Futile Love

Chapter 50: Chapter 50

In the end Kyosul leaned forward and asked her again out of strong curiosity.

“Please tell me…..”

Sassi’s eyes trembled from side to side.

“Well, I don’t have anything particular to say…”

Apparently Sassi didn’t want to go into details. Nonetheless, it looked as if she didn’t want to hide anything to Kyosul but at the same time she seemed agonized over whether it was right to tell her everything down to the last detail.

“Sassi, is it something that I should not know?”

“Well, I can let you know about it, but I don’t necessarily have to tell you, either. I’m just afraid if I tell you, you might have prejudice against her when you are now increasing exchanges with her.”

“It looks like there are some bad rumors about Heyjin, right?”

Kyosul tried to make an educated guess when Sassi hesitated. As expected, Sassi nodded, putting on a sour face.

“Do you believe that bad rumor?”

“Nope. There are so many groundless rumors getting around in the palace. You might run into big trouble if you don’t filter them out,” said Sassi, waving her hand.

“In fact, I’m quick-witted enough to filter out wild rumors. Do you think I’m foolish enough to believe every rumor without ascertaining its truth?”

“Of course, I know you are not. I know how smart and kind-hearted our Crown Princess is. In fact I just feel reluctant to say about some bad rumors about others.”

“Then, please tell me. What if I make a mistake to Princess Heyjin without knowing anything about her rumors?”

Kyosul’s point made sense. After all, Sassi said in a low voice, “The fact is we concubines keep our distance from her.”

“Why? Did she make any wrongdoing?” she asked in surprise.

Her impression of Heyjin was that she was exotic but kind. She didn’t look like a woman who could incur others’ hatred, so Kyosul couldn’t believe her.

“When she entered the palace, she went to see many people here, and she went to the trouble of coming to the tea parties or chatting meetings first. I once reminded her that she had better be careful. But she had an accident, after all.”

“Accident?”

“At first we thought it was a coincidence. When it was repeated several times, there were some rumors that she laid a curse on people.”

“Bad spell?”

The source of such bad rumors was simply groundless. Kyosul seemed pretty agonized whether she could burst into laughter or nod seriously at the moment. As there was apparent angst in her face, Sassi smiled at her first and said, “I think they’re very scared about deceptive spell. How foolish rumors they are!”

Sassi asked if she was happy to see Heyjin. Kyosul thought of Ruhae.

Biting her lip, she smiled at Sassi and said, “Yes, I was happy. It’s pleasant to talk to her.”

“If you feel happy about it, I think your association with her is good.”

Do you really think so? Of course, I wish I were happy when I see her, but you can’t say it’s necessarily a good association unless you know who the other party is.

Sassi comforted her without knowing her deep angst and said kindly, “As you’re very sociable, I think you can be great friends.”

“Thanks.”

Kyosul lifted her teacup and turned her eyes away from her. Lost in thought, she didn’t feel the heat of the tea when she drank it. Her fingertips were cold.

***

He walked with light steps towards the North Palace. Ruhae originally saw it as a burden to give prenatal education to Prince Binsung’s wife, but he couldn’t be happier now. He entered her residence with more robust steps than ever. While he was walking toward Princess Heyjin’s residence, he stopped suddenly. He saw a court lady pacing up and down in front of the narrow gate leading to her house, stomping her feet. Seeing him approaching her, she turned around quickly.

“Wait a moment…” he approached the gate, calling her. She stood motionless at his call.”You dropped this ….”

He bent down to pick up the small pouch on the ground. It looked like a pouch containing incense.

He picked it up and gave it to her. She received it with both hands, lowering her head. As she was so nervous, she couldn’t even look at him and her hands trembled.

“I’m sorry, Your Highness.”

“You don’t have to be scared. I am not going to scold you.”

“Oh, I see. If you don’t mind, I want to leave now.”

Then she hastily turned and bowed to him. She quickly disappeared into the narrow gate through which the court ladies of the North Palace passed.

“She seemed to be pretty scared.”

With a quick smile, he turned around. Checking out the location of the sun, he guessed the time. It was his great happiness these days to go to the North Palace on the pretext of giving Princess Heyjin’s prenatal education and bump into Kyosul. In great excitement, he walked through the middle gate, but there was someone outside the gate, watching him and the court lady.

It was sunny in the North Palace. Strangely enough, whenever she stepped into the palace, Kyosul felt unusually good about the sky there.

Oddly enough, when she entered the North Palace, she felt even the scorching sun was warm. She felt the summer air that had become sticky was refreshing there. Perhaps it was because of the tasseled strings of straw surrounding the North Palace to support Heyjin’s approaching due date. The strings that surrounded all the doors of the palace to prevent the arrival of evil spirits seemed to drive out even the summer heat.

Perhaps she felt so because the palace was located at the northern end of the spacious Imperial Palace. Those kinds of idle excuses came to her mind whenever she went there to see Princess Heyjin.

In fact, she had to make excuses like that. She had to deceive herself every day that she was going there for other reasons than the truth. Every day, she created one more reason why she liked the North Palace.

“I feel comfortable when I sit face to face to you, Princess Heyjin,” Kyosul took pains to explain.

She already lifted the teacup six times and put it to her mouth and then put it down without sipping.

She also mentioned often that Heyjin was comfortable to be around.

As if she felt awkward, Kyosul sipped the tea a bit.

Smiling, Heyjin also sipped the tea and said, “I am sorry and thankful that you have come such a long way to see me.”

“You’re welcome. I’m coming here with a light heart all the time because I take great delight in spending time with you here.”

“Thanks for telling me so, Your Highness.”

Heyjin’s dreamy eyes often stared into the air. Initially out of curiosity Kyosul turned her eyes to the place where Heyjin fixed her eyes, but there was nothing particular where her gaze landed. Kyosul felt this kind of weird stare might have brought about some wild rumors about Heyjin among the court ladies. Heyjin seemed to try to look for something surreal to distract from her fear, and the court ladies might have found fault with her for that out of fear.

That’s not right. Kyosul narrowed her eyes. Princess Heyjin is such a nice and good woman.

Kyosul didn’t accept the rumors she heard from Sassi every day. Heyjin was always nice and cautious even though she was sometimes weird.

“By the way, I met Prince Binsung on my way back. It looks like he is coming to see you every day. Whenever I come here, I think I always bump into him,” said Kyosul.

“Yes, he always comes to see me when he is done with his official duties of the day. Of course, he is coming to see my baby. Hoho,” Heyjin said, stroking her swollen belly.

Heyjin sometimes looked like a woman from another world, but when she talked about Prince Binsung or stroked her belly, she turned into a woman that Kyosul was quite familiar with.

“You really look happy. I envy you,” Kyosul said sincerely.

Kyosul thought Binsung and Heyjin were the happiest among the people that she came to know in the palace, and she envied them more than anybody else.

In her eyes, the couple shared a deep love and took care of each other so dearly.

When she thought of that, Kyosul was suddenly choked up with tears. She changed the topic suddenly for fear Heyjin might catch her shedding tears.

“Please tell me why you like Prince Binsung so much,” Kyosul said, pulling her knees close to her.

When Kyosul leaned forward with glittering eyes, Heyjin blushed.

As her dark yellow face took on a glow, it was quite attractive.

Kyosul felt Prince Binsung must have fallen in love with her because of her attractive features.

“Prince Binsung….” After hesitating a bit, she answered in a thin voice like the crying of a crow-tit. “Isn’t he cute?”

“Cute?”

Kyosul looked around when she said that. How could she use that inordinate expression ‘cute’? Kyosul thought such an expression was reserved for children.