The Broken Prince's Love

To be honest, Cedar had no idea why he suddenly agreed to talk about this. He had no problem with that part of his past. It had only been a little inconvenience, which would sound much more problematic than it had been for him. He just didn't like mentioning it because he wasn't sure what kind of reactions he would get.

The only reason he spoke about it now was because Lucille had been the one who wanted to know it. Maybe because he felt indebted to her. Maybe because he felt sorry for bringing her into this uncomfortable situation. Maybe because he just believed that she was trustworthy, at least more than anyone he had met in a long time. Most likely, it was because he currently needed Lucille to trust him so that she wouldn't throw him out. He wasn't sure why he decided to speak, but he had agreed to tell her, and now he would have to follow through.

Cedar ate a bit of his dinner before beginning his story. “As I said, it's not anything important, but it made me dislike Lady Peril. You probably heard that that woman was close to my mother already. There isn't much to say except for the fact that her family hoped to gain my help in case I became emperor. Maybe they wanted to become a dukedom, maybe they needed help for their stores. I don't know for sure. But they did support us for a long time. This was before the first assassination attempt on my brother, by the way. And back then, Lady Peril often showed up to talk to us, no matter what kind of event was going on. When she begins talking, she doesn't always stop, and that made her annoying enough. But what was worse was that she was too ambitious.”

He paused to take a few bites again. In the meantime, he mentally went through the conversations with Lady Peril in the past and quickly pushed those thoughts away again. Jenna truly wasn't a pleasant person, which Cedar tried to explain now.

“She had always wanted to gain a bit more than just my mother's support. Apparently, her goal was to become a mistress of a member of the royal family. Something like that can help people a lot if they want to improve their businesses since asking your lover to agree to some business proposal is easier than asking a stranger. Maybe she even wanted more than that. I am unsure. In any case, she didn't really hide her intentions, so she wasn't a person I wanted to talk with.” He took a break and watched as Lucille's expression cycled through different emotions.

It took her a few seconds before she seemed to understand the problematic part. “But that was...seven years ago.” Lucille furrowed her brows and tightened her hold on her utensils. She was silent for a moment and pressed her lips into a thin line. Then she couldn't hold back anymore. “Please tell me that she wanted to impress your brother.”

Cedar calmly finished his piece of steak before replying with a smile. “I thought that exact same thing. Unfortunately, that wasn't her plan. I don't know why she didn't approach the young emperor. That would have made much more sense. But she didn't seem to like Theodore that much. My mother wasn't interesting to her either, and my father was dead. That only left one person. She gave up after a few times though. It wasn't that bad.”

Apparently, Lucille was much angrier about this than he had been. She gritted her teeth and let go of her fork to ball her fists. “What do mean it wasn't so bad? You were fifteen back then! And she was how old? She is around thirty now!”

Cedar slowly finished chewing the portion in his mouth before naming the correct ages. “I was fourteen. She was around twenty-three, I think. But as I said, she didn't do much. It was only for three months, and then she understood that I wasn't interested. She left me alone ever since. So, it's fine.” He hadn't really thought about it much either. The only result of that time had been him disliking Lady Peril, even if it had lasted a bit longer than three months. But he wasn't traumatized or anything like that, and Jenna hadn't done much after being told that he wanted her to leave him alone. There was no real need to get panicked, was there?

Still, Lucille narrowed her eyes and raised her voice. “That's not fine at all! How could anyone even try to approach such a young boy? She was an adult, and you were a child! I know that there are arranged marriages that are being consummated at the age of sixteen, but that's still not alright. She was nine years older than you! She definitely wanted to use your inexperience to get you to do whatever she liked.”

Jenna had tried exactly that. She had hoped that a young boy, who hadn't ever been in a relationship and hadn't had a fiancée either, would fall for her charms easily. That had probably been one of the only moments in which Cedar being extremely mature for his age had helped him. He hadn't gotten flustered but had quickly understood and asked Jenna to stop touching him ‘on accident’. After that, she had tried to talk to him for a few months and had then finally ‘given up’ after not being allowed to get closer.

To Cedar, this had been more annoying than upsetting, but to Lucille, this seemed like an absolute nightmare. No matter how often he told her that he wasn't really affected by those events, she still condemned Lady Peril over and over again. Even as he mentioned the rumors about Jenna having grown up in a quite troubled house with a hateful stepmother and an even worse father, Lucille remained furious and said that this wasn't an excuse.

