LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 23
Eliya took my gift.
In person.
Approaching me without a word.
“Hey… you’re in big trouble,”
Richard said.
He wasn’t wrong.
Hundreds of nobles here are all staring at me.
Especially the men.
They glare at me with eyes that could chop wood.
It feels like they might pounce at any moment.
“Who is that? That guy.”
“Never seen him among the nobles… wait, judging by his attire, he’s not a noble.”
“That’s the guy Elijah brought into the annex…”
So, I was already halfway to being a celebrity.
I didn’t know that.
And now I’ll become famous beyond recovery.
Haha. How delightful.
Oblivious to my distress, Eliya walked casually.
At the edge of the red carpet was a raised platform.
On it sat a grand and high chair, like a throne.
It was so high that Eliya couldn’t sit on it without the steps meant for climbing up.
As she sat down, Ria carefully approached and cleared the steps.
Eliya looked down from her elevated position.
Behind her, the antlers of the Moon Deer occasionally peeked out.
“Esteemed guests who have spent time more valuable than gold to visit us,”
Eliya began to speak.
The small girl’s voice was calm and gentle.
Even though she wasn’t raising her voice, it filled the wide hall.
“I sincerely thank you for adorning this vast, black mansion as your constellation.”
What the heck…?
Someone mumbled beside me.
From the voice, it was Lindell.
It was certainly an analogy and rhetoric that was difficult for common folk like us to understand.
The invited nobles nodded their heads with pleased smiles.
“I sincerely appreciate your coming to celebrate my humble 13th birthday. Even though today I am the protagonist, it does not mean that you are not the protagonist either. Every individual leads their own life as their own protagonist.”
I rolled my eyes inwardly and shook my head.
Eliya never looked like a child in normal circumstances.
She particularly didn’t now.
Her speech and vocabulary.
“Please relax and enjoy, and graciously brighten this occasion.”
The guests applauded.
We in the 13th Room clapped along in bewilderment.
“And my father…”
My eyes widened.
This is finally the moment to see Eliya’s father in person.
“Duke Bevel will greet you guests, so please welcome him with applause.”
Eliya smiled as she turned her head.
I followed her gaze.
Near her, crowding around Narcissi, were family members with blonde hair and red eyes.
From that group, a middle-aged man stepped out.
He had a massive build.
Though he had a protruding belly, his body looked robust overall.
It felt like the sturdy physique of someone who had trained.
His large head and thick beard gave him a masculine and strong appearance.
‘Just as expected, that’s Eliya’s real father.’
I know his name.
Balak de Bevel.
The woman waving her hand toward Balak was Narcissi.
Next to her, teenagers of various ages with blonde and red eyes.
Probably their children.
And not a single one of them had black hair.
Not even anyone who remotely resembles Eliya.
Balak stood beside Eliya.
The contrast between blonde and black hair was striking.
The only similarity was the red eyes.
“…Ah.”
I realized then.
‘Bastard…’
Not a child born from a lawful concubine, but a child born from a slip-up.
Blood considered a mistake and misfortune.
In this world, that alone was a crime enough to be born.
Bastard.
Balak smiled warmly at Eliya.
Eliya did the same.
From the outside, they looked like a close father and daughter.
Balak offered a brief greeting.
“Please, enjoy yourselves without reservation.”
The grand banquet began in earnest.
The nobles freely gathered in groups to chat.
Of course, Eliya was at the center of it all.
There were so many people that Eliya was hardly visible.
I could only barely hear whispers.
“Miss, I brought a gift from our estate…”
“Gifts are separate.”
Eliya spoke dryly.
Though she rudely interrupted, nobody pointed it out.
I couldn’t see what Eliya’s expression was like.
There was another center as well, which was Balak de Bevel who just emerged before.
A large group formed around him and his family, the Bevel Family.
The crowd around them was larger than the one centered around Eliya.
Balak and the Bevel Family.
And Eliya.
There was a conspicuous distance between the two groups, like they were spread apart by fingers.
“Judas? What are you doing? Let’s go eat.”
Richard grabbed my arm and led me away.
“Oh, yes. Let’s go.”
I moved toward the restaurant, leaving Eliya behind.
For some reason, I kept wanting to look back.
*
The restaurant was a sort of buffet style.
As a guest, you could come in freely and eat as much food as you wanted whenever.
Taking food outside was also permitted.
“Wow…”
We each piled our plates high with meat.
It was an amount that looked filling just to see.
“Wow…”
Someone sighed in bliss while eating the meat.
The rich, savory taste of grease filled my mouth.
And the flavor of spices.
