Warship’s Mania

This new room was larger with a higher domed ceiling decorated in my old chromatic friends: black and gold. The walls, though, had the same wood with nacreous inlay as the previous room, portraying human figures, some of which I imagined could be astronauts. A group of the pale skinned people sitting on cushions watched us, their gazes piercing through me. Velteragni stepped onto a round, slightly raised plateau with at the center a stool like the ones most of my bodies were seated except more ornate. I uneasily followed, letting her shield me from those demanding eyes. In the middle of the onlookers stood the two officers carrying the cabinet. With perfectly practiced steps they walked over to the front of the plateau where they opened the cabinet. In the same cold and precise manner as the two officers, Velteragni took the purported spear and held it out towards me. With my eyes nervously flitting about I got a better look of the domed ceiling: at the center was the twelve petaled sun again on a black background that radiated out in four large shapes accompanied by eight smaller ones, all of them decorated with symbols. This was heraldry and I immediately knew it was depicted somewhere on my body. Wait... Where!? Where on any of my bodies is there enough space for that!?

Somewhere an avatar shook off my confusion, the distraction affording me enough courage to unclench my prime avatar's fists. Stiffly, I took the spear with all six of my hands. Something connected in my mind: there was some kind of mechanism in this thing. Without warning the two officers started chanting a prayer with the rest of the room following suit. I flinched and with that accidentally activated Hekkamuk's mechanism. Its spear head ignited. Literally. The mechanism inside had been a hard light projector. Sharp metallic edges gleamed inside pale nebulous flame, and it was all made of light. Too damn cool!

"Sounds like they're almost done in there," Trurl said to the me next to him, "You can join the crew after all that nonsense. As I'm not an anthropologist I can't tell you why exactly, but they consider it a bad omen if your prime avatar—that is the you with six arms if, as I'm sure, you hadn't figured out—entered the command center after one of your secondaries—the ones with just two arms, obviously." I made it a point to ignore him and directed my instinctive need to to scowl at him to a random secondary elsewhere, which spooked a woman in front of me there trying to sneak back in after a quick visit to the facilities. Suppressing the urge to apologize because I had no idea if that was the right action to take, I instead smiled awkwardly at her. She returned the awkwardness and bowed politely before returning to her cushion. Enlisted Nandilukka had taken all the anti anxiety tea blend from the deck's apothecary which I surmised had surely caused her to visit the head a lot. I was feeling the need to help her with these problems at the same time as I pondered why I had access to this woman's medical history and if I really wanted to know it. Perhaps my purpose here was medical? Was it okay for me to pry into private matters in that case?

Velteragni left me too little time to ruminate through one simple act that pulled my attention completely towards her: she closed her hand around Hekkamuk's spearhead. I was startled by a strong feeling of anticipation as the sharp edges cut her skin and then... There it was. The trickle of red accompanied by a distinctive stinging metallic scent. I noticed I already had one of my left hands on her wrist. When she let go I swiftly guided her hand to my mouth to lap it all up before it coagulated. It was rich, warm and reassuring. She was healthy and would continue to be healthy. I delighted in the iron taste, the stickiness that dissolved upon mixing with my saliva, how it filled my throat my with a buzzing warmth. "Partake in my blood," said she, "That you may know it from our enemy's. Return your love to all those who love you and to all those who will love you, and be savage to those who with the intent of their very souls perpetuate the mechanisms of oppression and suffering, for they are the hands of the King of Sorrow." I traced the cuts with my tongue. So deep... She had flinched so little. Strong and admirable... I softly bit in a desire for more but couldn't dare to hurt her despite the sharp implements of my mouth that would make it so easy to draw out more of that warmth. That warmth and love. Her warmth within me. Her love. And yet I began to taste a sadness. Reading the semi-intelligent nano particle mesh within—the technoma—gave me a clearer picture of her history. Something had happened in the past. Something distressing. I steered my curiosity away from this matter, distracted by the more pressing such as the fact that I had just drank blood and loved it.

I backed away from her unblooded hand and blinked knowing my response. "I will."

Trurl pulled me out of my reverie. "Good job. The next part is so easy I nearly feel you could not screw it up. You simply have to eat and drink along with the crew, but start with the coffee first and then the chocolate, after that everything else is fair game, but do not skip the beef stew. Another one of those naval superstitions, I'm afraid. Try to guess what the secret ingredient is. Yes, this is a party, by the way. Go and do the things you should do at a party." I started for the bulkhead as an official looking attendant pulled it open. Eat and drink? It made me glad I was capable of consuming something other than blood.

