Nirvana In Fire

”My father’s name?” After Mei Changsu got over his surprise, he immediately understood the purpose behind his question, and his expression changed.

“Since your esteemed father was my mother’s benefactor, I should also know his name, shouldn’t I?”

“In that case, Your Highness…..why don’t you ask the imperial consort niang niang?”

“I’ve already asked her”. Prince Jing did nothing to hide this fact. “I’m now asking you Sir.”

Mei Changsu slowly lowered his head. He clenched the hand beneath the quilt tightly into a fist before slowly releasing it, his complexion pale as if it was translucent.

“Is there any difficulty in answering the question Sir?” Prince Jing bent forward, trying to see his eyes clearly. “Is your esteemed father’s name also a secret?”

“How could it be?” Mei Changsu laughed weakly, finally raising both his eyes. “My father’s name, the first character was Shi, the second character Nan.”

Prince Jing’s body shook, his face almost as pale as Mei Changsu’s. It took tremendous effort for him to hold himself in check. “Can you….say it again?”

“My father, Mei Shinan….”

“Which Shi, and which Nan?” Prince Jing squeezed this question through clenched teeth, as if making a final attempt to hold himself in check.

“Shi from shi tou** and Nan from nan shu**.” Mei Changsu observed Prince Jing’s facial expression and knew that he had made the right gamble this time. However, he didn’t feel the least bit at ease in his heart. On the contrary, it was heavy, as if something heavy was pressing down on his chest, causing a dull pain.

*stone / rock

**Chinese cedar

Prince Jing swayed slightly, then staggered two steps back, closing his eyes heavily. For him, after going through the confusing events of the night before, the thought that had flashed through his mind was so sudden, so bizarre that he wondered if he hadn’t gone mad. But the cold and succinct words spoken to him just now. Turned out that he was well and truly mad.

So mad that he would seek the soul of that person who would never return, so mad that he put two completely different persons together, thinking they were the same.

But in the end, it was just a disappointment that was as cold as snow.

Lie Zhanying, who was standing timidly at the doorway withdrew a little, somewhat fearful of the atmosphere in the room, but the news he had in hand was important and had to be reported immediately.

“Your Highness….Commander Meng’s messenger has arrived from the capital….”

Prince Jing stood silent and still for a moment, as if trying to control the hot and cold emotions that were waging war within him. When he had finally taken control of himself, he turned around and walked out without a word, but because his emotions were in such turmoil, he didn’t notice as Foya slinked past him, his tail wagging as he threw himself into Mei Changsu’s arms.

Meng Zhi’s messenger stood silently at the courtyard entrance looking travel-worn. As soon as he saw Prince Jing, he immediately fell to his knees and raised the document case he was holding out to him. Taking it, Prince Jing briefly inspected the seal then said, “Follow me in.”

“Yes!”

As soon as he heard that news had arrived from the imperial capital, even though he was tired, the Liang Emperor immediately got up and put on his coat to Prince Jing on the couch. The messenger knelt by the door, waiting to answer any questions.

The Liang Emperor spread the letter out to read. “Good! I’m relieved.” The lines on his face slowly relaxed. “Commander Meng acted fast. The imperial guards we left behind are back in his control. The palace defence has also been reorganized, so we can return to the capital anytime…..Eh!”

“What’s wrong?”

“….Xia Jiang has escaped from prison…..”

Prince Jing’s eyebrows leapt up. “How did that happen?”

“It happened during the chaos of Commander Meng’s confrontation with Prince Yu after returning to the capital. An apology from the Ministry of Justice for losing the prisoner was included in the letter.” The Liang Emperor’s expression turned very gloomy. “This traitor has disappointed me. Forgiving him would be more difficult than forgiving Prince Yu. Immediately issue a warrant for arrest. He must be captured, dead or alive!”

“Yes.”

“You’ll have to work hard again. Make the arrangements today. We return tomorrow.”

Prince Jing knew that the Liang Emperor was eager to return to the capital so he said, “Father Emperor, please rest assured. Your son will immediately make arrangements to ensure we depart tomorrow.”

“Good, good.” The Liang Emperor smiled at him with affection, “Since we’re returning to the capital soon, find some time to think about what reward you would most like to have.”

Prince Jing said impassively, “There’s no need to think too much about it. Father Emperor will reward your son as you wish. If your son thinks too much, that would be overstepping his duty.”

The Liang Emperor looked intensely at him, then lifted his head and laughed out loud, looking very happy. “I like your undemanding nature. It’s just like your mother. Hurry along then. There’s no need for you to come in again to pay your respects.”

After Prince Jing kowtowed and took his leave, the Liang Emperor leaned against the side of the couch, contemplated a while, then said, “Summon Prince Ji.”

