Side Note

I feel pretty stupid for only just realising this, but Mendass is fucked up, isn't it? It's also getting fucked hard… or at least this section of Mendass… and also Trogen… and also Bellum (Apparently, the zombies have started moving)... and also Garwet… probably the whole world, huh. On the bright side, the newspaper is still being printed. I'm holding one right now. It used to belong to a random fellow that belongs to the RO, but they dropped it when they ran away while the demon and my white-haired shadow clone had a staring contest. A lot of the RO folks ran away, including the water cooler. In my honest opinion, she'd make a great maid. Although, the kind of maid that'd end up becoming a mistress.

Speaking of the end of the world, the article under it is about me! I'm famous! Granted… it's not an article, it's actually a wanted poster. I look good, though. Not as good as Mel's photo, though. Oh yeah, they have the whole gang. Apparently, we're wanted because of our ties to the Seer, which… yeah, makes sense. Well, skip. Time to find the crossword… and my paper got ripped. 

I looked at the commotion that caused my newspaper to rip. You know the scary demon that sent the little kid flying through the roof? Dead, completely dead, positively dead. There's a huge hold in his chest, which sucks since the suit he's wearing is something I'd like to see on Mel. You might be asking about what fighting is going on if that demon is dead. It's shadow clone vs shadow clone! God vs demon! Madeleine vs crossword! That last fight got cancelled because the others accidentally ripped up my newspaper.

I'd join in on the fight, but… seems like a pain. I've been fighting a lot more than usual. The assassins, the bandits, the giant rock lobster… a lot of fighting and chaos recently, and it wasn't even my fault this time. Oh my god, it really isn't my fault for once. 

The people fighting are two of my shadow clones, the Goddess of light and Mammy! I have no idea why the demons are waging war against the Gods, why it's happening here, or why it matters, but what I do know is that I should ask these girls what their relationship is with my daughters. Why am I calling the shadow clones my daughters? Because… umm… comedy? I'm not going to call them my sisters, that'd feel weird. I created them, after all. Wait… an important question just came to mind! I stomp the ground, covering the whole floor in darkness and summoning two whole legions of shadow clones, who circle around the two parties.

"You dare interfere!" Says the shining one, with the white-haired shadow clone next to her. Apparently, that's Xul, the goddess of light. Man, to think one of my shadow clones snatched up a goddess… and also some bigwigs in the church. I see the high priestess outside the building. She tried to get in as soon as she saw I stepped in, but I made a wall of shadow clones to block her.

"Yeah, what's the big deal, Maddy?" Says the golden one, with the not-white-haired shadow clone next to her. That's definitely Mammy, I can tell. The excess of jewellery and the golden gauntlets, plus Ava! I may forget names, but it'd be bad if I forgot my daughters' names.

"Just a quick question. You see, I consider my shadow clones my daughters."

"Wonderful to know."

"Yeah, yeah. What does that have to do with anything?"

"A thought came to mind… are you two my daughter-in-laws?"

"What?"

"Huh?"

"I'll repeat it. Are you two my dau-"

"I understood the query."

"Me too."

"Good. Answer the question."

"Uh… yes? Thanks to me, our union is part of my church's canon."

"Didn't you get the invite to our wedding, Maddy?"

Oh… that explains the whole light and dark union thing they were preaching on the street a while ago… and also the envelope I accidentally set on fire. So it was for a wedding… "Okay, I'm satisfied. You two can go back to fighting."

I tapped the ground, sending the shadow clones back to the Shadowrealm, only living the shadow clones connected to the Goddess and demon, so they could resume their brawl. I thought they go right at it, but they both just stood there, staring at me.

"I always wondered how peculiar the creator of my beloved of mine would be… but to think she's insane enough to stop a fight between a Goddess and a Cardinal Sin for something as simple as a relationship check."

"Well… that's Madeleine for you." Mammy put away her gauntlets. "I don't feel like fighting anymore."

In response, Xul also put away her weapons. "I fight only those willing to fight."

"Oh… no more fighting…" Hmm… I have a wonderful idea! I tap the ground, moving the rubble about to create a table.

"A table?"

"What for?"

"A family dinner!" I create a chair for each of us, signalling to them to sit. The two of them sat, which was when I faced their shadowy partners. "There's probably a kitchen somewhere around here. Go cook something to impress while I do the mother-in-law thing where I either bond with or harass your partners." The two shadow clones looked at each other, shrugged, saluted me, and then left to find a kitchen.

I took a seat, and then at the corner of my eye, I saw Mel entering with the unconscious body of the high priestess on her shoulder. "I'm not going to question what's going on here." She walked over to me, putting the high priestess on the table. "Saw her get knocked out by one of your shadow clones. Look into her eyes real quick. Odds are that she's one."

"Aye aye, captain!" I pry open her eyelids, staring into her emerald eyes.

"Hey there Mammon, and nice to meet you again, Xul." Mel took a seat next to me. "So what's on the menu?"

"No idea. It's up to the shadow clones that are cooking."

"Speaking of the shadow clones, you've got to tell them to not call me mother-in-law. It makes me feel old. I'm not even halfway through my twenties… in this life."

I heard a snicker from Mammy, who then opened her mouth. "Hey there… mother-in-law." She said that with the biggest grin possible.

All Mel could let out was a sigh, which she then went quiet, her eyes closed. A beautiful start to a family dinner. I should ask the other shadow clones to invite their partners. Sounds like a deliciously chaotic dinner.

Character profile: Dinah Lumos

Sacred power: Photokinesis

Harem member number: 3

Description: The high priestess of the church. Dinah is a devout follower of Xul, having been a follower since birth. As her most faithful, she was gifted with Photokinesis, which was originally Xul's. The reason for Xul giving her Sacred Power was so she could spend a mortal life with Light (That's the name she gave to her beloved shadow clone). However, due to the unstable nature of Mendass, Xul somehow retained her godhood, while Dinah was given her Sacred Power, making them co-Gods. Eventually, Dinah was introduced to Light, who then proceeded to seduce her, making her join her increasing harem. 

Chapter namesake: Golden Light by Blonde Redhead

pojlk

I only recently had the thought of "Why am I ending the world, I still have 60 chapters to write?" I have many ways to resolve it, but why am I doing it in the first place? I guess Christmas time brings in the apocalyptic fanatic in me, or something.