MHA: A Cat’s Way

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“Nya, this hurts.” I’m practically swaying on my feet! That last swing Ass Might hit me with rattled my head pretty good. Nekomura holds out her hand, offering me what looks like a marble.

“Eat this, Goddess. You’ll feel much better.” I glare at her, trying to shake my head, but that’s a bad idea since it sends me stumbling to the side.

“Nya.” I hold a hand to my head to try and stop the spinning while simultaneously trying to glare at the troublemaker in front of me. But I sigh, accepting that proper punishment can wait until after I stop feeling like I’m going to throw up.

Suddenly there’s a hand in front of my face, forcing something hard into my mouth. I press my lips together to stop the intrusion, but it’s insistent. Someone suddenly pinching the tip of my ear has me jumping, a gasp of surprise letting the object roll onto my tongue.

It’s nasty.

My nose scrunches up in distaste, and I want to spit it out, but the hand is still there. Except now it’s trying to keep my mouth closed! Make up your damn mind! At least the scratching behind my ear is nice. And it’s a familiar pattern…

“There, there,” the troublemaker soothes as I lean into the other person’s hand with my eyes closed. “Once it melts, you’ll be all better.”

“The hell are you noobs doing? Just kill her and be done with it.”

I don’t need to have my eyes open to feel the glares directed at the man in front of us. As a cat, I can bask in their negative emotions as much as I want while taking a nap…

“Now, now, Tomura. I’m sure there’s a reason she’s been brought here, so let’s wait and see. You can always kill them if you dislike their reasoning.”

Luckily, before I can drift off to sleep, the fog in my head clears up and my eye and ear stop twitching. I groan as I open my eyes, finally able to understand what’s going on instead of simply seeing it. And since I’m now fully aware, the first order of business-

“Ow!”

-is to smack Nekomura on the back of the head.

She looks at me with a pout, but recent bouts of incredible stupidity render any pleas for mercy ineffective! The withering glare I send at her is enough to have her looking down, though I can tell she’s just going through the motions to satisfy me. Sighing, I instead turn to the person who’s still scratching behind my ear.

My glare isn’t nearly as effective given how often I’ve directed it at them. Even if they have disguised themselves as a different person. “Care to explain why mew all were there, Himi?”

Smirking at me, they pull their hand away as a mud-like substance rapidly falls off of them, revealing my most chaotic friend, (and the person I’m positive is the one who orchestrated this) Himiko Toga.

Luckily she was wearing actual clothes while transformed instead of using what the boy she copied was wearing, so she’s not naked when she puts one hand behind her back and the other on her cheek. “Who, us? Hmm~.”

She puts on a thinking face, and I feel my ears start twitching again. But this time it’s not because of a blow to the head. Just when I’m considering emptying out her blood supply back at our base, she taps a fist into her palm. “Oh yeah! We joined up with these guys because they said they were going to kill All Might!”

She turns to the man- I think his name is Shigaraki?- with a pout. “You guys kind of sucked at that. Guess you can’t expect much from some dumb bird. You’ve gotta stick with cute things all the way~.”

Aaannd now she’s glomping onto me, completely ignoring the situation. Though I should have expected this given her personality. “Sigh. Himi, I’m going to knead more information than that. I went along with the act because I trust mew, but this is still a major risk for meow.”

She nods her head before pointing at Shigaraki, who’s hand is twitching. Ah, yes. The Toga effect. A phenomenon where you either want to cuddle or strangle Himi. The only ones immune to this effect are those close to, or at, her level of crazy.

Thankfully he holds himself back so she can explain uninterrupted. I’d rather not have to kill him before getting the whole story. Especially since I’m running empty on cats to summon.

“You remember that job I texted you about yesterday?” At my nod, she continues. “Well, it turns out that these guys, the ‘League of Villains’, made a plan to attack All Might. They were just trying to find a good opportunity on when to do it.”

“Which they found when they clawed their way through the gate with the press.” I finish, and she snaps her fingers.

“And BINGO was his name-o~. Anyways, since they decided to attack the school, I figured that I should get the Cult involved and surprise you! Even got the blood of a guy with an animal control quirk to give you a valid excuse to attack All Might yourself.”

She shrugs. “After that, we showed up, killed a creepy midget, and you got your claws into All Might!” She beams at me and grabs my hands, hopping in place. “You stabbed All Might! You’ve been wanting to do that for years! How did it feel!? Was it AWESOME!?!?”

I try to stand my ground. I really do. But honestly…

“Nya, fine. Yes it was amazing, nya! AND OH MY NYA, DID YOU SEE HIS FACE!? IT WAS ALL ‘MEOW’ WHEN I FIRST ATTACKED HIM, AND THEN WHEN I ATE PARTS OF THE NOMU!? NYANYANYANYA!!!”

I’m hopping right along with her, finally unable to hold back how fucking good it feels to finally strike back at the bastard! When I think of his face when I finally got a good hit in, I can’t help but laugh!

Oh, I know that it’s going to be hell trying to get my story straight without telling any lies. I’d bet a year’s supply of catnip that they’re going to be bringing in that lie-detector detective when I go back. I did get ‘kidnapped’ by a villain organization that attacked the school, after all.

But for now I’m happy to share this moment of excitement with my closest friend. With some punishment for putting me into a complicated situation of course.

“Nya-ho!” With a shout of effort, I set myself while Toga jumps one more time, and I heave her above me then down onto the floor behind. I look down at her groaning form with a smirk.

“Mew didn’t really think that you’d escape punishment, did you, nya?”

“It was worth a shot.” She groans out.

Shaking my head with a chuckle, I turn to the League of Villains, who’ve been kind enough to wait for our conversation to finish. Well, the mist guy has been patient. Shigaraki has pulled out a handheld game while he waits. But he’s keeping a finger on each hand off of it while playing. I wonder if it has something to do with his quirk?

Putting the thought aside for the moment, I give them a sweeping bow with my arm across my chest and the opposite leg extended behind me.

“My apologies, nya.” The mist guy gets Shigaraki’s attention, and after pausing the game he turns back to me.

“As I first meowed,” I continue. “I would like to help the League in their hunt for All Might.”


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