Soul Bound

1              Soul Bound

1.1            Finding her Feet

1.1.5          An Inscrutable Mastermind

1.1.5.12       Cooking m'steak

Kafana took them in the side entrance at the Speckled Dove. Other than Wellington (who was in his ‘respectable merchant’ gear), they were still dressed in the hard wearing travel clothes they’d been given by Dante at Villa Landi. They looked most out of place among the customers at the Wren, and Kafana remembered her contractual obligation to not damage the reputation of the establishment. Damn, they really would have to splash out on clothes from an upmarket tailor, and soon.

When they entered, Columbina was showing an assistant how she wanted a large tomato cut. Her movements were deft and economical, producing in seconds a flower with two nested sets of petals. She added a very fine drizzle of dressing that left it looking like it was bespeckled with dew, then turned to Kafana:

“Kafana, my blue-haired blizzard of gossip-fodder. Do you know what they are saying of you today?”

Kafana shook her head, slightly intimidated by the dripping knife being pointed at her.

Columbina noticed her reaction and licked the knife with the tip of her tongue, like a cat, before throwing it hard to the side without taking her eyes off Kafana, where it stuck quivering in a chopping board next to the sink. “Mmm, honey and chive vinaigrette. Balances the tang quite well.”

“They are saying” she continued, “that you’ve been spending your time in some forge, making dirty big swords. Not even cooking knives.” she put heart-rending emotion into her voice for the next bit and gestured expressively, ending with her hands clasped in front of her chest “If you are going to slave over a hot fire, it should be mine you chain yourself to.” she pouted and cocked her head “When are you going to come cook for me, hmm?”

Bungo saved her from replying: “Bravo, bravo! Harlequin himself could not have produced a more riveting performance. You are the queen, and every stage your throne.”

Columbina turned a sharp smile on him: “Untrue, but flattering. And I shall not be diverted.” she turned back to Kafana, but before she could try again, Tomsk stepped forwards:

“You are everything I have been told and more, and behold, we do not come empty handed. We bring you such a device as does not yet grace any House or Guild in all Torello”

Alderney took her cue, and produced the gelato churn.

Columbina sighed and said gently: “Kafana, your defenders are most loyal, and I feel that if I took one more step towards you, these other gentlemen” she waved towards Bulgaria and Wellington “Would also leap in to your defence. Which is as things should be. At least they know a man’s place. But I am not angry at you. I just want you to know how much I’m looking forwards to our next session, apprentice.” she looked charmingly and winsomely at Kafana, and even blinked her long eyelashes at her.

Kafana laughed. “You are impossible. Which is exactly how a woman should be. And I intend to come very soon. On Racday wain morning, in fact. Furthermore, if you would like to get to know myself and these fine scoundrels better, I have also come to invite you to the very first practice of a new sport. It favours those who are agile and dexterous, and if the practice goes well, we shall launch it on Covday wax and every eye in Torello shall be upon you, including all who consider themselves fashionable and well informed.”

“But I am forgetting my manners. Let me present to you my noble defenders, Tomsk Capitano, Wellington Fiducia, Bungo the Flash, Bulgaria the Great and last but not least the fastest crafter in all the lands, who does six impossible things before breakfast every day, the astonishingly incomparable Alderney Velocità herself!”

“And they are starving. In the midst of all this culinary splendour, they stand unfed and unwatered.” Kafana put a touch of tragedy into her own voice, like she’d been found guilty of kicking puppies.

She was getting into her role now. Damned if she’d be out-thespianed by this acrobat. “And I, all I did was come to this, the haven of my mentor, to beg a little space in her kitchen that I might prepare for them a hasty bowl of soup, or perhaps a scraped carrot, and what do I get?” she drew herself up, glad of her avatar’s height “Knives! I get threatened with knives.” she half turned, held an arm across her eyes, and choked out a little sob.

Bulgaria threw himself at Kafana’s feet, arms begging, “No, my saviour, don’t kill yourself over this rejection, you’re my only hope!”

Wellington picked up a carrot from a nearby table and held it to his own throat like a knife: “Let me sacrifice myself to appease her wrath that with my life I might pay the blood-geld for our sins.”

Tomsk snatched the carrot from Wellington’s hand: “Stay brother, if one must die, let it be not you, who brings a contract to this establishment worth more than a carriage full of gold coins and emeralds the size of duck eggs.” Looking Columbina directly in the eyes, he threw the carrot sideways. Her gaze followed it, to find it neatly cut in two by the knife sticking up from the board by the sink.

Columbina relaxed and gave a genuine smile. “Pleased to meet you all. I would love to carry on playing right now, but I have meals to cook and serve. So, Kafana, the kitchen is yours, use what ingredients you want, but I shall inspect and critique your results when you serve them to your friends, who will hopefully stay out of trouble and install that elegant machine in the cold larder down those stairs. I accept your invitation to join the practice, and I think at least one team playing it at the launch should be representing the Speckled Dove.”

Alderney: “Terms accepted! I want a costume that matches yours. We’ll be playing against Tomsk and Bungo over there, and we are so going to dominate them.”

