To Love, Once Again

——-
3 years ago, before Sera's return

After one of his battles with the Azarks, Lucien sits in a dark room, the light of flickering magic stones around him.

Books, well-cared for from the way each one lines the walls in a neat fashion, each cover and lettering on the title pristine and crisp, like they were still freshly made, surround him on all sides.

There's a table in the center of the room, tomes opened displaying historical pictographs and stories in a lyrical scripts, and among them Lucien sits, baring his chest.

There was no major injury from the battle. But the sharp iron scent of blood hung heavy in the air, nonetheless. It came from the deep cuts on his arms and chest, from which blood was gathered with a silver spoon in crystal containers.

"Are you sure you want me to do this?" The Elder asks, a question in his tremulous voice.

"Do it" They were already halfway through the process. Lucien didn't care about what kind of his pain his body was about to go through. Everyday, the pain his heart felt being separated from Sera was eating away at him.

"If this will bring her back, I'm willing to give anything"

"Understood"

There's a crackling fire in the fireplace, licking up the iron poker that sits in it, turning red, then yellow with the bright heat of the fire.

"I'll have to stop your wounds with heat, since my mana would contaminate your blood for the next experiments if I healed you with magic. "

The Elder was no healer either, so he was not knowledgeable on how to sew up wounds like Sera taught, which was the only other possible way to heal the deep cuts. The option of bringing in another healer was impossible, when these experiments had to remain a secret.

Lucien hisses as the sharp heat of the iron poke presses against his skin, sealing the deep cut so that it wouldn't bleed out.

The smell of sizzling, burning flesh fills the air.

Summoning magic always required royal blood. To make the one-way ticket that could only happen twice, work a third time, the Elder, with all his knowledge, would have to study and experiment until he got everything right.

Using the fresh blood Lucien provided.
——-

" No" shaking her head, Sera rejects Lucien's proposal.

Lucien doesn't look surprised. This was something he expected. Barely any parts of the plan were working as Icaros had promised it would. And he'd made Sera angry.

But he feels relieved to be able to finally share part of the heavy load off his chest.

Icaros looks up and pleads with Sera,

"Miss Sera, please, let me explain. The King has done so much for you so that-"

"I'm not playing these games anymore, Icaros. Lucien wanting to marry me? Then why did he make me his mistress?! Why won't he let me see my son!"

Nodding, Lucien tries to explain:
"-everyone out!" Icaros interrupts him, clearing the room.

Pointing to the 3 noblemen who remained in the room, who had seen everything happen from start to finish,

"Take them to the secret location"

"Yes Captain"

The knights hurl the full grown noblemen, weaker than the knights who are built for fighting are, and unable to put up a proper fight, over their shoulders, and run off.

"Sire, before you speak with Miss Sera, what shall we do with these other ladies?"

The long red cloak flaps behind him as Icaros gestures to the two women who look a mess now with tears and makeup smudged over their faces, screaming in abject terror until other knights enter the room and silence them with a rag in the mouth.

"Get rid of all evidence of what happened here for now. Take them to the dungeons"

Waving his hand behind him, Lucien gives his decision.

"Yes, your Majesty."

"Icaros." The King calls to him once more, as the Captain ushers everyone out of the room.

"Yes, your Majesty?"

"From now on, we do things my way."

"....understood"

The door shuts behind the entourage with a soft click.

It's only Sera and Lucien in the room now. Though it feels like a tornado had ripped through this room, only the sight of the daggers, sunk in to the hilt into the wood door bely any sort of violence.

Knock knock.

"I've returned with a dress and a comb as requested, Sire"

Striding to the door, Lucien brings in the pink dress and silver comb that doesn't match at all with the burly knights hand that pokes in, and closes the door again.

Wrapping her arms around herself, Sera watches him warily.

"Explain yourself." She utters with finality.

Trying to appear as less threatening as possible, Lucien kneels on the ground again, their views closer to each other so that Sera won't have to crane her neck up at him.

Taking both her dainty hands in his own, he chooses each word carefully,

"During the war, we met and spent every night together..I could come to you between training, and watch you and touch you, and help you as you worked.." Like a feather, so lightly Sera wouldn't have felt it unless she saw him do it, he traces the curve of her cheek.

"and when you became my Queen, we lost it all. The nobles wouldn't let me sleep in the same room as you, even see you, unless it was part of the duty for the day.."

Remembering those days, Sera knows that Lucien speaks the truth. She'd been an obedient Queen then, moving as the nobles and traditions asked of her, heart growing away from Lucien as they seemed to lose contact.

