I Will Disappear, Grand Duke

Chapter 94



Julia tapped the bed as if saying, ‘come and lie down’.

Fernan looked at the bed she touched with her hands and looked at her again. 

 As usual, Julia had innocent, shining eyes. He stared at her.

Fernan gently cleared his throat and sat down on the edge of the bed, just as she said.

Only then did Julia lie down. 

 Soon, the two of them, lying face to face in the middle of the spacious bed, stared at each other silently.

  ‘I feel strange..…  ’

 Julia mumbled and wiggled her fingers.  She had been close to him lately, but it was the first time she lied side by side with him like this.

 Julia, who was lying on her side and holding her hands, lowered her gaze slowly without realizing it.

 Through Fernan’s slightly opened shirt, a thick raised neckline and solid muscles could be seen.

 A man’s body.  It was also the first time she had seen her husband's body so closely. His body, which was big and firm with sharp lines, was far different from that of her small and soft body.

 Julia, who had been staring blankly between his shirt for such a long time, came to her senses belatedly.

 She glanced at him again, and met Fernan's eyes straight away.

 "Ah……  ”

 Julia slightly opened her lips with embarrassment.

 She had never seen him with insidious thoughts, but for the moment she worried that he might misunderstand her.

 While Julia was thinking about making excuses, Fernan grabbed her waist and pulled her closer.

 “…!”

 When Julia opened her eyes wide in surprise, he whispered softly in the narrow distance.

 “It’s fine if you look closely.”

 At the touch that wrapped around her waist, Julia felt her face getting hot. Indeed he misunderstood her.

 Embarrassed, Julia muttered belatedly.

 “I didn’t mean to look at it with strange intentions……  ”

Fernan’s lips bent faintly as he looked at her with reddened cheeks. Then he reached out and touched her cheek, which was heated up.

 “Sleep.  Forget all your dreams.”

 Then came a soft voice.

 At that moment, Julia glanced at him again, and met his calm gaze towards her.

 Whether it was the warmth of his embrace, or the gentleness of his touch on her cheek, her hot face did not cool down easily.

 Julia struggled, pretending that she was okay, and muttered small.

 “Your Highness, go to sleep too.”

 As if Fernan was about to do that, he slowly lowered his eyes. With his hand still wrapped around her waist, Julia slowly closed her eyes. The big arms that hugged her quickly erased the cruel afterimage in her dream.

 ***

 Fernan looked at the morning sun that had risen completely through the window.

 Then he lowered his gaze and stared at Julia in his arms.

 She was sleeping, holding his collar in her hand.

 Unlike him who couldn't sleep all night, her sleepy face was calm.

 The woman in contact with him moved in her sleep.  Each time she did, her tight lips gently brushed chest.

 Fernan flinched his hand, but his expression was as calm as usual.

In fact, it was not easy for him to just look at her still last night. Every time he looked at her, he struggled hard to suppress the desire that was filling up in him.

 Back then, what he couldn't stand was the moments when Julia tried to run away from him. Because he wanted to have her even by coercion, to keep her from leaving somehow. 

 But now, a different kind of desire was filling his insides. It was a selfish desire that she would accept him with her whole heart.

  “Ummm….”

 At that moment, Julia, who was muttering a little, completely buried her face in his arms.  Then she slowly raised her long eyelashes.

 Along with her sleepy face, her hazy blue eyes eventually turned towards him.

 As if she was still not awake, Julia smiled slightly with her half-closed eyes.

 “…Your Highness."

 Julia, who called him in a subdued voice, slowly closed her eyes again.

 Her lips, moving as if they had something to say, stopped slightly gaping. Perhaps she could not overcome her sleepiness, so she fell asleep again.

 Fernan loosened his hand that was wrapped around Julia's waist and brought it to her lips.  He swept her lower lip gently with his hard fingers.

 At this moment, his hand, which caressed her lips, was filled with deep longing.

 Fernan lowered his  head slightly, and narrowed the distance as if to kiss her.  Then, just before his lips touched hers, he stopped moving, then stared at her long lashes.

He knew that if he kissed her like this, he wouldn't be able to stop himself.

 And Julia would definitely not reject him because she didn’t remember.

 Because she didn't know anything. She forgot all her hatred and anger she had toward him.

