LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 28
“You step outside, and you’ll die.”
Eliya said with a chilling smile.
I struggled to move my stiff body.
First, I concentrated on the tips of my fingers.
I rolled my eyes and looked around.
The room held only Eliya and me.
Since we were having an important conversation, I had sent the servants away.
I traced a hypothetical route for escape in my mind.
Is it possible?
Eliya is a wizard.
She doesn’t even need to use teleportation.
With that fire she used against Balak, I would be burnt to ashes.
Brilliant golden flames.
How many times had I died to them?
Technically, it was just my character.
‘Even if I can escape, it’ll be an issue. Even though I’m not in the room, there are people outside…’
Seeing me deep in thought, Eliya took a step back.
As she walked over to the window, she calmly said,
“Can you handle the covert operations of the Bevel Family?”
…Huh?
‘If she says I’ll die, then…’
The escape routes I’d been conjuring in my mind wiped away.
Eliya hadn’t said she would kill me.
She just said I would die.
I’d been so focused on Eliya that I missed the bigger picture.
Balak.
He had declared that he would keep an eye on me.
He would use methods that didn’t directly involve Eliya.
That implied Balak would go to any lengths to monitor me moving forward.
In the worst-case scenario, I might just keel over on the street.
Staying inside this mansion, close to Eliya, is my best bet for safety.
That’s the truth.
Living only at the training center wouldn’t be a wise option either.
Eliya had been indifferent to the knight who watched over her, making it poorly guarded.
Eliya pointed that out.
I had no choices left.
“Ah…”
What a delusion I had crafted on my own….
I felt embarrassed.
Eliya smiled and asked,
“You have no choice but to live here, right?”
I stared blankly at Eliya’s bright smile.
Her round, pronounced cheeks.
What could possibly be so amusing that she smiled like that?
I’m stuck with you anyway….
‘……’
I recalled Eliya, who had been whining and crying.
She seemed so alien from the Eliya I knew, an uncanny sight.
She laughs so easily, as if she doesn’t even remember.
This face is also unfamiliar.
I’ve never seen Eliya smile like this before.
And from it, another image overlays.
The murderous wicked woman who seemed like she would kill me.
“It’s safe here.”
“…I will not cause you trouble, milady.”
In the end, I had no choice but to accept.
Let’s think positively.
I am still terrified she’ll burn me alive.
Especially the sight she just showed… Even thinking about it gives me chills.
‘Why does she have to smile so terrifyingly…! Was I just being overly paranoid and imagining things?’
But there’s a silver lining.
I could stick to the nutrition coach’s diet plan.
That’s my only comfort.
Oh, and being somewhat safe from Balak too.
‘…But wait, is Balak watching me because of Eliya? If she hadn’t tried to keep me close, this wouldn’t have happened, right?’
It’s unfair, but that’s in the past now.
If I go further back, it’s because I caught someone’s eye before.
This is karma.
I’m reaping what I’ve sown.
It’s not a situation I’m surprised by.
I can’t help but blame my short temper.
‘That temper is what makes it a problem even if I try to run away now.’
Balak might think I’m a stain on the life of a noble lady and could decide to remove me.
‘If only the information guild would help me out, I’d have a chance to slip past Balak’s watch… But I haven’t heard from them yet.’
I’ll run when Eliya’s interest wanes.
The plan remains unchanged.
Balak and Eliya.
I can’t keep two ticking time bombs around me.
‘Eliya’s interest should be waning soon.’
In my view, she has reached her peak interest.
Now it’s only a matter of her dwindling interest.
Though I now reside in the room next to hers, I don’t see her that often.
She is incredibly busy.
I don’t know her detailed schedule, but I too need to go back and forth to the training center.
The time I can stay here is limited.
Her interest will naturally decrease.
‘From now on, I should live with a bit less temper….’
It’s not that Eliya isn’t pitiable.
But to shoulder the responsibility just because of that would be arrogant.
If I take on that responsibility, how long would it last? A lifetime?
I can’t decide that whimsically.
Even if I did, I couldn’t act casually about it.
‘The thought of running away is a bit arrogant too.’
What if Eliya loses all interest and simply forgets about me?
The Eliya I know is quick to lose interest.
Among my hopes, one question lingers.
Why did Eliya come to find me that dawn?
What if her interest doesn’t wane; what would happen then?
What if Eliya…
“Hmm.”
Eliya gazed at me intently.
“You had a strange thought, didn’t you?”
“…Wha-what? No, I didn’t!”
“Your face gives it all away.”
I pat my face, scrambling for an explanation.
I am unsure…
“It’s not like I dislike it.”
“…Thank you.”
“Is this place a burden for you?”
Since venturing a lie only leads to being keenly observed, I gave up attempting to deflect.
