Monster

I stood in my monstrous form, a low warble escaping my clenched fangs. My arms ran slick with crimson life, dripping into puddles beneath me. All around me lay the torn and dismembered bodies of creatures that came from the depths. They were nothing compared to the beast inside of me. Jon, the new Jon, was right. I was getting stronger. I felt faster, able to move in and out of people with my massive body as I exchanged one victim for another. I laid waste to every single one of them. Nothing but carnage lay at my feet.

I glanced over, under multiple bodies, to the asshole that had been prodding the beast in some unseen way. The human amongst the vampires had been attacking the monster, trying to find a way to take me out. As soon as I set my eyes on him, I knew… it was him. But why? How had he been doing it? It was his last mistake! There was no doubt about his fate… he was fucking dead and buried underneath a mountain of corpses. He didn’t have a single solid bone left.

I heard voices behind me as I stood in my otherworldly visage. I didn’t turn to look straight at them, I only glanced back to see them in my peripheral vision. Martin and Alex were there, helping Clara sit up and regain consciousness.

I didn’t want to initially, but I calmed the beast inside of my mind. I could feel all the death that surrounded me as my size and stature returned to normal, making me want to remain as the beast. Tendons and ligaments popped and clicked in and out of place as bones shifted around. I shrunk back to normal proportions in the darkness of the rubble-filled area. I was covered in blood, my arms coated, and face spattered in the drying red substance. When I was completely myself again, I looked up, closing my eyes. I took a long breath as I calmed my mind as much as possible. I could feel the outside influence gone. The anger and agitation of the monster had been nullified. Whoever that asshole was… his effects were no more. Yet, the monster itself remained on my mind like a hand gripped tightly around my brain. I wasn’t in full control, but neither was he. Strangely it was like we were blending, wanting the same things.

I looked around the bloodied carnage for some semblance of clothing. One of the vampires that was missing its head had taken the least amount of damage compared to the rest of my victims. He had on an average pair of jeans that looked about my size.

Alex, Martin, and a conscious Clara, all watched me intently as I paced around for clothes, never saying a word. Once I had pants on and was presentable, I eased my way over to them.

Alex had a look on her bloodied face that seemed like she didn’t know what to think. Martin and Clara’s looks were that of recognition, but slight hesitation.

“Are you okay?” I asked Clara.

She nodded fiercely at my question, “I’m alright. My throat just…” she shook her head slightly. “It’s hard to breathe.”

“He had his grip around you for so long that it will take time to heal,” Martin said.

She lightly touched the already forming bruises across her neck, gauging the level of pain she was in.

“Wayland…” Clara strained to speak. “Is he okay? Where is he?”

“He’s alright,” Alex smiled. “We had to force him to leave so he wouldn’t get himself killed. He was dead set on getting to you, even if he had to dig his way through that.” Alex motioned toward the pile of materials that used to be the ceiling. She almost seemed envious.

“Where is he?” Clara asked.

“They’re all outside. Carter is on the phone with Detective Ames. They are trying to get the children you found here sorted out and back to their families. There are going to be a lot of questions about what happened here,” Martin explained. “I can take you to them. I know they are all worried beyond belief.”

“Please,” Clara nodded quickly.

Alex and Martin gingerly helped her to regain her footing. Only her throat was hurt, but the exhaustion that set in from their battling on the other levels of the structure had weakened her. Being choked unconscious right after can’t do the body much good. They started walking out, and then Clara looked back.

“Sam, aren’t you coming?” Clara asked.

I was shocked at her idea. I couldn’t come out like this. If her family saw me this way, covered in blood after I slaughtered as the monster… How could they see me as anything else?

“No,” I said. “You two get her back with them. I’ll stay here and check out this hole.” I motioned back toward the void that ran through the concrete foundation. It led down into a sublevel, and then deeper into the caves beneath the city. With any luck, I might be able to track their path and find others that were tied in with this group of inhuman beasts.

“Sam…” Clara spoke with a rasp in her voice as she called my name. But then she stopped talking. I think she wanted to say something, but the intensity of what she felt as she looked at me choked her words. I didn’t look human down there in the darkness, surrounded by my carnage.

