INSCRIPTED REALITIES

A lump caught in my throat as I choked out. ‘Y-you’re joking. This is a joke.’

He chuckled. ‘Well, I’m sure to you my life really might be a joke.’

This isn’t possible.

‘N-no way. Seong Daekhui is just the main character in my novel. He can’t be real.’

There was a loud thud followed by silence.

I banged my fist on the ground as the voice sounded. I stared down blankly, my mind racing.

What? Does he mean to imply that I’m just a character in his novel? That my life is fake? Fiction?! So what? All the shit I’ve been through, everything happened just because some pathetic piece of shit had a whim…just because he wrote…?

My lips trembled as I shakily turned back to look at them, my comrades standing behind me with tear-streaked faces, their shoulders slumped.

My eyes darted to the cave walls, the ceiling, the ground…I carefully patted the sand, feeling the small rocks brush against my finger. I took a deep breath, the scorched smell still lingering in the air.

He’s saying…this is all fake?

I looked at the ground before me, my chest aching as I stared at her ashes scattered, mixing with the dirt.

Did she die just because of that? Her sacrifice…only amounted to that much? Just for the sake of ] someone’s enjoyment, she had to die? Apparently, she wasn’t even real…

I felt nauseous as I stared at my trembling hands, tears streaming down my face. I watched as the droplets fell, spreading over the area.

How…how was that fake? Her voice, her laugh, her tears, her scent, every touch, everything about her…about all of us…How was that not real?!

I crawled toward her, what was left of her. My knees scraped against the rough ground and I felt a slight burn with each movement.

I extended my hand, fingers spread as I gently swept the grey ash toward me in a small pile. I stroked them, as drops fell in the pile. I chuckled.

I guess this is one way to become one.

I scooped up the remains, the grey dust slipping between my fingers as I brought it closer to my face and whispered.

‘I love you’.

I brought her close to my chest, crouching down as my head brushed against the ground.

I heard the chief’s voice. ‘I know…this is hard for you hero. However, we must quickly take away her ashes for processing.’

I frantically shook my head. He sighed and continued. ‘Hero, you know how valuable diamonds made from human remains are, especially those burnt alive from the flames of vengeance. After all…’

He paused. I mumbled. ‘After all, that’s the reason I was betrayed…the reason she died. Because their power can help us win the war and save this godforsaken world.’

Which isn’t even real.

I sat up, hearing the sound of heavy breathing in my head. I pursed my lips, clenching her remains in my fists and an arm backward. ‘This much should be enough for two…please let me, let me keep some.’

The chief sighed. ‘Making only two…is too risky. We’ll have to burn thousands for the same energy of one of these and if this fails…Please, hero, I beg you…’

I looked up, shutting my eyes, and nodded, extending the other fist. The chief came forward and took out a pouch from his robe’s pocket. He carefully collected the ash and swept it from each of my hands in the pouch.

He crouched down, scooping the fallen dust into a small piece of cloth, tying it with a long string, and handed it to me.

I looked up blankly.

Did he have some mercy on me?

He avoided my gaze and mumbled. ‘This…is needed to the spell when we activate the diamonds. You are the prophesied hero…so you have to do it.’

I took a deep breath, biting my lip till I tasted the blood. I looked up and said. ‘Hope you’re happy, you pathetic scum.’

The voice sounded with a choked sob. ‘Seong Daekhui, I’m sorry…I didn’t-’

I sneered between clenched teeth. ‘I will never forgive you.’

I flinched at his words, and my hands trembled. ‘I-I didn’t know, okay. If I did I-’

Is he actually real…?

He sharply cut me off. ‘What, you think that makes it any better? Just because you didn’t know? I went through all sorts of crap, lost everyone and everything I cared about…just because YOU didn’t know?!’

And he went through all that…I put him through all that…

I pursed my lips, and tears continued slipping out the corners of my eyes. My heart pounded as I clutched at my chest, my hand sliding toward my neck. A crushing weight seemed to suffocate me, as I curled my fingers around my throat.

I squeezed, choking out. ‘I…I’ll stop. I’ll stop writing.’

That’s what I should do.

For a moment, all I heard was the sound of labored breathing. He scoffed. ‘You’ll stop writing? Ha! Figures, since according to you the only reason I even exist is because you write! If you stop, what’ll become of me?! My world?! Everything I’ve been through, would it all be for nothing?!’

He’s right…there’s no guarantee…

The sound of his panting echoed in my head. ‘You may have decided when to start but you cannot stop just because you suddenly grew a conscience!’

But…

I clenched my fists. ‘But, I’m not writing now and your world seems to move along fine.’

He sighed. ‘So, based on that reasoning you’re prepared to risk my everything? What did I expect?’

In that case…there’s only one thing I can do.

My nails dug into my palm, as I took a deep breath. ‘Then…then, I won’t write any suffering for you anymore.’

I paused. ‘I’ll write…for everything to work out.’

Yeah! I can’t change the past but no need for the future to be just as miserable.

Nodding my head, I looked up and stared at the text on the screen. ‘I’ll write for you to be happy.’

There was silence on the other end for a few seconds, after which he carefully asked. ‘Really?’

‘Yes,’ I replied.

‘He gulped. ‘My lover?’

I nodded. ‘I’ll bring her back’.

He asked after a pause. ‘My friends and family?’

I jumped up, ‘Them too!’

He asked again, his voice getting louder. ‘My world?’

I’ll fix everything.

I leaned toward the screen, holding the monitor as my finger curled around both sides of the screen. ‘YES! Everything will go back to normal! I’ll write it that way!’

He asked, voice trembling. ‘Will you really do that…?’

I promise you…

I leaned closer, forehead touching the screen, hands shaking as I replied. ‘Yes, I promise! I’ll fix everything.’

And I promise myself.

He gasped, shakily replying. ‘Thank you. I still won’t forgive you for everything you’ve done but…for this, I am truly grateful.’

I will definitely fix this.

I closed my eyes. ‘Yes, even if I didn’t know…what I’ve done to you is unforgivable. This is all I can do for you to atone for my mistakes.’

Don’t worry anymore…

I paused, looking at the blinking cursor on the screen. ‘This is what I can and should do to make it right…and what you deserve.’

Because I’ll fix everything…

If only I knew that things weren’t that simple…maybe we wouldn’t have ended up this way.

You wouldn’t have ended up this way. I’m sorry, I will truly be forever sorry to you. If…if I knew we were nothing but puppets of this twisted predetermined fate with no chance of fixing anything, I wouldn’t have been so cruel as to give you false hope…only for it to be crushed.

If only you could…I’d tell you to blame me. But unfortunately, this fate isn’t so kind.

To be continued…