Natasha the Halve

24^th day of the fourth month. Fifth week of summer. 1980 Yiama’s Era. Lumin Kingdom.

I woke up at 5 in the morning, showered, woke Yolin up, and went out. I was on a quest to visit the Elf that had recently joined us. I reached her place pretty quickly.

I greeted the Tigea couple that ran the inn when I got there, then went into the building and knocked on Pokora's door, where I waited for a bit.

I heard footsteps and the door opened.

The Elf was wearing underwear, and her hair was a mess.

“Who?” she asked with her eyes closed.

“Guess,” I chuckled.

She cracked open an eye and glared at me with her dull silver irises, “Why so early? Did something happen?”

“Wear some clothes first, harlot,” I teased her, gesturing at her half nakedness.

She sighed, “It's been almost fifty years since I last heard someone tell another person how to dress, not even talking about treating women as harlots. Or what? Your weewee will get hard?”

I raised my eyebrows, “Get some proper meat in those bones, and maybe.”

She laughed at that, “Ah, body shaming. A classic!” she stepped aside and gestured for me to come in.

I walked into her apartment while laughing and turned to her.

“What brings you to my humble abode, oh powerful Halve?” she joked.

I smiled, “You have committed crimes against Galeia and her people. What say you in your defense?”

She bit her lips and shook her head, “I'd rather die than go to prison!”

I scoffed, “Galeia has no use for your kind!”

We burst in laughter, and she rubbed her eyes.

“Such an old joke!” she managed to say between gasps.

“Still gold,” I pointed out.

She nodded, and walked into her place.

I followed her to the kitchen, and sat down on a stool.

She walked to a refrigerator and got a milk bottle. Then to a shelf and took a black box.

“Do you drink coffee?” she asked as she faced the sink.

“I don't, too bitter,” I shook my head.

“It's way more bitter here,” she commented as she produced a kettle and filled it with water from the faucet. “Pure coffee, none of that non-caffeinated shit.”

“Decaffeinated,” I corrected her. “I'm not hungry, thank you.”

She put the kettle on the fire and turned to me, “So, what brings you here? It's...” she checked a clock on the kitchen wall and sighed. “A quarter past five. Shit, you're a psychopath.”

I shrugged, “I don't actually need sleep. I came to ask you to show me what you use for combat.”

She stared at me for a few seconds, “Why?”

“I want to give you good gear. You know,” I shrugged, “make sure you don't die, all that.”

“Right,” she chuckled. “You Halves are born with equipment and all that.”

I nodded.

A dark leather set covered her body.

Standing up, I circled her to get a proper view of the affront to protection.

It covered almost nothing. It had cleavage, even when considering her modest chest. Her navel, armpits, thighs, and back were visible. The leather looked flimsy and old.

“This is shit,” I blurted out.

“It's medium quality,” she argued. “I bought it for a gold piece back home, some twenty years ago. True, I could've taken better care of it, but it's comfortable and does its job.”

“Its job? Of what? Offering targets?” I poked her chest, above her left breast. “You're telling shit where to aim.”

“I assume you have better stuff?” she arched an eyebrow.

“Of course I do,” I smiled and wriggled my eyebrows. “Legendary quality.”

Her eyes widened, “Huh? That exists?”

I pulled out the spandex-like leather set for my Archer class from my storage, and offered it to her, “Check for yourself.”

She took the items and frowned, “Are you expecting me to survive against Giants?”

“Pretty much, and that's not all,” next, I pulled six rings from my storage, and gave them to her.

She was silent as she appraised them.

What's so shocking? I wondered, pulling out one of my own rings and appraising it.

[Golden Band of Eternal Protection (Legendary)]
(Durability SS)(Pool Recovery Factor SS)
(Minor Healing Factor SS)(Minor Stamina Recovery Factor SS)
-Toughness + 10%
-STR + 50
-CON + 50
-DEX + 50

Pretty shit, stat-wise, I concluded. Barely one percent of my strength.

“Anyway,” I moved on, storing the ring.

