Reincarnated as a Phoenix

“For the love of… *sigh*. Petra! It’s happened again!”

“*Facepalm*. Is Aesa here as well?”

…

Life has a way of being cruel as once again, we’re forced back into the void. But, unlike with our usual adventures, no perversion is the cause of it this time around.

Ahead of us is a long table with who else but those annoying creators that seem to want to steal the show. Unlike the last time, there’s eight of them and all have oddly shaped forms. Half are orb shaped; the other half couldn’t be more different if they tried.

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 It was bad enough Asmodeus doing it when he was still alive… great. Now I’m feeling even worse bringing up the dead again.

“Oi you morons, stop freaking sending us here! If you need anything, relay it through Aesa”

…

Instead of getting a response, the energy in here feels like a parent ignoring a misbehaving child. We’ve not even started yet and I’m already getting pissy. Not going to say a single thing till one of them get started now.

(Orb of Water) <We, the primordial beings officially greet the last demon and the newest Goddess of wisdom. All of us are in attendance so if any oppose, now is the time to do so>

Maybe being mistaken, the atmosphere inside this place now feels more professional than usual. I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing.

“You just said all the primordial beings? Which of you are supposed to be Nyx and Chaos then?”

“*Gasps!*”

Actually hearing some of these idiots gasp from my cheeky remark, my assumption of this is true. Nyx may not have mentioned there’s any bad blood between the beings, but it’s clear there must be some.

(Virus Spore) <It appears you’ve been less observant than we expected. To bring those two up… there’s still work to be done>

(Tentacles) <We are the ones that question and observe, not you!>

(Jellyfish) <We advise you never to use those two names in our company again>

(Orb of Fire) <Unfortunately, I cannot defend you on this>

(Orb of Light) <The disrespect. There’s no logic in discussing topics with creatures that don’t understand simple courtesy>

(Orb of Water) <Advise you all relax and let emotion fade. She is testing us just as we test everyone else>

(Orb of Transparency) <Agreed with my wavey brethren. It was only a question with the intent being to cause a reaction>

(Demon) <Ha! My fellow beings are extremely sensitive when it comes to… Nyx. She’s of no use to us now so best just forget about her and Chaos>

‘The fact most of these dislike Nyx makes me like her even more. At least she’s willing to put on a humanly face’

For the sake of myself, Petra and all the imaginary voices inside my head, the faster we get out of this place, the better. Just tell me what ability to upgrade already and let’s be done with it.

“Clock’s a ticking and you lot have us at a bad time. Get to it already or I’m teleporting both of us out of here”

(Demon) <Ha! I admire your nativity orange phoenix, as if we’d allow you to escape that easily. No, listen to our terms and conditions, then you’ll be set free…>

‘Fuck! Terms and conditions my arse, didn’t realize these lot are like a capitalist company’

Pausing for dramatic effect, it doesn’t take a genius to figure out who Asmodeus gets his personality off. Even in death, he still finds a way of continuing that stupid grin. The zeno-something demon’s face basically smiles the same after all… even if it has a mouth inside another mouth.

(Demon) <In full view of all those beside me, I offer a deal which woul->

“No”

<Ha! Haven’t even finished yet sister, you and destination number five really are alike. For now, you should silent until I’m finished>

“No means no, demon. Our minds aren’t going to cha-, mhmmm!”

I’ve actually been physically muted! Like, my mouth no longer exists! Does he think treating me like this is going to change my mind!? I’m so done with anything demon related now.

On the bright side, at least I’ve still got the rest of my face. I’ve seen that shit in horror movies and that shit is traumatizing. Here’s hoping I do look a little creepy though… not why I think that would be cool.

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Now crossing my arms and pouting as best someone without a mouth can do, I’ll just let him finish. Not like I have much of a choice anymore… wonder if my arms and legs will be removed if I attack them. Yeah… I’ll keep myself calm and composed for now.

I can already see Petra wanting to strike them down for shutting me up, but clearly has more control than I… I think? Regardless, I’ll hold her hand and see if that will calm her down.

(Demon) <Where was I… ah yes! If it weren’t for the corrupted lizards made a long time ago, your world would be perfect for our goals. Alas, we’ve spotted a diamond in the rough as wish to see sparkle>

‘Again with this dragon creation thing, swear even Zeus made a small comment about it a while ago. Asmodeus already told us they basically evolved from those gigantic beasts down south’

(Demon) <What I offer to both of you, is a power that could brighten your wildest dreams. The power those Gods wield can be all yours with just a simple trick>

Appearing from the darkness, an obsidian looking sword takes attention of the room that even makes some of the primordial Gods shake their heads… or orbs. I’m not sure all of them agree with this and with the dark energy it’s producing, I can understand why. It’s sinister.

(Demon) <It’s as simple as prodding a rotting corpse. When the day comes, pierce a part of Zeus’s lingering soul with this. Dead or alive, it matters not. The power you will both obtain from this is beyond your realm of imagination>

‘Aesa… you have any thoughts on this?’