Gao Zhan quickly went to deliver the order. As this place was not like the palace in the imperial capital, Prince Ji very quickly arrived and made his salutations before the couch.

“Sit down. There’s something I would like to discuss with you.” The Liang Emperor pointed at the low chair next to him. “Did you know that Prince Yu initiated this rebellion?”

“This younger brother knows. Xu Anmo has already confessed. Besides, other than Prince Yu, the rest of the princes are here with the royal party. The capital….has also once always been partial to Prince Yu….”

“Jinghuan has bitterly disappointed me. I once had such hopes for him, all in vain. But what about him? He had no strategy, no resolve, and made a mess of things. As far as the rebellion goes, I can no longer put up with it.” The Liang Emperor’s expression was full of bitterness, and his fingers massaged his forehead as if he was feeling unwell. “But ultimately, he is still my son. No matter how I think about it, my heart still aches….”

Prince Ji hurriedly soothed him, “Huang xiong, things have already reached this point. It’s better to take care of the dragon body first…..”

“Let’s not talk about this.” The Liang Emperor sat up and looked at his younger brother. “Now that the Crown Prince has been deposed and Prince Yu is guilty of an unpardonable crime, who do you think should be the future heir apparent?”

This greatly startled Prince Ji and he bent forward saying, “This decision belongs to Your Majesty alone. This brother dare not comment.”

“I’m just asking within the family. Must you be so nervous?” The Liang Emperor extended his arm to pull him up. “What do you think of Prince Jing?”

Prince Ji considered a moment and slowly replied, “Prince Jing….His strengths lie in his benevolence and filial piety. He’s sincere, loyal and brave. He can be….a role model for all princes….”

The Liang Emperor looked out the window with intensity. After a long while, he heaved a great sigh as if from deep within his chest. “Actually, Prince Jing is not my most outstanding son….don’t you think so?”

Prince Ji was trembling with fear and trepidation, and dared not even breath.

“However, Jingyan has Jingyan’s own strengths. He knows how to exercise restraint. On this point, he is different from….from Jingyu. Perhaps it has something to do with his mother’s nature.” The Liang Emperor didn’t really seem to expect a response from Prince Ji, his gaze remaining fixed where it was. “When Prince Jing hurried back to rescue the royal party, the imperial guards were already greatly weakened. The hunting palace was actually already in the palm of hands, but he just returned the military seal without a word. At that time, that took me by surprise….”

“Surprise?”

“I thought he would ask for something, or at least hint at something.”

Prince Ji smiled reluctantly. “Jingyan doesn’t seem to be that kind of person.”

“After we return to the capital, I will reclaim full control of all matters, but when I mentioned this to Jingyan just now, he seemed to have no intention whatsoever of delaying the return.” The Liang Emperor moved closer to Prince Ji. Lowering his voice, he said, “Tell me, do you think he has ambitions for the Eastern Palace?”

Prince Ji was a little taken aback and smiled awkwardly. “Not just Jingyan. Any royal prince who says he doesn’t have ambitions for the Eastern Palace would be lying.”

“Oh?” The Liang Emperor glanced at him. “You’re also a royal prince. Do you have such ambitions?”

This time, Prince Ji smiled easily. “This brother is not a royal prince. This brother is a royal younger brother. That’s different.”

The Liang Emperor chuckled, enthusiastically patting his younger brother’s shoulders. “You, you were born a little too late. But because of you, I have someone to talk things over with. Now wipe away your sweat and have some snacks. Why are you so nervous? Don’t I love or indulge you enough?”

Prince Ji chuckled along, then picking up a piece of pastry from the plate, he put it in his mouth and after chewing twice, he said praisingly, “This is the handiwork of the imperial consort niang niang right? Huang xiong hasn’t been willing to give this to this brother so I have to come here to eat it.”

“Alright alright, pack it up and bring it back if you like. The imperial consort is still with me so I don’t have to worry about not being able to eat (of her cooking).” The Liang Emperor smiled from ear to ear, but he signaled Gao Zhan with his eyes, saying, “Summon Prince Huai and Prince Xu.”

Prince Ji looked up distractedly and said, “Then this brother will first.….”

“There’s no need for you to rush. Continue eating.” The smile on the Liang Emperor’s face gradually subsided, and became solemn. “Didn’t you say that all royal princes have ambition? I would like to hear what they think.”

Prince Ji almost choked, and he hurriedly swallowed a mouthful of tea.

It wasn’t long before Prince Huai and Prince Xu entered. When they had paid their respects, the Liang Emperor smiled as he invited them to help themselves to the snacks, but before they could swallow them, he suddenly asked, “If Prince Jing becomes the Crown Prince, does any of you have objections?”