It was undoubtedly a taste I’d never experienced before.
Nobles passing by glanced at us with disapproving looks.
It felt like they were seeing beggar kids scraping for scraps.
The amount of food on their plates was so little that it wouldn’t even suffice for one bite.
Some of us flinched under the noble’s gaze, and our eating slowed down.
“Geez, why do you care about that? Just eat up. It’s not like we stole anything!”
Richard argued, stuffing his mouth full and gesturing with his fork.
“And you, Judas.”
He pointed at me this time.
“Why do you look so defeated?”
Even in front of the protein I had long desired, my appetite was nonexistent.
It was all Eliya’s fault.
Bastard.
The distance.
The bruises on my wrist.
The isolated mansion.
Everything clicked together like a puzzle.
It consumed my thoughts so completely that the food simply wouldn’t enter my mouth.
‘What’s the point of me worrying…’
The opponent is different.
The Bevel family.
The second-most powerful family in this world after the royal family.
I can’t even compare to guys like Kale or Galliot.
‘What am I even thinking of myself as?’
I should be mindful of things.
‘Just because she’s a bastard doesn’t mean they’ll have a bad relationship… Tsk, what nonsensical optimism is this?’
No matter how much I knew the future, Eliya’s abilities are objectively superior to mine.
Her talent as a wizard.
That “crazy fire” has the power to shake the world.
She’ll manage on her own.
Honestly, I’m someone who will be leaving here soon anyway.
I don’t need to care.
“Isn’t it that you realized the difference between you and the lady?”
“Right! That’s it! Seeing the lady among nobles made you realize it’s an impossible love!”
“The insurmountable gap of rank that interferes with destiny… Judas is just accepting that and burying her in his heart…”
Shut up.
…That thought rose up to the back of my throat.
But the exaggerated antics eased my uncomfortable feelings a bit.
I seem to be the only one worrying about Eliya being a bastard.
Did they already know?
Or does it not matter whether she’s a bastard or not, that Eliya, a great noble, is not someone we can talk about?
“That’s not it,”
I replied bluntly as I speared the meat with my fork.
“It’s not?”
Argon chuckled.
“You’re just feeling it at your age. It’s understandable, mmm.”
Is it alright to be treated like a kid by someone much younger than me?
I had no retort to that, and indeed, I was younger than Argon right now.
The meat was undeniably delicious.
It was the best food I had in this world.
‘It shouldn’t be this extravagant, but I wish I could eat like this every day…’
Thinking of other things, I forcibly cleared Eliya from my mind.
*
Even after finishing the meal, we had time left.
Though we were guests invited here, we didn’t have much to do once here.
We couldn’t build connections with other nobles or mingle in the social circles.
There might be someone from a noble background among us, but we weren’t at the level to flaunt our family’s name.
If we were of that caliber, we wouldn’t be candidate knights.
Wandering around aimlessly, I decided to explore the mansion.
It was my first time being in Eliya’s mansion too.
I had only ever stayed in the annex.
I never wanted to come here.
The hallways were covered in lavish carpets, and sunlight streamed through slender, tall windows.
On the walls, there were either paintings or potted plants.
Not a single spot was left unattended.
I could admire the noble mansion for only a moment.
Not ready to return to the room just yet, and with no particular place to go.
Eventually, we returned to the main hall.
In the hall, the ceremony for presenting Eliya’s birthday gifts was in progress.
It was the event where Eliya was to confirm a few of the gifts collected.
Seated in her high chair, Eliya was tightly hugging the gift box I gave her.
“The next gift is from Marchioness Bouton,”
The butler acting as the host spoke loudly but maintained formality.
He was the same butler who had rejected my gift earlier.
“Marchioness Bouton’s house is famous for its exotic hunting. I’m very curious about what gift has arrived.”
The head butler, Miguel, carefully began to unwrap the box.
It turned out to be a small leather bag.
It was a size that suited a girl.
The person who gifted it, Marchioness Bouton, came out to explain.
“This bag is crafted from the skin of the monstrous Great Jaw Crocodile, hand-stitched by our family’s artisans. Using traditional methods, we chose the colors and designs that would best suit the young lady…”
Eliya listened to the explanation with a blank face.
Realizing that she was getting bored, the marquis quickly interrupted himself.
Eliya responded simply, her face unimpressed.
“I’ll use it gratefully.”
After Marchioness Bouton stepped back, a maid took the bag away to another place.
Just as they were about to introduce the next gift.
Eliya and I made eye contact again.
Now it’s getting scary.
Amidst all these people, how can she find me so accurately?
