No, How Can an Atheist Become a Saintess!?

No, How Can an Atheist Become a Saintess!? – 50

EP.50

Chapter 5

Belief and Reality (2)

While Ria was changing her clothes, I continued sorting through my thoughts.

Of course, separate from the storyline, my refusal to become the Saintess stemmed from my convictions. It was a matter of pride. Not something more important than someone’s life, but once I’d taken a stance, it wasn’t something I could easily back down from.

…It was embarrassing to admit, but maybe this was similar to how religious people refuse to bend their beliefs. Other atheists would probably pull their hair out if they heard me say that.

I genuinely believed that the childhood friend should become the heroine. I didn’t want my existence to drive a wedge between them. Whether novels and reality were different or not didn’t matter—I just wanted Lee Si-yoon and Han Yu-ri to end up happy together. I’d felt that even after seeing them in person.

And—

Yes, I believed the Saintess’s role was, in the end, at the center of all conflict.

That power. The divine power I wielded, said to represent God’s strength. It didn’t really matter how this world’s atheists felt. Just like flat-Earthers in reality couldn’t overturn mainstream science, atheists here couldn’t overturn the widely accepted premise of “God exists.”

What mattered were the entities beyond the gates.

They believed in God too, but their interpretation of God differed entirely from this world’s doctrines.

…This was why, even though I knew of that entity, I couldn’t bring myself to believe it was God.

Click.

The sound of the shower door opening brought me out of my thoughts. Ria stepped out, her hair still damp. Though she’d dried herself and put on her nun’s habit, it didn’t fully conceal her allure.

In fact, without her veil, the effect of the habit seemed to work in reverse.

“…Hm?”

As she walked out, towel in hand, Ria noticed me staring and blinked.

“What?”

“Nothing, really.”

In the original story, Ria had been the Saintess’s escort knight. The Saintess, always finding excuses to “volunteer,” would visit Lee Si-yoon, and Ria, following the Saintess, naturally spent time with him too.

Though she wasn’t called Ria in the novel. That name was a modification of Lee Chae-eun’s baptismal name, which I’d come up with on my own.

…The Ria in this world, however, hadn’t yet tried to get close to Lee Si-yoon. Since I was the only deviation from the original story, it was likely my influence.

“Hmm?”

As I turned my gaze toward the window, Ria suddenly strode over to me and grabbed my cheeks with both hands.

“Pffbt!?”

A strange, half-formed noise escaped my mouth instead of a proper protest.

Ria’s strength was impressive. Likely bolstered by some “fantasy-like” adjustment, she was far stronger than any athletic girl her age in the real world.

Lifting my face gently, she ensured I couldn’t avoid her gaze.

“What is it now? What are you worrying about?”

“Nothing, really.”

“Doesn’t look like ‘nothing’ to me.”

“……”

It was awkward, meeting Ria’s gaze while her damp hair clung to her cheeks. Even though a towel draped over her head, it didn’t obscure her red hair beneath. Instead, it made it stand out all the more vividly.

Ugh, vividly. I held back a sigh.

What was I, some hormonal teenager? Acting like a girl’s hair was overwhelming or something.

I darted my eyes around before responding.

“…I was just thinking about today’s battle.”

“Ah.”

Ria released my cheeks.

“Don’t overthink it. We don’t feel endlessly guilty about eating meat, do we? It’s part of nature’s cycle. If we don’t stop them, they’ll attack us instead.”

She spoke while pressing the towel into her hair to wring out the remaining moisture.

“If you put it that way, then all carnivores would be considered terribly inferior beings.”

“That’s true, but still.”

I let out a light sigh.

Though my real concern wasn’t quite about that.

If humanity had never crossed through the gates, none of this would have happened—but saying that ignores the undeniable impact gates have had on human life.

I, too, am human.

And most people want to survive, preferably as comfortably as possible. Controlling the gates and extracting the best benefits from beyond them isn’t all that different from what human civilization has always done on Earth.

