Prophecy Approved Companion

Book One Chapter Thirty Five: Wood Elf Companion Side Quest Hook



The Chosen One seemed strangely disinclined to talk after that cryptic remark. Instead, he led them into the Forbidden Forest village, where folks had settled back into their routines. In fact, they seemed to be the exact same routines as when Qube and the others had been there last. Even the Wood Elves in charge of rebuilding several of the houses seemed to have made no progress whatsoever — they just kept running loops around the village holding planks of lumber and complaining about how hard they were working!

It seemed even Wood Elves had lazy people who spent more energy looking busy than they would actually working, Qube thought with a sniff.

The ruler of the Forbidden Forest was also right where they’d left him, sitting on his frankly uncomfortable-looking throne of twisted thorns, made of similar-looking wood to the twisted thorn crown he was wearing. It probably had some deep metaphorical connection to the Forbidden Forest (when were they going to rename the place, anyway?) but Qube was rather more interested in the way he and his bodyguard were looking at Sexy Screamy Spider Lady as the Chosen One approached. Normally everyone turned to look at the Chosen One as soon as he entered a room — sometimes even staring unerringly at where he had wandered off to when he’d left the room. But the ruler and the bodyguard were looking between the Chosen One and Sexy Screamy Spider Lady with about as close as one can get to stern disapproval when faced with the person in charge of saving the world and his trusty hideous monster of a companion.

“So, you’ve returned,” the ruler said to both the Chosen One and Sexy Screamy Spider Lady. Sexy Screamy Spider Lady gave a very complicated curstey, parts of her equipment and clothing melding with her flesh as she moved, only to pop back out again once she was upright. As was normal. In fact, Qube wondered for the first time, was Sexy Screamy Spider Lady somehow riddled with pockets? That would explain several things. Like where her original outfit had gone when she’d put on her Fireproof clothing, for example.

“Yes, Father,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady said, tossing her head back defiantly.

Qube blinked. The ruler of the Wood Elves was Sexy Screamy Spider Lady’s father? He must have married a giant spider — that would explain the children’s faces all over the Hunter. She must have gotten them from her father’s side.

“You should speak to Ruler Wefton with more respect,” the female bodyguard next to the ruler scolded.

“Yes, Mother,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady replied sulkily.

Qube nearly bit her own tongue in surprise. Wait — both of Sexy Screamy Spider Lady’s parents were Wood Elves? And the rulers of the Forbidden Forest, as well! Surely that made her some kind of Wood Elf royalty, right? Separate from the Dryad Queen, sure, but still royalty!

Had they been traveling with an incognito royal this entire time?!

“Princess Sexy Screamy Spider Lady!” Qube gasped. “I’m so sorry I was so informal with you! I had no idea!”

“I’m not a Princess,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady said angrily.

Qube frowned. Just because Sexy Screamy Spider Lady had clearly been adopted was no reason for her not to inherit the throne! She hadn’t thought Wood Elves to be so narrow-minded. She opened her mouth to say such when Sexy Screamy Spider Lady’s Father spoke up.

“We do not believe in Princes and Princesses,” he said sternly. Qube nearly snorted in disbelief, then remembered that the ruler wouldn’t have been able to see her anyway. “Head Guard Alash and I rule because we are fit to rule. Our daughter must prove her worth to take the Thorny Crown and be judged fit to succeed us. While her lifetime of personal tutelage by the current rulers may indeed have helped prepare her for this trial, the Thorny Crown will not allow itself to be taken by just any—”

The Chosen One stepped up next to the thorny throne and tried taking the crown off of the (apparently pseudo) king’s head. Ruler Wefton, with what Qube thought was a surprising amount of sangfroid, ignored the Chosen One.

“Character side quest?” the Chosen One asked the ruler hopefully, still trying to abstract his sign of authority.

“The time has not yet come for us to recall you,” Ruler Wefton told Sexy Screamy Spider Lady. “But you have duties that you have been neglecting.”

“Okay, no character side quest yet,” the Chosen One sighed.

“Father, the needs of the world are greater than the wants of this backwater,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady sniffed, her nostril slits flaring.

“So this is just more lore then. I don’t have time for this,” the Chosen One said, sighing in disgust and giving up on removing the Thorny Crown. He glanced at Qube. “We need to do a bit more testing — I mean, exploring, on our way back to … Cobbletown, was it?”

The Chosen One was clearly still not feeling a hundred percent, Qube thought. How could he forget the name of the only actual city they had ever been to? She had so much research to do, and maybe even a chance to duck back home to the village and see how everyone was doing.

“Come on, then,” the Chosen One said, casually leaving while the Wood Elf ruler was mid-speech about the importance of having the crown able to be claimed by any in stopping nepotism and social rot.

The Chosen One left the misty forest, but, rather than starting down the path that led directly to Cobbletown, he instead set off across the fields in the totally wrong direction.

Qube felt the instinct to remind the Chosen One of the actual direction they were supposed to be heading in, but hesitated, still somewhat shy after the “fast travel” incident. In fact, as everyone fell silent, she wasn’t sure if everyone had zoned out again. But the Chosen One turned around and smiled at her.

