The Princess's Feathers

After the final bachelors are paired, Sefri advises us on how to best enjoy the night. With a dip of her head and a mantling of wings, the event concludes, and we’re sent to wherever our inhibitions might take us. As Kin filter around me in search of an opening to take off, I study their faces. Some couples seem pleased with their curated mate, but most have looks of unease, still unsure of how the night will go.

Then I spot Kuro.

Plastered with grief, she’s walking beside her mate for the night, Skysiss. Her face is curled into a frown, and her wings are drooped so low they’re nearly dragging leaves along the ground. Even by Kuro’s standards, she seems particularly upset with this arrangement. And for his part, Skysiss seems even worse, failing to hold back a supremely terrified expression under his facial feathers. Observing this scene, I struggle to think of a time when I felt more confident that something would fail.

Kuro hesitates unexpectedly, and our eyes meet. A longing smile grows across her face, and I find myself equally as relieved. Oh, how I wish I could comfort her! It pains me to see my friend upset, even with the knowledge she’s intentionally ruining her night. She deserves so much more than this.

But before I’m allowed to feel too much solidarity, a head rubs against the top of my neck.

“Mmmh…” Nakino hums, smelling my feathers.

My whole body flinches, lanced by a primal terror at the sensation of unexpected touch. I whip around to face Nakino, a millisecond away from slicing his muzzle off.

“Um?!” I ask pointedly.

“Oh, Asha,” he mumbles dreamily, his head hovering a few feet above mine. “I didn’t mean to startle you. It’s just… did you know how good you smell?”

I blink, scarcely able to believe the words I’m hearing. A thousand negative emotions flood my flustered head, all howling for Nakino’s blood. “Dude! You can’t just touch a girl like that! I don’t care if we’re mated for the night, don’t be such a creep!” is what I want to yell at him, but self-preservation holds me back. Who knows what untold trouble I’d find myself in for tearing off Nakino’s face thirty seconds into our date?

Instead of choosing violence, I quickly avert my eyes and gaze at Kuro. And instead of Kuro, I find a Dragon bristling with fury, a millisecond away from going utterly feral. Her wings are raised, dripping with aggression as every feather on her body stands on end. She looks at me silently, waiting for the order to shred Nakino to pieces. Recalling the trouble I’ll face for ending the night in violence, I quickly shake my head. She frowns in disappointment but lowers her wings willingly.

“Yeah,” I sigh longingly. “I’ve smelled some nice Dragons before.”

“Hm?” Nakino asks.

“It’s nothing,” I quickly follow up, returning to face him. “So, what do you want to do tonight? I don’t know what Dragons like to do on dates.”

“Well,” he says, ruffling his feathers to try and regain his composure. “Some couples like to go on all-night flights. Last year, I went on a hunt with Frakia and caught my first Litsha! And some couples retire to their dens early and—“

“We are not doing that,” I say firmly.

“Oh, no, no,” Nakino corrects himself. “I don’t wanna do any of those things, either. There’s something I want to show you tonight, Asha. It’s my personal secret that I’ve never shown anyone else.”

His personal secret? Is he…?

…

…Er, no. He just told me he didn’t want to do that.

“Well, that’s awfully vague,” I observe, staring at the inky black drakon. “What’s your secret?”

He shakes his head. “I can’t tell you.”

I stare at him with my muzzle slightly agape, unable to respond.

“Not yet. I can’t tell you about it yet.”

“…And, why can’t you just tell m—“

“You have to see it in person,” he stammers. “Trust me, Asha. I promise it’s something extraordinary.”

…

Yeah, um, okay. An extraordinary secret. I can practically feel my eyes rolling about their sockets. “Nakino, why don’t we just do something normal tonight? I wouldn’t mind a long flight to—“

“No!!” he snaps, throwing down his wings.

As Nakino’s voice echoes under the tree, all the couples who hadn’t yet taken flight stop to crane their necks around and stare at us. As their eyes fall onto me, I feel myself slinking backward, wishing I could disappear into the ground below me.

Conversely, the eyes of the flock have done nothing to dampen Nakino’s resolve. “Asha,” he speaks calmly. “If you could just—“

“Fine,” I sigh, throwing my wings up in defeat. I turn around and try to put as much space between him and me as possible. “Whatever. Let’s spend Couple’s Night checking out the special thing you can’t tell me about.”

