LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 13
The infirmary had a slight sharp smell of alcohol for some reason.
Hyeji and I opened our eyes almost simultaneously, still groggy and confused about our situation.
Looking at my body, I found myself face down on the bed.
Damn, my back really hurt like hell.
I released the hand I was holding Hyeji’s with and stretched my sore body.
Hyeji was staring blankly at her left hand, still not fully awake.
Her eyes gradually lit up, and she started looking around like a startled cat.
“Ah? Ah? Ah! Ah!”
“Did you sleep well, Hyeji?”
But Hyeji didn’t have the time to respond to me; she pointed at me with a spaced-out expression and said, “Hey! You! Why were you holding my hand!!!”
“You asked me to hold it yesterday! Please don’t report me! I didn’t do anything!!”
“Huh?… Oh… Right. Right.”
That was close.
The protagonist almost got #metoo’d in Chapter 13.
Suddenly, this comedy novel is drifting off into a “But I didn’t do anything.”
No way.
Please, no.
I cleaned up the bed together with a now-conscious Hyeji.
Since no one was around, we left the infirmary and headed back to the dormitory.
Hyeji looked a bit stiff in her movements, but I ignored it.
‘Guess she’s still growing tall, just like she said.’
As soon as we returned to the dorm, I washed up and saw the books I borrowed earlier.
In that moment, I remembered the librarian nagging about the return date.
And then the realization hit me.
“Oh, I’m overdue. Shit.”
I decided to head to the library to pay the late fees and tried to take a nap afterward.
However, my hopes were crushed when an unknown number called.
“Who is this?”
– “This is Professor Miran.”
“What’s up?”
– “Kim Shinwoo, do you remember the job discrimination remarks you made during sparring yesterday?”
I racked my brain for memories.
The job discrimination was definitely me calling the Supporters tools.
“Didn’t we decide to let it slide?”
– “You’ll need to volunteer at the Academy today because of that, Shinwoo.”
“Isn’t that a bit unfair to a student who just came back from a serious fight?”
– “Come out quickly. If you keep this up, you’ll be in more trouble.”
Her voice was laced with personal emotion.
Just to test my suspicion, I blurted it out.
“Tell me honestly. Is it because of Jeong?”
– “Come out.”
‘Got it. Damn it.’
In the end, I spent my entire Saturday, which was supposed to be a rest day, doing volunteer work at the Academy.
Planting flowers. Cleaning bathrooms. Assisting in the cafeteria. Cleaning dorm hallways and stairs. Walking the dog.
You might think the last one is odd.
But what can I say?
The dog raised in the cafeteria has more seniority in the Academy than I do, so it’s the current reality.
At first, I didn’t even realize it was a dog.
“Pig?”
The dog was so fat that it was hard to distinguish from a pig.
From the barks it was making, it seemed like a dog, though.
As I dragged the dog along, meaningless thoughts started piling up.
‘In the military, military dogs have higher ranks than soldiers; do I have to salute every time I see one?’
Just for a moment, the dog walked a few steps and then collapsed from exhaustion.
And it looked at me with eyes asking to be carried.
Sure.
Not a chance, you little bastard.
I started dragging the dog, which didn’t want to come along.
Then it got up and started walking again.
Once we reached the cafeteria after the walk, the dog regained its energy and dashed ahead.
It immediately shoved its head into the food bin.
‘Is that a pig-dog or something?’
Anyway, the volunteer work was finally over.
I bought a lunch box and instant noodles at the convenience store to cover my meals.
While I was checking out, I saw lenses being sold behind the clerk.
Ah.
It’s happening.
As soon as I thought I needed them for tomorrow, I impulsively bought a pair.
Jeong Ahyeon.
You’re done for.
*
On Friday, I sent a simple message to Jeong Ahyeon via messenger.
[Green mini-skirt maid outfit. White stockings.]
[Sunday morning at 10:30 AM. In front of the cafeteria. Answer with “Haight!” and use honorifics.]
And then the day of reckoning came.
Around 10:30 AM on Sunday.
Jeong Ahyeon came in exactly as I described, wearing a green maid outfit with white stockings that had white frills on the sleeves and skirt.
She didn’t miss a single detail.
Seeing that, Hyeji and I went into the cafeteria, laughing more wickedly than ever.
We took a seat in a conspicuous place in the central area, where the other patrons could easily see us.