To be honest, Cedar was a bit relieved about that though. Quite a few people had asked him why he hadn't accepted Lady Peril even though she was a beautiful woman who showed interest in him. His own mother just told him to deal with it without upsetting their ally too much. At least she had said that, only to fume behind closed doors. Afterward, Lady Peril had made sure to hide her attempts from the dowager empress, so it seemed like Camille had gotten pretty angry. But even his mother had never openly told him that Jenna had been the one doing something wrong. So, it was nice to hear that Lucille felt like that had been as weird as he had perceived it back then.

Cedar gave his best to explain everything in a way that wouldn't make her see the situation from an overly emotional angle, but she still seemed to be upset. And he was strangely content with that. Yet, he was also happy when they moved on to the next topic and talked about something else. After all, he didn't like thinking about annoying things over and over again. Still, he couldn't help but ponder the conversation when Lucille was about to leave. He brought her to the door and gave her a little smile before saying goodbye to her. “I wish you a good night. Rest well.”

Lucille nodded at him and smiled back. “You too. I hope that you will have a good night's sleep. Until tomorrow.” She was about to turn around and leave when he spoke without really wanting to.

“You are a really kind person.” Cedar definitely hadn't wanted to say that, so he froze a bit when those words left his mouth. Of course, he didn't show it on his face and kept smiling at the woman in front of him. He rarely messed up like this, but then again, his comment shouldn't trouble him. In fact, this could even work out for him.

Lucille was visibly taken aback by his words. “Why are you saying that? I'm not doing anything special. There is no reason for you to think that I'm kind.”

Cedar had to admit that her confused expression was a bit adorable while he spoke in the softest tone he managed to use. “Of course, you are kind. You took me in even though this causes so many problems for you. And you didn't just drag me into this room to lock me in either. You come here every day and bring me food and talk to me. You even gave me a few books to busy myself with. You talk to me without just believing all of the rumors, which is rather pleasant too. And you got angry for my sake, even though I wasn't that upset. That is more than most around me did when it came to that topic. You are a very considerate person. You can give yourself more credit for that. Thank you. I think I haven't said it often enough. Goodnight, Lucille.” He had said much more than he had wanted to add to that, but this ended up being the perfect little speech. So, he just smiled at her baffled expression before closing the door.

Then Cedar leaned his back against the door frame and stared at the ceiling. It sounded like Lucille took a moment before she walked away from the room. She had probably been as surprised by his words as he had. He truly shouldn't have said that so impulsively. Sure, his words had been chosen somewhat well aside from a few small hiccups, but there was still an issue. From the very beginning, he shouldn't have told her anything about his past when it didn't aid his goal. He shouldn't admit what annoyed him to a stranger, and he also couldn't be this open about his likes and dislikes unless he wanted to face backlash.

What was he doing here? Did he seriously want to trust a person just because she had been nice to him for a few days? That was ridiculous.

Cedar let out a huff and let his smile drop for a moment as he drew in a deep breath. He couldn't allow anything to distract him right now. He was only here because he needed to wait for his recovery. Once his wound was all good, he would leave immediately and take care of his goal. Lucille being here was just convenient. He talked to her because he had nothing else to do and not because she was always interested in what he said and listened without any biases. So, he shouldn't be glad when she visited him. He needed time to train and to plan out his future actions after all. Now that Lucille had gone to sleep, he should immediately begin doing all of that.

The prince's smile returned as he thought about training. Practicing a few swings sounded good right now. Then he could test out how much his wound had improved in the past few days. And he could also get rid of his vented frustration about people that always saw him as a tool that could gain them something and not a human being. People like his own mother, his father, Lady Peril and almost everyone from his faction.

Cedar stepped away from the door and prepared to take his sword. But as soon as he arrived at the chest and reached behind it, he saw a person moving from the corner of his eye.

Already?

He let out a little sigh and stood up again. Apparently, he could forget training today unless he wanted to reduce his sleeping time even more. Cedar walked to the balcony without hesitation and glanced outside. The area behind the building was empty as always, so he could go out. He opened the door abruptly and stepped forward to lean against the railing.