As I march away from Nakino, my feathers bristle in agitation. First, he violated my personal space by acting like we were close to each other. And now he completely embarrasses me in front of the entire flock! As if being a Farlander wasn’t enough, now everyone will gossip about how awkward our date was. This is precisely why I didn’t want to get paired with him! I tried to remain his friend, but how am I supposed to do that now?

And the worst part is, he probably doesn’t even know why I’m so upset!

I just want to be friends with him. Nothing more. Is that really too much to ask? You can still be close to someone without involving romantic feelings. Just look at me and Kuro! We’re close to each other, but never in a romantic way.

(And it’s not like she could act on any romantic feelings, anyways!)

Sensing that he’s following me, I lope into the air and quickly gain altitude. When I turn back, I see Nakino rising just a few yards behind me. Instead of confusion, his face is brimming with concern.

Him? Concerned? Yeah, right. That act won’t work on me. “Lead the way,’ I growl.

Nakino hovers in the air momentarily, studying me with a troubled expression. Eventually, he flies past and leads me through an opening in the lower branches of the Grandfather Tree and into the night. As we reach open air, the light of a cloudless Maki falls against us, illuminating our feathers ghostly pale as we ride the chilled winter currents back to the Great Valley.

“Nakino, don’t tell me your secret is a cave.”

Carpets of dried moss and snow-covered ferns cover the ruddy stone walls of a cave entrance high in the mountains of the lower Great Valley. With no scents to guide him, Nakino led me through the dense underbrush of an ungroomed montane forest to reach this far-flung point.

“It’s not a cave,” Nakino says, flattening his feathers. Slivers of planetlight shine through a canopy of redwoods, illuminating his face in a faint green glow. “It’s what’s on the other side. Don’t worry. It’s only a short walk.”

I stifle a sigh and briefly consider an aerial escape through the trees. If Kuro can get away with being rude to her mate every Couple’s Night, so could I. But we’ve flown far from the Grandfather Tree, and a small part of me is curious to discover just how underwhelming Nakino’s ‘secret’ truly is. I’m sure Kuro would love to hear about it, too.

I gaze inside the gaping maw of the moon, trying to determine its length. As I do, a cool breeze blows against my feathers, carrying strange and unfamiliar scents. A polystichum I haven’t smelled before, a bauhinia that I… wait a second… a bauhinia? I haven’t smelled one of those since I left Sarlain!

“Oh, yes,” Nakino growls in delight. “This is just a small taste, Asha.”

I blink, more surprised by Nakino’s sudden change in composure than the admission of more alien plants. Where did all that confidence come from? Nakino is timid and cowardly, not warm and self-assured. Confused, I hold my wing out and allow him to lead the way.

“Close your eyes,” Nakino speaks in a hushed tone as we step through the mouth of the cave. “Don’t worry. I’ll guide you.”

I give him a sidelong glance. What’s with all the suspense? If there are some strange plants on the other side, then that’s interesting, I guess. But why play it up? I briefly consider if I should argue with him more, but I decide to play along and follow his directions. The sooner we get this over with, the better.

As my eyes shut, something strange happens. I’ve become used to Nakino’s indistinct scent these past few weeks. But here, at this moment, it smells different — a solid and musty smell, like walking into a fern-covered grove of old-growth cedars. A moment later, I feel his heavy wing rest gently against my back, and my heart flutters again in that uniquely strange way. I can’t help but exhale a tiny squeak.

“I’m right here,” Nakino assures me in a voice smooth like honey. “Walk with me, Princess.”

Princess!?

But nobody’s ever addressed me by my royal title in Felra! How did he…?

Before I can recall when I told Nakino about royal titles, he begins moving. I feel him take a step forward, and I follow in kind. Then another and another still until we settle into a gentle trot. As we walk, he tugs his wing gently to guide me around boulders and through the flattest parts of the cave. The only sound is our breaths, my slowing heart, and the soft patter of water against cool stone.

Who is this calm and confident drakon? What happened to the timid healer who was too scared to fight a Redaga? The one that allowed Kuro to excoriate him verbally?

I want to consider these questions more, but my senses are overwhelmed with new scents. He’s leading me somewhere beaming with plants I’ve never smelled, much less seen. I’d heard tales of the strange plants of The Northern Continent as a Lemur but seldom seen few as a Lithan. I always thought it was because I arrived in autumn, but perhaps I’ve simply visited the wrong places.