I pulled out a Unique bow. It looked like a standard composite bow. The body was a reddish brown wood, and the string was a matte black cord of metal.

[+100 Trueshot Bow (Unique) {Ascension Lvl 10}]
(Elastic Energy to Kinetic Energy SS+) (Durability S+)
-Elastic Energy to Kinetic Energy +100% ({Lvl 10 Quartz} x10)
-Draw Weight reduced by 10% (Enchantment) (Does not affect final Kinetic Energy)
-DEX + 200
-STR + 150
-CON + 100

I handed it to the Elf and got a sigh in return.

“No Legendary weapon?” she voiced her disappointment.

I shook my head.

“Do your girlfriends have Unique weapons, too?” her eyes inspected my face.

“No, I gave them Mythical quality weapons,” I crossed my arms. “Because they're my girlfriends. I had no tank weapons, however, so Yolin got Legendary fists.”

“MYTHICAL?!” her eyes opened to the limit. Then, she looked at me in shock. “ Wait... you're walling better weapons behind being in a relationship with you?”

“I don't think I have to explain myself in that regard,” I pointed out. “Besides, Unique quality is plenty good.”

“I mean... don't get me wrong,” she shook her head. “It seems a bit arbitrary. You do you with your items, I guess.”

I nodded, “I will.”

She stored the items with a smile, after all.

I searched my storage for arrows, and sighed after not finding any. Fuck games and their lack of ammunition.

“So, now onto costumes,” I pulled one after the other.

Pokora's eyes widened along with her smile, and I felt my chest tighten with glee at her excitement.

In the end, she chose an Archer costume that was similar to the Elven archers in the movie franchise that was about a short man bringing a ring to a volcano.

After that I reminded her about the appointment we had later, then left as she made herself a cup of coffee.

---

We joined the Watchers a few hours later in the northwest gate of Lakeview and set off. Their caravan was quite humble, consisting of three carts that were pulled by Tateli, the ostrich-looking animal. Six Watchers drove the coaches, two on each to switch every eight hours. The other four rode Bhin around the vehicles, and Ranulf, the man Lorena mentioned, rode an Untu, the large orange cats.

My group mounted an animal each. We all wore our combat gear.

Thick clouds covered the suns casting a nice shade on us.

I looked up, hoping for some rain. I always liked rain, but hadn't had that many chances to enjoy it in the last decade back on Earth.

Bromisnar next to me gasped then clapped once, “I look flat, but I am deep. Hidden realms I shelter. Lives I take, but food I offer. At times I am beautiful. I can be calm, angry and turbulent. I have no heart, but offer pleasure as well as death. Nobody can own me, yet I encompass what everybody must have.”

“Hmmm...” I rubbed my chin, giving it a thought.

After leaving Lakeview we started a game with riddles since it was easy to play and everybody could join. We had a score going and Bromisnar was in the lead with five points. Next was me with three points, then Alyssa with two, and the rest had a point each.

Escorting the caravan was abysmally more boring than I initially expected.

“Oh, fuck off!” Bonte complained from behind us. “Always with the hardest ones.”

I noticed Ranulf nodding to himself. He had chosen not to join, and instead rode his mount a bit farther ahead from our group.

Flat, but deep. Kills and feeds. Angry and calm. No owner, but great provider, I thought, looking around.

The road was pretty wide, around thirty meters from edge to edge. The road itself was a dirt road that cut through the seemingly endless forest so tall trees lined it on both sides.

Well... it's the ocean, I concluded.

“Got it,” I raised a hand.

The rest groaned, and I heard Pokora click her tongue. The Satyr gave me an expectant look.

I gave him a nod, “The ocean.”

The man smiled, “Correct.”

It was my turn to tell a riddle. I chose one I liked, “Only one color, but not one size. Stuck at the bottom, yet easily flies. Present in suns, but not in rain. Doing no harm, and feeling no pain,” I turned to Bromisnar and gave him a shit eating grin.

The man knew way too many riddles, and sometimes gave an instant answer to the ones I knew. His eyebrows knitted and a frown replaced his light smile. Then, he looked ahead and squinted.

I chuckled.

