LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 19
Episode 19
“…Um, Team Leader Cheon. I think you need to get in the car right now for the next schedule.”
Seo Soo-yeon, who always managed Cheon Jong-hoon’s schedule, cautiously spoke to him.
However, he didn’t respond to her words.
He just stood there, looking dazed as if caught in deep thought.
Even after Taeyang and Gyeoul left, Cheon Jong-hoon couldn’t bring himself to move from the lobby.
As Seo Soo-yeon pointed out, if he thought about the next schedule, he should have moved right away, but he couldn’t.
The last words of Seon Taeyang kept swirling in his mind.
‘I hope Gyeoul is smiling in that light.’
He understood the context of those words through knowledge and experience.
It’s a tough industry to survive in without a longing for stardom or dreams, and Cheon Jong-hoon had had those feelings before when he first entered this field.
Still, he drastically underestimated it.
A pure wish for his artist to be happy.
That was a childish thought Cheon Jong-hoon had already graduated from a decade ago.
“Do you want the artist to smile?”
“…Huh?”
Seo Soo-yeon was startled and replied, thinking that Cheon Jong-hoon was talking to her.
But that seemed to be her misunderstanding.
His words weren’t directed at her.
“That’s a childish thought only amateurs who can’t let go of their fanheart would have. We’re merchants creating idols, taking the fans’ money as customers.”
Cheon Jong-hoon continued to speak, not looking at Seo Soo-yeon but rather staring blankly at the lobby’s main door where Gyeoul and Taeyang had exited.
“The first thing we need to think about is creating high-quality products that satisfy our customers. The second and third are the same—creating products that are sellable and complete. That’s everything.”
In Cheon Jong-hoon’s view, that was professional; that was what it meant to be an expert.
“An artist’s smile doesn’t even make it to the tenth priority. It’s utterly insignificant!”
That was the definition of the producer that Cheon Jong-hoon established after cutting and grinding himself on the path to success.
He didn’t doubt this.
But why was he justifying himself?
He couldn’t understand the reason.
Suddenly, he recalled the expression on Seon Taeyang’s face when he had been trying to hold him back by listing conditions.
It looked almost pitying…
“Seo Soo-yeon!”
“Yes… um, yes!”
“From now on, contact all the agencies connected to SS. Actually, regardless of whether they’re connected or not, contact them all!”
Seo Soo-yeon was frightened by Cheon Jong-hoon’s unprecedented fury but also had to ask one thing regarding the order.
“…What do I say when I contact them?”
Cheon Jong-hoon spoke like a beast unable to contain its rage.
“…Agencies that take in Seon Taeyang and Han Gyeoul should be prepared to be hostile with SS.”
Cheon Jong-hoon knew this would leave a huge stain on his career.
He also knew he would definitely regret this later.
To carry out this one directive, SS’s prestige would be diminished.
Reporters smelling the drama would dig through every hole, and within SS, Cheon Jong-hoon’s standing would significantly drop. The succession plan might also wobble.
It might lower. The successor situation might also get shaky.
Still, I couldn’t leave Taeyang and Gyeoul alone. If they succeed in front of everyone, it feels like something that Cheon Jong-hoon built up over his entire life would crumble.
Surely those two geniuses will definitely soar above Cheon Jong-hoon someday.
*
“Gyeoul.”
“Yes?”
“We’re outside now. We won’t run into any SS staff or Alcest kids.”
“…Yes.”
“So, can you let go of my hand now?”
“….”
Gyeoul tightened her grip as if she didn’t want to let go.
Noona looked at the two of us with a bizarre expression.
“It seems like you two have something to talk about. I’ll head inside first.”
“No, Noona, we don’t really have anything to share.”
Noona then raised her middle finger at me and walked towards where the car was parked.
… I’m holding the car keys, though.
Gyeoul bent over and bowed until Noona’s back disappeared from sight.
Of course, my hand was still held tight.
This was awkward.
“Gyeoul, can I ask that question I was going to earlier?”
I ran to the lobby, recalling what Gyeoul said.
‘…I was embarrassed to show that side to Teacher Taeyang.’
“What did you mean by saying you were embarrassed?”
Even though our bond had formed in such a short time, Gyeoul and I had shown each other many embarrassing sides.
I wondered if there was anything to be embarrassed about now.
“We already experienced issues regarding Yeji between us, so there wasn’t really anything to hide, right?”
Things had worked out, but if Gyeoul had actively communicated and shared her thoughts with me, things could’ve been resolved easier.
Since I foresaw the future, I acted boldly; otherwise, I wouldn’t have been able to move like this.
In many ways, staying in touch felt right.
Although I lost my smartphone to SS and it was hard to find a way to contact, I could find a way somehow.
Feeling embarrassed was ultimately Gyeoul’s desire to avoid communication.
That left me puzzled.
Weren’t we pretty in sync?
“…Teacher Taeyang.”
“Yes, speak comfortably.”
Gyeoul wore a cold and dry expression, neither crying nor smiling bashfully.
It was as if she wore the same expression she had when hanging from the railings of that bridge for the first time.
“I’m actually more frustrating, dull, and useless than you think, Teacher Taeyang.”
I wanted to refute her self-deprecation but held it back.
She still had more to say.
“When I first met you, I said I lost my wallet, right?”
“Yeah.”
“That was a lie.”
“Then what were you doing?”
“I was thinking if anyone would come find me if I fell here.”
Hearing that truth made my breath hitch.
“…Why did you think that?”