Next to him, something inside the tree rustled, and Reeve almost fell down. He only caught himself because he hugged the tree and then raised his voice. “You! Why did you have to scare me like that? I wanted to give you a good-”

Cedar extended his hand toward him and cut him off. “Give me the letter and leave. You can't come here so often, or we will risk you being found. I told you that I will need some time to decide how to move from now on. So, I can't give a reply yet. I will just take her letter and put it to the others.”

Reeve pouted at that and shuffled around before leaning forward. He was almost a bit too reckless this time since the branch below him seemed awfully unstable. But he didn't care about that and just complained. “You were the one who proposed writing letters.”

“I did. But I also thought that you would be intelligent enough to bring them in secret. Would you at least hide behind a branch if you want to sit around here? Last time, you did hide, but today you seem to have forgotten everything again. You almost fell down after wanting to scare me. Why did you even try that? If I was surprised, it wouldn't have been good. What if I yelled and alerted someone?” He wouldn't ever do that, but it brought the point across.

Reeve finally listened and leaned his back against the bark so that he sat more securely. He crossed his arms and glared at the prince. “That wouldn't happen. I never managed to scare you. You always seem to know where I hide, and you find me before I can even move. Maybe it's because you aren't human. You must have some kind of special ability.” No, it was simply because Reeve was very bad at sneaking up on people.

Cedar inwardly sighed at that, but he just smiled. “Maybe it's because you're an idiot too. You're horrible at keeping your mouth shut. I would like to replace you, but we don't have anyone else that is able to climb a tree. That just makes it obvious how low on resources we are running right now.”

Reeve's mouth fell open at that. “What? How mean!” He brought his hand to his heart and acted as if he had been wounded by an arrow. Then he slouched on the branch, which actually made Cedar worry about him falling down. Reeve pretended to be dead for a few seconds before sitting up again. He pursed his lips and prepared to defend his honor. “I'm actually quite capable. It's just problematic when the prince is better than any of the guards that could be assigned to him. Besides, this tree is really slippery. I told you that, didn't I?”

Cedar held his hand toward the other man. “I know. You keep reminding me of that whenever you fall down. Will you give me the letter now? I fear that you may end up breaking all of your bones if you keep moving around that much. Don't be like a child that ignores their parents' advice only to end up whining when you get hurt.”

The guard pretended to sulk and looked to the side for a moment, but then he gave up. He pulled out an envelope and handed it to the prince. “Here. I managed to convince Her Majesty to delay it a few days. She wanted to send many more letters, but I told her that it might be more convincing if she writes a few complex ones. Surprisingly, she listened to me. But that was the only time that I dared to talk to her.”

Cedar took the letter and ripped the envelope open while speaking. “I assume that Mother is getting more unstable. Did she have a few fits in the past weeks? How many of those were serious?”

Reeve pondered it for a moment and held up his fingers to count. “After my last visit, there was that incident...and that one and...” He paused and counted again. “I think there were three serious ones out of the five or six times. That only proves that she is getting more upset with every second. I feel like she really misses you by now and wants you to come back. She should have written that down too. But I doubt that her tone will be nice here. After all...”

The prince finished the sentence for him. “After all, that's not the type of person she is. And I'm sure that she proved this in this letter once again.” He looked down to start reading.

It was exactly what he had expected. The letter was aggressive enough to show everyone that the dowager empress was upset. His mother wrote like she would sound if she was right in front of him, which meant that even her writing seemed like she was yelling at him. She told her son that he had to come back repeatedly without asking anything about whether he was doing well.

This was just perfect.

“It seems like she is eagerly awaiting my return. But I will have to disappoint her again. After all, I still haven't recovered.” Cedar lowered the letter and smiled at Reeve. “This time, I won't write a letter, just to show that I'm ignoring her. Let's see what reaction that will cause. I will tell you what you should convey to her. It's rather obvious. Just say that I won't come back right now. My wound still hurts, and it will take a while until it recovers completely.” He paused for a moment, and his smile widened as he said the most important part. “And to be honest, I'm not even sure whether I want to return at all. I'm rather content being outside of confinement. You can't imagine how good it feels to go without her tantrums.”

Reeve shrugged. “I feel like everyone at the mansion can understand you there. You usually deal with her anger, so it's logical that you would get annoyed at some point. But I feel like you are condemning some servants by saying all of that. Her Majesty would be really upset about hearing something like this, right? So, she will have to vent her frustration. And since you aren't there, she will target those around her. After I tell her, I will definitely stay clear of the mansion for a month or so. And I should make sure not to speak to her while she is eating. I don't want her to throw a knife or hot tea at me.”