Prince Ji immediately passed the pitiful princes each a cup of tea. After choking and coughing for a while, they both knelt prostrate, not daring to say much.

“Why? Do you have objections?”

“Your sons dare not…..” Prince Xu was a little bolder. He composed himself and said, “There’s nothing to say against Prince Jing. If Father Emperor thinks he is suitable, your sons will think he is suitable.”

“There’s no need to mention the Crown Prince and Prince Yu. If Prince Jing doesn’t become the crown prince, I would have to choose between the both of you….” The Liang Emperor looked intensely at both his sons. “Do the both of you harbour such ambitions?”

“Your son….is incompetent and asks only to be able to perform his filial duty before Father Emperor, nothing else.” Prince Xu kowtowed after his profession, and Prince Huai quickly followed along.

“But….” The Liang Emperor drew out his words, “You’re both older and should rank ahead of Prince Jing, right?”

Prince Xu choked. He quickly tugged at the scholarly Prince Huai who then stammered, “Your sons….are not the sons of the first wife. We are also not that different in age. So, Father Emperor…..choose impartially based on ability and virtue….”

“That’s a good one, to choose based on ability and virtue.” The Liang Emperor smiled mildly. “If one considers filial piety, Prince Jing is fully deserving. I am relieved that the both of you have such an open mind. Come, get up. I called you here to have some snacks and thought I’d ask by the way. Come, eat, eat. I’m also tired. Once you have finished eating, go in and pay your respects to the imperial consort.”

They two princes clearly understood why they had been ordered to pay respects to the imperial consort. But although Prince Huai and Prince Xu had never involved themselves in court politics, they had not lost the ability to judge a situation and had long since anticipated this day so they weren’t surprised. So they hurriedly had a few snacks, bowed to the Liang Emperor who had fallen asleep, then entered the inner room as ordered.

Prince Ji quietly withdrew and sent men to prepare his horse, intending to leave the palace to relax. Just as he walked through the door, he spotted Prince Jing walking by with a group of civil and military officials in the distance, probably making arrangements for the royal party to return. Observing his steady and confident manner, he could see the dignity of a ruler.

“It looks like the country is finally his…..” mumbled Prince Ji to himself. Suddenly, he remembered the one with the heroic bearing who rose high, the eldest son who commanded the people’s support, and he couldn’t stop the complex feelings surging in his heart, unable to define exactly what they were.

“Greetings Prince Ji….” A voice suddenly sounded from behind, startling him. He turned around.

Standing before him was a scholar dressed in a green jacket and white fur coat, a thin figure with a sickly look. At one glance, he looked frail and harmless, but in all the world, he was the one person nobody dared underestimate.

“That’s right. The Qilin talent is also his…..” said Prince Ji to himself as his heart palpitated. He had never had any direct contact with Mei Changsu, but he recognized him. There wasn’t anyone of any standing in the capital today who didn’t recognize this Mister Su.

“Is Royal Uncle heading out?”

“Yes. Is Mister Su feeling unwell?”

“Thank you for asking. After sleeping for a day, I just wanted to get up and walk a little. I heard we’re returning to the capital tomorrow?”

“That’s right. Once we’re back in the imperial capital, everything will be decided. Sir can also be more at ease.” The royal uncle smiled faintly.

Mei Changsu smiled too, his eyes soft. “Actually, His Highness Prince Jing has been meaning to say thank you to Your Highness. It’s just that with one thing after another, it hasn’t been too convenient.”

“Thank me for what?” Prince Ji laughed as he said, “I’ve always looked at the heart, not the person. Why thank me?”

Mei Changsu looked at him for a long while, then slowly bowed down. “His Highness wants to thank Royal Uncle for rescuing Ting Sheng. If it wasn’t for Royal Uncle’s compassion back then, he wouldn’t have existed in this world….”

Prince Ji’s body trembled all over, his smile gradually fading, as if there was something bubbling within that threatened to spill out, causing lines of sorrow and grief to ripple on his forehead.

“Even more so, this is not something to thank me for…..He’s family. Aren’t we all each other’s flesh and blood?”

With these words, this prince who had lived an easy and leisurely life turned around, his sleeves fluttering in the mountain wind, his sad and bowed back retreating into the distance.

Afterthought:

Foya has no loyalty! He chose MCS over XJY ha! To me that’s testament to how expressive MCS was when he was Lin Shu, whereas XJY was probably a lot more reserved, overthinking things, keeping his emotions in check even though he’s such an emotional creature, etc. I really empathize with him, though, because that’s also very much me!!