Her only solace then was speaking to her rounded belly, pregnant with Leo, wishing she could see his father instead of doing needlework with the ladies.

"I made you my mistress, so that we could spend more time together" Sera stares at his earnest eyes, the way his expression seems so clear now. Seems like to Lucien, it was as simple as that. He hadn't thought about the way it would make her feel. They way it would hurt her.

"What about the marriage then?"

"After you left, I'd lost my focus, and in that time, the nobles, they'd been making the people suffer, raising the taxes so high..I was so foolish..so, so foolish" Rubbing a hand over his face, Lucien pauses, the dark shadow of seeing the evil humanity can do crossing over his face.

"I was going to marry you. The reason it was kept a secret was to draw out every thieving noble together in one place for one good spring cleaning. If they knew I was going to marry you again, they wouldn't have come. Icaros purposely had rumors spread of a foreign princess or some other noblewoman...Though that backfired, once that whole wedding ended, I wanted to woo you in earnest..."

"And the Elder and Icaros, they'd insisted I keep it a secret from you, for the sake of the plan.."

Sera could see what had happened now. Lucien would never have thought up a plan like that. It was more Lucien's style to go after each noble, sword in hand, and make them pay.

Stupid Icaros with his stupid plans. They'd wasted so much time because of him.

"What about our son?"

"......."

"Lucien?"

"....I have to tell you about a condition I have.." Resigning himself to his fate, like a man facing the guillotine, he decides to bare it all. Would Sera throw him away too, knowing he was a broken being?

"When I get angry, I lose my control..I almost killed one of my own men because of that! What if I do it again and kill our son!? He was the only precious thing I had left after you left! I couldn't risk that"

For the first time ever, Sera sees tears running out of Lucien's eyes, gazing at her with a broken clarity. The light in his eyes was dimming, losing hope, hope for love.

Oh no. No no no no.

While Lucien's mother had a habit of showing off her treasures, Lucien had grown to do the exact opposite.

Golden buttons from his father's coat. A glossy purple stone he'd found in a riverbank. The vibrant feather of a kingfisher.

As a child, anything that he thought was beautiful or precious, he would bring to his mother, who would like it at first, but then always eventually toss it away when she lost her interest.

Even if he didn't bring it to his mother, she would find him eventually, hearing from one servant or noblewoman about the new treasure that Lucien had found.

It had taught Lucien a valuable lesson.

Hide and protect what was most precious to him, away from any eyes that would take it away from him. Keep the treasures close enough to watch over, but never let others know how much it meant to him.

"I wanted to protect our son.."

Lucien didn't want his small son to live a life like he did. Leo should be free to do whatever he wanted.

If their son had no name, or description , it would be harder for assassins to know exactly which young child in the tightly guarded castle was the actual prince.

As a King, Lucien was used to fighting for his life, not just on the battlefield, but at home too, fending off assassination attempts since he was a young boy.

It was also why only the strongest poisons, like the one that Lois provided for him, worked to calm him now. Simple herbs could no longer do the trick, when his body was accustomed to most poisons as part of his training as a prince.

He hadn't wanted that life for his son.

His hands let her go.

"I'll understand if you don't want me anymore because of all I did..."

"I'm sorry..." Lucien steps back and away from her as he apologizes.

Tears stream down Lucien's face.

"I wanted you.."

"......Only you..." the expression on Lucien's face was that if a man who was losing all hope, his will to live.

"You can go stay with Leo, now. You can even leave the castle...I free you.. " Looking down and away from her, Lucien waits for her to leave the room.

Until he feels small, perfect, precious hands pulling his face back up to face hers.

Just like she had done with her child, Sera wipes away the tears from Lucien's cheeks with her thumbs. Taking the ring from his palm, she slips it onto the finger that he'd marked before, the size of it fitting perfectly around her skin. The heat from Lucien's body as still contained within that ring, making her finger feel warm.

"I won't marry you like this.. but, we-"

Eyes widening with surprise, Lucien looks completely at loss for words when she gives him a soft kiss on the lips.

"We both deserve one more chance."

Sera understood what Lucien had been trying to do. The responsibility fell to her too, for leaving Lucien, leaving their son, and breaking his heart, when he'd begged her so hard to stay. The words responding to his confession of love were still bottled up in her heart, waiting for the right moment to spill from her lips.

This wasn't it, yet.

"This time, don't hide the truth from me, okay?"

"Okay." Nodding, Lucien sighs as his tears continue falling onto the floor between them.

Nodding back, Sera gives him a tentative smile