“To be honest, yes. As I mentioned earlier, this place and treatment is too grand for me.”
Eliya didn’t frown at my honest answer.
It could be seen as rude.
Instead, she simply smiled, apparently pleased.
“It’s not too grand. I, your master, don’t feel that way.”
“……….”
The tone of her sweetness felt careless.
As if she would protect me.
Again, it’s a foreign sight I can’t help but look at.
A new side of Eliya.
It’s confusing.
Every time Eliya acts like this, I…
“Oh, right. I just remembered I needed to ask you something.”
“You mean me?”
“Yeah. I want to know what should be done about Gawain’s punishment.”
“Uh…?”
“During the duel tournament, you remember how I couldn’t detect his magical power?”
Ah. That did happen, now that I think about it.
I had completely forgotten.
“He should be punished for that, but I can’t think of a suitable option. The only thing I can think of is to kill him nicely and return him to his family.”
…How very wicked of her.
“But Gawain is someone I can’t do that to. So I thought it’d be best to ask you, who was nearly a victim.”
“That… That’s quite a compliment, but can I really decide?”
“Yes.”
She said it so casually that I began to feel that way too.
Since I was the victim, it felt right that I would get to decide, didn’t it?
But I’m not like Eliya.
I’m just an ordinary person who’s never meddled in anyone’s affairs .
“Just speak comfortably.”
Eliya leaned on her hands and smiled.
She gave an attitude that anything I say would be fine.
What should I do?
Gawain, a capable knight from the Bevel Family. The current head of the training center.
He is quite a skilled individual destined to make a name for himself in the future.
My contemplation didn’t last long.
“I’d like him to teach me swordplay.”
What I need right now are two things.
Strength or money.
But asking Gawain to hand over some coins for his punishment wouldn’t make sense.
I’d rather take advantage of the strength he possesses.
I might have overlooked Galliot’s magical power due to my complacency, but he’s a knight of considerable skill, as far as I know.
Eliya blinked at me with surprise.
Her usual glimmering red eyes returned as she grinned.
“That’s new. I never would have guessed you’d ask for something like this.”
“…….”
“You’re quite earnest. Do you really want to be my knight?”
It seems Eliya misunderstood my enthusiasm.
I couldn’t deny it; I just lowered my head obediently.
“You’re truly amazing. You act as if you want to die, yet you plot your future like this.”
…I do appear to act that way.
Feigning despair while planning for tomorrow.
I know that much.
But it’s not that I want to die.
I’m neither fearless nor is it the case.
“I don’t want to die; I just despise the thought of yielding even if I do.”
I remain submissive if left undisturbed.
I surprisingly have a calm and composed side…
‘……’
Well, not entirely. There is some truth to it.
So… Ah, I genuinely am composed when training or exercising.
People around me set off my mental state, but that’s just an illusion.
But I learned in my past life.
If you stay still, you’ll get stepped on.
It’s not that I’m weak and get trampled on.
People always step on those who remain idle.
So I must ensure no one can trample me and wrestle against the odds.
I must show that I won’t be a stepping stone for your advance, even if I die.
If I remain passive, I’ll be treated like mere stairs.
People have the right to refuse such treatment.
Morality, ethics, right from wrong: I don’t know about those complex matters.
What’s wrong is wrong.
This is the reason I lashed out at Balak.
It’s about not wanting to ignore what I know to be wrong.
I don’t want to be the one bowing to an injustice in front of me and later criticizing that very injustice, only to exploit or recycle it later.
And I don’t want to be the one to look away when it’s not a direct concern, only to belatedly point out the unjust structure to others when it hits home.
‘But really, I do become settled if no one antagonizes me.’
For example, just look at Eliya.
I don’t challenge Eliya.
…Come to think of it, I have rarely opposed her.
Fear of dying?
That’s a significant reason too.
But more importantly, Eliya has never messed with my mood.
She has never forced me to bend or trample something of mine.
Instead, surprisingly, she often acknowledged me…
“You sure have freedom.”
Eliya’s statement interrupted my thoughts.
It was spoken lightly, as if she’d merely blurted it out.
She smiled sweetly at me.
Contrary to her clear smile.
“Individuals have the right to rebel against their oppression.”
Her soft words seemed a bit lonely.
They appeared suffocating too.
It felt like a soliloquy.
“For your freedom, you are ready to die. As for me…”
She trailed off, glancing out the window.
With a far-off gaze.
Outside the second-floor window was the mansion’s garden.
A garden with plants that had emerald greens even in winter.
Above it, the spacious sky loomed.
And the window was closed.
Finally, she spoke again.
While still looking outside.
“I cannot, so you catch my eye.”
An elevated perspective.