 For that reason, there was a clear line drawn for Fernan that should not be crossed.

 Crossing that line was his greed.

 Eventually, he straightened his bent body with a deep sigh.

 Then, with his hands full of strength, he just rubbed his face, feeling exhausted.

 “So, you’re saying the two slept together last night?”

 The whispers of the maids echoed from the corner at the end of the hallway.

 “Yes. In the morning, His Highness suddenly ordered me to bring the Grand Duchess’ clothes. So…  ”

 The maid, who looked around while muffling her whisper, spoke with excitement.

 “I went to the bedroom and saw the Grand Duchess was lying in His Highness’s bed.”

 The maids chattered with excitement, saying, "Isn't this the first time they slept together?”

 And those words were clearly heard by Cedric, who was standing in the hallway close by.

 Frozen, Cedric’s eyes widened.

 He stood still there until the voices of the maids completely disappeared.

 ‘how……’

 Cedric bit his lip, thinking about what he had just heard.

 ‘What the hell is the Grand Duke doing to Julia?’

 A month had passed since Julia had stayed here. In the meantime, peaceful time was passing as if nothing had happened in this castle.

The couple became friendly as if Julia had forgotten everything he had done to her, the Grand Duke was pretending to be a caring husband……

 Cedric clenched his fists tightly.  All of this now was just a script designed to deceive Julia.  From the Grand Duke to the servants, everyone deceived her.

 Taking a deep breath, Cedric slowly took his steps.

 As he continued walking along the hallway, he saw the Grand Duke talking with his subordinate in the lobby under the railing. Cedric's gaze at the scene filled with anger.  He walked down the stairs.

Fernan turned his head at the approaching sight.

 Then, seeing Cedric standing determinedly, Fernan sent away the subordinate. 

 “What’s going on?”

 The coldness in his eyes, different from when he looked at Julia, stared at Cedric.

 Not succumbing to the momentum, Cedric responded.

 “That’s what I want to ask the Grand Duke.”

 Cedric, who clenched his fists again, spoke straight away.

 “What are you doing to Julia?”

 At those words, Fernan’s eyes began to narrow gradually.  Cedric continued as he stared at him.

 “Knowing that Julia will get her memories back someday.  But why… ”

 Cedric lowered his head, unable to continue his words. Fernan looked at him calmly, then he asked coldly.

 “What do you want to say?”

 To that question, Cedric, who raised his head, answered in a broken voice.

 “I mean, you shouldn’t force Julia to stick with you.”

 “…  ”

 “You must not have forgotten all the things you did to Julia.”

Fernan’s eyes were just calm in the words that followed.

 Soon, a quiet voice covered with a veil of perseverance descended.

 “If I had intended to force Julia here, I would have killed you first.”

 “…”

 “Don’t you think so?”

 Cedric slowly relaxed his grip on his hand and looked at Fernan.

 He was right. If he really wanted to lock up Julia here, he wouldn't have let Kalosa continue to treat Julia. Especially, he wouldn’t have allowed Cedric to stay in his castle. Moreover, nowhere was safe right now with the Emperor watching.

 But in Cedric's eyes, the Grand Duke seemed to have shaken Julia’s heart. 

If this continued, she wouldn’t want to leave him even after she regained her memories.

 Cedric continued, even though he knew that the situation was inevitable.

 “Then at least, don’t deceive Julia, who knows nothing.”

 At those words, the Grand Duke, who had been standing indifferent the whole time, muttered accordingly.

 “……  deceive…" 

 A voice mixed with laughter followed.

 “Yes, I guess so.”

 By deceiving Julia and pretending to be her good husband, this must be a clear deception.

 However, such a relationship had a definite end.  He was the one who knew it better than anyone.

  “The moment her memories return, Julia will leave me anyway.” (Fernan)

 “….”

 “So, until then…  I just want Julia to be happy." (Fernan)

 Cedric looked into his eyes as he muttered in silence.  His eyes were filled with unfathomable complex emotions.

 At this moment, Cedric could feel it.  The Grand Duke also thought about the end of their relationship and was anxious about every moment with her.

 Cedric lowered his gaze and gradually released the strength from his clenched hands.  He couldn't say anything more.

 Because he could see that this strong man in front of him was already fighting with enough painful emotions.


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