Life of Change

I woke up wrapped in what felt like a very warm blanket. The classic unfamiliar ceiling was there; gleaming white.

I couldn't move my head, so my line of sight was somewhat limited. I could see part of what looked like paintings hanging on the walls, but other than that, there was almost nothing remarkable.

I could hear footsteps all around me, maybe two or three people. They seemed to be moving things around, but I couldn't be sure. The situation was starting to make me feel anxious as I heard people around me and couldn't see them. Also, I was having a little headache. It almost felt like a migraine that was getting worse and worse.

There was a feeling of annoyance welling up inside me. No, more than that, I felt angry, disappointed and sad.

I know it's kind of cliche, but seriously, why the hell this happened to me? Had I done something in my life to die like that? My mother was a bitch, she treated me and my sister like we didn't exist, she even almost killed her and didn't even give a shit about it. And my father wasn't much better, he didn't do anything to us directly, but he let that bitch do whatever she wanted with us and never tried to stop her.

My sister was all I cared about and all I fought for in life. I managed to pay for her schooling, she applied for a college scholarship and I was night after night helping her in any way I could so she could get it. And she did. Nadia had always been interested in sports and now she could study to be a sports therapist, just as she always dreamed.

We spent almost 5 years in complete peace, thinking we could finally live a quiet life. We even had enough time to develop hobbies. I gone to internet side, getting into video games, anime, and so on, while she spent most of the day in a gym... or church.

Yes, she became religious. She thought everything we had been through was some kind of divine plan, but now I had the answer to that question... what a load of crap.

Those years were the best of our lives. However, neither of us managed to find love. We had our partners, but they never lasted long enough. There was always some kind of jealousy because we both cared too much about each other and that caused us to have a lot of misunderstandings.

Unfortunately, that hit me pretty hard. It's not like I had those kinds of feelings for my sister, I just couldn't leave her after everything we had been through. It made me question a lot of things about other people...things that right at the moment just made the headache worse.

People say that, when you die you see your whole life before your eyes. Well, that didn't happen to me the moment I died, it's happening to me the moment I was reborn. Which makes it ironic and all the more depressing.

Do you know what's the worst thing about being incredibly angry, disappointed and depressed? Not being able to do anything about it. If I were my adult self, I'd be punching the wall with my fists, or screaming to let all my emotions out. But now? I'm a baby... I don't know how much time has been since I was born, but if I can't even move my head, it means I don't have more than a couple of days or weeks at most. I can't do anything. I just feel a huge frustration.

By the time I realized that, I was crying, with the loud wails of a normal baby. I couldn't even do anything with all the pain I felt. I would never see my sister again, the things I wanted to do in my old world I could never accomplish... That old hag is probably still alive despite what she did to me, and to top it all, my sister has to face all this by herself. Damn it... I wanted to just scream out all those emotions that were welling up in my throat. But I was unable to move forward, both metaphorically and literally.

There was no turning back now and I had no choice but to force myself to accept it. I just have to start my new life, and my new identity and do everything I can to make it a better life than the one I had before. But fuck, it was seriously frustrating.

I think I kind of understand the logic of why reincarnated people shouldn't keep the memories of their past lives. It fucking sucks to remember all the worst things that happened in your previous life and, even though you're still alive, not being able to do anything about it, not even being able to complain. And even worse when you die accidentally, or like me, murdered.

While my mind was still in that torrent of depression and frustrations, two people approached from the sides of what I thought, was my crib.

My gaze was caught by one of the figures hovering over me. A woman with a fanciful charm, her light black hair down to her shoulders, shimmered in the light of the room, making it look an almost dark shade of purple. Her warm amber eyes gave me a sweet but serious gaze.

Her porcelain skin was a clear example of the great attention and care to which she was subjected, giving the impression of being as soft as a marshmallow. Tantalizing pink lips, and above them a small round nose, which contributed to the harmony of her already beautiful features.

However, it was her ears that caught my attention the most. They were a bit elongated and pointed, complementing her ethereal appearance, which made me think I was looking at an elf out of some classic fantasy world.

I got so caught up in her appearance that it took me a second to realize that she had taken me in her arms and begun to cradle me, trying to soothe me in her embrace and soft voice. I didn't understand anything she was saying to me, but the tone and way she spoke was incredibly relaxing. Her face was held in a calm expression, with a soft, squinty-eyed smile. It was very, very beautiful.

To my surprise, that alone was enough to calm the emotional chaos. Who was this woman who, with so little, managed to do so much? I sensed a motherly love in her movements and the tone of her voice, but I didn't want to believe that such a person existed. I didn't want to have that kind of hope.

