LIGHTNOVELONLINE Four Hundred And Ninety-Seven
Hisui clutched at her head, looking perturbed. After a moment, she narrowed her inky-black eyes at me, and seemed to have made up her mind. “This is not your true Tribulation, little Qi Refiner. Merely the fury of the Heavens for your crass interference. But it seems that you might even survive. Since you refused my generous offer…” She reached up and pulled, and several strands of her purplish-pink hair came away and she twisted them into a strand of loops, before a small bronze bell appeared and was attached to it. “…I am curious, just how willyou face your true Tribulations in the future? This…” She gestured, and I could tell she was considering my bonds, and the voices of Eri, Daiyu and my sis, who were still encouraging me to do my best, hang on and not give up. “…will not save you. A true Tribulation of Lightning and Wind will not be so easily misled.”
“Your point?” I asked, as I began circulating my Spirit Water. If Daiyu and the others felt this was the key to changing my probable demise, who was I to question them? It makes sense anyway. Spirit Water was flowing into me through my Silver Connection, which was also Daiyu, somehow. The flavour, if that was even the right word, was nostalgic, reminding me of both Daiyu and Shaeula.
“I am simply curious.” Hisui smiled. I felt the tugging of her Charm but having been exposed to similar a number of times, I shrugged it off, and her smile changed, growing sullen. “Yes, it seems I am not at my best. This world has changed over the years. You will press on, continue to Cultivate, will you not?”
“Of course.” Even if it’s not about power, I promised Daiyu, and I want to help her reach her full potential, realise her dreams. After all… that’s my Dao, isn’t it?
“Yes, once the path is embarked upon, Cultivators follow it until the end. You have great heights to climb…” Hisui observed. “But should you surpass that fake…” She sneered over at where the other Tiānyì were tearing shreds of the monk apart, feasting. “…and the true Chaotic Winds blow, you will face might far in excess of what you repelled here. I wish to see it. To sate my… curiosity.” She licked her lips again seductively.
“Sorry, but I don’t like you very much. You’ve tried to kill me, despite calling it mercy, and…” I glanced down at Tamamo-no-Mae’s still body.
“...give that up. There is no saving her. With no consciousness, one does not have the heart to resist the Winds, nor our tender mercies.”
“She isn’t even part of this Tribulation. Can’t you just overlook her?” I asked. The younger Tiānyì who was toying with her scoffed.
“The meal is not as good as I had hoped, but it is my right to feast!”
“See? I’ve no need to offer any of you favours. I might be a pushover for women, but I have standards in who I roll over for.” I poked some harmless mockery at myself, but I was serious. The Spirit Water was surging around my sacral and lunar Chakras, overspilling, and my Eye, which was already being taxed observing the Wind and Lightning, sparked with amber letters.
Your Skill, Sacral Chakra Of High Moonlight Spirit Water has advanced from Rank 4 to Rank 5. Your Sacral Chakra now generates significantly more Water Elemental energy…
The sudden surge of Spirit Water within me as my body started producing more helped, but that alone wouldn’t be enough. Gingerly, delicately… I began to pass more of the burning golden lightning up to my Material body, which was in terrible shape. Not enough. But I’m also in a hurry… The Bezoar had finished drawing in and converting the remaining poison of the destroyed Sessho-seki into earth element, and using the fact that earth fed water, I poured it in, dissolving it, strengthening my water element. I fed my fire into the earth, and my wind into the fire, the four primary elements being consumed at an increasingly rapid rate, but swelling my Spirit Water commensurately.
Hisui looked at me, as if seeing what I was doing, and shrugged. “I am wounded. Is it not the dream of many men to die in the arms of a beautiful woman? Surely a kinder fate than being purified by Heavenly Lightning, or ground away to nothing by the endless Chaotic Winds. Besides… other, worse things than we are often called by the Winds, to test your resolve and Dao heart. But I… I will come again, and truly match wills with you. My sisters and I, if we hear your Tribulation, will come. Thus, my gift…”
She reached out, tying the bracelet of hair with the gentle bell around my left wrist, and the bell jangled softly in the Chaotic breeze. Moments later her black eyes went wide, and the darkness drained from them, revealing silver irises and deep blue pupils. She spat out some words I didn’t understand, other than one word, a name…
“Shèng dà Gōng zhǔ Jī' è de guǐ hún Taṇhā!” It sounded a little like ancient Chinese, perhaps it meant princess, or hungry, if it was referring to Taṇhā. Hisui was sweating now, her hands trembling a little, and I could see she was communicating with someone outside of the Tribulation. After a moment, Hisui looked at me accusingly.
