The Two Hundred and Eighty Pound Fat Girl and Her Five Husbands

Chapter 51: The Cook



Chapter 51

Lin Zaozao was happily thinking to herself when her face suddenly dropped.

"What's wrong, Zaozao?" Gu Shan asked in puzzlement.

"I left my money in the latrine," Lin Zaozao slapped her thigh and dashed towards the latrine. So under the bewildered gazes of Gu Shan and the others, Lin Zaozao walked out pinching a money pouch between her fingers.

She took out her dowry, a copper basin, from her room, poured in some water, then tossed the money pouch she was holding into it.

"Ye Yi, do you have any soap left? I need to wash this money pouch. It stinks too bad, I'm afraid I can't wash it clean."

Hearing Lin Zaozao's voice, Ye Yi turned around, took a bar of soap from his room and handed it to Lin Zaozao.

But when he saw what Lin Zaozao poured out of the pouch, he instinctively took a step back.

"Huh! What's the matter, Ye Yi, you've never seen so much money before!" As Lin Zaozao washed the silver coins and the green bead, she asked in puzzlement.

Seeing that Ye Yi wasn't speaking, Lin Zaozao reached out to grab his trouser leg.

"That reminds me, Ye Yi. Last night you and Ruo Qiu bet with me, and you won ten taels of silver. Those ten taels of silver! Are you going to give them to me voluntarily, or do I need to go into your room and turn it over to get them?"

Seeing Lin Zaozao's outstretched hand, Ye Yi instinctively took a step back.

Looking rather flustered, he hastily took ten taels of silver out of his pocket, threw them into Lin Zaozao's hand, then hurried under the eaves.

Murong Hai and Ruo Qiu looked at Ye Yi's somewhat panicked expression. They exchanged a glance, then peered into Lin Zaozao's copper basin.

But when they saw the green bead soaking in it, their eyes instantly bulged wide.

"Pois..."

Before Ruo Qiu could finish speaking, Murong Hai slapped a hand over his mouth and pulled him back a step.

"Poison what? Ruo Qiu, are you trying to say I'm a wicked woman! All I did was tug at your trousers a little last night and take a peek at your bottom! You're a grown man, it's been a whole night already, how can you still bear a grudge! If you feel you lost out, you're completely welcome to take a look back at me! I don't mind."

Lin Zaozao made a face at Ruo Qiu and lecherously winked, as she diligently scrubbed the bead in her hand.

Left by the latrine, this money pouch was stunk to high heaven by her earth-shattering fart. Washing it now, this large green bead looks even brighter and prettier.

Who knows how much money such a bright green, big bead could sell for?

Gu Shan looked at the bead Lin Zaozao was holding up, his eyes instantly narrowed to slits. Before he could flick out the pebble on his finger, Xiao Taohua had already brought out the prepared food.

"Lin Zaozao, little fatty, you can come eat now."

"Coming, coming! Xiao Taohua, if you call me little fatty again, I'll yank out your big front teeth!"

"Little fatty sure is fierce." Xiao Taohua said with a laugh.

"Of course!"

After washing the bead in the basin again, Lin Zaozao walked straight to the dinner table holding it.

As soon as she sat down, a flash of shock passed through Xiao Taohua's eyes.

"Lin Zaozao, isn't this bead that you stole from me?"

"Fart! This was clearly the medical fee you gave me, when did it become me stealing from you! Old lady took it fair and square. What do you mean stealing! Sounds nasty."

Lin Zaozao wiped the bead on herself and held it up to the sunlight.

Hmm! So green, so big, must be worth a lot!

"Eat, eat, what are you standing there staring for!"

Seeing the rice bowl Xiao Taohua placed in front of her, Lin Zaozao looked over the spread food on the table. Although she didn't know what it tasted like yet, with it looking so delicious, the flavor definitely wouldn't go wrong.

She picked up a bite with her chopsticks and put it in her mouth, Lin Zaozao squinted her eyes and gave Xiao Taohua a big thumbs up.

This male cook made pretty tasty food.

"Little fatty, is my cooking tasty?" Xiao Taohua asked with a smile.

"Mm-hmm! Tasty."

Putting her chopsticks down, Lin Zaozao turned and headed for Gu Shan. Just now she was so happy about eating that she forgot to call Gu Shan over to eat.

"Gu Shan, eat. Xiao Taohua's culinary skills are great, looks, smells and tastes perfect!"

Disregarding Gu Shan's objections, Lin Zaozao pushed him over to the dining table first. Then she turned back, grabbed one in each hand, Lin Wuwu and Lin Wanwan, and hauled them over to the table.

"Lin Wuwu, Lin Wanwan, can you two move your hands? Do you need me to feed you?"

Lin Wuwu and Lin Wanwan looked at the food on the table, then shook their stiff heads in unison. If possible, they would rather starve than eat this stuff.

Because they hadn't lived enough yet, and didn't want to die.

As Lin Zaozao ate with great relish, Lin Wuwu and Lin Wanwan couldn't help swallowing unconsciously.

Geez! How was their cheap older sister's body made of iron. She ate the food made by that man, and nothing whatsoever happened to her?

But Lin Zaozao couldn't be bothered paying attention to the wordless lamentation in those two bratty kids' eyes. She simply picked up another bite with her chopsticks, and prepared to put it in her mouth again.

Yet before she could eat it, she was stopped by Gu Shan.