Columbina: “Until then. Give my regards to Harlequin if you see him. He tells me he loaned you a pendant from his personally owned collection, which is utterly unheard of. I’d sooner have believed that the members of the council all transmuted into chickens.” She turned back to the assistant, now moving hastily to make up for the lost time.

Kafana handed the silver case containing a +3 ring and the +5 pendant to Alderney. “While I cook lunch, would you like to bounce over to Harlequin’s shop? Wellington can give you directions.”

Wellington handed Alderney the other +3 ring, and a sheet torn from Flavio’s pad on which he’d written a detailed receipt. “Do not hand them over until he has returned the stone of truth, which you should check is the genuine one by saying something true and something false, and he has checked the three items and signed the receipt to absolve us from any wear, tear or damages to them. Oh, and double check yourself to make sure you don’t have any of his jewellery upon you before walking out of the shop.”

Alderney grinned, wickedly. “He likes games, huh?” Wellington looked dubious, but gave her directions and she headed out.

“I hope she’ll be ok. It looks like she thinks she can get the better of him.”

Bulgaria raised an eyebrow at Wellington: “Do you suppose the game system is capable of listening to such comments and taking irony into account when devising plot?”

Bungo laughed. “Raising flags? They tried playing around with that on Divine Mountain. ‘It would be tragic for me to win this lottery, because I hate being rich. I’ll just buy one ticket. What could possibly go wrong? Winning is a one in a million chance. It can’t possibly happen to me.’ “

Tomsk: “And did the player trying that get rich? Or more likely, get attacked by a horde of monsters lured by the scent of his particular ticket, or something?”

Bungo: “Nope. At least no more than average. But deities seem to be playing a far bigger part in this Sacred Blood release, and it would make sense for them to be able to do that sort of stuff. So, perhaps don’t voice things that might sound like they’re challenging fate or the deities’ ingenuity when in a Sanctum or standing next to a priest?”

Tomsk visibly edged away from Kafana, who was busy preparing ingredients.

Wellington: “Perhaps the game uses the tiaras to sense when someone is trying to manipulate the system, and it only makes dramatic use of death flags when they were uttered unintentionally?”

Bungo: “You’re trying to scare me now, aren’t you?”

Kafana: “Stop horsing around. This is a working kitchen. Guys, go install the churn. Make sure there’s room around it to turn the handle and to store the Dewars. Then come back and see if you can work out how to use magic to improve the quality of the ingredients I’ve laid out. I have some steaks to prepare.”

She was going to go with a simple style. Not too many ingredients, but the right ones, prepared in the best way she could. She’d concentrate on taste and presentation, with magic secondary. But if she could, she’d put in a nice big buff to STR, with perhaps a little CON as secondary. From what she’d heard of Gregorio, he watched his diet as seriously as any professional body builder, so high on lean protein and nutrition, low on carbs. And since the party were about to head off into combat, she’d save time by doing the same for all of them.

While the steaks were warming up and soaking in the seasoning, she checked out the kitchen’s supplies with an eye to gelato, and wrote a note for Columbina requesting her to obtain more milk chocolate and prepare a few jugs of condensed milk.

When the guys returned, she sang her skill buff, and followed by playing her learning buff. Then she watched carefully with mage sight while Bungo and Wellington managed to improve the quality of her ingredients. She asked System to record the rune diagram carved in the air by Wellington, so she could later display it as an overlay and try using it herself.

[Skill acquired “Improve ingredient quality”]

She showed Tomsk exactly how she wanted the vegetables cut and laid out on the plate, set Bungo to vigorously mix a dressing, and Wellington to work out a drizzle pattern that would help focus casting a buff upon the meals.

[Skill acquired “Aura of Authority”]

{System, are you saying I’m being bossy?}

[The ability to boss people around well is a useful one, Kafana. But what the Aura of Authority does isn’t skill at leading. It is presence. When you assume the mantle, it looks well upon you. People will pay attention to what you say, and be less likely to question your right to say it.]

{Thank you, System. *hugs*}

Right, time to get cooking. She checked the temperature gradient of the grill pan and set the steaks to searing at the hottest end. Where had Bulgaria gone? That man was always wandering off in secret. Well, if his food got cold, that would be his fault.

She’d trimmed off all the fat she could, but she still wanted to get more out if she could. She set the other side to searing. “Bungo, transfer that to a pouring jug now, please, and pass it to Wellington. Tomsk, prepare a little garnish to sit on top of the steak if you could.”

Right, now move them down to the cooler end. She’d cut the steaks thick. Hmm, she’d just got time to have a go at asking Cov to remove any poisons or diseases. She set a strict time limit on the spell so she didn’t spend too long casting it, then took out her pendant, closed her eyes, and sang a heartfelt wordless prayer. Mana went out of her and, even with her eyes closed, she felt her still active mage sight detect a fish being prepared a couple of stations over become purer.

She opened her eyes, and turned the steaks, then called out to catch Columbina’s attention:

“Columbina!” she pointed “That fish, the one being prepared by the dark haired lass. It wasn’t fit for consumption. I think Cov may have fixed it, but please double check before you let it anywhere near a customer.” Backs stiffened around the room, and assistants sprang out of the way as Columbina made a beeline for the offending fish. Kafana tuned out the oncoming drama, and returned to her cooking.