As I was cradled in the arms of the first woman, my eyes met the second pair of curious eyes.

A girl, much younger, whose light brown hair cascaded down her back, gazed at me with stunning emerald green eyes, vibrant and captivating. A small, sharp nose complemented her youthful features, along with her lips painted in shades of red, slightly thick and seductive. All these features on her face were highlighted by the rich tanned tone of her skin, witness to a long time living under the warm sun of the boundless expanses of the sea. And, like the previous one, her ears were slightly pointed, slightly more elongated, and pointing in a more upright direction. The girl was a beauty that could only be described as a daughter of the sea.

I knew that this was another world and that there were many different humanoid races. But it is really strange and fascinating for me to see people with such striking features and different from the average human I was so used to.

I was beginning to feel curious about my appearance. If the looks of both could be taken as a standard, would my eyes have the same intense color, or would I have the same pointed ears? Maybe I'm from some kind of winged race. Perhaps I would even have a tail.

It didn't take me a second since having that thought when the woman carrying me said something to the younger one, who immediately turned around and walked towards the door. And that's when I saw it... a tail and not just a tail. Wings, bat-like, coming out of her lower back. Both tail and wings are a dark purple color, almost black. The tail even ended in a heart-like shape and the wings were retracted, settling perfectly in the middle of her back, making them impossible to notice when you looked at her from the front. I could laugh at the irony of my thoughts coming true, or at the fact that I wanted to have those extra limbs.

Ignore the horns, she doesn't have them. But this is the best image I have of her.

The good news was that the actions of the woman carrying me and the surprise at the extra parts of the other girl diverted me from my negative thoughts. The bad news was that I was getting hungry. And now I knew why the maid girl left the room.

Why do I know she was a maid? Well, she was wearing a maid's uniform. It wasn't that typical provocative uniform you usually see in anime. It was a more demure one, with a slightly longer skirt and showing less skin. Although the chest area had the upper part quite uncovered, which was a real blessing for the eyes of whoever was looking at it.

Those kinds of thoughts aside, I was now starting to feel nervous for completely different reasons than before. If I was correct, the younger girl left because it was time to feed me. So, she went to get a bottle... which I doubt very much considering that, from the looks of the room and the clothes they were wearing, their level of technology wasn't right for such things. The other option I didn't like too much either. I might be a baby now, but my adult mind can't properly process this... I mean, honestly speaking, my adult self would always be happy to do "that", but this situation is, for lack of another expression, too bizarre for me. The context is different and that makes it complicated in my mind.

After a short time, while I was still in the arms of the woman with golden eyes; whose name I would love to know, the door was heard, and then I saw five different people enter the room.

Two girls at the front.

The smallest, a little girl, maybe 5 or 6 years old, had curly hair a little below her shoulders, a light reddish color. Her eyes were a deep blue, resembling the sky on a beautiful clear day. Her fair skin, with some cute freckles on her face, harmonized with her cute little upturned nose. And as expected, pointed ears. Her sleeveless, cloud-white summer dress matched her eyes, highlighting her already bright color.

This is the best I have of her. It was supposed to be a shy smile...

The girl looked like a small animal, the way she walked shyly, clinging to the skirt of the girl next to her, who was much taller.

She looked the same age as the emerald-eyed maid. Perhaps a little older. Like the smaller one, her hair was a similar color, but a deeper shade of red. It was curly, but much longer and was styled in a braid crown style.

And just when I thought everyone had stunning eyes, this girl raised the bar even higher. Two colors. Heterochromia. But not the kind everyone knows about, where both eyes are a different color. No. Her eyes were green on top and blue on the bottom. Both colors were mixed in the middle, giving it an even more impressive appearance.

Complementing those incredible eyes, her beautiful face was flawless, with skin as white as fresh snow, her small, sharp nose giving her the appearance of a serious, sophisticated girl, and her thin, pink lips made her look like a student president, capable of leading an entire school with just a glance. And of course, the pointed ears.

No, I couldn't make the eyes exactly how I wanted. It was too complicated. So for now it will be normal heterochromia. Although it is pretty close to what I had in mind about her face.

I was beginning to see a pattern here.

To complement her appearance as a refined young lady, she wore a long corset dress with dark blue lace, with large ruffles on the sides. It almost looked more like a dress for an important event than something you would wear on a day-to-day basis.

She looked directly into my face, her lips trembled slightly, and her cheeks flushed. The expression she had was so easy to interpret that it surprised me. She looked like the type who adored babies. The kind of person who goes crazy at the sight of them. I could tell with absolute certainty that she had already fallen in love with me. And that made me feel a little scared.