Trying to stealthily look away and slip back, she gestured toward me.
Everyone in the hall turned to look at me.
“What? What’s going on?”
“Isn’t that the kid?”
“Oh, the one brought into the annex…”
The people around me stepped back, creating a distance.
Even my companions in the 13th room kept their distance as if they weren’t part of me.
Feeling bold, I pointed to my face with my finger.
Sure enough, Eliya nodded.
Reluctantly, I walked toward her.
The heat of everyone’s gaze was prickly.
Since she was seated in a high chair, I had to look up at her.
“This…”
Eliya extended the gift box toward me and asked,
“Can I open it here?”
Yes.
Of course, it’s yours now, do whatever you want without asking me.
Why do this in front of all these people?
Is she deliberately trying to make my life miserable?
…Hiding that true intent, I nodded my head.
“Yes, my lady.”
Eliya promptly began to unwrap the gift.
Finally revealed was a sleeping black cat doll.
Eliya stared down at it.
Laughter erupted from somewhere.
“Pfft… This is what commoners consider tasteful.”
“Does the lady like such childish gifts?”
“Truly lacking in standards.”
The voices sounded patronizing, feigning humility as they mocked others.
Honestly, I couldn’t care less.
I want to leave here.
Those words were probably true.
It wouldn’t be a gift I would expect Eliya to like.
But contrary to my expectations,
Eliya hugged the doll tightly.
Not a strong embrace, but gentle.
Somewhere, a high-pitched “Eek!” could be heard as if someone was overwhelmed by its cuteness.
To my confusion, she smiled softly and asked,
“By the way, why were you holding onto it? Your gifts were supposed to be gathered together. Didn’t Anna show you?”
“No, no. That’s not it. Anna diligently informed me.”
“Oh really? Then…”
Eliya’s head slowly turned.
She stared intently at the butler in charge of the ceremony.
The one who had rejected my gift earlier.
As Eliya made eye contact with him, his expression quickly stiffened.
Eliya slowly nodded and smiled.
“…I see. You can go now. Thank you for the gift.”
“It’s an honor…”
I returned to my spot.
I didn’t know if I was walking properly.
The faces of several nobles turned red.
Not from embarrassment, but from the rage ready to explode.
Among them, a young man glared daggers at me.
‘Ah. He’s probably one of those who insulted me earlier.’
I met his eyes and smiled faintly, like a victorious winner.
No matter how chaotic everything was, I still wanted to ruffle some feathers.
What did I do to warrant such controversy?
I certainly didn’t consider myself a true victor.
It’s just a payback for the nasty feelings.
I even nodded in a benevolent way.
The young man’s face turned redder as if he were about to explode, but he didn’t take action.
He wouldn’t dare act out in a place like this, after all.
That evening,
The dimwits in the 13th Room engaged in a heated discussion about whether Eliya liked me or not.
The one who needs to break through the wall of social status is not me, but now it’s Eliya.
They’re out of their minds.
That’s practically insulting the owner in her mansion.
Thank goodness Anna’s not around as they would be in for some serious punishment if heard.
The meaningless discussions lasted till the late night.
Seated on my bed in a daze, I muttered to myself.
‘I wish everyone would just shut up.’
*
“Are you out of your mind?”
Narcissi asked,
her eyes seemed like they were ready to tear apart the black cat doll hugged by Eliya.
“You’re trying to disgrace our family? Doing such a thing in front of everyone…!”
“But,”
Eliya replied calmly.
“I never expected the Duchess to try to assassinate me. I couldn’t control the rebellious spirit rising in my innocent heart.”
“…”
“I knew she wanted me dead, but I never thought she would resort to such means…”
Narcissi gaped like a fish out of water.
It was a reaction I had never seen before.
Eliya smiled mischievously as if she found it amusing.
“Didn’t you already hear? I guess your acting skills are lacking when pretending to be unaware of being hit directly.”
“You little…!”
The moment Narcissi raised her hand,
Eliya rolled her eyes coldly.
Her icy red eyes pierced through Narcissi.
“How predictable. It’s always difficult at first, but once you do it, it gets easier afterwards. You no longer hesitate to touch my face, do you?”
“…”
“But you should be careful, shouldn’t you? Even if not everyone in this mansion is on my side.”
Eliya’s smiling eyes quickly scanned the room.
Ria and Miguel,
two of the high-ranking servants in the mansion were present.
“Attempting to kill me while settling for just emotional assault only invites misunderstandings, doesn’t it? People say actions speak louder than words, and actions are proof of the heart.”
“I didn’t do that!”