“Just what is wrong with this backwater world? Why is Taṇhā here, and why dies she threaten me over you…?” Hisui blinked, realising she might have said too much. “I… I will have to carry news of this back to…”
“I wouldn’t.” I broke in. “You seem to know her, so you should be aware she’s quite a thirsty woman, and she has a habit of holding grudges. Butting into her business strikes me as a terrible plan.”
“Even she cannot interfere with a Tribulation…” Hisui mused, but her face fell. “Yet afterwards, indeed she could seek me out… but I have a duty to report these matters…” She was sweating now, silver droplets falling from her like light rain.
“Do you?” I wasn’t much aware of what went on in the Pantheons above. Tan had mentioned a little, but usually only to emphasise a point or entice us to support her. Seems like the Tiānyì are from Tan’s Pantheon then, or at least know of her… “She’s just attending to business down here, if you were smart you’d leave her alone to get on with it.” I waved my left arm, and her bell tinkled a little. “At least until you’ve seen my true Tribulation?” Offering the compromise, I smiled. Hisui paused, clearly torn, before letting out a bitter sigh.
“I was terribly excited, drawn into a Chaotic Wind Tribulation. Instead my sisters and I were faced with mere rancid scraps, and now this.”
“Don’t blame me, blame the Saint of Swallowing Sorrows.” I deflected. “Anyway, I suspect that if you are waiting for my Tribulation, you won’t be waiting decades or centuries. Give me a few years. You can keep quiet about Tan until then, right?”
“Tan?” Hisui said incredulously. “You would address noble Taṇhā, oldest and most powerful of the Three Cravings, eldest daughter of Mara, so familiarly, and moreover, a mere Cultivator, defending a Divine being? This… perplexes me.”
Her remaining sisters were watching on, and as this was happening, I had transferred almost all the golden lightning to my Material body. It was now burning down faster than I could repair it, even with the huge amounts of aether that Eri and the others were still funnelling to me. The Spirit Water isn’t enough, either… maybe if I… My water was not merely concentrated, potent High Spirit Water, from the lands of the Fae, but also infused with Moonlight. I have more of that… Pouring my Mangetsu, the Full Moon Light I possessed, into the Spirit Water, I tried to magnify its power. Ignoring the constant pressures on both my body and mind, I answered Hisui’s confusion. “Tan’s just Tan. Being powerful doesn’t make her any less a person. So if she’s got a problem, then of course I’ll step in. What are a mere few years down here on this isolated planet compared to up there in the higher Astral? There’s no benefit to you saying anything, and only demerits. Like I said, Tan holds grudges.”
Elder sister, we should say nothing…
It has nothing to do with us…
I do not want to be burned by her thirsty flames…
Her sisters will not thank us anyway…
“Best quit while you are ahead, elder sister.” The orange-haired one feasting on Tamamo-no-Mae declared. The beautiful, busty body with nine bushy tails was starting to become transparent, her fur now almost like glass, her skin pale. No good. Time is running out. Come on, come on…
Feeling my desperation, Daiyu and Eri were squeezing out everything they could, while my sis was sending me inane thoughts, though filled with support and hope. The first thing I had to do was cut off the Wind and Lightning, and I now allowed the Chaotic Winds to flow through me as well, using Spirit Water to direct it around my body. The effort was excruciating, but rewarding.
Your Skill, Water Manipulation has advanced from Rank 5 to Rank 6, passing the first Bottleneck... It was suddenly easier to move the Spirit Water within me. Herding the lightning towards my Material right arm, letting the Winds flow through me, but blocking it as it tried to return, I attempted to convince the Tiānyì to relinquish Tamamo-no-Mae.
“You should quit too. After all, you said your meal is disappointing. Instead, I can put in a good word to Tan for you. That’s surely worth more than eating some shreds of her spirit?”
“Nice try.” She laughed my offer off. “I would rather eat now, than worry about tomorrow on an empty stomach. Besides… she is eroding away. It is over. Just be happy it looks like you will survive, and have caught in interest of elder sister.”