And we both stared at Jeong Ahyeon, who cautiously entered while holding the hem of her skirt.
“Cough! You little sinner!”
“Don’t worry. This is just the beginning.”
“Right. As Shinwoo said, this is where the real fun starts.”
Jeong Ahyeon held onto the skirt with one hand and pointed at Hyeji with the other.
“Did you also fall for Shinwoo, huh? Bewitching other men before your servant even!”
“I’m a girl too, you little bastard!”
“Shall we at least stick to honorifics first?”
“…. Yes, my lord. Please go ahead.”
A moment of silence.
Then I yelled with all my might.
“Hey! Waiter! One carbonara over here!”
“…… What?”
Jeong Ahyeon asked back with a look that said she couldn’t hear me.
“Did you not hear me, waiter? I’ll say it again. One carbonara here, please!”
“Shinwoo, will that suffice? Hey, waiter! One rose pasta and one steak, medium rare!”
“Stop it! Waiters don’t dress like this! And besides, who even goes so far as to ask that?”
“Ah, if you took the order, you should respond with ‘Haight!’ Isn’t lunch hour approaching?”
“…. Haight, damn it.”
Jeong Ahyeon gritted her teeth and went to place the order.
But shortly after, she returned to us with an even more deadpan expression.
“…. Since it’s pre-lunch hour right now, you must use that device over there to place your order.”
“Oh! What a bad luck in lunch hour, isn’t it? Hyeji, I’ll be right back.”
“Shinwoo, this is something for the waiter to handle. These experiences are what evolve a waiter to a head waiter.”
“Go!!!!! That word doesn’t even exist in this world!!!”
“Ah! That’s why the waiter can’t evolve. Hurry, use the kiosk to order.”
This time, Jeong Ahyeon stomped her foot and started using the kiosk to place her order.
Her eyes were bloodshot, and blood was dripping from her lips as she slammed the kiosk screen.
Then, she was scolded by a professor who secretly entered the student cafeteria to eat because the machine was broken.
Of course, the caught professor was dragged out without even finishing their meal.
Do professors come to the student cafeteria?
No conscience there.
We started eating the food Jeong Ahyeon brought back.
Of course, Jeong Ahyeon didn’t get a portion.
A waiter should work.
‘Did she bow her head earlier, or did she spit on my food?’
I couldn’t shake off my uneasy feelings.
At the same time, a mischievous thought about Jeong Ahyeon tampering with the food crossed my mind.
I looked at Jeong Ahyeon, who was eating, and asked.
“Waiter. Do you know martial arts?”
“Please, go ahead.”
“The fire in the Volcano Faction actually uses the character for fire (火).”
Jeong Ahyeon gritted her teeth again.
“I think you might be mistaken about that; the fire in the Volcano Faction is not…”
“And so the representative swordsmanship of the Plum Blossom Sword is ‘Fire Arrow.’”
“Enough!!!!!!!!!”
Jeong Ahyeon screamed, clutching her head.
Meanwhile, Hyeji, who was eating with her head down, clicked her tongue while looking at me.
“Shinwoo, can’t you keep up with the meta? Why are you still clinging to ancient swordsmanship?”
“Hyeji, will you tell me that?”
“After the emergency patch, ‘Fire Arrow’ got nerfed; instead, they say they use ‘Gamaehwa-hwa.’”
“As expected, with the spirit of the Fire Element Undine, it remains unaffected even after a nerf.”
“Don’t insult martial arts!!!!!!!!”
Jeong Ahyeon glared at Hyeji and me as if she’d kill us.
During that moment, we heard some murmuring from the table next to us.
It was Jeong Ahyeon’s sister.
She was pulling her hair in frustration, muttering with bloodshot eyes, just like Jeong Ahyeon.
“Undine is a water spirit, you dog bastards! Volcano means formal splendor with the character ‘Hwa (華).’”
Umm, nope.
Today, it’s the wind spirit Salamander and the water spirit Noum.
If you keep this up, I’ll show you the true power of the Volcano Faction!
I tapped Jeong Ahyeon’s shoulder, who was still in shock, to let her look at me.
And I handed her the lenses I bought yesterday.
The color of the lenses was red.
“Up to here should be enough. Great job. This is a gift for your hard work.”
“Phew… I’ll gratefully accept it since you called it a gift. But isn’t there only one?”
“Oh, you just need to wear this one. Try it on your left eye.”