For the first time tonight, agitation and anxiousness are replaced by anticipation. What wonders lie up ahead? I lean into Nakino’s wing, placing my trust entirely in him. He rubs his feathers gently against my flank.

Soon, a strange light begins to filter through closed eyes. Not quite moonlight, but something else entirely. Iridescent and bright, like staring into the city lights of Varecia on a cool summer evening. The echoes of dripping water fade, replaced by the familiar sounds of the forest at night. My talons tread over soft ground, and Nakino frees me of his wing.

“Open your eyes, Asha.”

I do as I’m told and am greeted by an astounding sight.

A grove of fantastic, glowing plants surrounds us. It stretches into the darkness, illuminating the area in a calm, cerulean glow. Many of the plants here are familiar, but there are some I’ve seen nowhere else, species utterly new to my trained eye. I see ferns, bushes, shrubs, and flowers flourishing as if they’re at the peak of the growing season. How can such wonders be possible at the beginning of winter?

I gaze skyward, expecting to find ourselves enclosed inside another cave. Rock walls surround us but don’t fully envelop the area. The faint glow of Maki shines through an opening big enough for a Dragon to fly through, though it would be difficult for more giant Dragons like Nakino. That’s why the air is so cool here; there’s an open sky! So, where’s the dusting of snow that was present outside the cave? This grove should be a lifeless, barren rock. But it’s flourishing!

“By the Goddess…” I whisper, trying to take it all in. “Nakino, what is this place?!”

“An enclave of rare plants,” he smiles. “One day, while foraging for snowberry, A vicious wind blew through the valley. Chilled to my feathers, I was forced to land and took refuge in the cave we just traversed. While waiting for the storm to pass, I saw a light at the other end of the cave and decided to explore. I was shocked when I found myself here.”

To think, a place as unique as this could be unknown to everyone in the flock but Nakino. Longing to explore it, I gaze up at Nakino. He smiles and nods in approval. Slowly, I step away from his side and examine a towering fern growing half my height. As I stick my muzzle in for a closer look, my nose bumps into a leaf, and the whole plant dims.

“Eep!” I squeak in surprise.

Nakino chuckles and moves to stand beside me. “For some reason, the plants in this grove are unaffected by the changing seasons. What’s more, on nights when Maki isn’t full, I’m unable to locate the entrance to the cave, no matter how long I search. I wish I knew why.”

“Nakino, this is…” my voice dissipates as I struggle to find adequate words. “It’s incredible. Why didn’t you tell me about this sooner?”

Nakino smirks. “Asha,” he breathes, stepping closer so he’s standing directly above me. His blue eyes lock with mine — has it taken this long to notice how radiant they are? I smell his scent, perfectly mingling with the scents of the grove around us. “I knew how special this place was the moment I discovered it. I could have shown it to anyone, but I wanted to save it for the one I felt close to….”

“And I’m that Dragon,” I hazard a guess.

“Yes,” he whispers. “Asha, when you first walked into my den, I…” he trails off and shakes his head. “Well, let’s just say you have no idea how alluring your plumage is. And when you told me why Messi wasn’t healing, I…”

As his voice dissipates again, I bury my head into his chest feathers — the highest point I can reach. His racing heart begins to slow, and a moment later, he rubs his head against my own. As we share a tender moment, a tiny voice inside my head bleats that we shouldn’t get close — he’ll only feel worse when I fly home in the spring. But how could I choose to ignore him? He’s pouring his heart out for me.

After what seems like hours, I pull my head back and break the silence. “You’ve never met someone like me before, have you?”

‘Never,” he whispers. “I could visit every island, fly through every valley, and never find someone quite like you.”

As Nakino stares down, a strange sensation overtakes me. A warm and fuzzy feeling that I’ve never felt before. Nakino’s opened up to me in ways he’s never done before. I’m someone truly special to him… it feels good to be that person in his life. It makes me feel happy, too.

“I know why other Kin don’t like me.” He murmurs, trying to find his voice. His face turns glum, filled with shame and resentment. “I’m difficult to get along with. I feel detached from the flock and make bad decisions. But even at my worst, you’ve always been kind to me, Asha. And when I’m alone with you, I feel a confidence I’ve never felt with anyone else. I…”

As Nakino looks down at me, something changes. It seems he’s about to weep before his face tightens with resolve. He closes his eyes, and his muzzle slowly opens. As he lowers his head before me, something deep inside my body compels me to join him. I draw open my muzzle and close my eyes. The sounds of the forest grow softer, vying for presence against the beating of fervent hearts.