In contrast to my impulsive nature, eager to dive into current matters, her gaze reached far beyond.
She appeared weary.
“Am I just foolish?”
“Where’s the foolishness in that?”
I replied instinctively.
“Not everyone can live as I do. They don’t need to either. However, as you said, I seek a modest freedom, and you seek something grander, that’s the difference.”
That was my opinion.
This felt like a unique experience.
In the game, I never had the chance to talk like this with Eliya.
Even when I spoke, I was always limited to multiple-choice responses.
I never spoke.
Eliya chuckled softly.
“Are you teaching me?”
“No, that’s not what I meant….”
“How unusual. Typically, those with convictions and strong will try to impose their beliefs onto others. But you… ”
Eliya’s gaze turned towards me.
Her ruby-red eyes.
Long lashes holding steady, refusing to blink or elaborate, staring intensely. For a slightly awkwardly long time. Silence enveloped the room.
Her eyes gradually narrowed.
Creating a crescent shape.
The corners of her mouth turned upwards.
A rosy blush started shining on her round cheeks.
Illuminated with light.
She continued to smile and added,
“You, who refuse even the instinct of life and seem indifferent to dying at any moment, are truly an intriguing person.”
Eliya looked at me.
I merely bowed my head.
I couldn’t meet her gaze.
“…Thank you.”
She responded with a bright smile.
“I’ll look forward to your progress, Judas.”
This kind of recognition felt like a first.
The one giving it was Eliya.
It stirred strange feelings within me.
*
“Private lessons, huh…”
Gawain stood in front of me, stroking his chin as he murmured.
“I never thought something like this would replace a penalty. Though, I should be grateful for it.”
In a location quite distant from the main part of Eliya’s mansion.
Gawain and I met in the indoor training ground.
The space was covered with dirt.
This was a place where the knights and soldiers usually trained when staying in the mansion.
Now, I had sent everyone away.
“Are you truly satisfied with what this offers? My crime is not light.”
“It’s fine. I rather see it as a good opportunity.”
“Hmm… I sensed you were an eager candidate, yet you’ve exceeded my expectations. Good. If that’s the price, I can offer as much.”
He casually tossed a practice sword towards me.
“I have trained several individuals, including the trainees, but to be honest, I’m not a kind instructor. I also lack confidence in being a good teacher.”
I received it and continued to absorb what he was saying.
“I value practical fighting over theory and lean more towards criticism than praise. I don’t know how to ease up, so you’ll likely end up getting hurt severely. This is my final question. Are you okay with that?”
That is precisely what I wished for.
Harsh and brutal lessons are far better than simple, unhelpful instructions.
What I pursue is strength to save my neck.
Moreover, I now have to be cautious of Balak too.
I want to grow stronger as quickly as possible.
“I’m fine with it.”
“Good. I like your gaze.”
Gawain tossed aside his shield.
“First, let’s see what kind of skills you have. Come at me as if you’re intending to kill.”
Taking cues from the [Sword Defense Technique], I readied my stance before cautiously approaching him.
Gawain was equipped with a longsword.
I cautiously explored for weaknesses before inserting my sword in what I thought was an opening.
But his blade easily twisted around mine, and simultaneously, Gawain’s sword jabbed into my solar plexus.
A heavy impact pierced through my body.
I gasped for air.
“Ugh-”
“Again.”
From then on, I was beaten like laundry.
*
“What kind of madman…?”
The curse slipped from my lips.
My target was Gawain.
I felt like I’d been thoroughly thrashed.
It felt like he had been itching to beat me for a while.
But I’d wholeheartedly admit this training was effective and meaningful.
This was on an entirely different level compared to what I learned at the training center.
Rather than being taught, I was acquiring the lessons through the beating I took, but either way,
[Defense Technique] leveled up.
‘Not something I want to repeat often….’
Both he and I have our own duties, so training has been set for two sessions per week.
The time and place remained flexible.
‘Learning through beatings is indeed the fastest way. I should absorb as much as I can while I have this opportunity.’
Once our training concluded, Anna guided me.
Though there had been a disturbance the night prior, guests still filled the mansion.
It seemed Eliya’s birthday banquet was still in full swing.
“This will be the room that you will use from now on, Judas.”
The room next to Eliya’s personal bedroom.
It was considerably larger than a typical bedroom and had all the necessary amenities.
Of course, it had a bathroom and even a dressing room.
I never expected I would live in a room with a dressing room.
This is indeed luxurious.
Much more spacious and tidy than the room I had been isolated in last night.
Anna would continue to be my attendant here.
“If you need anything else, please let me know. I will be staying in the room right across from you.”
Anything else I would need would either be a matter of conscience or just indecency.
After inspecting my room, I went to find my companions from Room 13.
