Tunnel Rat Volume 1 will be be STUBBING on NOV. 1st!

Four figures traversed the under-realms far beneath Shadowport. Two were dwarven Engineers in elaborate sets of powered armor. At one time, the armor had been made to preserve the lives of the older dwarves far past their normal life span. Rejuvenated and their lifespans extended, they only wore the armor in perilous situations or dangerous experiments. Traveling through caves inhabited by hungry creatures certainly counted as perilous.

They were enjoying the trip and worried about little at this point because of the large fellow guarding the rear. Dr. Harold Earthtongue, a trollish expert on all things fungi and known to his friends as Harry was a thirty-foot-tall mountain of troll and mushroom, the result of eating the heartshroom of a giant myconian. The transformation gave him the opportunity to study fungi in the caves without worrying about predators. He was currently at the top of the pyramid. Harry followed along behind the engineers as they navigated through the mushroom caverns to his old home.

The fourth member of the party was Milo. Until recently he'd been a scavenger and prospector in the depths until he discovered the lost station of the Deep Rock Engineers Guild. The dwarves were still debating if Milo finding them was a good or bad thing. The station was a shambles with over 90% of it destroyed. But at the same time, the entire crew of dwarves were younger and thinking straight for the first time in centuries. Most of the grumbles came from the older dwarves mourning the loss of all of their whiskey which Milo had somehow used to kill a giant elemental snake, a gargantuan pudding creature, an ancient myconian, and destroy the station. Dwarves take the loss of whiskey seriously. Which was part of the reason for the expedition to mark out a pathway to the uptop and reestablish contact with the surface world.

As they traveled, Two-screws and Throttlecog marked the path for other dwarves to follow and commented on how the rock lay, giving Harry directions for his tunneling efforts. Milo hadn't taken an easy route down through the caves and the labyrinth of mines. With his climbing ability and were-rat claws he could easily scamper up sheer surfaces and through small tunnels that Harry couldn't fit through nor the dwarves traverse. After a little work they had created a system where Milo scouted out the next piece of the route, reported to the dwarves who marked it down on the maps, and Harry would do the heavy lifting of debris and boulders as the dwarves mined with picks or blew apart stubborn rocks with cataclysmite.

Several times Milo caught movement out of his eye and noticed that they were being followed by a gaggle of small myconians who immediately sunk down into the earth and pretended to be mushrooms if anyone noticed them. Rather than any sort of threat, Milo was reminded of a video he had seen of a mother duck and her ducklings.

By the end of the first day, and several hours of work spent moving earth and tunneling through rock, they arrived at Harry's old home. Several caves opened onto a huge central area where he farmed mushrooms for food and research purposes. The huge troll sat in the center of his mushroom beds, too big to move around much. "I believe this is as far as I will go today, Milo. You have places to be, and the tunnels to the uptop are much too tight for me. I will expand them in time, but that is time you don't have. However, before you press on, please go to my library and find the book sitting on the small table. And bring the satchel next to it as well."

Milo found the book easily. It was leather-bound and only an inch thick. In large lettering across the cover was the title. 'Molds and spores used in the art of making cheese'. Opening the book Milo saw that Harry had written chapters on how to use myconic potions to simulate the rennet used in cheese making, along with how both mushroom spores and molds were used to ferment the curds and create the rind on different types of cheeses. The knowledge was far beyond his meager cheese-making skills. He brought both the book and the satchel out to Harry.

"Those are for you, Milo. As I began my research into your favorite food, I found quite a bit of cross-over into my normal fields of study. The satchel contains samples of the mold cultures and spores of the mushrooms I talked about in my book. I hope it will all be useful to you."

Milo expressed his gratitude, but Harry waved it aside. "You saved me from fading away. I'm just glad I finished that book before my latest transformation. These hands don't hold a pen well. It will take me some time to reduce myself back to something reasonable. But this stature does make clearing a pathway through the cave network much easier. Take my gifts with the thanks of an old troll."

