Isekai’d Shoggoth

The morning was a little bit more awkward than I expected. Primarily because Selene had decided to apologize again for "horning in on your territory" to Bridgit and Moon Unit. Who had the bright idea to start teasing Selene about "becoming a wife" which lead to awkward attempts to explain on Selene's side that she "still likes D better", which was followed by her having to (awkwardly) explain what she means by D, which was followed by Bridgit and Moon Unit blushing and berating Selene for being "lewd". I admit, all this awkward back and forth had permitted me to create some meringue, which nicely distracted everyone. Then Bridgit got pouty over me hijacking her "maidly" duties again so I had to remind her that meringues don't quite qualify as breakfast.

So we're now sitting around the table, sans Selene, who had begged off after having a coffee. She, apparently, feels she is "behind on homework", which is entirely possible and I entirely approve of her doing the responsible thing about her education. Which, in turn, leaves me with Moon Unit and Bridgit. "So." - I offer - "Who has any ideas? I have to be here because I might get called to castle at any moment to check up on Edward, so..." Moon Unit and Bridgit exchange glances, blush and stare down. Well, that was amusing, but leaves me with no actual clue as to what to do. Thankfully, this is where we are interrupted by knocking on the door.

It's Al, and given his face, he has odd news. "Terribly sorry, but it looks like your conversation with prince Edward will have to be postponed for a couple days, Lady Gillespie." - he offers without much ado - "He had woken up suddenly in the middle of the night, panicked because of circumstances in which he fell asleep, tried to climb out of the window and fell from the third floor down into the hedge, where he spent the rest of the night. He is currently sick with a grave cold, has a broken ankle and his mind is clouded with fever. Sir Pasteur had already attended to him and he is positive Edward will recover finely, but he insists on bed rest and complete serenity for at least two weeks. He is of opinion that Edward might have a nervous fever if he were to have a... complicated discussion while his health is weak. I have volunteered to inform you of this unfortunate happenstance."

And of course things with Ed can never be simple. Damn. Alright then, I'll just find some better things to do in the meanwhile. "Thank you, Al. Mind telling the same to Selene? She must be worried about Ed too." - I offer to him. He adopts a... complicated face expression on hearing that.

"Are you certain about that?" - he whispers - "Now that Edward's no longer under the spell, there is no obstacle to your engagement..." And this is where I bop his head.

"Al, for crying out loud. Think. This brand was not placed seven years ago. It's not even a year old, by the looks of it." - I whisper back to him furiously - "Why would I want to tie my fate to a boy who couldn't be arsed to visit his fiancée for seven years? I lived in the county, yes, but I have had been in the capital a number of times. Father let the castle know about his presence each time, went on audiences with the king. Ed had every opportunity to see me at those times, if he so wanted, and no one would object to him wanting to see his fiancée. He did NOT. Does it not strike you as ODD that you know me way better than Edward does? And it's not like you made an effort to seek me out either, you just acted as every gentleman would. So tell me again, why is that I would want to restart my engagement to a boy who blatantly neglected me and deny him to a girl he actually likes and I consider a good friend?"

...Aaand apparently Alistair had never actually considered the full implications of what Edward did. Or never bothered to think it through deeply enough. In any case, he looks shocked. "Do you mean to say?..." - he begins, then cuts himself off - "...I, yes... I guess I can understand this. So... the plan is still to achieve a mutually amiable dissolution of engagement and promote Edward's budding relationship with lady Selene?"

"Yes, Alistair. Yes." - I tell him with as much emphasis as I can put on it - "I am, most emphatically, against being married to Edward, regardless of his reasons for recent oddities. It is well known that even chrysanthemum is helpless in the face of true love. So I believe I can say with certainty that Ed has no love towards me. Maybe we can be friends once he recovers, but marriage is off the table."

He sighs. "I understand." - he agrees - "But allow me to say that he does not truly understand what he is going to miss." He kisses my hand and departs, presumably to fill Selene in. And I turn to my girls with a smile.

"Welp, nevermind." - I tell them - "My schedule is suddenly eminently clear. What do the two of you say to a lazy day on the roof? Snacks, lounging, great view and...." I pause and doublecheck, and yes, the hookah is still where I put it down and forgot about it - "And exotic relaxation."

Of course, some of the aforementioned has to be prepared, so Bridgit insists on going to market (with eyespider supervision that I tactfully omit to mention) while I prepare some of the sweets with the help of Moon Unit. Busying about preparing foods and drinks lasts all three of us until almost midday, when we're suddenly... ready.

"But, how are we getting to the roof?" - Bridgit inquires only to gasp and flail as I suddenly snag both of them and the supplies and tentacle out of the window and onto the roof in one huge swing. "Oh gods WHY?!" - she yelps, while Moon Unit offers more subdued but no less heartfelt - "Whooa!!"

Next five minutes the two of them berate me for terrifying them and "exposing" myself with that stunt. What I don't tell them is that I already verified with eyespiders no one has the line of sight on us. So I just smile and tickle them while they rant. They notice and switch over to tickling me in return. Which leads to shaky tentacles and letting them go before I drop anything fragile. Which is when they notice the gazebo.