As soon as my secondaries entered all three of me there were given deep small cups containing a steaming dark liquid with an all-too-familiar smell. Good to know even in the far flung future people still appreciated a good cup of joe. My prime body and one of the secondaries drank simultaneously, a strange sensation to be startled by such strong bitterness twice over at the same time but still as one person. I supposed I would get used to it, and maybe I already was in a way. No milk or sugar had been added to the drink, but Becca had lived on instant coffee without even so much a grain of sugar or drop of cream for months on end and I remembered it all impossibly vividly. Recollection beyond human capability. At what point does memory become a recording? I wondered. Whatever the case, this was the best damn coffee I had ever had and by far the strongest.

Velteragni smiled at me and I did likewise. "Good, isn't it?" I nodded and she laughed quietly. "You can be proud of your own coffee." That last comment confused me but I didn't dare press her on it.

Next was the chocolate which came in tapered cubes. It looked very dark and I steeled myself (myselves?) as I took the plunge. Definitely very dark and very very bitter, not the kind of chocolate I knew from my ancient memories. Low key distress could be read from Velteragni's face. "Maybe chocolate isn't for you," she said.

No. In my memories I adored chocolate. I would not allow it to become something I hated in this new life. "I'm savoring it," I said as my bodies faked enough body heat to let the cubes melt on my tongues with some help from whatever solvents were in my saliva. It was easier that way for me to ingest it.

By now it was clear the ritual was over. Everyone relaxed as more personnel came in carrying trays of food, a susurration of casual conversation rising all around. Looking in Trurl's direction I found him talking to some officers. "I foresee no problems. Most of the systems are running autonomously for now but the Ship will finish enmeshing in a few moments." So he was capable of holding down his sarcasm?

All over the Ship people had begun to celebrate and feast. All in all I had 60 points of view on this event, with none more having been added in the last minute or so. Was I done getting connected? I supposed I was and headed for the food. Not that I was hungry, but as the heir of Rebecca-Ann Kendarr's memories and personality I couldn't say no to a free meal, and it was all-you-can-eat I was pretty sure. My prime body got a bowl of what looked like beef stew with a dark sauce while I let my secondaries go straight for the pastries. There were still cows in the future, yes. Not only was there a beef stew but two of the attendants that came in earlier were busy mounting a skull with four twisting horns on the wall. I looked from my bowl to the skull, connected the dots and wondered how quickly these future people could clean the bones left over from their ritual offerings.

In an unguarded moment I had swallowed down a small flat cake, spongy and decorated with crushed nuts. Were those pecans I tasted? The taste was very similar. Before I could ponder more I caught someone waving a rifle, trying desperately, it seemed, to get my attention. I was surprised to see a girl like me: robotic in black and gold, with horns jutting from her forehead enspiraled by thick bands of filigreed gold, her scruffy looking hair had been done up in a single ponytail that bounced wildly with her movements. My instance that had spotted her walked over, munching on tiny dime-sized cookies. She was taller than me and slightly older in appearance than I was, and upon closer inspection I saw that the rifle she was holding was in fact an ornate crossbow.

"Oi~!" Dear Lord, she had those teeth too. "Why didn't you accept our invitation?"

I blinked and looked about the feasting crowd. "I'm here now, right?"

"Huh?" She looked nonplussed.

At the same time I had returned to the captain with my primary body. "Are you enjoying the feast?" she asked. "There isn't as much coffee and chocolate as there should be because of the limited time we have, but it wouldn't be a proper launch ceremony if we didn't have a proper feast." So that's what it was.

"Well," I said, feeling I could confide in her, "Trurl didn't tell me much, so I'm glad I hadn't screwed up earlier and can relax now." I laughed just a little awkwardly. "I don't even know the Ship's name."

Her eyes grew wide and she froze for just a moment when I said that and brought back her smile, tinged with a hint of concern. "Vulilognan Shissurna. The name of the Ship is Vulilognan Shissurna."

I didn't understand. "That's my name."

She grabbed one of my unoccupied hands with both of hers and subtly leaned in. I blinked up at her. "It is your name." Body warm fingers squeezed room temperature metal. "My dear... You are the Ship."

"But I don't—" Holographic lights encircled my head. Enmeshing complete.

My being suddenly expanded and I couldn't stop it this time. I had to rush out into a self greater than and including all my avatars. The dream that was there the whole time entangled with the multi bodied sensation I thought was my reality. I connected with everything into this Greater Self. Shields, sensor arrays, weapon systems, engines... All those and more were no longer denied to me. I felt I could finally reach out to the universe: to sense it, or send out hammer blows to those who dared raise their weapons against me and my crew. The truth, so unavoidable, had come to me:

I was the Ship.