We kiss.

With our muzzles locked together, a particular curiosity grows. I open my eyes to find Nakino’s closed tight in ecstasy. He’s really enjoying this, isn’t he?

Do I feel the same as him?

I release my muzzle and pull back slightly. As Nakino releases, he keeps his eyes closed a moment longer and exhales in bliss. Slowly, his eyes reopen into slits, reflecting the glow of the grove around us. As they focus on me, concern forms across his face.

“Is everything alright?” he asks.

I nod slowly. “It is. I just, um, never expected my first kiss would be with a Lithan.”

“I never expected my first kiss would be with a Farlander.”

A smile curls across his face, and I can’t help but mimic it. We chuckle to ourselves.

“Okay, but… did you enjoy it?” Nakino asks, relaxing his feathers. “Your first kiss?”

I stare up at him for a moment, anxious about my response. It worries me, but he deserves to know the truth. “I did. It was nice.”

“That’s great!” he exclaims, nearly falling backward into a glowing thicket. “Oh, Asha. I’m so relieved!”

I force a smile. I’m happy that… well, I could make him happy. But something doesn’t feel right. Why am I not enjoying this tender moment as much as he is? Should I be enjoying it as much as him? Ugh, what can’t I understand…?

“I’ve got an idea,” Nakino announces suddenly, rising to his talons. “Asha, there’s something in the valley I forgot to show you. A special plant that only grows around here. Why don’t you explore the grove while I look for it?”

Eager to find any exit from this suddenly uncomfortable situation, I nod in agreement. “Okay. Sure.”

“Ah, thank you!” Nakino steps beside me and rubs his head gently against mine. “Asha...! Oh, I love you, Asha!”

All I can do is smile.

Nakino casts about and darts through the entrance of the cave. As the echo of talonsteps fades, the familiar sounds of the forest grow around me. Alone with my thoughts, I relax my wings against the ground and release a shaky sigh. It feels like I’ve landed in a valley I can never fly out of.

The truth is, I know why I can’t enjoy this moment: The guilt of exploring romance hangs heavy over my heart. How could I be so careless? I can’t date a Dragon! When the seasons change in spring, I’m flying home to Ellyntide and leaving Felra forever. And the longer Nakino believes there’s something special between us, the harder it will be to tell him there isn’t.

But that’s the problem. I wasn’t lying.

When we kissed, I enjoyed it. I really did.

Does enjoying a kiss mean I have romantic feelings for him? Or do I just enjoy kissing? Am I confusing feelings of friendship with feelings of romance? I’ve never been in a relationship before, so how could I know? What does it feel like to be in love?! Agh, this is all so confusing!

I settle against the ground and exhale, trying to calm my racing thoughts. Nakino told me to explore the grove while I waited for his return. Would that help me relax? Admittedly, I’m deathly curious about the plants here. He wasn’t kidding. This grove is incredible! It defies all known science! But I’m anxious to understand my feelings for Nakino, no matter how complicated the truth may be.

I close my eyes and draw deep, calming breaths. Think, Asha! How do I really feel about him? Concentrate on the familiar sounds of the forest. Let them relax your mind and uncover the truth.

…

…If Nakino’s feelings for me are so ardent, then what about Kuro’s?

We engage in much of the same behavior. The head rubs, the nuzzling… arguably, me and her are far closer than me and Nakino.

If that’s the case, then… could that mean…

…

…!

Quicker than a bolt of lightning, I react.

I launch from my talons, flare my wings, and dodge to the immediate left. As I sail recklessly through the air, an unseen pair of claws extend outward to catch the side of my foreleg. Hot pain lances my body as a fresh wound is torn against my hind leg.

Impacting the ground, I screech and tumble into a patch of glowing ferns. When the rolling slows, I jump to my talons and shriek in defiance at my surprise attacker. Who’s here?! Prey? Redaga? Locked in a daze by adrenaline and instinct, I can scarcely believe what’s standing before me.

A red— no, a crimson-plumaged Kin stands before me with his wings splayed, and his head lowered in the attack position. He gazes toward the injury on my leg with wild eyes, and is eyes narrow to slits.

RRARRGGHH!!!

Relmoon?!

What’s happened to him!? He’s lost control!