Monster

My day had a strange weight to it, and the more I thought about it, the more I realized why. I’d left the safe house at dawn to run errands for my two new… friends, I guess. But even as I called them that in my head, something felt off. I never truly saw them as just friends, did I? They were always “supernatural creatures” in my mind, something different from me, even though we were more alike than I wanted to admit.

I think… deep down, I kept that distance because I didn’t want to face the truth of what I was. I didn’t actively seek out others like me, not because I couldn't, but because I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to be reminded of the part of myself I kept rejecting. I was clinging to the illusion of normalcy, desperately trying to feel human, to hold onto that fragile sense of identity. So, I stayed close to the Chasses, humans who still treated me as one of their own.

It’s hypocritical, really. Here I am, the monster of monsters, yet I push away anything that would force me to confront that truth. I didn’t even realize it at the time, but I was always rejecting the supernatural world to protect myself. Thinking about killing them more than getting to know any of them. They were all monsters to me… at first glance. It wasn’t just about staying alone; it was about clinging to what little humanity I had left, pretending I wasn’t as far gone as I knew I was. But after the alley… with the stranger… I was admitting things to myself now.

I grabbed a duffle bag from the safe house, and I headed out. I would pack only what would fit inside, nothing more, nothing less. The plan was simple: visit the two vampire hideaways, take what I needed, and be back before sunset. My first stop was Martin’s bar, a place that always seemed to be drenched in shadow, even when the neon signs outside flickered to life. Using the keys Martin had given me, I slipped through the locked front door into the darkened space, where the familiar smell of stale beer and damp wood hung in the air. The silence was thick, save for the soft creak of the floorboards beneath my boots.

I weaved through the maze of empty tables, their chairs flipped upside down for the day, giving me ample room to maneuver in and out of the space. Behind the bar, I navigated past shelves of dusty liquor bottles, the faint clink of glass following me as I made my way toward the back. Through the kitchen, the scent of old grease and burnt food lingered, but I barely noticed, focused on my destination. I reached the thick metal door that separated Martin’s work den from the rest of his establishment. It was a heavy slab, almost industrial, like something meant to keep the world at bay.

Once inside, I found his stash. It wasn’t elaborate or carefully curated like the Chasses’ armories; Martin wasn’t interested in symbols or intricate designs. Spread out before me was an assortment of daggers and short swords, each one different from the last. They were forged in varying shapes, some with straight edges, others curved, but they shared one trait: they were pure steel. Not a trace of silver or any warding like the Chasse weaponry. These weapons were crude, simplistic tools designed for one purpose… brutal efficiency. They weren’t meant to weaken or poison. They were meant to cleave flesh.

I ran my fingers along the hilt of a dagger, feeling the cold metal against my skin. The simplicity of the weapons reflected Martin himself, practical, direct, and no frills. I grabbed a few that felt right in my hand, choosing options that gave me a sense of balance, something the others could trust in the heat of a fight. Nothing too big or long that I couldn’t fit in the duffle. Along with them, I took a change of clothes for the old vampire, stuffing the fabric into the bag before zipping it shut.

As I prepared to leave, I couldn’t help but glance back at the stash, wondering what kind of battles these blades had already seen. What kind of monsters, human or otherwise, they had ended. From the looks of their weathered surfaces, they’d been through carnage; battles… from a time before the Chasse family.

I was in and out of Martin’s fairly quickly, pacing the city sidewalks with a strap of the hefty duffle tossed over a shoulder. I strolled down the daylight streets with the gear in hand, acting like a normal guy doing normal shit. I started making my way to the part of town where I knew Alex lived. Unlike Martin’s, I had never been to the next place before.

Alex’s place was about a ten-minute walk from Martin’s, but it felt longer as I wound my way through the bustling downtown streets. The closer I got, the more the noise picked up; cars weaving through traffic, engines revving, the distant hum of conversations from pedestrians. The area was crowded, not just with people, but with a constant flow of movement, a living pulse that never seemed to slow down. I started to worry. What if it decided now was the time to take over? There were too many people.

