Lust for the King’s Wife

Chapter 4: Matryoshka of Loss (3)

The princess’ twisted sense of possession resembled the king’s.

Her stubbornness and blunt speech were also like the king.

But everything else about her resembled her.

Her pale, ghostly white skin. Her lips, as red as a ripe apple. Her silvery hair, closer to pure white than silver.

The princess was like a miniature trap crafted from the king’s spirit and the queen’s embrace, made solely for me.

If her eyes had been violet, just like her eyes, I would have been swallowed whole long ago, wandering through purgatory. 

Fortunately, the curse of the gods hadn’t reached that far, allowing me to push her away — at least for now.

“That’s enough, Princess.”

“‘Enough,’ huh? Are you giving me orders in my house? This isn’t the wild plains where your words were absolute, Hero. This is the royal palace.”

“That doesn’t mean you can threaten a member of the Hero’s Party as you please. And it certainly doesn’t make it right.”

“No. I can do it. Because I’m the princess.”

It was simple logic, but it was also undeniable. If she had been a little more mature, someone would have already been hung from the city gates.

Fortunately, she was still a child. No matter how grown-up she seemed, her mind had yet to fully mature. And as long as that remained true, I had room to maneuver.

“Princess.”

“Yeah?”

“If you keep acting like a brat, I’m going to get angry.”

“Oh? How are you gonna get angry? Show me. I’m really curious now.”

“If you insist, I have no choice.”

I ended my words with an ominous note and took a step toward her. As the distance between us shrank to just one or two steps, I raised both hands and placed them on her shoulders.

Then, I reached up and grabbed both of her cheeks with all my strength.

“Aaaaah! Owww! It hurts, Alf! It hurts!”

“It’s supposed to hurt, Princess.”

“You… you monster! This is treason! Rebellion!”

“No, it’s just a simple scolding. So it’s perfectly fine.”

“Gaaaah! It hurts! It hurts, it hurts, it hurts!”

All the pride and grandeur she had just moments ago vanished as the princess reverted to a simple child, wailing at the top of her lungs.

No matter how much she might call herself a princess, she was still just a girl craving attention.

If I could back it up with perfect logic, she’d have no choice but to give in. And clever arguments were my specialty.

“And besides, Princess, you made comments about imprisoning an elf and made statements that could cause international diplomatic incidents. That’s a serious crime, you know.”

“I-I was joking! You know that, right? I mean, sure, I don’t like Seha, but I wouldn’t actually— AAAAAAH!”

“Joking about something like that makes it even worse, Princess.”

“I said I’m sorry! I’m sorry! Please let go of me!”

Her eyes were brimming with tears, on the verge of spilling over. Only then did I release her, gently rubbing her reddened cheeks.

“Do you understand what you did wrong now?”

“Uuugh… It hurts so much…”

“Princess, do you understand what you did wrong?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know I went too far, okay? So stop nagging me.”

“So, you’re saying…?”

“I’m sorry, Alf.”

“That’s all I needed to hear.”

At her late but sincere apology, I nodded in satisfaction and stood up. The princess glanced up at me with an uneasy look on her face.

“You’re not, like… super mad, are you?”

“Not at all. I was just worried you might do something terrible to my companions.”

“You know I’m not that kind of person. Or… wait. Are you saying you care more about that elf than you care about me?”

“You’re both important to me, Princess. But you… you’re a little more precious.”

“Then that’s all that matters.”

With just those words, she shook off all her earlier feelings and once again buried herself in my chest. This time, she didn’t embrace me as a woman. She did so as a girl.

A girl who had been kidnapped in the prime of her youth and forced to grow up in fear. Her shell had been cracked and stretched to look like an adult, but inside, she was still just a girl to me.

“It’s alright, Princess. I’m not mad. So stop crying, okay?”

“I wasn’t crying. My face just hurt a little, that’s all.”

“I’m glad to hear that. Maybe the Flower Kingdom’s fairies will leave a gift under your pillow at the end of the year.”

“See? That’s what I’m talking about. You always treat me like a kid. I don’t believe in that stuff anymore, you know.”

“Is that so.”

Even a princess who cried after having her cheeks pulled doesn’t believe in fairytale miracles anymore. But I, too, had once clung to comet tails, whispering my wishes into the night. Perhaps I was still clinging to the edge of childhood myself.

If I wanted to step off that edge and grab hold of the stars, I’d have to come up with a more realistic plan. My wandering thoughts gradually hardened into resolve.

“In that case, I’d like to offer my own apology, Princess. For my words back in the audience chamber earlier. I know I must have hurt you with what I said.”

“Hmph. It’s a little late for apologies, don’t you think?”

“Probably. And besides, there’s someone else I owe a greater apology to.”

“Who?”

“The Queen.”

The princess blinked, her face momentarily puzzled. She tilted her head slightly, squinting at me.

“What for? You’re gonna see her anyway, so why not just do it then? You don’t need to ask me.”

“Even a hero can’t just request an audience with the Queen whenever he wants. And after what I did, I doubt she’d want to see me.”

“So you’re asking for my help?”

“Yes, Princess. If you help me, you can arrange a meeting without issue. And if you’re there with me, I think I’ll have the courage to properly apologize.”

“Hmm…”

“Can you help me with that?”

Like a fisherman carefully baiting his hook, I whispered treacherous words into her ear. I already knew what her answer would be.