“It is not he who has my interest.” Hisui disagreed, pouting. “But this world, this situation is most perplexing. But our time is running out…” The Winds were dying down now the monk was dead. “Give up on her. She is finished. Do not let your concern lead you to stumble at the final hurdle. It would be a waste for your spirit to be purified to nothing, blown away on the Winds.”
“That almost sounded like you are worried about me.” I snorted. Desperately I needed more Spirit Water, and as I poured in all my Mangetsu, I felt more elements coming through my Silver Connection.
I… refining these all to Qi is… challenging. I am not sure how much longer I can last. But Shaeula is strong. I envy her. Wind, earth and fire were trickling into me, and though it was now Qi, a refined version, purer yet having slightly less strength, I could still feed it to my Chakras. Even Daiyu’s healing was struggling to cope with the strain, so I had to move fast. Let the body break, that’s not important. What is… Switching the aether flooding me from Ether Healing, I focussed most of my Split Thoughts onto the image of water. Turning aether to an element was possible, I had done it before, but wasteful, very wasteful and inefficient. But beggars can’t be choosers, unless they want to go hungry…
My Material and Astral bodies were suddenly starting to break apart, though the Material one was corroding at a far more rapid rate, as almost all of the Lightning and much of the Wind had been concentrated there by my efforts. As Hisui looked on, startled, wondering why I was beginning to fail, just as victory seemed certain, I poured out aether in a bottomless tide, feeling the thoughts of those who had contributed. There’s so many. My girls, the trainees, the Fae, even the Tengu from Mount Atago, everyone is giving their all. If my path is Connections, Bonds, then how can I not walk this, when everyone is pouring out their strength to pave my way?
Water boiled within me, stronger than ever, the sacral and lunar Chakras suddenly filled to bursting, before with a feeling of something within me shifting, more amber messages flared in my vision, and Spirit Water gushed forth, driving the last of the Lightning and Wind up through my Silver Connection…
Your Skill, Lunar Chakra Of Seven Primal Elements Of Wood has increased from Rank 4 to Rank 5, reaching the first Bottleneck…
Your Class, True Faeduine, has increased from Level Five to Level Seven…
Your Charm, Majesty…
Your Skill, Sacral Chakra Of High Moonlight Spirit Water has advanced from Rank 5 to Rank 6, shattering the first Bottleneck…
Your Skill, Water Manipulation has advanced from Rank 6 to Rank 7…
The messages were dizzying, and my subtle bodies were close to breaking from the sudden internal pressure of my rising strength, counterbalancing the fury without. Now is the moment. Now or never…
My Split Thoughts all converged on my Material body, leaving only a fragment in my Silver Connection. With a great roar, I poured all the coalescing Spirit Water, shining a brilliant orange streaked with beautiful indigo and silver, into my right arm, surrounding, caging in the Lightning and Wind. That done, I tore my arm free at the shoulder, blood gouting red onto the burning ground. Around me, ash and falling debris from the Mount Nasu volcanoes hid my struggle, but everything hung in the balance. Uranai, my death was almost certain. But… almost isn’t definite. And working together, we can change things…
“Now for the hard part…” I regretted speaking, as my lungs burned, hot ashes and wind drawn in. The bonds were still sending over aether, and I grabbed at it, as well as what little elemental energies were left, and started crafting. My arm, full of Purifying Lightning and Chaotic Wind was the material, and drawing on inspiration from the Sessho-seki, indeed, using some of the materials I had salvaged from the shattered rock, I worked at a frenetic pace, knowing I had no time to make it perfect, or even good, only good enough.