“Got it.”
Jeong Ahyeon put the lens I gave her in her left eye.
At that moment, her right eye retained its original green color, while her left eye turned red.
Simultaneously, Jeong Ahyeon was still wearing green clothing.
Everything is perfect.
“What does this mean?”
“It’s merely a preparation to enter a kind of lesson.”
“A lesson?”
Jeong Ahyeon showed interest in the word ‘lesson.’
I calmly explained so as not to ruin anything.
“Once, a warrior fought with green in their right eye and fire and blood in their left eye, paying homage to them.”
“Oh! Is there really such a warrior?”
“Rather, that person has become more famous in modern times. Probably, almost no one hasn’t heard of them.”
“I’m lacking in knowledge for not even knowing something like this.”
I placed my hand on Jeong Ahyeon’s slightly gloomy shoulder.
“It’s fine. I only learned it recently too.”
“Thank you for consolation.”
“And more importantly, the martial arts and sword techniques that they presented still exist.”
“What are they?”
At that statement, Jeong Ahyeon’s eyes lit up, sticking to me eagerly.
I backed away slightly to maintain some distance.
“The Shiljang Kwonbeob and the Shiljang Geombeob.”
“It seems to have a profound meaning behind it.”
“Exactly. So when you perform this martial arts technique, your shout has to be different.”
“How should I do it?”
I couldn’t laugh.
I must not laugh.
I exercised superhuman patience to control my facial muscles and calmly voiced.
“It means repeating the 92 movements 92 times; we call it ‘Guigui (九二九二).’”
“Got it. Guigui!”
Suddenly, Jeong Ahyeon struck a martial arts pose and shouted her battle cry.
“Great job. However, you need to make the shout a bit louder, especially on the ‘Gu’ part.”
“Understood. I’ll keep that in mind.”
Jeong Ahyeon took a kung fu stance with a serious expression.
I looked away from Jeong Ahyeon’s gaze and continued.
“The Shiljang Geombeob is relatively the latest martial art compared to the Shiljang Kwonbeob.”
“Is it derived from it?”
“Exactly. The original is known as Kim Cut.”
“It sounds like a foreigner with a Korean surname?”
Jeong Ahyeon expressed doubt.
“Because they said their roots are Korean.”
“Got it. So where is that person now?”
“They naturalized in Korea and now use the name Kim Geun-tae.”
“I thought the line of martial arts had been cut off in Korea, but it seems to be revived.”
Jeong Ahyeon nodded, impressed, then straightened her expression.
“I’ll head right to the training center and start training. Thank you for teaching.”
“We might have fought, but it’s all done now, so we can put the anger behind us.”
“Thank you. I think I’ve been too petty to think like that.”
“Endings should be good. Anyway, do your best.”
I smiled a gentle smile at Jeong Ahyeon and extended my hand.
Jeong Ahyeon didn’t refuse and shook hands with me.
Then suddenly, Jeong Ahyeon looked like she remembered something and asked me.
“Ah, could you tell me the name of this warrior?”
“They are someone relatively recent and known worldwide.”
I averted my gaze from Jeong Ahyeon’s eager eyes.
If I looked directly at her, I’d definitely burst into laughter.
“So we called this person the Champion (CHAMPION).”
“I see.”
With my eyes closed, I whispered lowly.
“But this person didn’t want to stand above others, so they removed the letter ‘ON.’”
“To lower oneself, you mean? I still have a long way to go.”
“Thereupon, we refer to this person simply as Champi (CHAMPI).”
“Champi… What a wonderful ring to it.”
Jeong Ahyeon murmured that name several times.
Before leaving the cafeteria, she turned back to me.
“Thank you, Shinwoo. I’ve gained enlightenment thanks to you.”
“Sure. Let’s meet again next time when you’ve gotten stronger.”
“Got it. I’ll strive to follow the path of the Champi.”
“You worked hard today. Thank you.”
The moment Jeong Ahyeon completely left, a message popped up on my phone.
Tool [Hey, you crazy bastard! Are you packaging it like that?]
Me [Yo, shit? Is this working?]
Tool [How can a person’s name be Champi?]
Me [But where’d you run off to to text me?]
Hyeji [She got spooked that you were selling drugs.]
Hyeji [Guigui was so dank over there.]
Me [Honestly, it was a stretch, but it worked.]