I looked straight back to her, still covered in blood, and just nodded.

I could see the fear in her eyes as she looked at me, remembering the violent flashes of what she did see of my other half.

“Once I’m done down there, I’ll get myself cleaned up. We need to talk about everything that happened here,” I told Martin and Alex. I wanted to pick their brains. I wanted to see how deep Alex’s knowledge went, as well as Martin’s. Maybe they’d know something about the guy I killed. How he was affecting me…

“Alright,” Martin agreed quickly, moving Clara towards the bloodied exit that was littered with fleeing bodies that didn’t quite make it.

My three friends disappeared, exited the building, and were back out under the night sky. Only about a minute later I heard the reunion of Wayland and Clara. I heard tears, promises being made, and embraces that pulled people in close. I wanted to be there. I wanted to feel what they felt. I hoped the rest of them were okay, mentally. Seeing me again, like that… I hoped it didn’t change anything.

I thought of Autumn. I needed to talk to her about so many things. We needed to talk… I needed to talk. I had so many things I needed to say to her. I had no real hopes of regaining her in my life like before, but miracles did happen. Plus, I needed to tell her that nothing that happened was her fault. I also wanted to see her face after everything I just did. Then I’d be able to tell if she still wanted me around after seeing the ruthless killer again.

I plunged deeper into the labyrinth of tunnels and caves, the hours bleeding together in a blur of slick stone and the stench of stale water. My legs were soaked to the bone, the cold bite of the flooded pathways gnawing at my flesh as I trudged through the filth of the city's runoff. Thankfully, it did clean most of the crusted blood from my lower body as I made my way through the darkness. Every step sent ripples through the murky pools. The foul stench of decay clung to the air, a miasma of rot and mold that settled in my lungs with each breath. If I was still human, I’d probably have to set up an appointment to be seen by a doctor immediately.

I wanted to find some kind of hint at the origin of that group of vampires. They had come from below, and there had to be tracks to lead me to more of them. Martin had sworn there were deeper passageways, hidden routes that led further into the city's underbelly, but every lead I followed led only to disappointment. I trailed the faintest whiffs of something other than sewage; faint hints of sulfur, damp earth, or the bitter tang of rusted metal. But I was only met with the unyielding face of solid stone, the natural barrier beneath the city mocking my efforts. I forced myself into every crack and crevice. My skin scraped against jagged rocks as I squeezed through spaces barely wide enough to fit my frame. I traced paths worn by time, faint scuff marks of a passing presence, but all they led to were dead ends and forgotten places.

It felt like there should be some hidden passage, some trick of the rock I hadn’t uncovered. There had to be, that was the only explanation. My black eyes pierced the darkness, cutting through the oppressive void of the caves, every detail of the jagged stone illuminated in sharp, unforgiving clarity. Stalactites hung like the teeth of some colossal beast, dripping with the filth of a forgotten world. Stalagmites jutted up from the ground, slick with grime and as unwelcoming as the tunnels themselves. But for all the clarity my vision offered, it couldn’t show me the way forward. The cave walls were riddled with scars, and fissures that looked promising until you reached their end, realizing it was just another trick of this underground maze.

I had spent the last two years mapping out the subterranean networks, every extension and every bend, convinced I had charted the unknown. But tonight, surrounded by unyielding stone and the echo of my own footsteps, I realized just how little I understood. The passageways were a twisted web of false starts and misdirection, and I was just another lost soul trying to find a way deeper into a darkness that refused to let me in.

Once I called it quits on the underground hunt, I pushed through a thick steel manhole cover that led me back out into the crisp air of the dawn sky. When I cracked the lid to street level, the rising sun hit me right in the retinas, fading my black eyes to white and blue. It was morning in St. Louis, and the sun slightly peering over the horizon gave me a warm comfort. Knowing that the one who was causing me such internal distress had been dealt with, gave me a new calm. I could maybe have that talk with Autumn, now that the manipulation the entity spoke of had been dealt with.