“Right? I trusted you, Duchess. But since we don’t have any evidence yet, we should work hard to uncover who has each other’s backs.”
Narcissi’s throat closed up at Eliya’s smiling face.
Such a creepy kid.
It’s hard to believe she’s only thirteen.
“Rest assured, I’ll uncover the truth behind everything, by any means necessary. So, you better shape up.”
“I’ll keep it in mind.”
Narcissi stomped out angrily.
Eliya’s smile vanished completely.
She felt exhausted.
The banquet continued deep into the night.
Until shortly before, Eliya had been harassed among the nobles.
As she stroked the doll, her hands froze.
“The doll…”
She had never received one before, nor had she ever wanted one.
It’s the type of thing children her age would enjoy.
But not for her.
It’s too childish and…
No, a long time ago, it seems like she liked them a bit…
Eliya shook her head, pushing out the childish thoughts.
She reminded herself that she needed to be more mature than others.
Yet, she wouldn’t let go of the doll.
“The butler in charge of accumulating the gifts tonight, what’s his name?”
“His name is Haz.”
“There wasn’t any instruction to reject gifts, was there?”
“That’s right.”
“Doesn’t he know his place? Let Miguel handle it and punish him.”
“Understood.”
Eliya subconsciously continued stroking the doll and let out a shallow sigh.
Being a bastard, there was no one truly loyal to her.
Even small thorns of unnecessary friction arise.
If she’s going to do what she plans for the future, having more allies would still be insufficient.
“My lady. It’s almost your bedtime.”
“Yeah.”
Eliya stood up from her seat.
She didn’t let go of the doll she was holding.
She didn’t like it, wouldn’t like it, but, well, it wasn’t bad enough to let go.
Ria washed her up, dressed her in fluffy pajamas, and dried and combed her hair without the doll leaving her embrace.
After seeing Eliya lay down in bed, Ria turned off the light.
“Have a peaceful night, Lady Eliya.”
Eliya simply closed her eyes, still hugging the doll.
Not long after, Eliya slowly rose from her bed.
‘I can’t sleep.’
It’s something that happens from time to time.
She had taken the medicine prescribed by Mei, who was a physician.
A medicine for when she struggled with insomnia.
After that, sleep still eluded her, and Eliya finally left her bedroom.
“My lady?”
The guard keeping watch by the door turned to look at her.
“I can’t sleep. Call for Ria.”
“Yes, understood.”
Soon, Ria came out from the adjacent room.
“Lady Eliya?”
“I’m going to study.”
“…Understood. Where will you go?”
“To the magic lab.”
The magic lab was located in a secluded area of the mansion.
It was a place where Eliya practiced magic all alone.
Due to its potential dangers, it was built far from the main mansion.
Also, not just anyone could enter the lab.
It was easy to get hurt if one were to get involved in magical experiments.
“If you need anything, please pull the signal rope.”
“Okay.”
Ria left for the waiting room, which was a building one section over.
Eliya opened the door to the lab.
Although it was a lab, it was spacious enough to serve as a house.
There were countless books stacked on the low bookshelves.
And there was evidence of study left on the big desk in the center of the lab.
Open books, flasks, and glass jars she had experimented with.
She had often experimented with alcohol or oils and sulfur-containing liquids to control fire more strongly.
Eliya hung a lantern by the entrance and stepped inside.
Igniting candles one by one with a spark from her finger, she began her studies.
The history of magic, the manifestation systems.
She read and understood various theoretical texts.
While she had been attempting to elicit magic according to those theories for a long time, it wasn’t easy.
Still too small to kill someone or protect herself.
Today’s reading was about the history of fire magic and its lineage.
Its origins trace back to the Bevel and Helios families…
And then suddenly.
“Lady Eliya.”
Someone entered without knocking.
It was Marchioness Sardis, one of her home tutors.
Moreover, he was also the man she had requested to be replaced by Narcissi last time.
Every time his gaze landed on Eliya, she felt a creep crawl over her skin.
The tall, slender man approached with the slyness of a snake.
“What are you doing up so late, all alone?”
*
“Judas… where are you going?”
I woke up.
Maybe it was the excessive eating that was causing trouble in my stomach.
“To the bathroom…”
“It’s cold outside…”
Hearing Dillon’s mumble from the bed next to me, I wrapped myself in a nearby red blanket.
‘Why is there a bathroom outside in this annex…’
February nights were indeed cold.
As I headed to the bathroom, I saw Eliya in the distance.
She was dressed in fuzzy pajamas, holding the doll I gave her.
‘What is she doing at this hour?’
She entered a building ahead.
