Chapter 77: a certain man's melancholy
LI JUN let out a happy sigh. He finally signed the trading treaty with the King of Albion today. If he ignored the fact that the King seemed to be in a very bad mood, then he could say that the signing went smoothly. Now, all Li Jun had to do was to go back home alive and his mission for coming here in Albion would be accomplished.
He successfully evaded an assassination attempt from a Dreich Gallere assassin. But that was probably only because the assassin they sent was a bit eccentric. He couldn't say the same for the next assassin that might come their way. Li Jun already has an idea regarding the identity of the person who bought a contract for his head. Since there's really only a handful of people who would benefit from his death. It was really a good thing that he brought the young general to this trip.
Speaking of that general, Li Jun glanced at the man sitting in front of him inside the carriage. Lei Feng still has that listless look on his face. Ever since he came back from wherever he went to yesterday, he started to look pretty absent-minded. It's like his head was on the clouds. No one could even speak properly to him. No matter what Li Jun said to the general, Lei Feng would only answer with a 'hmm'. It's really starting to get on his nerves.
If he continued to be like this, what would happen if another assassin did attack them?
Li Jun shook his head. Since yesterday, everytime he looked at Lei Feng, it felt like he was looking at an abandoned puppy. It might not show on the general's face, but that was just the kind of atmosphere surrounding him right now. Li Jun would never really have thought that there would come a time when he would see the outstanding general like this. It was almost as if Lei Feng received some kind of emotional injury.
Wait- emotional injury? A wild guess suddenly came inside Li Jun's mind. [Don't tell me...]
"Did you go to Hanover manor yesterday?" he asked.
After a day of looking like he had lost his soul, there was finally a wave of emotion in the general's dark eyes. His reaction only confirmed Li Jun's guessed.
Li Jun stared at the general in amazement. Did this guy go to the duke's place and confessed to him? How brazen! Li Jun never thought that the general would be so bold as to confess his feelings to the duke. And based on his emotional state right now, it was obvious that it didn't go well. He was definitely rejected.
"Are you perhaps heartbroken right now?"
Zhang Lei Feng was startled by the prince's question. Heartbroken? Yes, his heart definitely felt like it has been cut into two. He was not even sure why he felt like that. But it was no doubt related to the conversation he had with Argent yesterday morning.
When she said that the two of them has nothing to do with each other, it felt like his chest had been trampled by an elephant. He couldn't even describe how much it hurt. He just knew it did. But what did he expect, really? That once they met again, everything would just magically fall into place? That she would immediately recognized him? He should have known when he found no recognition in her gaze that something like that would never happen.
Even during that explosion, she didn't manage to recognize him.
It was different for him. It only took one second for him to recognize who the genius they were supposed to apprehend that night really was. She was Xia Yin. His Xia Yin. But he was a second too late. Because she chose to end her life. He didn't even have the chance to protect her. Again. Just like all those years they were separated.
But they were given a new life in this world. And once again, he immediately recognized her. Even with a completely different face, he just knew it was her. The excitement he felt when he saw that interview was unlike anything he had ever felt before. Because he only felt truly alive at that moment. It's like he was once again given a reason to live. As if he found the meaning of his existence.
Lei Feng thought that once they met, he could finally fulfill his promise to her. That he could just stay by her side and protect her. But his expectation was truly different from reality. What happened yesterday proved that. It's like a bucket of cold water was poured down on him. Making him face the reality he never expected.
What they have now was a completely different life. She was no longer that genius who was forced into a corner by the government nor that child crying for someone to help her. She was now Argent Blackbourne. An aristocratic duke and the founder of one of the richest company in the world. She now has a family whom she loved, something that she always wanted.
She might be a NoGift but just as she showed to him yesterday, she could definitely protect herself. Lei Feng could tell by the way she moved and the way she handled that wooden sword that she underwent a very harsh training. Probably even taught by a very strong swordsman. Because that was not something anyone could just do by just practicing swinging their swords every morning. With a sword in hand, she could probably take down most men.
Was there even really a need for him then?
No. She didn't need him. Maybe then. But definitely not now. And that's why he felt like this. Because he had to face the truth that there was no longer a place for him in her life. Staying by her side was just a fanciful dream he had. And if he forcefully inserted himself into her life right now, it would just backfire. She might even end up hating him. Something that he never wished to happen.
But does that mean he has to give up?
Lei Feng clenched both his fists. No. He couldn't even if he wanted to. But he wouldn't act as a protector any longer. He would act like a comrade who would fight side-by-side with her. Acting otherwise was equivalent to him not recognizing all the hard work she put into her training. And he didn't want to give her that kind of disservice.
Argent was no damsel-in-distress. She was a warrior. Just like him. She deserved that kind of respect and recognition.
Lei Feng looked outside the carriage's window. "Yes, maybe I am heartbroken," he answered the prince's previous question.
Heartbroken because the girl he once knew was probably long been gone. And he could only blame himself for that.
Li Jun stared at the general's melancholic face and felt sympathy for him. Seeing him like this only ironed out Li Jun's former decision. Yes. Once they were back at Xing, he would definitely send a beautiful male courtesan to Lei Feng's bed. One night with a professional would certainly make him forget about the duke.
With that decision in mind, his mood lifted up. They really needed to go back to Xing as soon as possible.