And as expected, she responded with a bright, delighted voice.

“If you need me, then of course I will.”

“Thank you, Princess.”

Was it because I had told a lie for the first time in my life?

The warmth of her embrace, which I held tightly against my chest, stabbed at my frozen heart.

Oddly enough, it didn’t hurt as much as I’d expected. If anything, I felt like I might get addicted to that sensation, so I quietly and subtly pushed her away.

Back in the banquet hall, the party continued as planned.

Though there had been a small commotion earlier, the kingdom’s distinguished guests were gracious enough to let it slide. After all, once the wine started flowing, they laughed it off as a playful moment.

The king himself was no exception. By the time he was drunkenly performing a sword dance in the center of the hall, it was clear the party had reached its natural conclusion.

Not long after, the king, now completely intoxicated, was practically carried off to his chambers by his ministers.

We were also guided to a large room that had been prepared for us.

Perhaps it was the fatigue from the journey, but Seha, who had drunk just as much as the king, collapsed on the bed and began snoring almost immediately. 

Even Jorfe, the ever-stoic sage who had been caught in endless debates with scholars, sat beside her, eyes closed in exhaustion.

But sleep eluded me.

Unable to rest, I made my way to the balcony.

The moon, its light dulled by a haze, hung in the sky like a misshapen coin. Clouds of mist swallowed the edges of its glow, making the night feel colder than it actually was.

“…”

Was it the countless lanterns lit across the palace grounds?

The stars were nowhere to be seen in the sky. The glow of the world below had outshined them, blotting them from view. It made the heavens seem lonely, like a forgotten canvas, empty of even the faintest starlight.

Or perhaps it was because, in this palace, only one star was allowed to shine.

I accepted this bitter thought, lifting my gaze to the sky once more.

There, one solitary star had appeared, shining brightly as if it were the only light in the heavens.

I gazed at it quietly, my thoughts turning inward. As I sat on the balcony’s edge, my mind drifted further and further away.

Until I heard a familiar voice behind me.

“The royal palace is cold, huh? Must be because it’s built on high ground.”

“Jorfe. I thought you’d be asleep.”

“You know I’ve never needed much sleep. And being in an unfamiliar place only makes it worse.”

“Not like you to be picky about sleeping arrangements.”

“A proper sage chooses his resting place carefully. Besides, after you caused that scene earlier, how could anyone get a good night’s sleep?”

I had no rebuttal for that. Even if I had a hundred mouths, I wouldn’t have been able to refute him.

Jorfe came up next to me and leaned against the balcony’s railing, tilting his head to look at the same sky I was staring at.

“What were you thinking, Alf? You knew what would happen, didn’t you?”

“Who knows? Maybe I went a little crazy for a moment.”

“It would take at least 80 more years of aging for you to develop that kind of madness, and even then, you’d probably overcome it. Besides, you’re not the kind of guy who does stupid things for no reason.”

“If you have something to say, then say it.”

“I just want to know why you did it. Do you really love that witch?”

I slowly lowered my gaze and looked him in the eyes.

At the same time, his emerald-green eyes, like the leaves of an old oak, met mine head-on.

It was hard to look away. His gaze had the kind of weight that could pin a person down.

“I already told you, Jorfe. If you know me at all, then you should already know the answer.”

“I don’t know. And I have no intention of digging through your mind to find out. Every time I look into your thoughts, it makes me feel like I’m catching an infection.”

“Then stop asking. I don’t even have the patience to be interrogated by a sage.”

“Alf, I’m just…”

“Besides, it’s not something you need to concern yourself with anymore.”

It wasn’t so much that I was being cold. I was simply stating the truth, plain and simple.

Jorfe understood that. His lips quivered as if he wanted to say something, but no words came out.

“They say a sage’s advice is worth a million gold pieces. They say an elf’s love takes a thousand years of patience. Somehow, I got both for free. But miracles like that only happen in fairy tales.”

“Hearing you say that makes me feel a little betrayed, you know?”

“The Hero’s Party is forever, huh? But mercenaries like us have to disband when the job’s done. Seha’s going to get tired of this adventure soon, and you’ll be off to chase knowledge again. After all, the hunger for curiosity is worse than the thirst for a Harbit sage like you.”

“Haha…”

“So I’ll be off too — off to do something crazy. If you ever need my advice, you’d better have a million gold pieces ready.”

The past is something fools forget, the ordinary regret, and sages accept. Jorfe was firmly in the latter camp.

He wouldn’t cling to me or chase after me.

“If you weren’t human, I would’ve invited you to Harbit. Honestly, you’re more of a scholar than a hero, Alf.”

“You say that, but you still made me behead a dragon.”

“Then I guess I’m no true sage either. But this time… this time, I couldn’t let it go. I wanted to hold on for once. I wanted to know what you were thinking before it was too late.”

“‘Too late’? What are you talking about?”

“Because we had a visitor earlier.”

The sudden shift in the conversation made me narrow my eyes in confusion.

“A visitor?”

“Yeah.”

“Who?”

“The queen.”

“…What?”

I froze. My lips pressed together as my heart skipped a beat.

No, Jorfe wasn’t the type to lie about something like this. If he said it, it was true.

Realizing that, I knew exactly what I had to do next.

Jorfe must have realized it too, because he calmly stepped aside, clearing a path for me.

“She said she’d wait for you.”

“…”

“She’s probably still outside.”