Ria, the maid, went into another building nearby.
From her attire, it seemed she didn’t have any official engagements.
Did she come out just to study alone?
‘It’s her birthday, and she’s still busy at such a late hour…’
Eliya brought to mind the scene I’d seen earlier that day.
Eliya, separated from her family.
The fact that she’s a bastard.
“Huff…”
Letting out a sigh, my breath turned into fog as it dissipated.
I felt uneasy. Somehow.
When I finished my business in the bathroom and came out, I saw someone entering the building Eliya had just gone into.
A tall, slender figure.
His pale complexion resembled that of a snake.
‘…Who is he?’
He was a face I didn’t recognize.
Given the past setting, there were many unknown characters around.
Late at night.
A small building with a candle lit in solitude away from the main house.
Inside was Eliya.
A certain man visiting her.
Since I learned Eliya was a bastard, every aspect of this mansion felt uncomfortable and unsettling.
‘Who’s worried about whom… after all, I…’
The little Eliya, similar yet strangely different from the one I knew.
A birthright intertwined with the evidence of abuse.
Facts unknown to me.
Past moments I was unaware of.
And one overlapping, yet different past.
An authoritative senior in the same sports field. A coach, a director.
Ordinary girls and boys my age, or even younger kids.
The story isn’t limited to the sport I practiced.
I did my best back then.
Yet, in the end, nothing changed…
“…Damn it, seriously!”
I scratched my head.
I hate using my head, and dredging up unpleasant memories made it worse.
‘No, I’ve got to do something, or I’ll just feel uneasy and won’t sleep.’
I have to confirm. Surely, nothing will happen.
I just need to find out who that man is and what relation he has with Eliya, and why he’s here.
I moved silently, using [Stealth Steps] as I approached the building.
*
“Ugh!”
Marchioness Sardis shouted as if punishing Eliya.
The small hand reaching for the signal rope was caught by him.
“Let go!”
Eliya thrashed, conjuring fire with her other hand.
But the flame quickly extinguished at his beckoning.
She couldn’t defeat him with magic.
That man was Eliya’s magic tutor.
“If you create such a commotion, it won’t end well.”
Marchioness Sardis restrained both of Eliya’s hands.
“A moment will suffice, just a moment…”
Eliya’s trembling eyes met Sardis’.
That gaze had always looked resentfully at her.
His glistening, desire-filled eyes turned dark.
She felt a wave of terror.
If swallowed, she would be erased.
Time slid by slowly.
Her consciousness drifted away from reality.
She turned to glance back.
Her past was a thorny path.
Walking on thorns laid by others.
Although she walked silently, she hadn’t done so without bleeding.
It wasn’t that it didn’t hurt.
Even when her soles turned ragged, she just bore it in silence.
A straight line of thorny path.
Reflected in a lake of blood, she curled into a ball.
Hugging her knees, she cried.
In a trembling voice she cried out,
“I’m scared. I’m scared.
What are you going to do to me?
Please, don’t do this to me…”
The raw emotions revealing her true self.
With nowhere to turn, powerless, terrified, she wept for herself.
Her weak self was disgusting.
Because of that, she buried it beneath.
But she didn’t eradicate it.
If that weak self was erased, would she forget even the precious memories left behind?
Those memories held the last colors of her experiences.
Sardis’ hand approached.
‘How weak I am, to this extent.’
No one was there to help her.
Her life had always been this way.
No, there had been one.
But he was now dead.
The Bevel family killed him.
The world killed him.
Since that moment, she had been alone.
When she realized this, her heart ached.
Her breathing quickened.
“Mom…”
If I must erase everything.
If I have to trample and burn even the last seed of my emotions.
If I can gain the strength to kill others by killing myself…
“I’ll kill.”
Though she was scared, she was willing to kill herself.
Within her consciousness.
Rational Eliya drew her sword.
While emotional Eliya sobbed, the blade was directed at her own throat.
The red eyes symbolizing the Bevel family.
Within it, orange flickered like a wave.
The central pupil shone bright golden.
That pupil, reminiscent of yellow, resembled the sun.
Tears flowed from the sun.
Tears emitted by the amalgamation of malice, longing, resentment, and sorrow.
While her eyes wept, her lips curved into a clear smile.
The changes on display caused Sardis to involuntarily inhale sharply.
“Don’t tell me…!”
Just when Eliya was about to slit the throat of weak Eliya.
Boom!
The door burst open with a thunderous crash.
Sardis and Eliya both turned their heads simultaneously.
A boy barged in through the door.
Judas glared at Sardis with his golden eyes tightly clenched.