Since the banquet was still ongoing, they remained in the secondary building.
“Judas!”
“What’s going on?”
“Hey! What happened early this morning?”
“Is it true that an intruder showed up?”
“Are you okay?!”
They bombarded me with questions.
From what I gathered, Balak had briefly explained the events that unfolded to the guests, and now they were also aware of it.
So I decided to be honest, though I didn’t go into specifics.
I just shared that Eliya had been attacked and I happened to find her while I was in the restroom.
An unbelievable coincidence, or perhaps it was true.
“…That’s how it went down. As you can see, I wasn’t harmed.”
Though I did get hurt from Gawain, it wasn’t during that early incident.
After I finished speaking, there was a brief moment of silence among them.
Richard was the first to break it.
“Are you okay?”
He wasn’t referring to my body.
I had killed someone for the first time.
While we receive some mental training about murder.
After all, being a knight entails killing every life that threatens your master.
Even if it’s a person.
But training and actual murder are worlds apart.
I spoke honestly.
“I was s tense at first, but surprisingly… I’m okay.”
“Well… if that’s the case, then it’s fine, dude.”
Not just Richard, but no one else brought up the topic of murder.
Rather they offered words of encouragement and support.
After all, they were those aspiring to be Eliya’s knights.
Dillon patted my back.
“You did well.”
This place surely has a different ethical view compared to the world I was familiar with.
Still, it was quite reassuring.
*
“Hmm…”
Miguel, the butler of Eliya’s mansion, adjusted his glasses as he surveyed the surroundings.
The garbage corner in the manor.
A location where all the waste generated by the mansion was pooled.
Every so often, everything would be disposed of at once.
The birthday banquet for Eliya was still ongoing.
Therefore, as the head butler, he was required to serve or oversee the guests in the banquet hall.
Yet, as the overall manager, he also had to visit places like this occasionally.
If surveillance slackens, tasks begin to flow leisurely.
It wasn’t so much loyalty but more of a professional compulsion.
Eliya and Judas had faced recent troubles, yet the world continued as usual.
Miguel found that nothing was particularly surprising about it.
His primary concern was determining to whom he should be genuinely loyal.
“Sir Miguel?”
A servant approached him.
The bag he had brought was stuffed with various trash.
It was astonishing how quickly garbage accumulated after a single day of the banquet beginning.
Particularly shards of broken glass and wine bottles littered the bag. Miguel had lost interest in the contents, however.
“I found this.”
The servant handed him a small piece of paper.
Paper found among the trash received special consideration.
Especially on a day when nobles gathered.
No one could know the secrets that were exchanged amongst the aristocrats.
Though it was rare for someone to carelessly drop something, it did occur.
Those confidential notes usually contained trivial matters, such as love letters exchanged among young nobles.
Minor, yet not something to overlook.
“Hmm.”
Miguel took the paper, filled with creases and signs of wear.
It was filthy with sand, indicating it had been rolling on the ground for a while.
But, there wasn’t a single thing written on it.
Blank content.
‘Durable material. Quite an expensive item. Something like this shouldn’t just be discarded.’
The raggedly torn end was worn out.
There were definite signs that something had been written and exchanged at some point.
Miguel held the paper up against the sun and asked,
“Where did you find this?”
“Um… I can’t quite remember. But it was found while I was organizing the trash. I’m sorry… Ah, but I think it was near where they were selecting candidates for the knights. I’m not sure though…”
An utterly blank piece of paper.
Miguel slipped off his gloves to handle it with his bare hands.
He flattened it out before feeling the paper’s texture with his fingertips.
Although the creased and folded marks made it challenging to discern, he could tell…
‘There are traces of something having been written.’
There were faint impressions left by someone using a pen.
Minuscule but undeniably present.
‘It was probably written with an easily erasable or volatile writing instrument.’
These would indicate the content written was a secret directive never intended to see the light of day.
‘Who could have been so careful about this…? And what could their purpose possibly be?’
Miguel found himself in a second dilemma.
He was Balak’s right-hand man.
He had been tasked with monitoring Eliya and reporting her movements to Balak.
Miguel could only speculate about Balak’s motivations.
Primarily, it involved keeping watch over the emerging powerhouse that was Eliya.
Recently, Eliya had awakened her powers.
The flames that had illuminated the dawn yesterday remained vibrant in his mind.
He wrestled with the conflict.
Eliya’s powers are even regarded with caution by Balak.
It could potentially shift the power dynamics entirely.
Should he trust her abilities and follow her?
If so, he must show this paper to her.
But she’s merely a fledgling wizard just now emerging.
With no firm foundations.
Should it be that he should remain loyal to Balak as he had been?
Then, he must conceal the paper.
‘……’
Miguel made his decision.