Ignoring the predator, I noticed the last person. A woman, maybe in her late 30s. Like the one who carried me, she had black hair, styled in a full braid that seemed to reach almost to her lower back, there was a soft violet sheen that made it look more exotic. Her skin was somewhat pale, and she looked weak, contrasting with the fact that the other two people who arrived with her, maids; easy to recognize because they wore the same uniform as the emerald-eyed girl, were helping her walk slowly to a couch near where I was.

Her eyes were a deep red, bright as lava. Her nose was sharper than the eldest girl, and her beautiful pink lips showed her maturity. Although, they looked a bit washed out, probably for the same reason that had left her looking physically weak. Despite that, she kept a smile on her face, as if all that meant nothing to her. If it weren't for that, I would say that her appearance was similar to one of those strict women you see in the old romantic stories. She reminded me a lot of the stereotypical appearance of a wicked stepmother. And obviously, she also had pointy ears. A bit more similar to the golden-eyed women.

She was a hit, giving that mommy look. The shine of her hair is different, but well, small details.

Another difference was that she wasn't dressed in the same refined style as the other two girls, she was wearing a white button-down nightgown, basically a long, simple sleeping robe, with something similar to slippers.

She was carefully helped to sit on the couch, where she let out a tired sigh as if walking from the door to the couch had drained all her energy. Then she shifted her gaze to me, giving me a happy smile. The smaller girl came over to her, hanging onto one of her arms, looking worried about the weak-looking woman. They talked about something that made her laugh a little, and then she moved towards the woman holding me and, raising her arms seemed to indicate to hand me over to her, which she did not take long to do, placing me very carefully to be cradled close to her chest.

Now that I could get a closer look at this new person, she radiated a maternal aura, far superior to the previous one. She gave off a delicious smell. There was no other word to describe it, it was like milk, honey, and freshly baked cookies. It was almost unreal. I felt strangely protected and safe. In my mind, I just wanted to curl up and sleep in her arms forever. I had no proof, just a little feeling inside me that told me that, without a doubt, this woman was my new mom.

…

…

I had a bitter feeling when I came to that conclusion. From my point of view, not much time had passed since I died, murdered at the hands of my previous mother. And now to meet the new one, who exuded an aura of a loving, serious, and protective woman, was confusing and jarring.

To be honest I didn't know how to feel about it. Needless to say, she was not that bitch from my previous life, who was incapable of even showing any feeling in her face other than an obvious dislike for me. No, there was no such thing in my new progenitor. I could see in her eyes the enormous joy she felt at seeing me, at holding me in her arms. I could feel the warmth of her body and the care and affection she held me.

I felt lost.

I was afraid that everything was going to end the same way, that she would see me with those same eyes full of resentment and rejection. But, looking into her eyes, and the feeling she radiates... it's just too hard to reject her. Everyone in the room seemed quite amused to see me in my mother's arms, and it made me feel uncomfortable and ungrateful.

There I was, having an existential crisis, and they, unaware of my depressive thoughts, were happy for the mother and her child spending quality time together. Put it this way, I feel annoyed with myself for not being able to accept that this could be different, for trying to convince myself that I shouldn't trust her for fear of getting hurt. I just wanted to be able to understand myself at the time and sort out the chaos in my mind.

Without warning, and breaking my internal struggle. The woman who was my mother unbuttoned her robe, leaving enough room to pull out her breast, which I could now tell was bigger than what those clothes let on, and she immediately pulled me close to feed me.

I didn't even have the time to react when she already put the nipple directly in my mouth. Unfortunately for my adult mind, my baby body instincts were strong enough to take full control and start feeding myself with everything I had.

…

…

…

I will reserve my concrete opinion and just say that at least it was not as bad as I was thinking from the beginning. Shameful? Of course, it was. Several pairs of eyes were watching me intently as they had smiles on their faces. To say it wasn't uncomfortable would be lying through my teeth. But in my defense, I haven’t any option. So, I'm safe?

It wasn't long before I felt full and was pulled apart. She immediately covered herself and with very smooth movements, denoting great practice, she moved me into a position where it would be easy to get the burps out of me. It feels so weird on so many levels.

I could tell she was quite experienced by the confident and smooth movements. And if it wasn't obvious already, I would say that the two redheads who came with her were her daughters, i.e. my older sisters.

When Sathalia said she would give me a new life, she really meant it.

