Chapter 377: The Last Mission (2)
Kanji was silently trying to gather his emotions. The pain he felt was unbearable. He wanted to reach out and touch her, tell her the truth but the thought of her reaction was preventing him. How would she feel when she learnt that he was dead and now stuck in a limbo as a ghost?
She wanted to see him but once he confessed, they would never be able to see each other again. He would be gone to another world, far away from her whereas she would be left alone to live a long life without him.
Haejong read his dilemma. For once, he pitied Kanji and there was a strange kinship he felt. With Kanji's death, the way to Mina should have been clear for him but he knew that it was futile. Mina loved Kanji in a way she would never love someone else. He had learnt long ago that no matter how much he tried, he could never replace Kanji's place in her life.
Mina was unaware of the dilemma the men were facing but her eyes were on the door. She was subconsciously waiting for the familiar figure who would pop up and annoy her to no end. So many things had happened in the past few days but her love for Kanji remained strong. The hope she held out was dashed every minute, yet she could not give up. Sometimes, she felt that he was nearby but simply out of sight.
Are you in the same pain as I am? She wondered.
"Once I'm gone," Kanji said to Haejong in his mind. "Will you take care of her?"
"No," Haejong replied. "I can't. Once you leave, no one can take care of her because she will be beyond broken. Even if I put back the pieces, the cracks in her heart will remain. And no one can fill them up, Jang Kanji."
"I'm being selfish," Kanji told him. "Using your body to confess but also trying to prolong my time with her. Aren't you afraid that I might want to stay here longer. Perhaps never give you back your body?"
He heard Haejong sigh in his head. "You can try," he said to Kanji. "But you won't. Remember what she just said. If you're her friend, I'm her friend too. And as long as we're her friends, we can't hurt each other. If there's one thing you can't do, Jang Kanji, is say no to Mina."
"You know me too well," Kanji muttered.
"Did you say something?" Mina asked.
"Nothing!" Kanji lied. "Have you eaten lunch?"
"I was actually about to ask you the same thing," Mina replied. "The maid sent me homemade food. I see that you've been eating the meals prepared by the hospital. I know how terrible it tastes so I asked the maid to make some extra porridge for you as well. You want some?"
"Yes!" Kanji exclaimed. "I do! I love the porridge made by Nanny Kim!"
He spoke without any thought before realizing his folly. Inside his head, Haejong wanted to facepalm himself.
"How do you know Nanny Kim makes good porridge?" Mina frowned. "I doubt you've even met her."
"S-she was the one who cooked during the dinner, right?" Kanji asked, feigning to recall her. "On my way to the washroom, I bumped into her and asked what else she made. She mentioned porridge. I like to eat good food. I eat a lot!"
Mina frowned. Since when did Lin Haejong eat a lot? The last time they had a meal together, Haejong barely touched his food and preferred a light salad whereas Mina was chowing down a sloppy burger.
"Uh huh…" she said. "Anyways, the nurse is bringing the food in a tray."
As soon as she said it, a nurse entered the room with a large tray. She put the tray on the bed and bowed before she left. Mina opened the covering from the food and put up a bowl in front of Kanji.
"Come on, eat it all," she ordered. "Otherwise, you won't heal quickly."
Seeing her hold the bowl gave Kanji an idea.
"Ah!" he yelped, pretending to be hurt in his wound. "My wound hurts if I move my hand."
Mina frowned. "Your wound is on your left side," she pointed out. "You'll eat with your right hand."
"Yeah, well my right hand hurts now," he claimed. "You'll have to feed me."
"What?" Mina scowled. "Feed yourself!"
Kanji let out a fake sigh. "Is this what I get for saving you and your niece?" he lamented. "The world is so cruel to good guys like me! And here I thought I was your friend."
He faked another sigh which only confused Mina more. For some reason, Haejong seemed very different. He was more relaxed and open, which was a strange sight. She was so used to him being cryptic and brooding that seeing him talk so casually made her perplexed.
"Are you really alright?" she asked. "Did the bullet somehow hit your head and now you're acting as if you've got a split personality?"
"No," Kanji said, shaking his head. "Let's just say that after my brush with death, I've realized that I shouldn't be taking my regrets to the grave."
He gazed directly at Mina with a serious yet intense look. "All of us have limited time on Earth, don't you think? We waste this little time by letting our egos stop us from doing what we truly want. We chase so many things, leaving behind the ones we care for until one day, they're no longer there. Only when we are on the verge of death, we see that one person whom we have hurt the most. The person whom we love more than our own lives but let our ego drive them away."
Mina was speechless. The way he spoke was odd and yet, familiar. There was something about him which made her heart race but that was not possible. Only Kanji could make her heart feel that way.
Then why...why was she feeling Kanji's vibe emitting from Haejong?
"That day, when I was lying in a pool of my own blood," he whispered. "There was one image which flashed in my mind. It was brief and yet, I felt as if I had been staring at the image for years. The image of the person I love the most. The woman for whom I'm ready to kill. The woman for whom I'm ready to die with a smile on my face."
Mina's eyes were brimming with tears and she did not know why. What was this feeling of loss? Why was she suddenly feeling so sad? The inexplicable pain in her heart was rising and she did not even know why it hurt so much. It felt as if she had lost something precious but was unaware of it.
"Do you know whose image it was?" Kanji whispered. Mina slowly shook her head.
"Whose was it?" she slowly asked. This was it. This was Kanji's moment to tell her the truth.
"It was-"
"Mina!"
Both of them were startled and turned around. Their eyes widened in shock as a familiar figure stood at the doorway.
"Mina…" The figure stepped towards her with a dangerous smile playing on his lips. Mina stood up in shock while Kanji and Haejong were disgusted.
"That's…" Haejong's voice echoed in his mind. "Is that…"
"Kanji," Mina whispered. Anyal stood there in Kanji's body, flashing her a smile.
"I'm back, Mina!" he exclaimed. "Only for you."