Your Class, Shaper Of Flesh And Spirit, has increased from Level One to Level Three. You can now control Elemental energies and Aether within yourself to a higher degree, and can manipulate stronger sources of Elemental energy and Adherence…
You have gained a Skill, Shapercraft. You can use parts of your body or the bodies of others as materials to craft weapons, armour, trinkets, and other wonders. Your ability to control the flow and resistance of Elemental energies, Aether, Adherence and ????????? within subtle bodies has increased, and effects that boost Material and Spiritual properties, as well as heal and restore subtle bodies, are enhanced. [Class: Noble] [Type: Artifice]
It's really been a good few days for me in terms of gaining new and stronger Skills and Classes… My thoughts were scattering, the frantic effort of trying to finish the creation I was working on. The Spirit Water inside froze, turning the arm a deep blue, threaded with veins of the same type as the Sessho-Seki had. I poured out my spatial element and darkness element, infusing the arm, and soon it was done. It’s a rush job, I’ll fix it later, but…
Crude Right Arm Of Tribulation is a…
My Eye started giving me the description, but I had little time. My Material body was barely more than a charred skeleton with my Eye and a few scraps of burned flesh and seared organs, so I retrieved Daiyu’s ring and stuffed the Arm inside, before dismissing what was left of my form, my Split Thoughts returning to my Astral body. I didn’t die, but I might as well have…
Taking a shuddering breath, I looked at Hisui, who was shaking her head, long hair fluttering in the fading Chaotic Winds. “The Tribulation has passed you by. You did survive…”
“Of course. You seem surprised.” I snorted, taking a long, shuddering breath, memories of the pain I had endured slowly fading.
Did it work? Have we done enough? Eri’s thoughts came through, echoed by Daiyu and my sis, so I took a moment to praise them.
Yeah. I feel like shit, and I’m not kidding that even with all your help I’m totally out of strength, but… I’ll live. The problem is…
That’s only half the battle, right bro?
Indeed. If it was simply a matter of surviving, we could have avoided this trial. But we need Tamamo-no-Mae.
My sis and Daiyu knew my dilemma. As Hisui answered me, shaking her head in disappointment, I glanced down at the Kitsune in my arms. Sure, from everything I’ve seen, she’s not exactly a good person. In fact, she’s awful, capricious, whimsical and cruel to those she has no reason to care for. But… she’s also who I need.
“Do not even think about it.” Hisui warned, seeing where I was looking. “There is naught you can do. The Heavens cannot be cheated…”
“Of course they can. The monk here did it…” I disagreed, forcing my tired mind to work.
“And where is he now? Punishment deferred is not punishment dismissed.” Hisui scoffed.
“Well, if I can delay it until I am ready to face my true Tribulations, I’m all for it. After all…” Despite the ragged, defeated state I was in, I had confidence we could still succeed. Tsukiko’s Fate was absolutely certain. Compared to that, almost certain to die doesn’t have the same ring of finality to it. “…you say the Heavens wish to test my Dao heart? Well, let me show them just how strong it is.”
I merged my Silver Connection with the phantom tail I held, mimicking the way that I saved Daiyu and my sis when their Silver Cords were cut off from reaching outside the Sessho-seki. Immediately I could feel Tamamo-no-Mae, though it was like looking into a kaleidoscope of shattered stained glass, a mix of fragmentary memories, dreams and colours, all of which were rapidly sunk into a deep black darkness, vanishing from view.
“Get out, she is mine!” I found myself in a dark, lonely space, Tamamo-no-Mae wrapped in chains, held up similarly to how the monk had treated her, the rusted links stretching off into the infinite darkness around her. The Tiānyì rushed forwards, her orange hair fluttering behind her, her beautiful young face angry, her ample bosom heaving in annoyance. “I will evict you by force. I am not scared of Taṇhā!”
“Is that right?” A familiar voice echoed out, and my sis appeared too, Daiyu having materialised moments before, since they were still entwined deeply around my Silver Connection. “Wow, gloomy place. I feel sad for her. Oh yeah… Tan. I’ll be sure to tell her that you’re picking a fight.” My sis winked at me. “Oh wow bro, you look like utter shit.”
“Thanks.” I laughed dryly. “You try getting blasted by lightning, eroded by wind and harassed by these women constantly. Then I had to do some extreme surgery just to get by. I can see why this was a good chance of death. And the worst is likely yet to come.”
“Do not ignore me!” The Tiānyì stamped her feet angrily on the darkness, and my sis snorted.
“Wow, big. Don’t get any ideas, bro. If you have to pick up more women, you missed a really heartfelt moment from Bell. I think… you need to be a man and romance her, it’s pitiful otherwise!”
“I said do not ignore me!” she repeated, and outside I could hear the songs of the Tiānyì again, and the cold, brutal wind of the Tribulation was starting to caress my skin, as it echoed around the infinite darkness here like a howling ghost.
