LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 85
Seo-ha looked at me with eyes that expressed disbelief. It was only today that I realized how much emotion could be contained in a person’s gaze and how others could feel it.
“What, what are you talking about? Uju. I just told you, I’ve never lied to you…”
“December 24th.”
“…Huh?”
Cutting off Seo-ha’s flustered attempt to push me away, I opened the diary and began to read the first phrase on the first page.
“December 24th. Today, I finally met Mr. Cosmo for the first time. When he asked how I ended up here, I tried to smile and disguise my identity, worried that he might feel burdened. The joy on his face when I called myself a fan is still vividly etched in my memory.”
“What are you doing? Stop reading it, it’s embarrassing…”
Swish.
Seo-ha lunged for the diary, but I quickly hid it behind me and laughed.
“It’s written right here. The one who lied from the start wasn’t you, but me, for your sake. If I found out you were part of Changseong Group, I would definitely feel pressured.”
“T-That’s…”
Seo-ha hesitated, as if she had no way to refute. She must have never imagined that the diary she wrote in could defend her words.
Turning the pages one by one toward Seo-ha, I continued speaking.
“I told you earlier, didn’t I? I confessed knowing everything. I know how you felt toward me, why you acted that way, and how much you struggled.”
“…That’s just because you’re kind, Uju. At the very least, for me to be forgiven, you should have revealed all the facts on the day you expressed your feelings.”
Still unable to accept her own actions, Seo-ha bowed her head tightly clutching her fists, making her appear smaller and more vulnerable than I’d ever seen her.
That’s why I didn’t stop speaking.
I thought the only one who could save her now wasn’t Seo-ha herself, but only me.
“Then just say it out loud now. I’ll forgive everything here.”
“Say what…?”
“What lies you told. Of course, I know them all, but maybe there are more you’re hiding.”
I said this with a deliberately mischievous tone and a playful smile to lighten the atmosphere.
Seo-ha seemed flustered for a moment, stammering like she was about to chant a magic spell as she waved her hands.
“Actually, the meat place we went to together… I didn’t go there to work. I heard you were getting a new female editor and got jealous, so I wanted to see who it was.”
“Hmmm… Well, thanks to you, I enjoyed delicious meat that day. So that’s fine, pass.”
“P-Pass?!”
Seo-ha’s eyes widened in shock at my matter-of-fact dismissal, but I maintained a serious expression, signaling for her to keep talking.
“In fact, the editor I introduced you to wasn’t my acquaintance; she was someone from our company.”
“That doesn’t matter. Thanks to that, I got a good employee. Pass.”
“Even this…!?”
Is that all? I grinned, as if to say, “Come on, hit me with more.”
At this point, it seemed like Seo-ha had become determined, pouting her lips in frustration and began to spill out all the lies she told.
“W-Well! When you told me about Nayun’s job at the company, I pretended not to know, but I actually did. I recommended Nayun to the HR manager.”
“Well, that’s a good thing. You helped my friend get a job.”
“H-Huh…?”
Seo-ha reacted as if she couldn’t believe it. It seemed that she was overwhelmed by the lies she had been spilling out and lost control.
This worked in my favor.
“And I lied about investing in stocks too! The clothes you gifted me? I even edited the receipt to show it!”
“Why is that a lie? Seo-ha, you’re a major shareholder of Changseong Corporation. By that logic, you’re technically an investor, right?”
“…Huh?”
“And fixing the receipt was probably because you thought I would feel uncomfortable and reject it, right? Am I wrong?”
“Well, that’s true…”
As I pointed out each of Seo-ha’s claims, it seemed she didn’t have anything left to say. Her voice trailed off as she fiddled with her hands, mumbling with a pinched expression.
“In the end, none of the lies you told were truly for yourself.”
“N-No, it’s all because I was scared…”
Shaking her head, Seo-ha took a step back.
Being scared meant that she might have thought if I knew she was the precious daughter of a conglomerate family, I wouldn’t see her as an ordinary fan or as a woman.
Alright, that one could arguably be considered a lie for her own sake.
But my question was, what’s wrong with that?
“Then, Seo-ha, let me ask you one thing.”
“What is it…?”
“You said before that I felt very different from how I seemed on the broadcast.”
“That is true…”
I remembered her saying that I appeared more lively and energetic on air, while in reality, I was calm and quiet.
“You know, it’s because I’ve had experiences that made it hard for me to show my true self on broadcasts. If we’re being honest, I had to pretend to be happy.”
“…”
Seo-ha didn’t seem to deny it, and realizing what my next point was, she bit her lip.
“Then, am I a liar too? In essence, I deceived you and the viewers as well.”