The building itself was massive, one of those older apartment complexes with brick facades and balconies overlooking the busy street. It had an almost imposing presence, looming over the chaos below. It looked solid.

There were no keys for this stop, unlike Martin’s. Alex had given me clear directions instead, and I couldn’t help but feel a bit uneasy. The instructions were precise, but there was something about sneaking into an unlocked apartment in broad daylight that left me on edge. As I made my way around to the back of the building, the city noise started to fade, replaced by the quieter sounds of distant traffic and the occasional thrum of a passing car.

I spotted the window Alex had mentioned, the one lined with aluminum foil from the inside, reflecting the bright glow of the sky. It gave the place a makeshift, half-abandoned feel, like someone trying too hard to block out the world. The balcony door to the left of that window was supposed to be unlocked, just as Alex had said. I glanced up at the structure, feeling a strange mix of curiosity and apprehension. I didn’t know much about her, and part of me wondered what I’d find inside. She’d made it clear not to "fuck with anything else" while I was there. It felt more personal than practical like she didn’t want me to see something I wasn’t supposed to.

I stepped beneath the balcony, mentally running through her instructions again, feeling the tension build as I prepared to climb. All I had to do was get what she wanted and get out. Simple, in theory. But the unease lingered, gnawing at me with each step I took. I looked around, ensuring that I wouldn’t be seen.

This would've been easier under the cover of night, but broad daylight added a whole new level of risk. Every second out in the open felt like too many, and I could feel the weight of the city's eyes on me, even if no one was watching. Or at least, I hoped they weren’t. If anyone saw me scaling the side of a building in broad daylight, it’d turn into a mess I didn’t need. The thought gnawed at me, but there was no time to dwell on it.

I moved fast, rushing up the side of the building toward the balcony, heart pounding in my ears. The street below felt like a stage, the kind where one wrong move means the spotlight snaps onto you. My muscles tensed as I pulled myself up, praying that no wandering eyes had caught me. If they had, I’d have a bigger problem than what waited inside.

I landed on the balcony with a soft thud, and without a second thought, slipped through the unlocked door, disappearing into the shadows. Inside, the air felt thick and stagnant, a sharp contrast to the noise outside. The darkness swallowed me whole. Every window was covered, blotted out with layers of material—thick blankets, aluminum foil, anything to block the sunlight.

It wasn’t just dark. It was suffocating, a black void that felt designed to trap anyone who stepped in. This wasn’t just an apartment; it was a hiding place, meticulously crafted for one purpose. Alex had turned this space into a fortress, sealing herself from the light. It was more than just a place to live; it was a tomb, cold and lifeless.

I could feel it, that unnatural stillness that comes with places like this, a place built to harbor something far from human. It would have been perfect for me.

The whole place was surprisingly clean. I’m not sure what I expected honestly, but seeing the place was a surprise. I found her dresser in the bedroom, exactly where she said it’d be. The dresser was another shock. When I opened the drawers, I saw an overflowing wealth of all sorts of lingerie, undergarments, and similar clothing to the type she’d always worn at the bar. Every night I had spent wasting away there, she was behind the bar wearing the skimpiest clothing in the room. This was all a part of her pull. The way she lured in her prey… murderous vampires. I knew what I’d see since she requested something with a little more “breathing room,” but it was slightly awkward going through her underwear drawer. Especially since I would have to bring all this back and hand it to her like a good little errand boy. She’d know everything I had to sort through. Nevertheless, I scooped up a bunch of random stuff and shoved it in the duffle bag.