The fury of the Winds was avoided, yet back into the storm he goes…
The cleansing of the Lightning was evaded, yet deep into the storm he plunges…
The whispers of our sister he denied, yet with ears wide open he returns…
Pitiful foolish Cultivator, tossing aside your victory for defeat once more…
The harmony of the Tiānyì made me shiver, and I could feel their anger, but Daiyu was the first to dismiss them. “I have never heard of beings such as you. I knew of the Lightning from our histories, but… these Winds. It is refreshing to know that there are peaks beyond the peaks, just as I suspected. But as for ignoring you… it is best that way.” Daiyu took up a fighting stance. “Begone, woman. Tamamo-no-Mae is under Akio’s protection, and none may harm who he chooses to defend!”
“Well said!” My sis drew her bow too, though considering where we were, I imagined we weren’t really physically present, more… representations… of ourselves. “If you want to attract my bro’s attention, just keep jiggling up and down like that, but do it quietly in the corner while we work!”
“Sis, that’s rude.” I shook my head, before apologising to the now-confused Tiānyì. “Don’t worry, I’m not looking at you in a lewd way. Hisui neither. But… this is my path, you understand? My Dao. My way is Connection, and I already have a connection to Tamamo-no-Mae, as fleeting as it may be. In fact…”
With a sudden thought, a blinking, slightly surprised Nebisuki appeared, her form here fully restored, her missing tails and leg back, though she looked wan and haggard, clearly suffering. Seeing Tamamo-no-Mae now chained in front of her, she blinked, trying to catch up.
“…I’m not the only one. The Winds test my Dao, you all said, well if I let you have Tamamo-no-Mae now, then I would be betraying my path, my Dao. If so, there’s no way I should have passed this mock-Tribulation. So step aside and we can part here, if not friends, then as acquaintances.”
The Tiānyì seemed confused, perhaps not used to entering into negotiations. I heard the voice of Hisui from without, complaining that I was a fool, but I ignored that. I may well be a fool, risking everything when I managed to survive, but… that’s the road I’m walking. Besides, I believe we can do it together, and if we do… save the seeds, and build a foundation here that will withstand whatever comes…
“So where is this?” My sis asked, looking around. “I’m not here really, am I? It’s just my thoughts.”
I nodded, able to feel the connections between us and my Astral body still intact. “I think you’re right.”
“It is written of in the old texts, in the most ancient of the jade tags the Incorruptible Jade possessed.” Daiyu observed. “The inner self, sometimes called the Mental World, or the Sea of Thoughts. Cultivators who reached a certain level of strength could manifest their own personal worlds internally. Perhaps those that reach beyond Saint might even be able to express it externally… I would not be surprised if beings of great power have the same ability.”
“So this is grandmother’s world now?” Nebisuki said, trembling, her spirit weak and feeble from her injuries. Though it seems Shaeula has stabilised her. “How pitiful. There is naught here but the darkness, the silence.”
“You are ignoring me again!” the Tiānyì protested, as Hisui also found her way here, followed by a number of the other Tiānyì. Seeing them, the first Tiānyì tried to make herself look bigger, more threatening. “Sisters, this one is mine, I claimed her!”
“You already said the meal was terrible. It’s because of this, right?” I gestured to her desolate world, the Winds blowing in slowly eroding the edges, even the darkness slowly yielding. “In that case, what have you got to lose? If we can’t help her, she’ll die, but if we can restore Tamamo-no-Mae to a more normal state, won’t your potential meal taste better?”
Hisui narrowed her eyes, perhaps wondering what my angle was, so I didn’t hide it. “We can fight now, or fight later, but why not see if we can make Tamamo-no-Mae something worth fighting over first?”
“Are you sure, bro?” My sis asked, before realising she was speaking out loud. She tried to communicate with her thoughts, but since we were seemingly mental projections ourselves, following the bonds that tied us together through my Silver Connection, our thoughts were expressed for everyone to hear. She looked at the Tiānyì before saying her piece. “They might be strong, you know? And…” She left unsaid that I was in no state to fight, and expecting Daiyu to was impossible as well, since she was ragged and drained from Qi Refining and passing it to me as best she could. Obviously Nebisuki is no use either, and my sis certainly can’t do it alone.
“Again, one step at a time, sis.” I nodded to show that I understood her misgivings, but then winked. The orange-haired Tiānyì tilted her head, confused, but my sis merely shrugged.
“If you say so bro. Oh… I think I see. That could work.”