“Come on,” he said, slowing down so she could catch up.

“Um, Chosen One? What was it that caused you to become so focused on running? Not that there’s anything wrong with being so focused! It’s just, well, if we were to get attacked or some such, it would be a bit, not that I’m saying that you wouldn’t be able to withstand any attack, especially since we’ve been working on our teamwork, it’s just—”

“Oh, that’s ... “ the Chosen One interrupted her babbling, “when I’m going back to a place I’ve been before. I … meditate? So it feels faster? While I travel? Yeah. So I call it fast travel,” the Chosen One nodded to himself. “Yup, that makes sense.”

Qube had never seen the Chosen One do this before. But he was right. It did make sense.

After that, they ran in comfortable silence, save for the occasional back and forth between Sewer Bard and Sexy Screamy Spider Lady, with a few caustic comments tossed in by Definitely Bad Guy. But even their banter seemed calmer, somehow. Softer.

Even when they ran into a few monsters on the way, their teamwork seemed smoother. They all flowed into position, each of them knowing how the others would attack. Even the bags of coins inside said creatures they ran across seemed bigger, somehow.

They had all completed a full Temple together! They had done it! Qube could practically feel the strength of the bond between them. They were a real adventuring party, like in those very famous sagas Sewer Bard kept mentioning that neither she nor the Chosen One had ever heard of. Maybe because no bards had ever come to the village.

She wondered how the rebuilding of the village was going. Hopefully no one was being like those lazy workers at the Forbidden Forest!

The sun was at its zenith when they abruptly crested a hill and saw the most curious village Qube had ever seen. Well. Top three for sure. Especially as she’d only ever seen three.

But that was besides the point! This village was still strange! Everything in it seemed to be made of either metal or rock, with high walls that the tall, thin buildings peeped over. Several of the roofs were metal and rock welded together in a very top-heavy looking fashion, and there were cogs simply everywhere.

Qube couldn’t wait to go and see what the people there were like!

The Chosen One stopped abruptly, causing everyone else to immediately halt mid run. Such coordination warmed Qube’s heart.

“Okay,” the Chosen One said, “we’ll camp here.” Qube looked at first him then the village — they were so close! Surely he would want to stay at an inn? Did he think there wouldn’t be one? Wasn’t it worth checking first? Before she could start speaking, however, the Chosen One pulled a folded up piece of canvas out of his backpack and threw it to the ground. It then instantly sprang up into a fully made tent with a campfire merrily burning before it.

Qube had never seen an insta-camp in action before! She vaguely remembered taking a whole armful of canvas from Mr Igma’s shop, back in Cobbletown. What kind of magic was it using that would create instant fire, too?

“Chosen One—“ she turned to the Hero, only to find him looking at her, his face oddly blank.

“[Sleep],” he ordered, and Qube instantly tumbled onto one of the bed rolls and fell asleep.

It was fully dark by the time she awoke. The rest of the party had awoken at the exact same time, the Chosen One included. But, rather than packing up, he turned to the other three party members and began pointing at them one by one.

“You. [Sleep]. You. [Sleep]. You. [Sleep].” And. one by one. Sexy Screamy Spider Lady, Sewer Bard and Definitely Bad Guy lay back on top of their bedrolls and closed their eyes.

The Chosen One rolled his shoulders as Definitely Bad Guy instantly joined the others in sleep.

“Looks like I have to target them individually if I don’t want the entire party to go to sleep.” He glanced at Qube, then quickly looked away. “I’ll have to mention that. It’s kinda annoying.”

Qube, not understanding, gave an Understanding Smile.

The Chosen One went and sat by the still merrily burning campfire, and poked it with a stick that seemed to have been placed next to it for exactly that purpose.

“Not that you would understand what I’m talking about,” he muttered. “Or maybe you do? I don’t even know anymore.” He ran his hand through his hair. “I guess… I didn’t want to know. It’s not supposed to be my job to deal with this kind of problem. I just — I just wanted to help a mate out. See what I could break. Try out some new tech, y’know?”

He threw his stick into the campfire and moodily watched it burn. Qube hesitated. She’d never seen the Chosen One like this. She didn’t understand what was wrong, or how she could fix it. Her mind whirled with possibilities, theories, ways she could maybe help him. But then she shut that part down.

He was hurt. In some way she couldn’t define. So she would do what she had always done: She would be by his side.

She slowly walked up to his left side and carefully sat down next to him, tucking her feet underneath herself and primly rearranging her robes.

Timidly, she reached out and took his left hand.

“Don’t worry, Chosen One,” she said quietly, “I’m here.”

The Chosen One looked at their clasped hands, twisting them as he held them up to the firelight.

“It’s so warm,” he said, with wonder and a hint of bitterness in his voice. “It’s almost enough to make you forget…” He dropped her hand.

“Well,” he said, turning and facing her fully. “I suppose it’s time you and I had a talk.”


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