As I stuffed what looked like a red bra into the duffle, I saw a very small and older-looking picture frame sitting on a bedside table. It sat directly beneath the lamp, facing the bed where I knew she had to lay. Her impression was faintly visible on only one side of the thin, sheet-covered mattress. I stepped over to the bed, sitting in her place, and examined the photo even closer. The picture was of a couple, taken a very long time ago. Maybe even before I was born. The girl was obviously Alex, but from when she was still human. Her hair was much less potent, a more natural red. She was smiling as her hands wrapped around the arm of a man who looked close in age to her. The time was different, the clothes were styles from an age past. If I had to guess it was probably in the late 1970’s. She still had all the tattoos that she had currently, but her clothes were more modest than the look she presented to the world now. Something in her eyes was different too. Not just the obvious vampiric red I had seen… but an innocence. She wasn’t tainted by the darkness of the world yet. Whatever happened to her, it hadn’t happened yet in this picture. This must have been one of the happiest memories that she still had.

I stepped back from the bed, taking in the scene. It was clear now: the way she had arranged her bed, the picture beside it, and the fact that she never moved from this spot. Every day, as the sun forced her from the living world, she lay here, staring at that picture until sleep took her.

I started feeling something different in my mind towards her. Alex wasn’t the same person I thought she was anymore. She wasn’t the same person she presented herself as, not at her core. One thing I realized about her was that she seemed lonely. She missed whomever this man was beside her in the photograph. I know what Martin had told me about her, but I wondered… what exactly had happened to her. How long had she been living like this?

On my way out I got the impulse to have a look around. I wouldn’t touch anything, but I wanted to see what kind of things I could find out about Alex. She was one of the most unique creatures I had met in this life. She was a mutation of the normal vampire breed because of her cannibalistic nature, which made her very powerful. I wondered what kind of things I’d find in her lair.

I peeked into the kitchen… nothing. The refrigerator was empty, and the cabinets were bare, but I did find something on a counter that caught my eye. She had a bag of sour candy sitting by itself in the kitchen. It was already opened, and half eaten, making me realize that she had a similar taste to the extremes as I did. It was funny how something so small could make me think we had something in common, even if it was only slight.

I didn’t want to invade her privacy anymore, so I began my exit. I left the same way I came, dropping lightly to the pavement below the balcony as soon as I saw the coast was clear. I had everything Martin and Alex sent me for, and it was only around noon at that point, so I decided to take a very scenic route.

Even though we were all friendly now, I wanted to be alone for a while longer. Seeing Alex’s apartment, and her photograph, made me think of my own family… of Vicky. It brought up emotions of the loss in my life and I wanted to be alone for a while longer. I took my time returning since we had to wait for sunset anyway. But eventually, I came back to the safehouse.

“Well, that took you longer than I thought,” Martin said as soon as I walked through the blazing sun that crept past the door frame. “I began to think you ran into those two shadows again.”

The sun still hung in the late afternoon sky, blocking the path for my two friends to leave the safe house. I shut the front door, cutting the light off from the entrance so the vampires could move freely without burning to cinders. Yet, when I looked around, I only saw Martin. Alex was out of sight somewhere.

“Sorry, I figured I’d think for a while. Clear my head after,” I said.

Martin nodded with understanding.

“From the clinking around in the bag I take it you found everything,” Martin eyed the packed duffle.

“Yeah, I got options for you guys,” I said, unzipping the bag. “I wasn’t sure what weapon would suit you best, so I grabbed a couple different ones to choose from.” Lingerie and cutoff shorts spilled out of the bag as I searched for the weapons beneath.

“Please,” Martin raised his hand. “Let’s give Alex some privacy. I’d hate for her to think I sorted through her personal items.” Martin seemed worried about it in a strange way. “We can let Alex grab her things first.”

“Trust me, I don’t think she’ll care. She sent me straight there for these. I saw a lot of the stuff she’s got tucked away in her dresser. I don’t think she cares,” I offered.

“Still, I would not want to make her uncomfortable,” Martin insisted. “She is like a daughter to me, and I wouldn’t want to invade her personal space.”

“Okay,” I said a little confused. I hadn’t thought of their relationship as a father-daughter dynamic. I thought it was more… intimate, maybe.

I pushed her underwear back down on top of the metal blades and zipped it closed.

