Isekai Speedrun

In the anime, Self-Destruction Dance was the first major side character that Crystal Pencil invited to the Starfish Mansion. This happened immediately after Revolution Movement was founded.

Crys had met Dancer previously and used him as an errand boy, but if anime timeline was to believed, he found out about his strongest special ability later. Was it a strange coincidence, or did Crys take Dancer under his wing originally because he saw that there was something strange and interesting about him? Either way, Dancer was part of the story like a dark comedy sidekick from the beginning to the end.

Dancer's hidden special ability was that he could blow himself up like a MOAB or a small nuke without the pesky radiation fallout. The weakness of it was that it was one-time use ability, of course.

The true power of Dancer's suicide explosion was unfortunately never seen in the anime, so I had no idea how far we should run and hide, if Dancer ever goes off. But since his role is to be our final backup, we just have to take our chances if our situation really gets that bad.

In the final season, Dancer did try to trigger his suicide attack at Reignland to blow up Caliph's palace in the City of the Sun, but failed – he got stuck inside the Strangers' Cube in the palace garden and couldn't move. His explosion ability required spinning dance moves similar to whirling Sufi dervishes; hence the name.

But rather than his one-time explosion ability, in the game he also had a related secondary ability – and more importantly, if his secondary ability existed here, it meant that this world was closer to the game than the anime, at least ability-wise. His one-time explosion ability was triggered by a whirling dance, but if he didn't go overboard with the spins, he could cancel the dance midway and use the wind-up alone to launch a wide-area knockback attack.

I explained Dancer's ability to Crys in detail.

“A suicide bomb, then. I should have a talk with him.” (Crys)

“Yeah, he goes BOOM like a gunpowder warehouse, if he spins in place like a dervish for a while. He's one of the– oh, and speaking of sidekicks, there's another guy we should talk with if he's here, but I'm not sure I know his name yet.”

“Yet?” (Crys)

“In the future, his street name was, or is, Test Subject. But he was also called Volunteer and Green Free in the past, and since past is now, I'm not sure if he uses those names at this point.”

“What does he looks like?” (Crys)

“He looks around thirty years old, built like a gladiator, white skin, short brown hair, probably wears a gray vest and gray shirt, south style. Lives somewhere in this territory or will live in this territory in the near future. He's crazy-obsessed with Strangers technology, he tries to find items and use them on himself, and doesn't really care what those items do to him... I'm not sure if you have met him or not, have you?”

“No, your description doesn't ring a bell.” (Crys)

“We will find him eventually, I'm sure.”

That settles the timeline. Crys and Subject (or Bustset, like fangirls called this handsome beefcake) don't know each other yet. This point in timeline is well before the flashback scene where Test Subject talked to Crys about his desire to travel to Reignland.

Hmm...? In the anime, Test Subject traveled to Reignland, Mu Continent, and begged the nobles to test their mysterious Strangers' devices on himself. Because of this, he eventually turned into a wheelchair-bound and mentally handicapped vegetable, but gained specials powers that could be triggered with patterns of yarn tied to his fingers. In the second season of the anime, Crystal Pencil learned the yarn patterns and used Test Subject like a programmable killer robot. He was either 100% off like a vegetable, or 100% on like a spasmic berserker without limiters.

I should stop him from going to Reignland in this timeline. I don't want to turn a guy into a zombie vegetable just because he'd be more efficient as a weapon. Same goes to Mirim.

I can convince T-Sub to stay in Ur with my knowledge about Strangers technology.

Dancer is a walking bomb from the start, so I can't prevent that from happening. Then again, Test Subject without his powers is an annoying Strangers otaku who turns every conversation into a paranoid magical conspiracy theory. So the real question is: do I really need Test Subject on this run?

He's a trustworthy NPC with useful skills, but is he a required companion? His life in this point isn't one of suffering and hardship like with the other characters either, so I don't need to particularly save him from anything.

“If he is obsessed with Strangers' devices and you wish to find him, you should spread a rumor that you possess such a device and let him come to you.” (Crys)

“Oh, good call.”

Sit back and let the person you are looking for do the legwork. Classic Crys.

“Yes, I will recognize him if he shows up. We should do that... But you know, I've given you enough info for free already. Let's make a contract and I will continue.”

“So, you think you have proven yourself?” (Crys)

“Yes. I mean, I understand what you're doing. You keep dangling the promise of contract on my face and try to pump free info without committing to anything. I demand a contract... please? It doesn't have to be a big contract, a small contract is fine. A time-limited special deal for a time traveler, perhaps?”

“He's mocking us, brother.” (Kimono)

Crys stared at me, weighing his options and considering the outcomes. In the game, Crystal Pencil got a heavy prestige point penalty for breaking a contract mission. He had built his business reputation on unswerving contracts, so he couldn't write them lightly.

“Fine. I offer a time-limited contract. If your information proves to be true, we will make another contract in the future.” (Crys)

“Yes, of course! Time-limited contract if perfectly fine.”

“Brother...” (Kimono)

“I give him one month.” (Crys)

“Yes, monthly co-op contract is good. I provide info and strats, you provide weapons and muscle.”

“You are fine with only that?” (Crys)

“Yes, definitely. Challenge accepted!”

I got the job! The dragons accepted my business pitch and I got the seed funding! One month probationary period is plenty for me, a month of grinding is basically an eternity in my world.

He'll surely promote me to a full-time senior consultant of the Crystal Arms Inc. soon. I have just the right skillset for the job: Canon Knowledge, Force Dialogue, Chair Smash Combo, Four-Thirty Roll and Polebooting. I should ask about retirement benefits and dental plans before signing, though. Hahaha.