The beast and I were becoming one, more so than ever before. I only felt it struggling to get out because of the one Jon told me about. He was doing something to make the beast lash out. I knew I was back to normal now that he was dead.

Yet, all this didn’t deter me from regaining the relationships I wanted. I didn’t fear for their safety when I thought about it. I wanted to be near so I could keep them safe from things that might be too large for them to handle.

I returned to Martin’s hideout in the early morning shadows before they had all been cast away by the encroaching sun. I was still sprinkled with blood on most of my upper chest area and flecked randomly all over. I knew the vampire blood would burn off and cause some real nasty discomfort, so I stuck to darkened areas. Plus, I couldn’t be seen by the waking populace. So, I snuck back to my hideaway.

Once inside of my borrowed home, and away from any prying eyes, I washed my hands for probably thirty minutes. I knelt in front of the sink, placed my arms in, and just scrubbed. I had so much blood on me from the carnage that it was caked and dried into every crevice of my upper body. After I got the majority of the thickly caked red stain off me, I jumped into the shower. I stayed there for even longer. At one point I just sat on the floor of the tiled area and let the water hit me in the back as I stared into the drain; watching light red trails of blood run down. I felt calm.

For the first time in a while, I felt like I was me again. I had a reprieve from the constant provocation of the beast within. Once I killed that dweeb with the haircut, I felt normal. But… it was more than that. Again, I felt like I was becoming the beast… and the beast was becoming me. I always liked to think of it separately, maybe it helped me process or justify what I had to do, but I was starting to feel differently. Maybe “we” didn’t exist… maybe it was all… just me.

I had a passing thought about Patrick and the man with the slicked black part getting their hair cut by the same person… because they looked ridiculous. Then I was curious, why did he want Patrick? The vampire, I heard Martin call Fitz, called out for him specifically, like that creep was in the shadows whispering that he wanted him. What kind of heinous fate would he have been left to if taken by those from below? Even I had to admit… he didn’t deserve that. I was glad I helped him, too.

I took the last few steps through the trees to the edge of the Chasse property, listening in to determine what kind of state the family was in after the quick turn of events at the Lemp Brewery. I could hear arguing inside the walls of the sprawling but secluded home. It sounded like it was coming from Carter and Zeke.

"When are you ever going to learn," Carter yelled through his anger.

"When are you going to stop treating these monsters like pets and start treating them like what they actually are; the enemy!" Zeke spat back.

"If it wasn't for them, we'd all be dead, and we'd be dead because of YOU!" Carter's words were hard but true. "I never should have put anyone else in danger for you and your ignorant ways. You don't see the risks; all you see is monsters... and you'll risk everyone… your brother, even your own daughter, to hunt the way you do. Why do you think our parents took the time to train us when we were kids? They wanted us to survive, not go down in a random bloodbath because we weren't smart and didn't use the things they taught us."

“Maybe the way your father taught you. There’s a reason my dad fuckin’ left! There’s too much talking with you all. We have to FIGHT them! That’s what our dad taught us!” Zeke was confident in his words. I couldn’t see them, but I knew he was speaking about Arthur who was probably right behind him.

“And look where that’s got you,” Carter said viciously. “Look around you. How many of your fucking family is left, Zeke? Three…” There was a pause there, and no one else spoke. “You keep going this way… you’re all fucking dead!”

With that, the whole house fell silent. The silence didn't last long, but the shock of Carter's words was powerful amongst the family.

As the family's heated exchange continued, I started to realize that neither Martin nor Alex, were there. They must have left once they got everyone back safe. From the sounds of everything, Zeke didn’t approve of their presence.

I never smelled him as the wind was on my back, but there at the edge of the woods was Wayland. His taller frame sat at the base of a tree, looking out into the woods where I always came from when I arrived on foot. I was too nervous as I approached, scared inside at what they’d think after seeing my true form again. I overlooked him.

He connected eyes with me, “Sam!”

“Wayland,” I responded with an unsure tone.

He took a deep breath, preparing himself.

"They've been like this since we got back," Wayland's voice spoke out. He was sitting there like he was waiting for me. He could see that I was listening in to the faint voices he knew were probably still yelling from within the house.