“……”

To feel guilty after experiencing the frontlines myself… That might be the pinnacle of hypocrisy. I could kill mosquitoes without a second thought, yet watching a larger monster die made me feel this way.

I flopped onto the bed with a huff.

“What about your schedule? Should I inform the Mother Superior?” Ria asked.

“Can I skip?”

“Well, you’re a Saintess candidate now. It’s weirder that you’ve been doing the same duties as the other nuns for this long.”

I closed my eyes for a moment, letting out a deep breath, then sat up.

“Are you okay after using your holy power?”

“…I didn’t collapse, so I’m fine.”

Nodding, I stood and left the room.

*

The original story wasn’t set in an academy, but perhaps the author wanted to give it a hint of that atmosphere. Within the Association, there were classes to attend.

Technically, it was more like training for newcomers than formal schooling, but sitting in a classroom-like setting gave it a similar feel.

It wasn’t bad, attending classes and opening textbooks again after so long. In fact, it was better than doing nothing.

The people in the Association were all kind as well.

Yet, as the atmosphere began to align more closely with the original story, an unexplainable sense of unease crept in. But what could I do?

Between those classes, we were also assigned light missions as part of practical training, venturing into gates.

These missions involved gates under the management of Horizon, the Hunter Association. They were thoroughly scouted, with secure bases established and the surroundings carefully protected by other hunters.

“Hmm.”

After two more deployments, during the third mission, Mr. Kim Hyeon-kang fell into thought.

“Is something wrong?”

Ria asked.

He deliberated for a moment longer before responding.

“Well, it seems like some previously unrecorded monsters have been appearing.”

“Unrecorded?”

The environments beyond the gates are, for the most part, not drastically different from Earth’s. Whether that similarity is necessary for a gate to form or is due to someone’s deliberate design, no one knows—not even in the original story.

As such, it’s generally assumed that the regions beyond the gates are comparable in size to Earth.

So, it’s not strange for new entities to emerge.

“The mages say they’re not particularly dangerous… but still, I’m hesitant to send you all in this time.”

“……”

“While magical energy levels can provide some insight—”

“If it’s about that, could I handle it instead?”

The one who stepped forward was Gloria.

“I was a capable mage where I lived, even helping my father repel hordes of monsters several times.”

“Hmm…”

Her suggestion seemed to make Mr. Kim Hyeon-kang’s expression grow more complicated.

There was no doubt Gloria was a skilled mage. She had already proven her abilities during our time together, offering valuable advice regarding magic within the Association.

The problem was that Gloria was a princess. And Mr. Kim Hyeon-kang was well aware of that fact.

By Gloria’s logic, she could likely handle whatever monsters appeared—but the risk of placing her on the frontlines wasn’t something he could take lightly.

“…Alright. It’s also important to learn how to face new monsters. Whether to develop strategies for dealing with them or to know when to retreat.”

If the opponent were a living being, he wouldn’t have given such an answer. It’s hard to gauge the strength of a creature that doesn’t possess magic.

Even with monsters, it wasn’t always possible to fully assess the danger beforehand. But for hunters, confronting such risks was an essential part of their reality.

“……”

Judging by the glances directed at Gloria and me, the main concern seemed to be the two of us—people with significant statuses—in such a precarious situation.

“I’m sorry.”

I spoke, lowering my head.

“No, no! That’s not what I meant at all! Please, raise your head!”

Mr. Kim Hyeon-kang waved his hands in alarm.

“But—”

“Truly, it’s nothing like that. I was just momentarily debating the best positioning. You all still need to see the monster, after all.”

Ah.

So that’s what it was.

He was balancing the need for us to observe the new monster with the necessity of keeping a safe distance. This was a rare opportunity—one that might not come again—to witness a unique entity firsthand.

A new monster that’s not too strong, one we can approach reasonably. Thinking about it that way, I started to get a sense of what he meant.

“Alright then, let’s proceed more cautiously this time.”

Mr. Kim Hyeon-kang said.

“This time, I’ll need you to follow instructions carefully instead of moving about freely.”

Seeing his serious expression, we nodded with a bit more tension than usual.