Before long, Hyeji came up to me.
Judging by how her cheeks were still soaring, it seems like she made the right call in leaving.
If she hadn’t, she would have been caught already.
“Shinwoo, how long do you think this will hold?”
“Maybe about a week at most? That guy seems dumber than me.”
“If he finds out the truth, he’ll seriously come to kill you.”
“Don’t worry. If it comes down to it, you just have to fight again, and there’s no problem.”
Hyeji glared at me with her eyes sharp as daggers.
“I’m the Support, so it’s only right for me to say, ‘Do it!’”
“…There’s definitely an issue from the moment the Supporter is the one saying that, right?”
“Ah, shit.”
After that, there were no significant plans left.
Since I had no books anyway, I decided to test out Hyeji’s gear at the sparring ground with her.
After submitting the application and getting approval, I had one question while operating the sparring ground system.
“Hyeji, were you not able to create only weapons and armor originally?”
“Huh? Isn’t that right?”
“But during the last fight, how did that lump of metal come into being? That can’t be classified as a weapon, right?”
“Oh, I just thought I’d try it out…?”
Suddenly, Hyeji realized the unease.
Abruptly, Hyeji took out all the firearms available on the sparring ground to experiment.
Once she implemented a rifle, just like before, all the plastic parts were replaced with metal.
It was a bit different when I physically touched the firearm to check every nook and cranny and implemented the abilities.
Even the non-metal parts of the firearm got implemented too.
This time, Hyeji held the gun upside down, aiming the buttstock at the front, and started to implement the ability.
Soon, a small lump of steel appeared at the end of the buttstock.
“What’s this? What is it? No way, this works?”
“Hey, what the—Your ability is way off from what you said last time.”
“Wait! Wait! My ability changed a bit!”
“Damn it. Why am I the only one without abilities!”
“From today on, call me Hyeji-Mark 2.”
Compared to the ability I had used before, there had been several changes.
After some experiments, I organized the changed abilities as follows.
1) Touching the weapon directly, the non-metal parts can be implemented.
2) Knowing the structure of metals allows implementation, even if they aren’t classified as weapons or armor.
3) Due to an increase in magical power, there are no limitations on implementation frequency.
4) If a chemical weapon gets implemented, it can be used directly.
Although the duration remained the same, I didn’t care about that.
Hyeji was so thrilled that she bounced around expressing her joy.
“Oh my God! I can finally use a flamethrower properly!”
“I want a flamethrower too. I’ll be a fire-mage.”
“You’d fit better as a great demon-mage.”
“…That name feels like I’ll get restricted somehow.”
With a blissful expression, Hyeji stretched her hands toward the sky.
She looked just like what I used to see in the movie Joker.
“Anyway, thanks. Why did my ability suddenly evolve? I didn’t even think of it.”
“Damn it, stop with the rising excitement.”
Hyeji and I discussed our views to reach a conclusion.
Perhaps, getting pushed into extreme situations led to her ability leveling up; our conclusion was drawn.
‘She probably had a psychological element of letting out her feelings too.’
In this excited state, Hyeji was frantically touching and implementing weapons.
It was only natural for her to use her abilities more than the number I had noted on the application.
In the end, we appropriately submitted a written explanation.
“…I just watched, you know?”
“Just write it down, okay?”
Shit.
Eventually, I submitted the explanation.
I wrote, “I’m sorry for being an ability user” on the paper.
Hyeji, who had been grinning, treated me to dinner, and I requested on top of the menu for two additional meals without complaints.
So after parting with Hyeji, I returned to the dormitory.
‘I’m sure there will be a special use for this number I’m seeing.’
Knowing about regression and experiencing it are completely different.
In that sense, the rising count turned into a half-baked ability.
I could roughly guess what others were doing.
But it isn’t always possible to guess every time, hence it became an extreme guessing game.
Of course, just because I knew I had regressed doesn’t mean I could respond accordingly.
Damn it, I’m so envious of Hyeji.
No, I’m happy. I’m happy.
With that, I buried my face in the pillow and fell asleep.
The wet end isn’t from tears; it’s probably just drool.
Probably.
*
On Monday morning, I stepped into the classroom just in time for the start of the lesson.
But as soon as I poked my head in, a sudden roar from a lion welcomed me.
“You bastard!!! You deceived me!!! Champi? Champi? You bastard!!!”
Ah, right.
I got caught.