Side Note

Hi, it's the girl sitting on the dirt road and drawing pictures with a stick, Madeleine here. I've drawn a picture of naked Mel. Although I'm sure, I got the finer details wrong, I know for certain that I got her ass right. I stare at it a lot, as we know. Speaking of Mel, she's in the middle of a shootout. It's her vs the… 

"What did they call themselves again?"

"The Sultans of Swing."

"Thanks Mel! Are you winning?"

"There's still one left, but we should be fine."

"Aight."

You're probably wondering how this shootout is working out and how it started, huh? Well, right now, Mel and I are taking cover behind the car, which is surprisingly bulletproof. Then again, it did take a beating from that giant cosmic rock lobster. She's shooting at them with her bow, and looks really cool while doing so. Why aren't I doing anything? They have an anti-magic field set up where they are, and I don't feel like throwing daggers.

As for the enemy, they have guns. Lots of guns. Two guns per sultan. What's a sultan? I have no idea, but they've got a funky carriage being pulled by something called a camel. Those sound as fake as lemons, except I have tasted lemons… bleh. Speaking of guns, the gun I stole from that red guy disappeared! My hard-fought victory trophy! Oh yeah, you're probably wondering about our driver, right? She's swinging on a swing she brought from one of the sultans. I should probably explain the sultans, right?

Well, the first sultan is a Sultan of Swing, he sells swings, the second Sultan of Swing plays swing, the third Sultan of Swing swings things (except guns, he shoots those) and the last Sultan of Swing organizes swingers. 

"Number one is playground equipment, number two is the music genre, number three is the verb, and number four is sex."

"Who are you saying that too?"

"Anyone who needs elaboration." Mel put her bow away. "Anyways, I'm done."

"That finished quickly."

"I'm a good shot." Mel let out a smirk, which I responded with a smile. "Now's the real challenge."

"The real challenge?!"

"Yes…" She turned to Sherry, who was happily swinging on her swingset. "Getting her off. You cut down the supports on the left, I'll cut down the right."

We both walked towards our appointed support beams. Mel took out a dagger she always had dangling around her hip. I'll be honest, I was very tempted to steal it. It's a nice looking dagger. Kind of reminds me of the stuff Christie makes… but better. Huh.

As for me, I took out the dagger that Rika gave as payment. Division should make this really easy. With one swipe, I immediately cut through the two support beams on my side. Sheesh, what a weapon. I looked at Mel's side, and saw she had also done it swiftly. I really want to steal that dagger now. The cut off support beams fell to the ground, yet somehow the swing itself stay upright, as if it were standing on air.

"My swing is unbeatable!" Sherry sped up her swinging, aiming to go around.

"Well…" Mel looked at the floating swingset, confounded. She turned to me, her face still showing confusion. "Any ideas?"

"Hmm… we could freeze the swing chains?"

"You think you can hit the thin chains at the speed she's making it move?"

I look back at Sherry and notice she had significantly sped up, now doing circles on the swing. How did she even go that fast? "Not even friction and air resistance can beat me!"

Well, I can still hit it. I took out a freezing dagger from my dagger dimension, took aimed, and threw it, only for it to be intercepted by a diving bird. What?

"What?"

"Even my luck can't be beaten!"

"Huh."

"What now?"

"I'll handle this." We heard a rustle from a nearby bush (Did I mention we were in a forest now? I'm surprised there's still a forest around during the end of the world) and out came Rika, who I just remembered was also in the car with us before the Sultans of Swing tried hijacking our car because their camels died. 

"Where were you?" Mel eyed her with suspicion. I get it, Rika kinda reminds me of Merida, and we all know how that ended up.

"I was taking a piss."

"Oh." Mel embarrassingly scratched the back of her neck. "Umm… yeah, do your thing."

"Thanks. Sherry, I bet you can't backflip off the swing."

"Pfft… I've won three thousand, six hundred and eighty-two bets. I can do it easy peasy." Sherry stood up on the still spinning swing, beautifully jumped off, gracefully flipped not once, but twice in the air, then expertly landed on her two fit, her arms stretched out in perfect form. "Voila!"

"Quick girls, destroy the swing set." As soon as Rika said that, I stomped my foot, encasing the floating swing set, which had comically fell to the ground after Sherry flipped off it, in ice, which was immediately shattered by a triple arrow shot by Mel. 

Sherry looked with disbelief at the broken swingset, before taking something out of her pocket. "It's a good thing I buy things in pairs." It was a miniature swing set. "But let's go."

Sherry skipped over to the car, taking her seat in the driver's seat. Mel also went into the car, and before I could, Rika stopped me. 

"Wait a sec." Rika walked over to the unconscious sultans, dragged one over to me, then opened his eyes with her fingers. "Side Note."

"Ooh." I looked into the sultan's purple eyes, finding the Side Note for… Swing?

Huh. What an oddly specific and bloated ability.

Character namesake: Reid Rassitt

Sacred power: Swing

Favourite thing to swing: His wife (Like the dance move, not as a weapon)

Description: The sultan of swing. Reid built a trading empire catered towards children, with his most profitable item being his well-known swings. He also runs some side business that utilise his other talents related to swinging. Due to the constant danger anyone travelling around Mendass faces, when he goes out on business trips, he brings along actors who play the role of a Sultan of Swing. Unfortunately, the end of the world ended up leaving him escort-less, camel-less, and gun-less. By the way, he got the guns as presents from the Golemancer, who appreciated the special swing he made for her golem daughter, and thus gifted him with her latest guns.

Chapter namesake: Sultans of Swing by Dire Straits

pojlk

I had a little break between packing, figured I might as well write a chapter. I should be back to full form next week, so you'll have to wait until then for normal chapter releases.