Rainelle’s POV
After parting with Miel, I pondered about it as I went around the Imperial Palace several times. The things I heard from Miel meant so much to me.
Some nobles dislike me.
This wasn't the time for leisure.
I should have guessed it even if I’m less intelligent.
About how many nobles would see me as a thorn in their eyes. And about how they must have been trying to get rid of me somehow.
It can also explain the mountain of work Karmeut had to do, which I had not realized until now.
At first, I thought it was because it was the beginning of his ascension, but right now it is too much to say that it is still the beginning. No, in the long run, this is an early period, but...
Ha... I mean, it became clear that Karmeut had so much work so far because of internal stability and the restraints from the nobles.
Thinking about it that way, me going to play to Aria was dangerous.
Karmeut allowed it… did he not know? ---No, I don't think that's the case. Karmeut is the type of person who would have made preparation one way or another.
And now, I‘m going to go to Aria’s place three days later and help her regarding the Crobanlock.
In the long run, this is important. But the issue related to the nobles is also important. And when I realized deep within my bones that my intellectual decline had been so severe up to now, I felt like I was going to suffocate in self-loathing.
Even a child can distinguish between those who like them and those who don’t. Of course, it's more of an instinct at that age, but in terms of instinct, I should have been more sensitive as a crow.
...but after all, there were only people who showed their good face by my side. Of course, they won’t openly talk to each other considering my position. Most people would show a good side on the outside even if they didn't like someone on the inside, right?
I sat down on the roof and sighed deeply.
---This is a serious situation.
The thought of whether or not I could do something about it came to mind.
Maybe it's something I didn't try to think about.
If that's really the case, then I'm a real bird head. Haha, it's a pity that my intelligence has deteriorated, but I'm still thinking it'll be okay up until now because Karmeut is doing well.
I don't think I can be that laidback now.
After spending my time on the roof for a while, I went back to my room. Being on the roof made me feel like baking in the sun. Maybe it's because the feathers are black.
Oh, is there really no solution? At this rate, even if I become an empress, I will be a stumbling block for Karmeut in many ways.
A stupid empress, an empress whose intelligence is equal to six or seven years old humans.
‘Wow, that's awesome then! How easy would it be to kill her!’ Haha, I’m going crazy!!
The conversation I had with Miel was brief, but it was enough to make me aware of reality. No, it was fully aware now. Because it made me confront the problem much more than just listening to the conversations of the two nobles. As a crow, I had complained about my intellectual decline, but how could I not be aware of people’s dissatisfaction?
A sense of danger resonated in my mind over and over again. Sadly, it only went round and round in my head without an exit.
So far, it seems that Karmeut is doing a good job, but where in the world can the Emperor do the works all by himself?
This is a fact that can be seen by taking a little look at history books.
Besides, the queen or empress is the king's companion, so it's basic for them to have power in their own way.
In that case, I have a lot of disadvantages.
Me? I’m a crow. Although I can transform into a human from eating Crobanlock, I’m a being whose abilities do not deviate from ordinary crows and ordinary humans.
I have made a contract with a spirit, but it’s just a low-level wind spirit. That won't stop anyone who's trying to assassinate me. I wouldn't be considered capable either.
I have no background compared to an ordinary aristocratic woman or princess. I have no power in social standing, nor do I have some impressive ability.
When I thought until that point, I was ripping my hair out unconsciously.
Aaa!! It hurts!!
I quickly let go. Then, vigorously, I slammed a pillow down.
"Ughh!! Why am I so incompetent!!"
Why! No, it’s even worse! My intelligence has gone down!! Ugh, crazy, crazy, crazy!!
"Sigh, if this is a cultivation world, I can somehow train and grow my spiritual level. But this is a Western-based world, isn't it? So it will be impossible."
I felt like blaming God again, so I raised my fists, but then I stopped.
"Wait, God?"
Let's think, think!! God, God... Ah yes!!
"Myrdin-nim!"
The last time I signed a contract with Mui, Myrdin-nim mentioned God! He was explaining about Crobanlock, but he mentioned it anyway!
"Black bird, the black bird that scatters its eggshells on the land."
A black bird believed to be a crow. Then, isn't the god of crows the black bird?
Like the wolf who gave the seed to the Wolfric family…
"---Should I go to the temple? No, but is there a temple dedicated to the black bird?"
I'm sure there isn't. It's obvious there isn't! If there is one, then there's no way humans would hate crows so much!
"...ahh, I want to get stronger..."
No, I want to gain abilities rather than become stronger! Ahh, I hope I at least maintain my full intelligence after possession!
From now on, I have to live among people. An Intellectual decline is so, so, so fatal!!
I have to look for a way to keep myself safe for now! Is there a way?!
"Hmmm, first of all, I need to find someone who is the most knowledgeable about the black bird..."
The male crow? ---But I didn't see it yesterday. And it's kind of weird to go meet that guy.
"Ummm... Ah! There is a crow that ate Crobanlock who is close to Myrdin-nim, right?"
An incredible 65-year-old crow! If the crow has lived more than three times the average lifespan of a crow, wouldn't he know something?!
As soon as I thought until that point, I immediately returned to my crow form. Then I flapped my wings quickly towards the office where Karmeut was working.
Karmeuttt!! Help me meet Myrdin-nim!! It's very important for you and me!!
*Karmeut’s POV
"Caaaw!"
Karmeut's hand, which was holding the quill, stopped writing. The familiar cries and flapping of wings were getting closer and closer.
"...? Rainelle?"
A crow flew in smoothly. Then, as she landed gently on the desk, the papers hovered slightly from the wind, then sank back down.