"I didn't expect you out here."

"Yeah I figured you'd come this way," he explained. "I wanted to talk to you before everyone else was around. Plus, I had to get out of there; Zeke's way too loud."

I smirked, "I can tell."

“Listen, Sam," Wayland arose from where he waited, "I haven't given you a fair shot since we've learned that you’re… not human. If I'm being totally honest ... I don’t trust that thing you turn into."

"Yeah... I don’t know if I do either."

"It's not that I'm worried for myself, or even Clara, but I'm worried about my daughter. Delilah means more to me than anything else in this world. Once we found out about you, I just kept picturing you taking her from us, and I’d never see her again."

I didn't even have to respond. He knew it was crazy. I just nodded as he spoke, letting him get everything off his chest.

"I know you’re not the bad guy, Sam. I see that now. When Clara was in that mother fuckers grip..." He shook his head like he was angry and disappointed with himself. "You saved her... not me. If you weren't what you are, whatever that is, she’d be gone. I wouldn't have a wife anymore. Delilah would never get to hug her mother again. I can never repay you..." He spoke the most honest words he had.

"You don't have to worry about that," I assured him.

We both stared at the ground for a minute, thinking different things inside our own heads.

“It's funny you know…”

Wayland perked up quickly, “What is?”

“I feel like it's so easy to help you… your family, with what I am. But I can’t even fucking help myself.”

I didn’t expect him to say anything, and he didn’t. We just stood there for a few minutes.

He took a slow refreshing breath, "As far as Clara and I are concerned, you're one of us.” Wayland looked away from me and up into the trees. “You always have been, I'm just sorry it has taken me this long to see that’s never changed."

"I appreciate that," I said, reaching out to shake his raising hand.

I liked Wayland. He reminded me of myself, the kind of father and husband I would have been... maybe.

"I'd say let's go in, but I think they're still going at it," the tall hunter said.

"It's silent right now," I said as I turned my hearing deeper into the house.

"I don't think they'll be here much longer. After we all got back, Carter pretty much hasn't stopped laying into Zeke. We're kind of in the middle of a family argument that's been brewing for years," Wayland informed.

"I can tell," I nodded.

"Carter, Frank, and Clara have always been more careful about hunting. They train, they plan, and they win. That's how they were taught. Zeke and Arthur train and fight, but they don't spend much time on preparation or planning. Zeke's been that way since they were all younger. Their family has lost a lot over the years. Zeke, Kayla, and Arthur are all that's left of their family, and Carter doesn't want that for us," Wayland explained. “He doesn’t want it for them either, obviously, but you can only lead a horse to water…”

"Why wouldn't they want to do things safer?" I asked, truly confused.

"Their hearts are in the right place; they just think that those kinds of losses come with this life. It’s how they were taught, family death was almost normalized for them growing up. That’s what Clara told me once. I think they would be open to change, but really it's just a pride thing at this point."

Wayland and I sat outside for a little while longer, mostly in silence. We talked casually and I could really tell that he saw me in a new light. I was glad because I liked Wayland. In our conversation, his phone started buzzing and lighting up the small area of trees we were in during the early morning hours.

"What's going on," Wayland answered.

I was already tuned in with my senses so hearing his phone call was easy.

"Hey, where are you at? Things have calmed down a little in here and we want to get everyone back in here to talk," Clara's raspy voice came through the speaker.

"I'm outside," Wayland said, looking at me with a question on his mind. He was wondering if I wanted them all to know I was there with him. I shook my head slightly, and he nodded. "I'll be right in." Then, he flipped his phone closed.

"I don't want to make things worse again if they're calming down. I'll come back," I offered.

"That's probably smart given the state of things here. I'll let Carter and El know you came by once Zeke is clear. I know they'll want to see you, Clara, too. She's very grateful for what you did. She's embarrassed that she let a vampire get the jump on her, but glad you were there."

I nodded, "Thanks. I’ll see ya.”

With that, I stepped back into the shadows of the trees and left the family once again.