The dwarves took off their armor and began a series of stretches and exercises. Throttlecog needed to work out to regain the muscles he'd lost to old age. Two-Screws wasn't as old, but he hadn't looked after himself for the last few hundred years. It came with being a half-mechanical zombie until recently. With typical dwarven willpower and competitive streaks a mile wide, exercised until Throttlecog collapsed on the ground. Two-Screws was standing on shaking legs and had a mighty thirst, "Harry, trolls wouldn't happen to drink beer, would they?"

"Of course they do! Why, I think that most trolls love beer more than dwarves. The earthy taste and the smell as the mash rots and ferments are exquisite."

Both dwarves were suddenly invigorated and standing up. "You have beer then?"

"Oh, no. Getting deliveries down here is nearly impossible. I content myself with a traditional trollish beverage called Trogdorf. It's made from roasted mushrooms and fermented cave sprouts. After the mash sits for a few months a quick boil and sieving create a delightfully refreshing ale. I prefer mine put in a cask for a few years to further ferment and strengthen the taste."

"And do you happen to have some of this Trogdorf around?"

"Of course. I like making it and experimenting with flavors more than drinking it. A few dozen barrels are aging in the last cave past the porcini beds. Please, help yourselves."

The dwarves found they had the energy to race to the cave and each emerged with a small cask of beer. Harry pointed them to his kitchen and some large earthenware mugs. Soon the sound of two old dwarves singing and drinking could be heard throughout the caves. Several hungry Cave-Mantis and a Stone Lurker left their lairs and relocated to quieter caves. Milo checked on them two hours later and found them passed out and snoring with smiles on their faces.

They weren't smiling the next day. Holding their heads, they complained of strange dreams and pounding headaches. Milo, never having drunk any alcohol had no way of judging their distress, but anything that could make two dwarves complain of hangovers was something to be avoided. Harry gave Milo instructions for a restorative potion that he brewed in Harry's laboratory. The dwarves complained of the taste, but it eased their distress. Once back in armor, they were ready to begin the climb up to Shadowport.

Eager to reach the top, with the incentive of real beer, the engineers moved upwards. Milo knew the way by heart at this point. The dwarves were slower than he was at climbing through the caves, but not by much. Dwarves were at home underground and spelunking through caverns was a skill ingrained into their heritage. Added to that was the armored suits they wore. Milo knew they weren't just armor. He'd seen both dwarves move rocks much heavier than they should have been able to lift. Some sort of strength enchantment or mechanical system was used in their construction.

Milo asked about the suits but got little in the way of explanation. Throttlecog said the technology to make them was referred to as 'magitech'. It was something of an art form with each engineer designing his suit in their own style. Two-Screws was wearing a borrowed suit, having been a junior engineer only recently promoted. The Chief Engineer had insisted he wear one for the journey.

"I'd tell you a little bit about magitech, but for everything I explained you'd have seven more questions, and seven times seven questions when I answered the first seven. Easier to give you a few dozen books to read when we get back."

Milo didn't like that answer. "What about just explaining the use of the small power crystals I see in all of the machinery?"

Two-Screws laughed. "Might as well start educating him while we climb. He'll just find something else to ask questions about."

"Fine, but only if you promise to not tell anyone about this morning. I've never had a hangover like that before."

They were halfway up and Milo was asking about what type of mana-conductive wire you would use in a thermal-inducer when the first tremor hit. They just climbed up a fifty-foot cliff, aided by the pitons Milo had driven into the rock. A vertical crack ran down the cliff and the pitons popped loose like buttons on your fat uncle's vest at Thanksgiving. Throttlecog fell but Two-Screws caught the rope he'd been holding but was skidding toward the edge himself. Milo's tail hooked to Two-Screws toolbelt and he grabbed ahold of the rock with his claws. Alta-Viator's gift to him let him dig into the hard rock like it was soft earth, and the dwarves quit sliding. A minute later all three sat and rested as the tremor faded.

"Damn, we haven't had a big one like that in years."

Milo was curious. He knew the area was called 'Shakeytown' but had assumed it was because the old mines had been driven through soft stone that caved in easily. "How often do you have earthquakes?"