I hoped she had understood our trump card here. Firstly, I wasn’t sure of the strength of the beings blown in by the Tribulation. They could hardly be weak, but they hadn’t directly attacked us, instead relying on the Winds and our own mental weaknesses. And despite everything, I’m still confident I can repel their temptations.
Hisui was the one to break the awkward silence that fell on the dark void. “It matters little. Perhaps I will get my meal yet. If you fail…” She seemed eager, only to suddenly widen her silver eyes, alarmed. Yes, she gets it. Hisui grabbed a child-like Tiānyì who was skulking around, and rattled off some words in her indecipherable tongue, and all I understood was the name Taṇhā. The young-looking girl seemed terrified, but Hisui tightened her grip and shook the girl, before she nodded, her eyes teary. With that Hisui tossed her away and she vanished, and while this was happening, I asked Nebisuki a question.
“Do you know a being called Sekka?”
Nebisuki seemed surprised, but nodded, tails wagging. “I know her. She is what you mortals call a snow woman, a Yuki-onna. She dwells in the far north, on the island humans name Hokkaido. She is not one of the Parade, but even Great Nurarihyon respects her. I am curious, why speak of her now?”
I didn’t doubt the visions were real, but getting conformation is nice. Before I could answer Hisui sighed. “The Laws are followed by all, but you are not wrong. Noble Taṇhā and her sisters are never ones to forget a slight. I have no wish to provoke her for no gain.” That said, she eyed me with curiosity and hunger, as well as a wry, knowing smile. “The Winds may be dying down, but this heartless shell will fail at any moment. I am amazed you escaped the Tribulation, but you are spent. Even your bonds that brought you this far are dwindling…”
“She’s right, bro. What’s your plan?” My sis asked again, worried, but stepping closer, ready to defend me, whether she could win or not, and seeing that, I shook my head.
“Our bonds aren’t spent yet…” Sure, what aether I’m receiving has slowed significantly, but I am still getting a top-up through Eri. In fact… Eri, how many are left to contribute?
Not many. And to be honest, Chiasa-san and Chiaki-san can’t hold on much longer. When you get back, they need a reward, they’ve gone beyond their limits many times over to be of help to you. But if we force it… a few Fae are left, so… Eri finished explaining, and I was now aware of the bounds of what I could do here. At least with my lunar Chakra having Ranked up, my aether regeneration has also increased substantially. I will hardly have time to take it easy, but every little helps. If before was about quantity, everyone pitching in to overwhelm the Winds and Lightning with endless aether and elemental energies, this… this is going to be surgical, all about efficiency…
“Yes, I too am curious. We all are.” Hisui spoke for the Tiānyì, the one who was to claim Tamamo-no-Mae nodding rapidly. “Just what are you going to achieve here?”
“That’s the question, isn’t it? Why not wait and see?” I turned to Daiyu, Aiko and Nebisuki. “All right then. I don’t have a huge amount to go on with, but I have enough to start. A question.”
As they all looked at me eagerly, I spoke, posing my thought. “This darkness… it’s cold and empty, but not entirely empty. What’s here?”
“That is obvious. Tamamo-no-Mae, and her chains…” Daiyu observed, before smiling happily, having understood, the expression on her face charming in its rarity. “…of course. If this is her Sea of Thoughts, her consciousness made manifest, then if she is still within it…”
“Then we can wake her up!” My sis agreed, pumping her fist. “Way to never give up, bro! You’ve certainly changed.”
“Oh, has he?” Nebisuki asked, momentarily curious, before her ears lay flat on her skull, her tails drooping. “No, that matters little now. What does is grandmother seems lifeless, insensible. And she is bound in so many chains…”
“Yes, so… we have to break her chains. But I suspect doing it via force here either wouldn’t work, or might even damage her, speeding the erosion of the winds. No… I think what we have to do is stimulate her to break her chains herself!” And I have the key to that, I think. Though the question is, can I start the process before I run out of power, before she dies, or… before Hisui and her fellows decide this game isn’t to their tastes? With those thoughts running through my head, I tried to project confidence. Honestly, I’m not sure if this would even work, or what the consequences would be. After all… it might not just be the Spirit Water that made the difference, and I’m not out of danger yet. But… “Fortunately, I have at least some of the keys to her chains, I think. So…” Taking a deep breath, I began…