“Where is she anyways?” I looked around throughout the blackened spaces of the house.

Martin smiled, “Alex is a creature of habit. She sleeps a lot during the daytime hours, so she’s resting in the bedroom.”

I found myself quickly perturbed and it was only fueled by the monster, “She’s asleep in my…”

Martin quickly cut me off, “My bed… I think is what you mean.” He was quick to remind me, again, that this was his house. I was just a guest. “She too can stay here if she wishes.”

I nodded, realizing I should be more grateful that he was letting me stay here.

“Sorry,” I said. “Sometimes I…” I tried being honest. “Sometimes the thing in me has a lot of push. It gets away from me sometimes.” I picked up the duffle bag, “I’ll set this in there for when she wakes up.”

I silently walked back through the little passageway to the open bedroom. Sure enough, there was Alex, sleeping on her left side in the bed I had grown accustomed to passing the time in. As I set the bag on the side of the bed, I saw her eyes were completely shut and she wasn’t even breathing. She almost looked like she was dead. There was no discernable motion that I could see. The way her body was positioned, facing the small bedside table by her head, reminded me of her bedroom. She looked like she fell asleep while staring at the empty table, exactly how she did in the privacy of her own home. Even without the picture standing upright by her face, I knew she still imagined it there. I backed away quietly so I wouldn’t wake her.

Once I was in sight, Martin asked, “You say “the thing inside,” do you really think of it as a separate person?”

I nodded informatively, “Yeah, most of the time anyway.”

“Do you ever think that is just a copout?” Martin asked unapologetically.

“A copout?” I asked, trying to maintain the annoyance and keep it from leading to anger. I took a seat in the darkness, on the couch opposite him. Waiting to hear more.

“When I was young and newly turned, I too thought of myself, in my darkest moments, as being separate from the real me. However, it took me many years to see that I am all that is here.” Martin pointed into his chest as he spoke.

“You think you know something about me?” I asked bluntly, not masking my feelings about his words.

“I think I know something about myself. I think I’ve seen something similar in many others before you.” Martin never slowed his momentum. He was being brutally honest. “We all feel the push inside of us, once turned. It’s not natural for a human to feel these things, so it is not something anyone is accustomed to initially. But the “beast” inside us all… is our own. It is us, nothing more. The darkest parts of our personalities are brought out by the violent natures of our new tendencies, no matter what we are. You’re no different, Sam.”

“But you don’t know what I am. Not even I do. How can you know anything for sure?” I doubted his words.

“You’ve proven time and again that you can control it when you have the right motivation. In time, I think you’ll learn just how in control you can be… once you accept it,” Martin said, looking into me like he saw great potential. “Thinking your actions are driven by anything other than your own mind, giving into fulfilling your needs, is a folly. Passing the blame on someone, or something that doesn’t exist will never make things better. You must accept that there is no one else. It is only you under there. That’s when real control is possible.”

Martin stopped speaking, leaning back to recline against the cushions of the couch.

I thought about the possibility. What would that mean, if he was right? Did I have the control to possibly return to my family? Did I have it the whole time, and I was just too weak to see it? How could anyone find the strength to resist in the beginning if it was just them, and no creature pulling the strings?

But if that was true… then what happened that night with the old man? Why did I feel utterly locked out of my body as it moved to kill in cold blood?

His words started reminding me of Alex and how she’d never tasted human blood. I wondered about her early life and the picture on her nightstand. Who was that guy standing there with her? Was he family? What happened to him? I found myself wondering about her. I wanted to ask Martin about her again, but that might not be the best thing to do in the present situation. He obviously cared about her more than I realized before the whole duffle bag thing.

Then, as Martin and I sat in the darkness, waiting for the sun to hide itself below the horizon, I thought about his family. What was his story?

“What happened to your family?” I asked quickly. “I mean… I’m sorry. It’s just with everything that’s happened, it makes me wonder. I know you were turned by Charles, but I’ve never heard your backstory before.”