“It wasn’t a lie that I lost money. It’s just that it wasn’t on that bridge. I think I lost it at the train station where I last talked to Yeji. Other than there, I had no place to take out my wallet.”
The culprit was so obvious.
“Yeji, who came to see me off, said she would check her wallet before getting on the train. I, being the utter fool, handed my wallet over to her without any rebuttal. And didn’t even check it. I thought that was trust.”
“….”
“I took out my wallet when I was trying to take a taxi after arriving in Seoul. All the cash and cards were completely gone.”
“That fucking bitch.”
I made a vow. Regardless of Gyeoul’s grandfather sending Yeji away with the law, I had to get back at her too.
Seeing me shaking with anger at Yeji, Gyeoul smiled weakly before continuing.
“You might think it’s strange that I almost went over the ledge for such a trivial matter. But for me, Yeji was really important.”
Gyeoul extended the hand that wasn’t holding me and began counting one by one.
“My grandfather doesn’t like me. The kids in class don’t like me. My mom and dad don’t like me. The kids at the dance academy don’t like me either.”
There was only one finger left.
“Yeji was the only one who said she liked me.”
A tremor passed from Gyeoul’s hand.
“I knew Yeji didn’t like me purely. She only smiled when I bought her something and didn’t like it when I tried to act like I knew her… Still, even that twisted relationship was so precious to me.”
I lent a bit of strength to her trembling hand.
“Because it was my only relationship. It was the only thing I had.”
Hoping she’d know that I existed.
“So I went up on the ledge. I thought I had nothing left… That’s when Teacher Taeyang appeared.”
That was our first meeting.
“The look in Teacher Taeyang’s eyes sparkled like jewels. It was the first time I’d ever received such a gaze since I was born.”
It really was like discovering a jewel.
To me, who was going crazy over the quest, it looked like an opportunity lying on the ground.
“I didn’t want to look like a stupid kid attempting suicide in front of such a teacher. So I lied and put on a show.”
It was quite embarrassing to suddenly kneel down and beg.
“He saw me in such a light, showered me with compliments, and had high expectations. When in reality, I was just a foolish, dull, and depressed failure.”
She seemed to wound herself with her words, as if that was how it had to be.
“Yet, I wanted to remain a talented kid in Teacher Taeyang’s eyes. That’s why.”
“You are talented, Gyeoul. You’re more than just a genius.”
Gyeoul shook her head.
“I couldn’t even adapt or get along with the kids, and I couldn’t even do a proper routine, getting bullied by Yoon Jeong. That’s not the genius that Teacher Taeyang talked about… Showing and admitting that side of me to Teacher Taeyang was really embarrassing.”
Gyeoul averted her gaze as if she couldn’t bear to look at me.
“I could never become such a genius. So there’s no reason for Teacher Taeyang to invest time in me. It’d be better to find a better kid.”
“I can’t become such a genius. So, Teacher Taeyang has no reason to invest time in me. It would be better to find a better kid.”
Gyeoul is saying that she hopes I look for someone else.
But to me, it seemed like she wanted something completely different.
Rather, she seemed to want assurance that I wouldn’t leave her.
After all, her hand still gripped mine tightly as if she didn’t want to let go.
“Don’t worry, Gyeoul. I have no intention of letting you go.”
“You said a month ago that you’d bet your entire life on me becoming the top idol, right?”
Gyeoul silently nodded her head.
“I won’t let it end with just words. I’ll stake my entire future on you.”
I knelt down to match Gyeoul’s eye level and said,
“I’ll do everything with you from now on. No matter which agency you go to, I’ll follow you. And I’ll make sure you reach the top. Forever and ever.”
I want to suck the life out of that genius you are! Will you allow me to stick to you like a leech?
At my words, a faint smile appeared on Gyeoul’s face.
But soon, it was washed away by an even greater sadness.
“I’m really happy. It’s such a wonderful thing to hear. But please don’t say that.”
“Why not?”
As I wiped away Gyeoul’s newly flowing tears with one hand, I wondered why more tears seemed to come out the more I wiped.
Even in the waterfall of tears, Gyeoul spoke each word clearly.
“I hope to succeed, but if I fail, I won’t have any way to repay Teacher Taeyang’s time and effort. Even if I gave you everything I have, I couldn’t make it up to you.”
“If I can’t succeed with you, that’s my fault, so why would you need to repay me? Rather, I should repay you.”
If I fail with a kid whose main abilities are all A’s, I might as well die.
“Even so, if I fail, it would all be over! This time, this caring touch—all of it!”
As emotions poured out in words unspoken, Gyeoul’s hands trembled coldly, and her eyes were filled with a chill.
Hoping that the coldness would melt even a little, I faced her shaking eyes and smiled.
“If being an idol fails, we can do something else.”
“What would that be?”
“Well… how about internet broadcasting? You’re pretty, after all. Once you turn on the cam, the views are guaranteed! I can handle the editing.”
“And if that fails?”
“Then let’s open up a pub. I’ll cook and you can serve. We can set up a small stage in the corner, and sometimes when you’re serving, you can sing. People will flock like clouds!”
“And if that fails, too?”
I started tossing out ideas—from music academies to seniors’ towns, even maid cafés.
By the middle, I was just joking to make her laugh, but instead, Gyeoul’s tears started flowing even more.
…Is a maid café that sad?
Gyeoul even took hold of my left hand that was wiping her tears.
Holding both of my hands like that, she gazed into my eyes and said,
“Teacher Taeyang.”
“Yeah?”
“Let’s definitely stay together for a long time.”
“Okay.”
Han Gyeoul smiled.
Not living up to her name, just like spring.