Save a Failed Idol’s Life

“Didn’t you say that Ise-hyung is not doing the center this time?”

As the five members gathered in the living room, Ye-jun threw the topic with a gleam in his eyes.

They were all surprised, since they had thought that the most eye-catching spot belonged to Cheon Ise.

“Then who are you thinking of as the center for this single?”

Since I was the overall planner, the eyes naturally turned to me.

To cut to the chase, I hadn’t decided yet.

Seon-woo’s condition was still vague, and I didn’t have a chance to talk frankly with Son Seongwon.

He had lost a lot of weight, but Seon-woo was still in the late 70s. 

Considering his height of over 180, it wasn’t too burdensome, but…

Ye-jun, who was about 4cm taller than Seon-woo, had a muscular body from boxing and weighed in the mid-70s. 

Seongwon, who was slightly bigger, was in the early 70s.

Kyunghwa, who was slightly smaller than Seon-woo, was in the late 60s. Seon-woo had to go down to the early 70s at least.

‘He did lose a lot compared to when he almost hit three digits…’

But if he became the center, he would inevitably catch the eyes of many people.

He had already been talked about for his body shape once during a live broadcast. If he appeared on TV with the editing that made him look fatter…

I didn’t want to think about Seon-woo getting hurt, or the aftermath.

I couldn’t rely on the skill buff all the time, since I didn’t know where the side effects would go.

Considering that, it was safer to put Seongwon, who was scheduled to appear on a competition program before the comeback, in the center.

‘He seems to think he has the center vibe too…’

Seon-woo looked like he had no thoughts, Ye-jun was half hopeful and half curious. Kyunghwa didn’t openly say he wanted to be the center, but he didn’t look displeased either.

‘This is totally that.’

An apology to the most beautiful goddess. No matter who I chose, I would be resented by the ones who weren’t chosen.

They wouldn’t be jealous or hate me for not giving them the center spot. But they would be disappointed deep down. I thought so and broke out in a cold sweat on my back.

It would be a disaster if I thought about Seongwon and Ye-jun’s relationship. Ye-jun was already eliminated from the center candidates, so he didn’t need to care about Seongwon.

The problem was when I gave Seongwon the center spot.

‘Ye-jun would hate it so much.’

I needed a justification to persuade Ye-jun if I wanted to give Seongwon the center spot.

It wouldn’t work to just say, let’s give him the center because he sings well.

‘What about me? I rap really well too.’

He would refute me in one word. I couldn’t open my mouth and just mumbled.

“Uh…”

“Don’t drag it out. You’re not that kind of character, hyung.”

If I were in the position of the CEO Lim Hyeonsung, I could have made the decision on my own.

I would have been confident to package whoever was the center into a sellable product.

But apart from that, my compassion for the big kids who didn’t grow up made me hesitate to make a decision.

‘I’m weak for the kids.’

I didn’t need to feel any sense of camaraderie, and I used them all rationally. Even if I had a firm will…

As soon as I saw their stubborn or fragile sides, I thought, oh, they’re still kids. And my firm will crumbled like a sandcastle in front of the waves.

They were all immature, because they had deviated from the normal course of social life due to their entertainment career.

No matter which side I chose, there would be someone who got hurt, and they all had their pros and cons.

‘Are you thinking of playing daddy, Lim Hyeon-sung, who hasn’t even married at your father’s age?’

I slapped my cheek lightly to clear my mind.

“I haven’t decided yet.”

“We have to divide our parts today. Just pick one quickly.”

Even Kyunghwa snapped impatiently. Of course, it was right considering the future schedule, but I felt cornered right now.

“Let’s divide the parts first. Anyway, the center is more important when we make the choreography, so why don’t we talk to the choreographer and decide?”

I dodged the question by referring to the content I had seen on the YouTube channel run by a famous choreography team, while I was looking for their portfolios.

It wasn’t a wrong answer, so there was no immediate rebuttal.

“The highlight high note should go to Seongwon. Ye-jun can take the main rap part in the chorus variation and join the chorus.”

The lyrics had a total of six parts in the ABABCB structure. Groups with many members would split the parts even within a line…

But we didn’t need to do that for the climax. We had five members now, when we used to have seven.

There were also some settings that were discarded as the members decreased, and it was ridiculous to think about it now.

[Every day, new and different boys come to you!]

That was the worldview where the members were assigned to each day of the week.

There was a saying that the older idols valued the worldview more, so I was a bit concerned.

‘Do we have to worry about our worldview setting for this comeback?’

When I asked Kyunghwa casually, he looked at me with the eyes of someone from the ancient Joseon era.

‘Weekends are gone, what can we do with them…’

That was right. The foreign member was Saturday, and the Korean member was Sunday, but they both left at the same time.

It was only a matter of ridicule to try to continue the setting with only the weekdays left.

‘It’s better to treat it as a setting that disappeared naturally.’

I nodded along with Kyunghwa’s cold conclusion. Anyway, the part distribution became simpler as we became five, I thought.

I turned my circuit of mental victory and returned to reality.

“Anyone has a part they want?”