"Was that always here?" - Bridgit asks curiously - "And how come I never saw it from the ground?"

Moon Unit shakes her head - "No this is actually something new." She leans into the gazebo, looks around it for a moment, then pulls back and quirks her brow at me. "Alyssa." - she drawls - "Did you build a gazebo on the roof of Academy just to impress us?"

"Among other things. I also thought it would be nice to have a secluded place to relax. And found out the other students use the roof intermittently as a place to hide out..." - I explain as I spread out the mats and pillows I have prepared beforehand for gazebo use. The hookah goes on the central table. "Does anyone have any objections to rose flavor?" - I quip, and both of them shake their heads.

"Mistress, what is this? A censer?" - my maid asks curiously as I continue filling up and assembling hookah. Moon Unit finds herself a nice place within the gazebo and settles down, nabbing a meringue out of the snack basket. She apparently finds meringues to be incredibly appealing. Bridgit, meanwhile, is more fond of marzipan. Sitting down next to Moon Unit, I attach the hose to the hookah and take a long slow drag, letting the molasses vapor waft out of my nose and mouth into the air. Bridgit claps her hands. "Mistress, you're like a dragon." - she quips excitedly.

I lean over and offer her the mouthpiece - "Want to try?" It... goes moderately well, because after a cautious first drag, Bridgit gets cocky and tries to draw a lungful to imitate my dragon impression. Which leads to her coughing rings of smoky vapor in every direction. Thankfully, I manage to snatch the mouthpiece from her before she upsets the hookah. Moon Unit is much more cautious after that, and successfully manages to imitate my first attempt. Bridgit pouts at us. She is more successful on the second try, though neither of them is quite as interested in smoking as I am. Then again, sitting on the roof, puffing the hookah and spoiling wives with treats... Does one really need more to be happy?

___

And I may have overdone it a little bit with relaxation, because I have two wives napping on me. Then again, I do have some comforters handy, and why not? I spread a couple of them over the girls and my own lower end, leaving only their heads poking out. Me, I have my hands and shoulders above the comforter line. Goodness. This is the life. And to underline that, I take a minute-long drag from the hookah. Puffing it out floods the whole gazebo roof with smoke, sending it curling out of the edges. And that's when I hear double yelps from somewhere to the side.

Two students show up in short order. Both of them on their third and last year in the Academy, if I remember right.

"Oh... My apologies." - the guy offers quietly - "I have thought the gazebo caught on fire. Ah, but where are my manners. My name is Lincoln Cromwell, and this is my fiancée, the inimitable Cordelia LaCroix." His companion curtseys briefly. I wrack my mind. Cromwells are... viscount family from the southern coast, and LaCroix are holding adjacent barony. Makes sense why they'd be fiancées, but I'm guessing they're also pretty happy with each other.

"Do forgive me for not standing up, but..." - I glance at the heads on my sides meaningfully - "My name is Alyssa Gillespie. Would you like to sit with us? Plenty of space, and I could use a second opinion on some of my sweets."

They notably perk up as I introduce myself. Cordelia much more so, however. "Lady Gillespie?" - she repeats - "Is it not your mother who invented eau fleurie du nord, perchance?"

I briefly consider correcting them, but then decide that I don't actually object to people thinking my mother is the one who invented the perfume. "Indeed. I take it you're one of her happy customers?" - I return.

"Oh, very much so." - she gushes - "It's hard to notice here because of your censer, but I'm actually favoring lavender flavor. It's just so relaxing..."

And this is where I levitate a pair of meringues out in front of them. They're... a little surprised. Then Lincoln slaps his forehead, leans to Cordelia and points at my sleeve.

"Forgive me for asking, lady Gillespie, but are you really using just a facsimile to levitate objects?" - he asks a bit incredulously.

"Yep. But there is a secret to it." - I tell him conspiratorially - "I'm using more than one at once."

He blinks, stares, slaps his forehead again and generally looks like someone who just had a minor epiphany of the "why the hell didn't I think of that?" type.

Meanwhile, Cordelia takes notice of meringue floating in front of her in much more direct way. She takes it out of the air and takes a hefty bite out of it.... And pauses. And stares. And then wolfs it down as quickly as possible. "Lincoln, you HAVE to try it." - she demands, turning his attention to the one still floating in front of him. He snatches it, sniffs at it curiously, then takes a bite. His reaction is largely similar. He stares at it, then wolfs it down.

"This had zukerrohr in it, right?" - he inquires - "And... some sort of... No, I don't even know how does one make something like this. Is this a piece of a baked cloud?"

He is more then a little flabbergasted at my explanation that this is nothing more then sugar and egg whites whipped into a cream. And I make a mental note to "invent" a magic-assisted eggbeater, because I have a feeling hand whisks are not going to cut it if I make meringue recipe available to the general public.

"I guess that both of you found this treat appealing then?" - I inquire and get two enthusiastic nods in return. "Very well. How about this?" - I inquire, levitating a clump of marzipan for each of them. They snag the sweets out of the air, eager to try them out.