Cedar let out a huff as he imagined that. “I could see something like that happening. You should stay away from the kitchen. And make sure to look around before you tell her that. The servants there all work for Theodore.” He paused for a moment before adding the rest. “We wouldn't want rumors to spread, so keep that in mind. Understood?”

Reeve smirked at him and saluted. “Yes, Sir. I would never forget something as crucial as that. If this goes wrong, I will lose my head, so I will make sure to do my best. I will definitely deliver a satisfying performance, even if I'm just an unimportant side character.”

“You're saying strange things again. Maybe it's a bit too late for you. If you get tired, make sure to climb off the tree before falling asleep. I don't want anyone to find your corpse here. It's only the second floor, but I would trust you to get seriously hurt if you mess up. So, it would be better for you to leave now. You gave me the letter, and now you'll bring back my response.”

Reeve sighed and slowly shuffled around before he stood up on his feet. “Alright, alright. I get it. You don't want me to disturb your honeymoon. Go have some fun with that redhead. And please don't shove me off the tree for that joke.” He hugged the branch next to him to underline his words.

Cedar pushed himself away from the railing and watched his guard for a moment. Reeve didn't seem to be unstable, so he probably wouldn't fall off, which was relieving. “It's good that you at least understand that I won't find such jokes funny. If Mother hears this, there will be dead people. Now hurry off before I decide that I want to show you how unamusing that joke was.”

Reeve almost jumped away, but he still held on to the tree. “Don't worry. I wouldn't dare to stay anywhere close to you after saying something like that. I will leave in a second. There is just one more thing.” Reeve lifted his index finger before reaching into his jacket. He moved his hands around before pulling out a small package. He raised it to show it to the prince before throwing it to the other man, who caught it effortlessly. “It's just a triviality, so don't get mad. I know that you don't like this, but I wanted to give this to you anyway. It's for tomorrow. I won't congratulate you already since doing this too early gives you bad luck, so I wrote a small note for you. I would like to personally come, but I feel like that will be too obvious.”

Cedar held back a groan as he stared at the package and quickly put it into his pocket. “I should have guessed that you wouldn't forget it for my sake. You know that I don't really see the need to celebrate that day. It didn't do anything good for anyone. There is no need for you to give me anything.”

Reeve already moved onto another branch as he responded. “Don't be like that. It was a wonderful day for the whole world, and everyone around you should celebrate it. It's fine if you don't want anything grand, but I insist on giving you a gift at least.” He turned around once more and gave the other man a smile. “Then I will take my leave now, Your Royal Highness. Enjoy your special day.”

Cedar held back another complaint. “Hurry now. Goodnight. I hope that you won't come too early again. You need to wait at least a week, remember?”

The guard lifted his hand and waved over his shoulder. “Yes, yes. I know. Goodnight.” With that, he climbed up the tree while getting closer to the edge of the property. He carefully jumped over to another tree and then got onto the wall before leaving the estate.

The prince watched him for a bit before he returned to the bedroom. He put the letter to the other one before bringing the package to the chest in which he stored all of his items. He would probably open it in a few days but not tomorrow. His birthday didn't really give him a reason to celebrate, so he wouldn't see this as a gift for that. But he would have to get something for Reeve in return to avoid owing him something. At least he would need to do that when he was able to move around somewhat freely again.

Cedar gazed at the clock and decided to train for a few minutes before sleeping. He didn't even leave the room and only practiced a bit in the center. When he was done, it was later than he had hoped it to be. So, he washed himself and went to bed immediately. As always, he slept better after training and managed to rest without having any dreams of his past.

That made it even more surprising that Cedar almost fell out of his bed the next morning. He shot up as soon as footsteps sounded in the hallway.

Those were way too loud to be Lucille's. He was pretty sure that he heard her footsteps too, but she was accompanied by a man and another person since three people were coming.

Cedar took a moment before he managed to identify Viscount Valerian's voice. Apparently, there was a fight going on. It sounded like it was a very serious one, and the voices came closer and closer. There wasn't any time to go hide somewhere. This could only mean one thing.

Cedar let out a sigh and stood up before putting on a radiant smile. It seemed like he would have to face someone unpleasant in a moment. As expected, his birthday would never be a nice day.

Barely a second passed before the door flew open, and a person marched in.