Chapter 340 Learning Xavier's Past
Xavier hissed and groaned, his face contorting into a pained expression. He took a couple of deep breaths, trying to ignore the stinging sensation and working up the courage to continue with that he was doing. He heard a surprised gasp from within the room.
"Why didn't you wait for me?" Lorraine complained seeing him sit over the edge of the bed and reeling from the pain of removing the old bandage from his injury to start dressing it. She had just come out of the bathroom, already dressed in her night wear, ready to call it a night.
"I wanted to get this over and done with. Plus, I didn't want to bother you", he muttered only to receive a glare from her as she rushed to his side. "Sorry."
He held up his shirt and let her take over. She blew on it trying to ease the pain while removing the bandage. Although she was focused on the task at hand, she could not help but steal glances at the middle of his chest that he had exposed while holding up his shirt then quickly looked back down. He suddenly chuckled.
"What?" She asked quietly, now cleaning up and gently dabbing medication.
"I still can't believe those three showed up in a matching set of PJs for Game time", he continued with a chuckle before he flinched from the pain.
"Sorry. Amy said she planned for matching outfits for them for the rest of the weekend", Lorraine could not help her smile. "I think it's cute."
"That's just it. Zach doesn't do cute. You've seen the ice block he usually is", he joked.
"Yeah, but he's not like that with Amy. Love does that to you. All done", she had now finished plasting a new bandage on the injury.
"Love", he said quietly.
He was staring into space when he said this, already fallen deep into thoughts. What a bumpy ride it had been for him trying to find what his brother easily found.
Why was it all so difficult for him? He felt a warm hand on his cheek, snapping him out of his thoughts before Lorraine pressed her lips onto his. She did not deepen it, it was a simple kiss, yet it came with warmth and comfort. There was also another feeling that came with the simple kiss but he couldn't put his finger on it.
"Aren't you curious?" He asked when she broke the kiss.
"My best guess is it has to do with your past?" She cocked her head to the side.
He smiled gently, caressing her cheek as he spoke "And you don't want to know about my past?"
"It's the past for a reason. Our present is all that matters to me", she stated. She could guess he probably had ghosts, something he didn't wish to revisit. He sighed in relief when he heard that until the next words she uttered. "But there's one thing I'm curious about. The scar on your chest."
An unamused laugh left his lips. It was more like he was mocking himself. She didn't want to know his past, but that was his past. Sensing his silence, she got the message. "It's okay. You don't have to tell-"
"I was shot."
Lorraine's heart dropped to the pit of her stomach and she froze in his hold. Judging from the graveness in his tone, it was definitely a horrific past. But two questions quickly popped into her head: who would do such a thing to him? And why?
"By my ex."
"Xavier..."
"It's okay."
He brought her up and lay them on the bed side by side. He held onto her tightly, trying to comfort himself while he recounted his past with Irene. His tone was quiet into the late night but she could hear the frustration as he spoke.
"She showed up after six months of disappearing on me. Despite that, a part of me wanted to hold on", he let out an unamused chuckle. "But that quickly changed when the first thing she did was demand for money, a ridiculous amount of money. No apology, no explanation, she simply wanted money. I got mad and that's when we started arguing, shouting at the top of our lungs. She wanted the money, she felt entitled, while I wanted answers.
"Seeing as she wasn't getting anywhere, she took out a gun and threatened to kill herself. She said she would rather die than walk out empty handed on our relationship but I forced her to point it to my chest. If anyone deserved to die, it was me, she had bled me dry, she had killed me emotionally, she might as well have done so physically. So I told her, no, demanded she shoot me."
He exhaled deeply and pulled her closer, steadying himself before he got to the dreadful part. "There was a bit of a struggle for the gun, but I easily overpowered her, challenging her to shoot me. I remember these to be the last words I said to her 'if you want, tell that scumbag to grow a pair and face me instead of sending his little wife'.
"She stopped for a second, probably stunned that I found out about her being married, that she colluded with her husband to use me and run me dry. During the six months she disappeared, I did some digging and I found out. But I didn't want to confront her, because that would confirm my reality. Ignorance is bliss, right? I hoped she would come back, and she did only to crash the fake reality I had built.
"I couldn't read her emotion after that because the next thing I remember is falling to the ground after taking a hit. But what was more painful was watching her abandon me there. If not for Zach, I wouldn't be here right now. I owe my life to him and a lot more to my family. I was a mess after that but they were there for me through and through."
Lorraine was already in tears, feeling angry and sad for him at the same time. All he did was love, and a bullet to his chest was what he got in return. She was silently grateful to his family for saving him. What a dark time it was for the man.
"Was she caught? Is she serving her sentence for- for- ..... for doing that to you?" Lorraine could hardly contain her anger as she asked this and sniffled too.
He lifted her head to wipe her tears. "Zach got rid of her and her family. It's like they never existed. They're probably somewhere in the world paying for their sins."
"Good. How could she take someone's life so lightly? All you did was love her! Was it too much for her to do the same? Didn't she have an ounce of a conscious or humanity in her???? I swear to God-!"
She was interrupted by Xavier's intense gaze watching her as she ranted on while breathing heavily in anger. "What?"
He chuckled and shook his head, "Nothing."
She sighed deeply and cupped his cheek, "You're amazing. For giving love a chance despite the countless times you've been disappointed. You deserve a lot more than that, someone to love you right. Although I'm inexperienced, I want to give you just that and hopefully I'll do it right."
He pulled her into his embrace to feel her warmth against him. "You're doing a lot more than you think. I don't think I'll ever meet someone like you and I don't intent to find out. I know it's too early but I strongly believe you're all that I need."
Being with Lorraine was so simple, Xavier didn't feel like he needed to try extra hard. Without realizing, she made the matters of the heart simple for him. It was a comfortable place for him, a place he felt started to feel like home. The two basked in each other's warmth and comfort when realization hit.
"Wait, is this... Is this your first relationship?" He pulled away to have a good look at her.
"Is that.... Is that a problem?" Her face heated up and she avoided his gaze.
"Quite the opposite", he smiled.
"But I may not know certain things", she started, unsure and bearing her insecurities to him.
"And that's okay. That will make it even more special. It may come as a surprise but I also don't know everything but I'm going to try and do everything right by you."
She returned his smile before he pressed his lips to hers. Lorraine was so innocent, just thinking of her untouched body that was pressed to him right now. He hugged her and groaned in the crook of her neck. "Uggghhhhh! This is going to be hard!"
"Aren't you already?" She questioned cheekily.
"Oh! You got jokes Lorraine. Very funny", he countered in annoyance while she laughed.
Xavier had been through a lot. She may not know much about love but she meant it when she said she'd try. She could only hope, this would be a start of a worriless journey of their future.....