Martin smiled, “That’s all right.” He looked over to the slightly glowing edge of light that crept past the curtains to the wall, “I suppose we have a few more minutes before we can begin our hunt.”

I leaned forward out of my reclining position, sitting up to pay attention to his story. Martin almost mirrored my movements, preparing to explain a part of his history in the dark of the house.

“I was born into a large family in the late seventeen hundreds. There were ten of us, counting all my brothers and sisters.” Martin lightly chuckled in the creeping dark, “My parents had their hands full with us. We weren’t rich, nor were we well connected. My father was a fisherman. My mother stayed home to take care of all of my brothers and sisters. We lived in a small house that barely fit us all… I miss those days. Our family was extremely uncommon with so many children, but we were blessed to have what we did.” Martin was remembering some of his most important memories, and it showed in his expressions. “I was much older when I was turned, however. As you can well see, I look like I am still only thirty-five years old. Yet, I lost family before I was ever turned into a killer.”

“How,” I asked.

“I lost two sisters and a brother to influenza before I was fifteen years old. My father was murdered in a muddy street over the few coins in his pockets. I was the eldest of my brothers when my father died. I took on his role and took a job at the docks, just like my father. I started working when I was about sixteen years old. Most boys that age already worked, but I was working even harder. I had a mother and six siblings that looked to me to take care of them.” Martin’s look grew darker and more reflective. “As the rest of us all grew, we slowly went in different directions. Most of my younger brothers died in the War of the First Coalition. We were never sure exactly what happened, but they never came back. My sisters did what they could to help bring in money through honest means, but… prostitution was hard for lower-class women to avoid. It wasn’t an easy life…” Martin slowed his story.

“I’m sorry, Martin.” I meant it from the most human part of me that was left. I really felt for Martin… and I felt like a dick for asking about all this.

“It’s all history, Sam.” Martin was at peace with it all, continuing with the story, “As time went on and we slowly lost everyone, I stayed with my family. I fished every day, working for whoever would hire me on their boat. When I was done, I’d fish in the river to catch as much food for my family as I could, without having to spend the little money I earned. I continued that way until the night I met Charles.”

“Your creator,” I remembered the silver-haired vampire that helped fight with us. Martin and Charles’ combined strength couldn’t kill the insanely powerful chimera, Phineas. Still, I believe they did stall him long enough for me to be able to separate his head from his shoulders. Aside from the offshoot version of Alex, Martin, and Charles were the strongest vampires I knew.

“Yes. I was returning home with a massive haul of fish,” Martin smiled at the memory. “I caught so many that I could barely carry the weight; that was a good day. I stayed past dark on a riverbank just a mile or so from my home. The fish were almost jumping into my nets like they wanted to be caught. I was walking back with my catch when it happened. I never saw him coming, he just took me into the dark of the night. Something was different for him that night, though. He didn’t just kill me, he turned me into one of his kind… to be his ward or servant,” Martin explained. “That’s what he says… but I think Charles was lonely, although he’d never admit that… not back then anyhow. The rest is as you’d expect. I outlived all of my family, I grew into a darker version of myself, and I killed mercilessly for a long time, Sam. Just like Charles. Together we were… a blight that would pass through villages. I did things, Sam… things that’ll never leave me,” Martin said, his voice carrying the weight of something darker. “I’ve tried to atone, but some things… some things are beyond redemption." His tone was sharp, cutting through any illusion of who he might seem to be now. “Make no mistake, no matter what you think of me, remember this… I am a beast at my core.” His words landed like iron, cold and unflinching.

Then, he sighed, a brief release of the pressure that had built up inside him. The hardness faded, leaving only the regret behind. “Once I came to the States, I started realizing what I had become, and I felt my true self trying to reemerge. Once I stopped blaming the monster in me and realized that it was I who made those decisions, I just couldn’t go on. I couldn’t live with what I had done in my many years, and I sought out a death that I deserved. I heard talk of hunters and went to find them. When I laid myself down at their feet, they did not kill me. They kept me trapped within a cell of silver. As I stayed in their cage, I heard children running and playing on the floor above my head. It stirred thoughts of my childhood; before the flu, before the war, my father, everything I had buried for so long. Carter, Clara, and Frank were running around the house above. I listened to them play, cry, and fight constantly. I felt like I was there with them… a child again.”