"Zaozao, stop eating."

"What's wrong?" Lin Zaozao asked in puzzlement.

"Poisonous?"

Lin Zaozao's body froze at Gu Shan's words. She looked at the fragrant and delicious food on the table, then turned back to glance at the smiling Xiao Taohua. After swallowing her saliva, she finally turned her head back to Gu Shan and said.

"Gu Shan, surely you've got it wrong! I ate a bite just now and nothing whatsoever happened!"

"You ate it?"

Hearing the sudden rise in Gu Shan's voice, Lin Zaozao nodded honestly. Not only had she eaten it, but a large bite at that!

The taste was amazing.

Just as Lin Zaozao was looking at Gu Shan, heart thumping nonstop with trepidation, Xiao Taohua, sitting at the dining table, suddenly laughed gently.

"Dear brother, what a joke you make. I'm merely a cook, how could I possibly poison the food! If you're afraid I've poisoned it, then I'll eat first to prove it."

Speaking thus, he picked up his own chopsticks and sampled one bite of each dish into his mouth.

Only after seeing him eat it did Lin Zaozao finally heave an unconscious sigh of relief.

This guy Gu Shan, it's better if he doesn't speak. As soon as he opens his mouth he scares her half to death over some perfectly good food. He just had to go and say it's poisonous.

Just as Lin Zaozao was letting her guard down, Gu Shan looked at the green bead that she had placed by her hand.

He raised his eyes to glance at the smiling charmingly Xiao Taohua, his gaze icy cold. Then he turned and headed towards his own room.

"Gu Shan, aren't you going to eat? Xiao Taohua's cooking is pretty tasty."

But the only reply Lin Zaozao got was the back of Gu Shan's head.

Before Lin Zaozao could finish sighing emotionally, her two cheap little brothers actually dragged their stiff bodies upright, slowly propping themselves against the table as they inched their way out from under the eaves.

"Lin Wuwu, Lin Wanwan, you two bratty kids aren't eating anymore! You're both fifteen already and still as skinny as radishes. If you don't start eating properly, you two won't grow taller!"

Lin Wuwu and Lin Wanwan stiffly shook their heads at Lin Zaozao, then continued dragging their rigid bodies away.

Looking at the empty table, then back at Xiao Taohua eating with enjoyment, Lin Zaozao narrowed her eyes and questioned him sharply.

"Hey! Why aren't Gu Shan and the others eating your cooking? Don't tell me you have some kind of extraordinary identity out there!

Like the leader of an evil sect, a flower thief, or chivalrous great hero type?"

"No, I'm just a wandering ghost, how could I have an uncommon identity? If my status was unusual out there, how could I possibly be cook for a little chubby girl like you!"

"You have a point. People with status generally can't cook." Lin Zaozao said with an earnest nod.

"Little fatty, who told you that people with status can't cook?" Xiao Taohua asked, after a thoughtful glance over at the people sitting under the eves.

"The storybooks! The major characters in storybooks always have little attendants following them around. No matter what they need to do, they'll always have the little attendants do it for them." After hearing Lin Zaozao's words, Xiao Taohua's eyes immediately glinted with amusement.

"Little Fatty, what if the man with status and position is a penniless pauper without money to hire followers, what then?"

"Easy!"

Lin Zaozao picked up another bite with his chopsticks and put it in his mouth, continuing, "If he's that capable, he can just rob people if he really can't earn money! Or be a bodyguard! If all else fails, find a rich wife to be her boytoy if he's good-looking enough."

"Little Fatty, well said." The corners of Xiao Taohua's mouth quirked up as she praised.

"Of course."

Lin Zaozao picked up a bite with his chopsticks and put it smugly in his mouth.

Gu Shan wasn't eating anyway, she had to eat. She'd been starving all morning after pulling that cart.

So Lin Zaozao, focused intently on wolfing down his food, completely missed the deeper meaning in Xiao Taohua's eyes.

This little broken-down courtyard really was a lair of hidden tigers and dragons! And this little fatty before her was not so simple either!

To take his pearls and yet nothing happened to her at all...

It would seem none who lived here with those few could be all that simple.

Only after Lin Zaozao had his fill and put down his chopsticks did Xiao Taohua say with a smile in her eyes, "Lin Zaozao, was my cooking tasty?"

"Mm! Tasty."

Lin Zaozao wiped his mouth and honestly replied.

"Lin Zaozao, so you want me to continue being your personal cook?"

"Yep! After my two cheap younger brothers' wounds have healed, you can leave."

"Then where will I stay?"

"Um..."

Lin Zaozao hesitated a moment, turning to look back at the rooms behind him. Packed full as they were, he really had no room for Xiao Taohua.

"Xiao Taohua, there's no space left in my home. How about you stay in my room with me?"

"Sure!"

"Really?"

"Of course it's real. We can not only live together, at night we can even consummate our marriage!"

As she spoke, Xiao Taohua rested her chin in her hand and threw Lin Zaozao a flirtatious glance.

"That would be great."

Lin Zaozao slapped the table and stood up, grabbing Xiao Taohua's hand and heading straight for his room.

"Xiao Taohua, my bed collapsed. Fix it first, otherwise we'll have nowhere to sleep tonight, let alone consummate our marriage."

Looking at the collapsed bed, Xiao Taohua asked doubtfully, "Lin Zaozao, how did your bed collapse?"


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