[<…!>]

<Ha! She can’t be trusted to guide you on this decision. Whether you do this or not, Aesa cannot be allowed to influence your mind>

Well shit. That fact he doesn’t want Aesa to intervene means trusting this guy on this is a bad call, right? The fact he can shut us off as easily as removing my mouth… do we actually have the ability of refusing this?

“You can’t expect me and Ikarus to blindly follow along when this is the way you plan on doing things. Maybe start with some more context if we’re to do what you want?”

The wife’s words of wisdom actually makes the demon drop his creepy smile and return to getting more serious. He doesn’t actually answer her question though.

(Tentacles) <This is a test to determine your true ambitions, whether they reach a peak or grow infinitely>

(Jellyfish) <Any advice given matters little when this decision is yours to make>

(Orb of Light) <Whether you go through it or not matters little to us>

(Orb of Fire) <The words ***** speak are untrue. It does matter to some of us. My wishes are for you decline the offer>

(Demon) <Ha! You always felt overprotective with things in relation to fire. You tried the same thing with me, fire bringer>

(Virus Spore) <Whatever happens, we’ll be here to observe the results. We’ll be disappointed if you fall in the inevitable battle>

(Orb of Water) “Some of us will, we won’t care either way. The tides of fate flow in every direction”

(Orb of Transparency) “We’ll watch keenly if you wish to take on the burden of the world”

Listening to all of these ramble on, I think what they’re getting at is possessing Zeus’s power. That would give us the world? It’s… slightly tempting but not all that much.

“*Cough cough*, finally. Just to be sure, you’re basically offering us the world, correct?”

Thankfully, the demon finally allows me to speak. Why do I feel the need to cough? I dunno…

(Demon) <Ha! Something like that, land comes with the game. The question is, just how far are you two willing to go? How much power do you wish to possess in those palms of yours?>

…

Unable to give him an answer, me and Petra look at each other with reservation and know this isn’t a great idea.

“Can we go already?”

<Ha, of course. But first, the sword goes with you. You can always choose the correct decision later on…>

__________

[<Unfortunately Ikarus, that sword has been forced into storage and is now considered a quest item>]

‘Sigh, undroppable quest items. Bet it has weight to it as well’

[<Affirmative Ikarus. The demonic creator really is a pain in the arse>]

Back to the present at a little dessert café we’ve visited a few times before, the day we decide to get out of bed gets ruined because that’s just how life is sometimes. Ah, happy face Ikarus. Enough with the moaning and depressive stuff, life is meant for living!

“Just to confirm Petra, we are turning them down, right?”

“Heh, of course Ikarus, let’s just hope we have the choice. If it’s a matter of dying or using that blade, we’ll have to do what’s necessary”

‘Oh great, that fills me with confidence. I love her and all but sometimes ignorance is bliss’

“Hey uh, are you two okay? You went quiet for quite a while. Now, you’re talking about a blade?”

“Erk! Are you two even listening to us!? I just told you the story of the cow chasing goblin’s and them committing sudoku, and you weren’t listening at all!?”

‘Okay… now I’m happy we got out of hearing that story’

Oh right. I forgot to mention we’re not the only people at the café. Our reduced party of six are sitting with or near us. We’ve also got a visitor as well, she arrived at out settlement today and it seemed rude to not say hello considering what happened. She basically appeared from the shadows and no one has any idea why though…

“Just headspace things Ariza, don’t worry about it. Yo Nyx, since you’re technically a primordial being and all… is there any way we can stop those idiots from contacting us?”

“Sorry Ikarus, it’s best for me not to get involved just yet. I can weaken the connection when it appears next if you want. I’m unable to stop it outright though”

There is something strange that I’m only now picking up on. Does Nyx like Petra or something? Her eyes have been glued to her ever since we sat down and started engorging in this cake. Everyone should like my wife but it is a little weird. We all know the oracle is Petra’s mother so it isn’t something like that… unless there’s some familiar connection? I’m still yet to know the oracle’s name, wouldn’t surprise me if there’s a connection somewhere. Ah, the absolute clusterfuck that is Greek mythology…

(Petra) “Please do that Nyx”

Returning back to my slice of heaven, or carrot cake, my attention twists even more from the lovey dovey shit the other side of the table. Nat x Lotte are currently doing something publicly I never would’ve imagined, priestess is actually feeding the knight cake! Our succubus-sama famous for liking cake knows how to share it!? I guess making her husband blush is worth the sacrifice… wait. The public display of affection is more important!

“Erm… Petra?”

“Heh, open up Ikarus. Can tell your heart is filled with jealously”

“I hate you at times… num”

Not needing to even say a thing but doing it anyway, Petra senses my stupidity and I find a fork with her cheesecake on it. I really want to sulk and say no… eh. Who am I kidding? Down the hatch…

“Queens… I have some important news!”