The crow, which was looking around with her purple eyes, soon turned into a human figure.
"Karmeut, I have a request..."
"What is it, Rainelle?"
At the word ‘request’, Karmeut straightened his posture. Rainelle opened her mouth in a slightly awkward but impatient voice,
"Um, can I meet Myrdin-nim?"
"...Myrdin-nim?"
"Yeah. I want to ask something."
Karmeut furrowed his eyebrows at that.
What is it that Rainelle suddenly wants to ask the Archmage?
The emperor looked around. ---Of course, there was no one there, but he asked the question only after he had heightened his senses and made sure that the area was truly clear.
"Can I know what you want to ask?"
Hearing that, Rainelle bit her lower lip. She wiggled her fingers as if contemplating something for a moment. Finally, she answered with a sigh,
"…Actually, I want to meet that crow who is a friend of Myrdin-nim."
"---Myrdin-nim's crow friend... The crow that ate Crobanlock? The one that has lived for over 60 years?"
Rainelle’s nod made Karmeut furrow deeper.
"Can I know why?"
"Uh... That's because he’s a crow that ate Crobanlock too, so I have a feeling that we’re kinda similar, and... he has lived for over 60 years, right? He might know something I don't."
At those words, Karmeut felt frustrated and asked again,
"Why? When you first found out about that crow, you didn't even have the thought or interest in meeting him."
"That’s true, but..."
Rainelle hesitated for a moment, then let out a long sigh. Looking straight into his eyes, she said,
"Hey, Karmeut, aren't you having a lot of trouble because of me?"
"...what do you mean? Trouble?"
At the sudden words, Karmeut's expression hardened even more. But Rainelle had made up her mind, so she continued,
"Karmeut had said. That I'm the next empress. ---By the way, while learning to read from Aria, I also learned a lot of things. I learned that the empress is usually a noble or princess of another country. Right? That's how they can help the emperor as well."
"...never mind that. I have no interest in other women."
That’s the truth. How can I look at a woman other than Rainelle? There will never be such a thing in the future.
But Rainelle shook her head.
"It's not because of that. ---I'm not capable enough. Even if I ate Crobanlock, I could only transform into a human. Although I signed a contract with a low-level wind spirit, I only have the power of an ordinary person or an ordinary crow..."
Having said that, Rainelle let out a long sigh.
"There are nobles who don't like me, right? Isn't that why Karmeut has a lot of work? To deal with those nobles?"
"---That's what Young Lady Gwynell told you?"
Raynell shook her head.
"She didn't tell me this. It was from my own thinking. It’s kind of similar with crows too."
She continued saying while blinking her eyes,
"It must feel like an intruder is breaking into their territory. They will not feel happy when there’s a stranger, taking a lot of good food in their area. They will want to kick that stranger out. It's like a territorial dispute, right?"
"...It's similar."
"The strong side wins the battle for territory. But I am weak. Karmeut is protecting me, who is weak."
Rainelle placed her hands on the desk and leaned her body. As she brought her head closer to him and met his gaze, Rainelle made a clear statement,
"So, I want to be helpful, at least I want to be able to protect myself."
"You don't have to worry about that, Rainelle. I appreciate your thought, but-"
"Karmeut."
Rainelle cut off Karmeut's words.
"It's hard to just be protected."
"Rainelle."
"You know, in the wild, mothers try to protect their young until the end. The child is born after much pain. It's a life that they cherish. Thinking about when it will come out while hugging it warmly in their arms, feeling the beating sound until it breaks the eggshell."
When speaking up until that part, the purple eyes sank their gaze.
"But, there are times when even a mother who cares for her young like that has to give up her baby."
"..."
"When something that cannot be controlled by one's own strength occurs, like when there is a fire, or a lot of rain, or the water rises, or when a natural enemy that the mother cannot handle comes, the mother gives up the baby. Why? As long as the mother is alive, a baby can be born anytime."
"Rainelle."
"So I don’t want to only be protected. If I’m just being protected, one day Karmeut will get tired."
"That’s not true, Rainelle. That's not going to happen, and even if it is-"
"I don’t like it."
When she said so, Karmeut's body stiffened.
"I'm not a baby bird. I can't just be being protected. If Karmeut is having a hard time because of me, it's even worse."
"But Rainelle---!!"
"If I had the strength, I could not have been kidnapped by Luwellin. Karmeut wouldn’t have been so worried!"
Her dark hair flew around as she shook her head violently.
"So, I want to meet that crow. ...He may know things I don't, so, although it’s not certain, maybe at least I'll be able to protect myself."
Rainelle’s eyes were shining more earnestly than ever when she said: “So, please…”
And the emperor was always weak against her. "---Okay, I'll ask Myrdin-nim to visit the Imperial Palace with that crow."
"Thank you, Karmeut!"
"In return, can I be there with you? There are far more unknowns than known about Crobanlock and crows."
Rainelle pondered for a moment at that, then she happily nodded her head.
"Okay."
"I'll contact Myrdin-nim, and I'll let you know when we can meet as soon as I get the reply."
Rainelle nodded. She then murmured while giving an apologetic look,
"I'm sorry, Karmeut. And thank you. I mean it."
Hearing that, Karmeut smiled. Then he planted a kiss on Rainelle’s lips, whose head was still close to him.
"---!!"
As if to savor the taste, he stuck out his tongue and licked her moist lower lip slowly. After that, he slowly pulled her away. Then he said while bending his eyes gently.
"There's no need to say sorry thank you. I'll just take the rewards."
His voice when he said “So, look forward to the night”, was low and full of desire.
***