Throttlecog thought back to before the disaster that destroyed the old dwarven city. "Never, in the before-times. Then the big one picked everything up and shook us around. We didn't know that the whole damned city got hit by some magical explosion. It was a couple of decades before someone made it through the collapsed tunnels and back. Aftershocks were common as things settled downward and the seas adjusted to a new coastline. Now we get something like that every decade or two."

Eventually, they were climbing up the last incline to the city. The long slope was littered with loose rock making the climb treacherous. Milo tied a line around a huge outcropping at the top to aid the dwarves in walking up the slope. When they were halfway up the slope, another tremor shook the caverns. Loose rocks tumbled down and Milo was horrified to see the outcropping at the top start to tip as the rocks holding it in place slipped. Throttlecog pushed Two-Screws as hard as he could and knocked both of them to opposite sides of the incline. The tumbling stone passed over where they stood, taking their rope with it.

Two-Screws looked at his friend, "Not sure about you, but I think my pride can handle crawling the rest of the way up."

"Yup, after you, and if you roll back down, don't expect me to catch you."

They finally made it up the last incline and into the massive cavern under the city that had been carved out by decades of miners in search of ore and gems. Humans, halflings and dwarves had been at work here for generations, carving out the rock, and driving tunnels in all directions. Giant pillars of stone had been left to support the ceiling as the main cavern got bigger and bigger and the walk to the current mines got longer and longer. Several times one group or another suggested carving the pillars and walls and turning the area into a magnificent underground city. But since there was no money in that, and hence no one to pay the stonemasons, the plans always fell through.

Milo had been through this area several times and was surprised to see how many miners were clustered in this area by the caves that led downward. Three coal fires were burning supplying light for those humans or halflings without good dark vision. Nearly fifty miners were here, hastily trying to repair makeshift barriers of stone, wood, and overturned ore carts. It looked more like a small camp of soldiers preparing for the assault of an enemy. And as it turned out, that’s what it was.

"Get ready, the damn things are coming again!" The speaker was a dwarf standing atop two crates, peering into the gloom. The sound of heavy footsteps could be heard. The engineers pushed forward, curious what was going on, and who the miners were fighting.

Milo set down his pack and brought out his weapon. "Who's coming? What's attacking you?"

The dwarf looked down at him, half sneering and half confused. "Where the hell did you come from? You know what, doesn't matter. Get on the line and do your best to chip away at them. We've got four of the smaller ones lurking around out there. If that's all there is, we have a chance, so swing hard."

Throttlecog moved forward, followed by Two-Screws. The dwarf on the crates got quiet and his eyes bugged out.

Throttlecogs deep laugh echoed in the cavern. "Oh, we can hit pretty damn hard, can't we brother?" He pulled the large wrench off his back, and spun a screw on the handle, extending the weapon to its full six-foot in length.

Two-Screws held out his metallic hands which seemed to glow and then were replaced by spinning metal augers that started to whine and growl as their speed picked up. "Oh, that we can brother. Now you-" He pointed at the dwarf on the lookout. "Answer Engineer Milo's question. What the hell is it we’re fighting?"

Wisely deciding that it couldn't hurt to be polite, the dwarf took off his hat and bowed to the three of them. "Ah, sorry, I got a little worked up what with all the fighting. It's Stone Lurkers, sir. Dozens of the immature ones. The mama keeps hatching more out and sending them in waves."

Someone yelled, "Here they come!" Milo could see four of the monsters heading slowly towards the barriers. They were barely half the size of the ones he had fought before, let alone the monster called Bone Crusher.

Shadowblight was humming in his hand. He was nearly out of cheese and these things were between him and some tasty, tasty wheels of cheddar. The dwarves and humans nearby stepped backward as the little human suddenly changed. Heavy bone claws appeared on his lower legs and forearms. A ghostly tail whipped out behind him. He spun an obviously enchanted weapon in circles as if limbering up. A feral grin appeared on his face as he turned to the other engineers.

"Race You!"

Throttlecog and Two-Screws cursed as Milo leaped over the barrier and ran at the Stone Lurkers.

"Damn your hide! You better share!" Two dwarven Engineers in magitech battle armor leaped the barriers, vainly trying to catch the scampering rat who was racing at the attacking monsters.