Seongwon and Ye-jun, who had each taken the vocal and rap parts of the C part variation, had nothing more to say.

“I can go anywhere.”

This was sincere.

Seongwon had already taken the difficult part, and Cheon Ise was not a member with a strong vocal anyway.

“Then can I take the intro?”

Seon-woo asked cautiously, and Kyunghwa frowned.

“I wanted that part too.”

“Ah.”

Seon-woo couldn’t assert himself and shrank back. I understood Kyunghwa’s position of not giving up the part easily.

They all wanted the spot that caught attention, since this could be their last activity.

I knew their feelings, so I couldn’t easily raise anyone’s hand. I felt sorry for Kyunghwa, who was excluded from the center candidates early on.

I shouldn’t let my personal sympathy interfere with my business decisions. Get a grip, Lim Hyeon-sung.

After a brief silence, Kyunghwa was the first to raise his hand.

“Since you rarely want something, you can do it. But you have to promise to lose weight below 74 by the day we take the jacket photos.”

He must have wanted to do the intro part too. He was the oldest and the most responsible one, trying to take care of the youngest.

“Really? Can I?”

Seon-woo’s pretty face turned rosy in an instant.

“Yeah. But don’t think I’m just giving it to you. You don’t have much time left, so work hard to avoid yo-yoing.”

“Yes! I’ll really work hard!”

Seeing the youngest Seon-woo smile brightly, I felt warm in my heart.

It would be nice if things went smoothly and warmly like this. But that wouldn’t be easy.

I glanced at Kyunghwa’s expression. He was acting calm, but he didn’t look very happy.

‘Hopefully, they agreed on this, so it’s settled.’

We had divided the parts, and I sent the final audio file that Ye-jun had arranged to the company, and I felt relieved.

“Then the most pressing problem now is…”

The big obstacle that I had temporarily forgotten came to my mind again.

The radio appearance with Kang Yugeon.

“Ah… I honestly don’t know what he’s thinking, and I’m really uncomfortable.”

Kyunghwa was more wary than me, bristling his fur. It was understandable.

The terror from Floss’s fandom was just a minor incident to me, but…

‘For Kyunghwa, it must have been a nightmare that he experienced painfully.’

If he had come to apologize or explain, the emotional gap wouldn’t have been so deep.

But he just kept his mouth shut, acting like we did nothing wrong, subtly playing the victim. I had no choice but to grind my teeth.

“Well, he wouldn’t be playing tricks with malice now. We did get some help from him.”

Climax was like a stray stone, without any regular activities.

It was a relief that we could at least give the fans something to consume.

‘If we could secure the minimum fans who would consume our content, we could make our own content too.’

Right now, there was no guarantee of the minimum demand even if we filmed it, so the company wouldn’t invest in it.

I had to think about it later. Back to the radio appearance.

“But I still don’t trust him. Kang Yugeon, that bastard, he’s always stabbing people in the back, whether it’s entertainment or anywhere else.”

I didn’t believe him because I wanted to. I didn’t even believe him in the first place. But I had no choice but to refuse, so I did my best to face him.

“Well, we can’t say no, so we have to use him as much as we can.”

“Who, Kang Yugeon?”

I didn’t answer.

***

After dividing the parts, I was busy preparing for the comeback, and the day of the radio appearance came.

It was only an hour-long appearance, but it was a mess from the morning.

The radio was broadcast at 3 p.m., but I had to prepare from 10 a.m., and I was exhausted.

“His mouth is so energetic from the morning.”

Kyunghwa sighed as he looked somewhere.

At the end of Kyunghwa’s gaze, Ye-jun was chatting with the staff. He was so easygoing. He didn’t stop talking even while getting his makeup done.

Anyone would think he was interested in the female staff. It was a scene that could be misunderstood.

But no one misunderstood.

The stylist who came earlier was a man, and he had a harder time than the makeup staff.

I made a white noise to calm Kyunghwa down.

“I think that’s his… his own talent.”

If you’re an idol, you should be able to talk to strangers all day long.

Not me, though.

“Maybe he and Kang Yugeon could talk for 30 minutes by themselves.”

Kyunghwa, who was the host in Climax, was so scared of Kang Yugeon.

That might be a safer choice. Then Kyunghwa said something unexpected.

“Isn’t Kang Yugeon interested in you, Ise?”

“Huh?”

I was taken aback. 

I looked at Kyunghwa with a puzzled expression.

“What do you mean by that?”

Why would Kang Yugeon be interested in me? That was a ridiculous thing to say.

“You know. The messages he sent when you got attention for the salad. I thought he was doing that because he wanted to eat the food you made.”

Just for the food? I narrowed my eyes for a moment.

Of course, I would do that and more.

But I was someone who loved eating and made a business out of it and hit the jackpot!

Don’t most people not do that? I casually raised a question mark, and the makeup staff called me.

If it was real makeup, not just skin correction, why did I have to do it?

I wasn’t the type who suited it anyway. I walked slowly like a cat with its fur raised.

‘Ah… I have to get used to this as an idol.’

I put aside the question about Kang Yugeon, and it was time to dress up nicely as an idol.