“Ah, no! That’s…”
“What’s that?”
As I echoed her words like I was fishing for a reaction, Seo-ha couldn’t speak anymore and lowered her head.
She probably understood what I was aiming for.
If she refuted my point by saying it was natural for people to fear revealing their true selves, she would be justifying all her previous lies.
On the other hand, if she agreed, she would be admitting that both of us were liars. But given her personality, she would never say that.
In other words, I was essentially holding her identity hostage, threatening her to forgive herself or risk branding myself a liar too.
Although my coercive approach contrasted sharply with the heartfelt confession, I thought it was the only medicine Seo-ha needed right now.
“…I don’t want to.”
“What do you mean, you don’t want to?”
“I don’t mind being a liar myself. But I don’t want to reject you, Uju.”
“Well, we can just acknowledge it, right? You and I both.”
I approached the now-far-off Seo-ha, handing her the diary.
She stared at it blankly before, with clumsy movements like a creaking wooden puppet, took it. Finally looking up, she met my gaze.
“Do you know, Seo-ha?”
“…?”
“Actually, I was really happy reading this diary. I know it sounds foolish to say this knowing how difficult your heart must have been, but it just made me want to smile for some reason.”
“…Why?”
Right, why? Honestly, at that moment, I didn’t know the answer. I just felt inexplicably amused. Maybe I had been pushed to the edge of shock by a shocking truth.
But looking back now, I think I understand the reason.
“I think it’s because I was finally happy to truly learn about you.”
“About me…?”
“Yeah. The night after our collaboration ended, I found myself thinking, ‘What do I really know about Seo-ha?’ or ‘Was it right to confess in this state?’”
Of course, I could have learned more about her as we dated. At that time, I felt a little confused about whether it was appropriate to express my feelings without knowing her better.
So, when I first saw the diary, maybe I was glad instead.
Finally being able to say that I knew this person well, realizing I could understand so many truths and that my feelings wouldn’t change, brought me strange pride.
“That’s why I’m actually happy. Knowing everything about you, I can finally express my heart.”
After a brief pause, I perhaps for the first time lifted her hand into mine, locking eyes.
If Seo-ha’s cheeks glowed a little brighter under the moonlight, could it just be my imagination?
“…Are you really okay? With someone like me.”
Seo-ha’s voice wavered now. Her words trembled like leaves in the wind.
It was clear she wouldn’t want to reveal her vulnerable side to me, so I deliberately directed my gaze towards the radiant moon rising over the sea.
But the warmth transmitted from our hands still assured me that Seo-ha was truly here with me.
“What do you mean? Where would you find a better woman than you, Seo-ha?”
“…I’m incredibly jealous! I’m the type of narrow-minded woman who can’t stand seeing my boyfriend collaborate with another girl!”
“Doing collaborations with a female streamer doesn’t have to be an issue. It can be balanced out.”
“…I would probably be a hassle. I might come over every morning and bother you right after your broadcasts.”
“Wow, that sounds delightful from morning till night! I might as well skip meals.”
I intentionally responded playfully to her remark, feeling her tears slowly subside. When I finally looked her way again, I noticed she may have wiped her eyes, for there were no traces of tears around her bloodshot eyes. It felt as if she wanted to show me only her most beautiful side.
“Will you accept a woman like this…?”
“Of course, I’m too lucky to have you. Are you sure you’re okay with me being someone like this?”
“Yes, it’s too much, but I want you, Kang Woo-joo.”
“Same here.”
I don’t think I’ve ever longed for something deeply in my life. The last time I recall wanting something was probably as a kid wishing for a game console.
Yet for the first time, I found someone worth all my investment, someone I would give everything for.
That’s this person right in front of me.
“…Uju.”
“Yes, Seo-ha?”
“Will you go out with me?”
“Of course.”
Though she echoed my feelings back as if it were my own confession, I chose not to interrupt her and smiled.
Seo-ha must have wanted to do this all along. By revealing all the truths she had hidden until now, she wanted to ask me to stay by her side.
Although it didn’t occur in the way she might have envisioned, this felt special in its own right.
“Thank you, Uju. And…”
As she gently walked toward me across the sandy shore, the moonlight glimmered, and with the backdrop of the night sea, every step felt brightened by the blooming metaphorical flower of our moment.
Smooch.
A soft sensation brushed against my lips, and by the time I gathered my thoughts, Seo-ha’s face had pulled away.
“I love you. I’m so happy to finally say this.”
As she displayed her tears for the first time, Seo-ha smiled brighter than ever, clutching her hair that danced with the evening breeze.
I was certain that this beautiful and poignant summer night scene was something I could never forget for the rest of my life.