“Autumn told me once about the vampires that tried to make you kill them all,” I said, remembering the story.

“Yes, but I couldn’t. When I looked at all their little faces, they reminded me of my own brothers and sisters. I saw all my loved ones that I outlived in their family. Even now, they remind me of what has been lost for so long. I love Carter, Frank, Clara, and all of the rest of them like they are all of my own siblings. They keep me connected to those memories from way back then.”

I slowly nodded as I now looked into the carpet. I understood Martin now more than I ever had. He was exactly like me… Well, he was exactly what I hoped I would be like when I outlived everyone. Will I be able to maintain my humanity once I’m truly alone? Will I find others to care for, people that will remind me of the moments I hold most dear? What will I be like in a hundred years?

After a while of silence, we heard shuffling around in the bedroom. Alex had awoken from her slumber. That’s when we both noticed the sun was down, and the vampires were free to leave the safety of the walls around us.

In a few short minutes, Alex returned to the living room with a duffle bag full of weapons, but empty of her excess clothing. She was wearing jean cutoff shorts and a very low-cut shirt. Her look was a strategy, I saw that now. These young vampires were driven by their emotions and urges. She could play the unsuspecting victim to these younger creatures that didn’t understand themselves yet, only to turn the tides on them. It also helped her stay hidden. If vampires disappeared from a vicious attack by another vampire, word would spread. If they disappeared after finding an attractive girl to take into the shadows, none would suspect the helpless girl. I started to realize that Alex was a smart predator.

She tossed the duffle bag to my feet, clanking the weapons against one another, “Take your pick.”

“I’m all set,” I pulled my silver blade out from behind my back.

“Actually, Sam, it’s probably best if you leave that here. If someone were to see you using that, it could lead back to the Chasses. It’d be better if you had a normal weapon for tonight. No silver,” Martin suggested.

I nodded, “Okay… no silver, I tossed the blade on the kitchen counter. I reached for a shiny knife in the duffle that was of similar size and test-fitted it into the same sheath around my waist. “Like a glove,” I said.

For a moment I had the thought of showing them the blade I could pull from the void, but chose against it. I knew it would only lead to more questions that I didn’t have the answers to. After Martin’s share, I felt like I should open up to him, but this wasn’t the topic, I figured. That shifting weapon was still as big a mystery to me as the abominable snowman. Now that I think about it… he might be real.

“You didn’t mess with anything else in my place, did you?” Alex asked accusingly. “I know raiding my underwear drawer must have been a thrill for you, but I hope you kept your time there short.” She seemed mad at me for bringing her clothes… like she asked.

“Uh… you're welcome,” I said, confused at what was going on.

“Your clothes are in there, Martin. I got all mine out,” Alex spoke to her friend.

“Thank you, Alex. Once I change, we can head out,” Martin said, smirking at me. He was obviously amused by Alex’s resistance towards me for doing my job.

Martin picked up the duffle bag and headed into the bathroom to change. Then it was just Alex and I standing in the darkness of the living room.

“Where’s all your stuff?” I asked, curious, where she put it all. I brought a lot, just grabbing handfuls of things out of her drawers.

“It’s on your bed,” she laughed, obviously jabbing at me. I think she enjoyed it.

I don’t know what my face did, but she was pleased with herself. Whatever expression I held was enough ammo for her to keep attacking me verbally.

“Don’t worry, you creep. I’m not leaving anything here for you to keep as a souvenir. Your grubby little hands have already been on my stuff too much as it is,” Alex spoke down to me as she walked into the kitchen.

“Wow,” I said loud enough for everyone to hear. “I can already tell that this is going to be a fun night.”