Pretending To Be Gilead's Prince and Master Wizard

(Just to be clear first before reading the newest update, ALIENIST is the term used in the late 1800s to call a 'psychiatrist.' :D)

***

With a shocked expression all over my face, I touched my cheeks with my right palm. There, I felt my face start to get wet from the tears that keep on rolling down into it. I can't believe that I just literally cried in front of a stranger out of the blue!

"Oh my gosh!" Danny, my co-worker, suddenly yelps in surprise with both of his hands clapped together in his mouth. "It is truly a pleasure to see you, Lady Margaret! I'm your biggest fan!"

That caught my attention. Lady Margaret… The name itself gives a ring inside my head. If I am not mistaken,  that was the name mentioned in school earlier this morning.

So if this woman in the fancy dress is Lady Margaret, then this guy in front of me must be…

Not minding my co-worker, Lady Margaret walks from the rows of antique furniture towards us.

"Is something wrong, sweetie?" she asks, clasping one hand on top of his shoulder as her eyes slide from him to me and back to him.

So, it is true. This guy in front of me is none other than Lady Margaret's rumored boyfriend, Captain Alex Crimson.

This is bad, really bad. I must think of an excuse for my sudden insolence.

"I… I just can't believe that I have seen you with my own eyes!" I fake squealed, somehow making it more realistic as I pretended to be a super die hard fan of the captain. "I was so happy I got teary-eyed all of a sudden. I'm sorry!"

Then my attention was shifted right towards Lady Margaret, who's now in awe upon my bewildered reaction. "And you too, Lady Margaret! I am also a fan of yours!"

If she starts asking what song I like her playing the most, I am definitely screwed. However, she didn't and just chuckled at my reaction.

"Please, you don't have to cry. It's just us." Lady Margaret waves her hand off.

To make it more realistic, I turned around to face Danny and ask him, "Can I borrow a pen and paper, please?"

Danny immediately nods and hands me over a piece of paper and his fountain pen which I grabbed from him in haste and dashed my way back to the couple.

"Can I please have your autograph? The both of you?" 

Smiling at me, Lady Margaret replies, "Absolutely."

She takes my pen off from me, looks for a flat surface to write on, and starts affixing her signature on the paper. Lady Margaret then passes on the ballpen to Captain Alex.

"Do I really have to do this? I am not a celebrity, unlike you."

"The girl wants your autograph. So write it for her and let's get out of here quickly." 

Shrugging, Captain Alex also affixed his signature on the paper and I watched in awe as I witnessed how clean his handwriting is. For a guy like him, there isn't that much who has this clean handwriting as his.

Lady Margaret must have seen me staring at her boyfriend that much, thus when Captain Alex was about to hand me over the paper, she snatched it from him and gave it to me. Smiling awkwardly, I thanked her.

"Now, we have to go somewhere else. We can't miss this show for the world." Lady Margaret demanded, pulling the captain's arm to exit the store as soon as possible.

"But I thought you wanted to purchase a---"

"Nevermind. We'll just do it some other time."

"Oh. Okay then."

They were about to leave the store when I called out their attention. "Uhm, the fountain pen, please."

That made the captain stop in his tracks, and so does Lady Margaret. In that moment when Captain Alex walked towards me, it's like time itself had slowed down, and all I could see was him and him alone. His every step makes my heart pound, and the way he looks directly in my eyes weakens my knees for some unknown reason. I can feel the urge to cry coming back to me once again, but I stopped myself for as long as I could.

What is exactly wrong with me?

"Here you go," he finally hands over the pen towards me, snapping me back to reality. 

With a shaky hand and a pounding chest, I grab the pen from him. Our skin brushed in the process, and I felt that electric current suddenly electrocuting me for a split second. He must have felt it too, since Captain Alex lifts his head up in surprise.

We remained like that for a few more seconds before Lady Margaret stole his attention away from me.

"Hey, Alex. Quit strolling there and let's get to the stadium right away!"

"Right," I saw the captain blinking his eyes for a few seconds as he shakes his head in disbelief. After that, I could now see him running his way back to his girlfriend and they finally got out of the store.

I was left, once again, with this empty feeling inside my chest.

What just happened back there?

***

Later that night, I couldn't stop myself from crying. I have been like this for a few nights already that I started seeking some professional help from a healer. But no matter what I do, or no matter what pill I drink to stabilize my mood, it just won't work at all. I lost my appetite after hours of bawling my eyes out and immediately fell asleep. 

In my dreams, I saw the face of that man once again. We were sitting on a sidewalk at a beautiful night where the moon shines the brightest. In my vision, he looks kind of drunk and starts to say something gibberish in that state. I don't know what we are doing at that time, or why the hell are we sitting on a damn sidewalk late at night where passersby might see us. 

But what I do know is that I kind of look happy in this scene.

"I'm sorry…" he says all of a sudden, his words a little bit gibberish but I could now make the words out of his mouth.

My eyebrows hunched together. What was it that he is sorry for?

Then I heard myself saying the exact same thing that my other self has asked. "For what?"

"For dragging you to do the task… I didn't know what to do, and so I used you to cover up the problem that we are all facing. For that, I am so, so, sorry."

I really wanted to ask him what he meant, but that scene immediately dies and the next several scenes flashed inside my head on a whim with every moment that I had with him. What… What is the meaning to all of this?

And before I could even get an answer, morning finally came, waking my senses up with the blaring sound coming from my alarm clock.

I found myself panting as I got up from bed with a really bad headache and eyes that sting for crying so much yesterday night. Since today is Saturday, and the last day of the month,  if I must add, it would be appropriate to see my alienist and have her check my current mental condition.

And that's what I did. After taking a shower and fixing myself some breakfast, I immediately put on my coat that I had bought at Central Town the other week and went outside.

The weather is getting chillier as December is fast approaching. I remembered the snow had started falling in late September, but it abruptly stopped. And now that the holidays are just around the corner, I believe we will be enjoying another round of snow in the first or second week of December.

Weather is getting weirder and weirder as time passes by huh?

I took a carriage to get into the facility as soon as possible. Once I arrived and paid the horsemen for my fare, I hurriedly went inside while darting a keen look to my surroundings to see if anyone I know is seeing me right now or what.

When I was relieved that there was no one around, I proceeded inside. Spotless white walls and floor were the first thing that greeted me, and the ambiance is not really that nice when you find yourself in a mental facility. I inspected the series of doors that I now pass by. And in a matter of seconds, I was able to immediately spot the door that has the number 45 in it before I knock on the door to let the alienist know of my presence.

After three consecutive knocks, I twitched the doorknob and pushed the door inside. The manly yet friendly face of my attending physician, Martin Cooper. Smiling at me, he says in delight, "Ms. Lancaster, what a surprise to see you here. I suppose you're still not well, hmm?"

I discussed to him what I experienced yesterday, about seeing Captain Alex back at the store and in my dreams as well. The attending physician starts to tap his fingers in his table as he thinks of something to say about that.

Finally, he stops tapping his fingers and looks at me in the eye.

"So you said that this person just occurred in your dreams for the first time, right?" he asks and I nodded. "Then that only means one thing…"

I lean a little bit closer as I anticipate what he is about to say. Mr. Cooper, on the other hand, clears his throat first before proceeding with what he is about to say next.

"You have to talk to this person and know what is your connection with him, as soon as possible."