An annoying intruder bursts into the café, grabbing everyone’s attention and heading straight for our table. Another thing I’ve just realized is that our busty elven maid has jiggle physics turned up to an unrealistic level.

“This arrived this morning and you must see it immediately!”

Eve runs to our table and places the unsealed invitation on it. On the front of written says ‘to the two Queen of Lesbos’ in extremely childish handwriting. This isn’t good.

“Eve, who the hell delivered this!? Quickly now, we may have a huge problem!”

Getting in as quick as I can, the only person I know of with such childish writing is the world-famous Zeus. If he’s here personally to deliver a note, then he may already be wreaking havoc.

“Penelope did, Queen Ikarus. Apparently a bird carried it over so it’s fine, we’re not under attack”

‘Phew, at least that explains why the note isn’t sealed. Miss Gender Bender couldn’t help herself… guess I’ll sit back down then’

(NPC 1) “Wait, we’re under attack again?”

(NPC 2) “Where are the Gods hiding this time? Let’s fucking go!”

(NPC 3) “It’s time to get our swords again! Let’s defend the islands!”

In a matter of seconds, Eve’s slip of the tongue sends the entire café into a frenzy. I’ve got to hide under my arms and bang my head against the table, the cultists have infected every single corner of our town.

“No! We’re NOT under attack, calm down everyone! Jeez… don’t eavesdrop using those non-pointy ears y’all have”

(NPC 1) “Aww, shucks. I wanted to spill some more godly blood…”

Moving on, both me and Petra open up the note and I’ll be honest… I can’t read this. Having an automatic translator is pointless when the freaking language doesn’t need to be translated. It’s like writing cursive while drunk, but also using your weak hand!

Thankfully, the wife can sense I’m not getting anything from this, so she’ll give me what’s needed. She’s not finding this easy as well and has to stare at it.

“It’s… an invitation Ikarus. Summarized… something about regrets, wanting to make amends… no. Make amends to the Gods he’s offended, we’re apparently excluded…”

‘Figures. As if he could ever give up that hatred of us’

“…Let’s see… mention of us destroying his world… a lot of bahs. Ah, he’s given up on the idea of destroying everything. Know, he just wants an ending of sorts. It ends with him mentioning his palace and one final battle. No games, no tricks, just a fight to the death”

This… actually surprises me. He’s finally willing to give up on the idea of destroying everything to just settle things using fisticuffs? This has to be a trap… not like we can turn it down though. This is our only lead.

“He’s not expecting a one-on-one battle, is he?”

“It says… bring that darkened witch by your side if you must require assistance from you lover. Heh, think I’m now a witch, Ikarus”

…

“It actually says that? Where!?”

“Heh, might not want to look Ikarus. There’s a lot of cursing in this”

Quickly scanning the note, I find the area Petra doesn’t want me to see and know exactly what’s been put down, insults seem easier to spot. Vile, disgusting, pitiful, witch, boring… how dare he call Petra those things!

I’ve also noticed the colourful, maybe even racist language he’s used for me. I’m not paying an inch of attention to that though.

“That fucking bastard! First, he summons that thing that kills father, then he calls you boring? I want him to suffer to his last breath”

Already knowing I’m going down the Zeki path, I’m long past the days of caring. This isn’t one of those stages of grief thing where the stage I’m in is anger… you have no idea what I want to do him. Remember that sadistic princess Petra lost her temper to? The one who ended up like a red painting… that’s just the tip of the iceberg.

“Ikarus…”

Feeling the wife’s hand lightly squeeze against my hand and an obvious fake smile to try and lighten my mood, unfortunately nothing like that is going to help me. I already know she’s angry deep down from seeing the note insult me like this, just always puts on a brave face for the both of us.

“Even now, he still doesn’t consider the possibility of peace? That’s… unsurprising”

Nyx speaks to herself when scanning through the note, not at all surprised from the development.

(Petra) “Huh… he does say he’d be willing to negotiate a surrender if we beg and grovel at his feet. It also mentions a period of servitude… or slavery. That part is unclear”

(Nyx) “That’s unfortunate. Once one reaches the pinnacle of what’s possible, this is unfortunately quite common. Delusion”

So, Zeus may now be willing to leave the world alone but in order to achieve peace, we must serve him? Yeah… this world isn’t big enough for the both of us.

“At least there’s no reservations… do we know where he is at least?”

“It says something about an obvious mountain close to a river and the desert. Think that can only be one place Ikarus”

An obvious mountain, right at the edge of the Sierran continent. I know exactly where he’s referring to… so does Zeki as well.

“Erk! That fucking dickhead has stolen my crib! That took years to get all that shit in there and his stupid ass is now using it!”

“Uh, ahem Zeki”

“Oh, bite me brother. I don’t care if it was yours and sister’s first. He’s going to fry for stealing our home… or first home. Erk, let’s take back our home…”