So far everything is quite new to me. A loving mother, with two sisters, being the youngest child. And being in a better family, financially speaking, if maidservants can be considered irrefutable proof of that.

From what I can imagine, my parents must have quite a substantial amount of money if they can afford at least three maidservants...well, four if I include the golden-eyed woman. Although I can't be entirely sure about her since she doesn't wear the same clothes as the other maidservants. However, she does look somewhat similar, maybe she's the head maid? Sooner or later, I would find out. That and their names. It's kind of awkward to refer to them by a feature, even if it's a beautiful and striking one.

As I relaxed cradled in my mother's arms, the smaller redhead approached me, trying to get a better view. My mother let her satiate her curiosity by settling me a little lower. The girl said a lot of things that I, obviously, didn't understand, and even looked a little sad that I wasn't reacting to all her talk. She looked to the other side, where the older girl was, and, from the tone of her voice, asked her something. The girl thought for a moment and then answered something that made the little girl get excited and light up with a huge smile. Again, she approached me.

“Zenya, Ib shivit ale Tya. ZEN-YA”. She said those words to me while pointing to herself. She said them slowly as if she expected me to repeat them after her. My response was only confusion. Not only because I didn't understand her, but because I think she expected me to respond.

And seeing that I didn't, she looked disappointed again, pouting prettily. A few chuckles from the other women could be heard around me. I guessed they all came to the same conclusion as me, which is quite funny, that a little girl thinks a newborn can understand and respond to her when you talk. Funny enough to point out the irony that that same baby could indeed understand them. Even if it was just the context of their actions and not the words. Something that made me laugh drawing all eyes back to me.

The predatory girl had a super dangerous expression, eyes wide and wet, both hands covering her nose and mouth as if she wanted to hold back a scream of excitement. I could even see her trembling.

The smaller one got excited again, grinning from ear to ear. The head maid, had a smirk on her face, feeling proud for some reason. My mother was no different, she had a very cheerful smile and even looked relieved. She pulled me close to her face and hugged me, pressing her cheeks together with mine. And boy were they soft, so soft, and warm.

I felt her lips on my forehead, a small and sweet kiss. Then she dedicated a few words to me and smiled so sweetly that I felt a prick in my heart. For some reason, the words she used lingered in my mind. “Ibo zuliet, driki Orinthya. Anki, Ibo zuliet”

She continued to repeat them for a while, making them burn into my heart. I wanted so badly to know the language they were using. Something inside me told me those words were something I wanted to hear.

A long kissing session later, the predator came over as well.

“Sina, driki Orinthya. Ib Sarka, ib iskashivit ale, SAR-KA”

An almost exact copy of what the little girl said. Now that I have a point of comparison, and by the way she tries to highlight a certain word, I can get an idea. They are trying to tell me their names. The girl's name would be Zenya, and hers, my eldest older sister, would be Sarka.

Now, how do I let them know I understood without looking weird?

I thought and thought until a single solution came to my mind, which was to laugh gleefully and hope that would be enough.

Oh, Sarka seems to have taken too much damage, she's holding her chest as if she's having a heart attack.

Zenya approached at the moment when Sarka "dropped dead" on her knees on the floor. Curiously she didn't try to say anything, she just brought her hand carefully closer and started stroking my head, very carefully.

I must say it felt quite nice and I was surprised at how careful she was not to hurt me. Driven by the feeling, and wishing that she too had something of her own to brag about later, I put all my effort into raising my little hand and grabbing one of her fingers. For a moment Zenya stopped and looked at me in surprise, but it didn't take long for her expression to change to a happy and amused one. She seemed very excited about what I did, something that also made me smile.

*Yawn*

Seriously, a baby's energy was scarce. Even if I didn't have more than a couple of hours awake, I was already tired enough to fall asleep at any moment.

Everyone seemed to come to a silent agreement as they watched me yawn. My new sisters held hands and said goodbye to me. Zenya waved her little hand and Sarka gave me a smile and some words which, of course, I didn't understand. The only word I managed to catch with my numb senses was orintya.

My mother had also said it before. I wonder, what does it mean?

After they both left, Mother shifted my position, resting me against her chest. Slowly rocking me and using her voice to lull me to sleep. It certainly was a beautiful voice. I had already noticed it as soon as I heard it the first time, but the tone of her voice was simply exquisite.

Suddenly, she stopped cooing and began to sing. Her soft, lovely voice filled my ears with delight. I felt like I could listen to her all my life and never tire of it. A voice I will never forget. It made me feel at peace. My whole body began to relax, and tiredness began to take over me.

I think I can get used to this. To this new life, and this new family.