While I was thinking silly things, Crystal Pencil took out a brown-yellowish paper sheet and a black stick that looked like a stylized metallic feather. The black stick was the weird Strangers item that gave him his street name: Crystal Pencil of Blood Ink, as it was called in the game lore.

Pricking his left thumb with a sharp pin and smudging blood on the paper, Crys started writing the contract with the pencil. The pencil had the curious effect of turning human blood into photoluminescent ink. It was reassuring to see that the pencil worked just like in the series.

It didn't actually have any magical effects like making the contract magical, cursed or unbreakable. Crys simply used the unspoken assumption of “magical contract” as a sales gimmick for ignorant and gullible customers. We both knew it was basically just an ancient Strangers tattoo gun for slave branding.

“Sign with your blood.” (Crys)

“Can I read it first?”

“Sure.” (Crys)

After carefully checking the wording of the agreement, I took my own deco dagger and placed the tip on my left thumb. I couldn't immediately prick my thumb with it, so Kimono took the initiative and pressed my hand down.

“Ow! No need to get violent, I'm signing it!”

“Don't dare to try anything.” (Kimono)

“I'm just signing a contract with your bro… Street name is fine, right?”

“It is fine.” (Crys)

I squeezed a few drops blood on the paper and wrote down “Speedrun” as my name. The blood turned to shining ink and Crys rolled the contract back into his bag.

Whew. After signing the contract, I sucked my thumb. I should be careful about wound infections and put some of that stuff I bought from the store on my finger later.

“You knew about this item as well.” (Crys)

“Yeah. Crystal Pencil of Blood Ink, they call it... in the future.”

“Then you know we didn't sign anything truly binding.” (Crys)

“Yes, but I also know you need to keep up the appearances for your more ignorant business partners.”

“Exactly so.” (Crys)

Tettere~te! You have joined a party! Two out of seven main characters obtained. I imagined the party formation sound ringing in my head.

I was finally out of solo mode grind and the whole overworld map had opened up. Worst choke points were behind.

No more crawling through mud with a pointed stick. Time to run smoothly to the end with my overpowered NPC companions.

“So, can I call you Crys and Kimono now?”

Kimono clicked her tongue. I hope I'm not setting up a flag here.

---

After signing the preliminary party contract, Crys sent Kimono to fetch us food and drinks from the kitchen. The gathering of merchants was still going strong downstairs, but Crys had already lost interest; he ordered Kimono to tell his regular clients and patrons that their night appointments were canceled.

When Kimono opened the door and left, I saw one the manservants walking in the corridor and realized I had forgotten witnesses for the contract.

Yeah, the contract was even less binding now. Crys didn't care to remind me that his contract signings usually had at least two witnesses.

Oh well, what's done is done. It was just a formality anyway.

“How did you get into this gathering?” (Crys)

“Huh? Oh, I bought an invite from merchant named Gerany, from the red lights district.”

“I see. So, time traveler Speedrun, how will the war end?” (Crys)

Crys moved on his own pace, jumping from one sudden question to another sudden question.

“That's what you want to know? All right, let me go through the most important parts. In the relatively near future, the war situation here turns sour and you decide to move your business north.”

“As you previously said.” (Crys)

“Right, and few months or maybe half a year later from that, you would meet Rainwoman's group and the twin brothers Reavertooth and Ivorythief at Loönois moors. They are very important characters.”

“Rainwoman, Reavertooth, Ivorythief. All unknown names to me.” (Crys)

“Yes, they are not exactly active yet, but they will become very famous and very useful in the future. The twin brothers' real names are Krajannar and Bodhicoirn, the street names Ivorythief and Reavertooth will be their outlaw identities, given by Caliph Tze after they kill few of his knights and escape from Rukhkh. Rainwoman's real name is Sade, but she doesn't remember that name herself, so it's not important... well, it was important in the past, but it's not now, so, uh... how should I explain...”

“Names don't matter, tell me why these people are important.” (Crys)

“Yes, anyway, with Rainwoman's group and the twins, you start a gang that is first called The Resistance Gang of False War, and just like you hope, it quickly grows into this bigger faction called Revolution Movement. You then become the de facto leader of the third superpower in this world. Your home base is Starfish Mansion located in Loönois, or more specifically the wet moorland fields northeast from the city of Loönois. However, three-four years from now, Caliph Tze makes a surprise special attack against Suleiman and wins the war. He becomes the ruler of both continents and crowns himself the emperor of Mu-Ur. Revolution Movement attempts to assassinate him at his coronation, but fails. The world sinks into darkness... The end. And that's the short version of the bigger picture future history, as I remember it. The ending is what I want to– the ending needs to be changed.”

“That is quite a story. What is this place called Starfish Mansion?” (Crys)

“It's hard to explain briefly. It's a Strangers-made house with many doors to many places, kind of like a hidden dungeon that's bigger on the inside than outside, but it looks like a high class mansion house and not like a dungeon at all... anyway, the point is that it's a perfect secret base for us, and there's an airship we need for a big skip later–”

“Are you suggesting that we move to north to this hidden dungeon house after finding these two men named Self-Destruction Dance and Test Subject?” (Crys)

“No, I was just talking about the original timeline, since you asked... I think instead of waiting stuff to happen in the north in the future, we should break that sequence of events and contact everyone as soon as possible. I mean, before they become wanted outlaws, before their names become known by everyone in the underworld.”

“I see. What is your plan then?” (Crys)

“I was thinking of heading to Pier City next, then taking a ship to west coast of Mu, then traveling the Halaxy Desert route– oh, right, wait a moment, I'm a man who wears two belts.”

I took out the Belt of Measurement Cards and placed it on the table.

I'm a damn doofus. I should have removed my belt from the start.