Of Men and Spiders

Cleo watched as Alice put away a truly impressive amount of the green paste Charlotte had brought for herself and the girl. She knew from experience that the stuff was bland to the point of defying any expectations, yet the younger girl shoveled away mouthful after mouthful.

Alice seemed to notice the attention Cleo was directing her way and looked up. "What's the matter? Don't you have enough to eat?"

Cleo just shook her head. "No, I was just wondering, how can you eat that stuff so eagerly?"

Alice looked at her bowl, then back to Cleo. "Well, to me, there's no difference between this and what you eat."

Cleo wanted to argue, but that was when Scott interjected. "That's one of the few areas Alice's new body is...lacking. Charlotte never gave it a sense of taste because she doesn't require one, either. They can digest just about any organic matter they choose to, though some provide a better nutritional return than others. Since the body wasn't originally built with Alice in mind, there was no reason to include it."

For a moment, Cleo thought about asking if Alice missed eating food like she used to but then thought better of it. Of course, if the girl did, then bringing it up like that would be downright cruel. Instead, she chose to change the subject to something else Scott mentioned. "So, why was the body built if not for Alice?"

This time, it was Charlotte who answered, looking up from her own bowl. "That body was designed as a prototype for better interacting with humans. I was hoping that humans would be more inclined to speak with me if I had more characteristics similar to your own. However, once it was repurposed, I decided to leave it unique for the sake of Alice, as I've observed individuality is important to humans. Although I may revisit a similar concept once some of our more pressing issues have been resolved."

Cleo still wasn't entirely used to the much larger spider/bug centaur Charlotte sitting at the table eating casually with them. But she was smart enough to realize she was the odd man out in this group, not the giant alien, so she kept her disquiet to herself, instead deciding to have a little fun with Scott. She took another bite, closing her eyes and leaning forward, making a slight "Mmmm" sound as she pulled the serving off the fork. When she suddenly cracked an eye open, she caught Scott hurriedly looking away. When he looked back, she gave him a wink, just for good measure.

-

Alice watched Cleo and her brother pretend to focus on everything but each other, and it was kind of funny. Of course, she kept that to herself, mostly. Charlotte, sensing that this was something Alice didn't want to talk out loud about, spoke directly into her mind. "What is it that amuses you so much about this meal?"

Grinning but not laughing, Alice responded silently. "Those two! They're being silly!"

Charlotte looked back and forth between the two, who were now talking about how Scott was getting seeds and roots to keep his garden going, then looked back to Alice. "You've never thought gardening was funny before..."

Alice rolled her eyes. "It's not what they're saying that's funny! It's what they're not saying!"

Charlotte still seemed confused. "There are far more things they're not saying than they are, most of which is nonsensical. Is that what is humorous?"

Alice shook her head. "No! It's the things they want to say but aren't saying that's so funny!"

That only seemed to confuse Charlotte more. "Please clarify."

This time, Alice giggled out loud before answering, but thankfully, no one other than Charlotte seemed to realize. "Aren't they cute together?"

If Charlotte was confused by how the question related, she didn't show it. "I lack the context to properly judge human 'cuteness,' though I suppose in my eyes, both you and Scott are 'cute.' I have noticed Cleo uses bright metallic inserts and ink-saturated dermal layers to make herself more colorful and draw attention. Is that cute?"

This time, when Alice sniggered, both Scott and Cleo looked at her. "What's so funny over there, munchkin?"

Caught in the act, Alice decided to play cool. "Oh, nothing. Charlotte just made a funny joke it all!"

Cleo looked back and forth between Alice and Scott. "Is that something she does? Tell jokes?"

Scott smiled in a way that indicated both annoyance and amusement. "Well, kind of, though they are often what you would call dry humor, and I'm never one hundred percent sure it's intentional..."

With the two of them talking again, Alice silently responded to Charlotte's question. "I don't know about that, but they're cute together! They both like each other but are afraid to come out and say it, so neither seems to realize they like each other! It's like we're in on a secret they haven't caught on to yet!"

Charlotte seemed surprised in her response. "They don't realize they are attracted to each other? But they both produce many pheromones in each other's company! How can they be so unaware?"

Alice rolled her eyes again as she answered. "People can't feel pheromones like you, and this body you gave me can. You just like someone, or you don't. But I think it's cute this way, don't you?"

Charlotte seemed to think on it for a moment. "I think it is inefficient, but in fairness, it seems that human inefficiency often leads to beneficial if unexpected outcomes, so I will withhold judgment at this time."

Alice kept her laughter more quiet this time. "You can't fool me the way you can everyone else! I know you're just a big softy under all that smartness!"

Charlotte did not respond, but Alice could sense an underlying amusement as she resumed eating.

-

For some reason, Scott felt like he was missing out on some joke everyone else was in on. Still, his sister was in an excellent mood, judging by all the giggling on her side of the table, and Cleo seemed to enjoy the company as well. Come to think of it, this was the first time all four of them had really hung out like this if you discounted the time in the garden room. Cleo had been in such shock the whole time he wasn't sure that counted.

However, Scott couldn't help but notice Cleo seemed to really enjoy teasing him. After she finished her plate and sat back, the pirate girl laughed. "You know, there's nothing sexier than a guy who knows how to cook! Keep that up, and I just might fall for you!"

Another giggle from the table's other side meant Alice had found that line funny. Still, in her own teasing sort of way, it was a compliment, and he wasn't immune to a little buttering up, though that didn't mean he couldn't use this to his benefit as well. "Well, so long as you keep up the good behavior, maybe this can become a regular thing."

Cleo's wicked smile meant he'd just given her more ammunition somehow, and she didn't make him wait long. "Well, if that's what it'll take, I'll promise to be a good girl!"

That made Scott's brain freeze for a moment while it processed the implications while there was more giggling from the peanut gallery, but he just decided to let it go. Instead, he stood up and started clearing the table as he answered. "Fair enough, though, for the record, I'm not certain if teaching my sister how to tease men counts as good behavior."