“How about you fuck off, Natasha?” Pokora let out an irritated sigh. “You too, Bromisnar. Always the hardest with you two. If not for Alyssa guessing a few we'd be stuck with your impossible riddles.”

“Oh?” I turned to her with a cocky smirk. “You fumin', darling?”

She scowled at me. Her body moving up and down with the movement of her mount made it even funnier.

Lapia gasped, “Got it!”

We all turned to her, waiting for her answer.

“Water...?” the Elf blushed a little. “Wait, no. It's not in rain. Fuck!”

Bonte clapped once, “Yeah. Got it.”

Bromisar groaned, “Obviously.”

“Shadows,” the Tigea snickered.

I nodded, “Correct.”

Alyssa let out an exasperated sigh, “I was so close!”

She raised a fist and made an angry face at it.

“Better luck next time,” Yolin laughed from the front.

We continued the riddle game for a few hours. The suns reached the zenith behind the clouds, and we stopped at the side of the road when it was time for lunch. I was admittedly not hungry at all, but flesh beings require their sustenance.

Ranulf went ahead and shared a few words with a couple of Watchers.

My companions dismounted and I copied them, keeping an eye out on the road and glancing at the Watchers from time to time.

One of them, a female Lupum, nodded with too much enthusiasm after whatever the man said. She dismounted and walked to the edge of the forest, then took a peek in my direction. After noticing I was watching, she nodded to herself and waved her hands. I noticed a short mace in her right hand that emanated a faint green light.

The trees were pushed aside, almost as if they had come to life by themselves. The roots moved like worms under the ground and the trunks closed into each other forming a small clearing big enough to fit everyone.

I watched with wide eyes.

That's fucking useful around here, isn't it?! I was shocked, and my stupidity showed, because I didn't appraise her.

A hand closed my hanging jaw.

I looked at the owner and noticed Pokora giving me a 'Get your shit together' look.

I shrugged in response. The display of magic was cool.

Three Watchers made camp in five minutes, setting a large pot in the middle of the clearing and some stools around the space.

In the meantime, the Watchers driving the carts guided the vehicles so that the backs faced the clearing.

Ranulf approached one of the carts and removed a cloth on the back revealing people inside.

“Out! Lunch!” he barked.

Sussanna and a few others came out, their hands tied with rope.

Another set of Watchers guided them to the stools and sat them down. Then, appropriately, watched over them.

Elena came out of another cart, no ropes binding her hands. She looked around for a few seconds, confusion and apprehension clear on her face. Until her eyes met mine. She smiled and walked over to me.

Fucking hell.

“Your Excellency,” she reached me and curtsied.

“Elena,” I gave a nod back. Then gestured to the people next to Sussanna, “What's with them? What did they do?”

“The Elmari Elf,” she pointed at a man behind the Lupum, “Is one of the managers of the Sharp Paw. I heard from the Watchers that he violated labor laws and had people under level 100 working during the Aphelion.”

I nodded in understanding. Sussanna was level 98 after all.

“Well... that's stupid,” I cringed.

“Committing a crime is always stupid,” a Watcher near us muttered, then added with a respectful nod making his feline ears shift a little, “Your Excellency.”

Is that the slogan? I wondered as I looked around.

I felt a weird feeling inside me and immediately turned to face the north side of the road. Something dangerous was approaching. Worryingly fast at that. My instincts were screaming in joy at the coming challenge. I equipped my helmet, spear, and shield from storage.

“Something's coming,” I warned the Watcher. “Get everyone to safety.”

“HALVE WARNING! DANGER COMING!” he shouted, jogging to the group of Watchers in the clearing.

Everybody went into action immediately.

I focused on the trees in front of me. I felt an almost imperceptible thump from the ground. It resembled footsteps in rhythm.

“What is it?” Lapia's voice behind me sounded a little anxious.

I noticed a slight shift in the ambient E'er and turned to her.

She had her staff floating next to her and all my companions were ready to fight.

I smiled widely behind my helmet, a rumbling in my stomach made me shiver, “No idea, but it's pretty fucking big.”