Chapter 38: Your Choice (1)
In the afternoon, I made my way to Adam Hyungs house for a chat.
For now, I set aside the task of soothing Ners boredom.
Theodore, who had gone on a subjugation, would be returning soon.
A few days later, Baran had also planned to venture out with other team members.
Unless there was a major request like the Blackwood case, we divided the Red Flames into smaller groups to tackle small requests.
Groups of fifty, ten, or sometimes just five members were dispatched to handle these requests.
Aside from the leader subjugation, there were also cases where small monster subjugation requests were made.
Moreover, the Red Flames members, thanks to rigorous training, could even manage if a leader monster happened to show up - there would be no serious complications.
Even when split like this, there was no problem.
This was possible due to Adam Hyungs ambition to make each member proficient in monster subjugation.
Because of this, the Red Flames was able to grow tremendously.
That was why we also decided to establish a base and settle down.
Captain.
I knocked and stepped into Adam Hyungs house.
Today, as always, he was sitting at his desk.
Ever since the formation of the Red Flames, he spent more time wielding a quill than a sword.
Sometimes, I found this a bit regrettable.
Of course, Adam Hyung still participated in the subjugation... but it was nothing like before.
Especially since we had such a great team dynamic, I felt his absence, regardless of how well Baran or the other squad leaders performed.
It was a mix of contradictory emotions - happiness that he was in a safer position, but also a sense of loss.
Youre here? But whats with the Captain? haha... Hyung greeted me with his usual warm smile.
I took my regular spot.
Next to me was a bottle of wine.
Today, like always, it was my job to chill Adam Hyungs drink.
- Pop
I uncorked the bottle and took a swig.
Hey, pour me one too.
Adam Hyung, who had been engrossed in paperwork since I arrived, finally spoke.
...
It was quite strange to hear such a request from him, who didnt usually drink early like me.
It seemed like he had a tough day today.
Without a word, I grabbed a wooden cup from the cabinet and poured him a drink.
Without lifting his gaze from his paperwork, Hyung took a sip.
Having a hard day?
I asked.
Adam Hyung nodded in response.
Cant seem to make decisions well today.
...Whats the matter?
He chuckled at me as I moved closer.
You cant read, can you?
Who said I will read? I told you to explain it to me.
Hyung, having diligently studied letters in our previous mercenary group, knew how to read and write.
I, on the other hand, didnt want to waste time on such things, hence I remained illiterate.
Looking back, he was right about that too
...Its not a leader monster. Seems like a corroded beast is roaming the Noxphel region. Already, six dwarves have died.
We could dispatch two or three members.
The reward is six swords. I was pondering whether to pay attention to such trivial issues.
I heard that a member from the Crian squad wants a break from his wife for a while. Seems like we could rope him in and a few others for the task.
Oh, is that so? We had a member like that?
Adam Hyung looked relieved, as if a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
I should have a talk with Crian.
- Swish swish
He swiftly jotted something down on the document before him and flipped to the next page.
Berg, you should consider learning to read as well. You have some free time now.
And there it was, the nagging had resumed.
Just as I was about to retort, Adam Hyung cut me off.
You could learn from your wife.
...
Theres no way Lady Blackwood doesnt know how to read.
And I, too, fell silent at that fact.
Learning to read on my own didnt suit me, so I initially decided not to pursue it.
But I thought it might be easier if Ner taught me.
Recently, I had begun to think that learning to read might not be such a bad idea.
Perhaps I could even take some load off Hyungs shoulders.
...Im Fine.
But in the end, I stuck to my initial response.
To be honest, it wasnt that I didnt want to learn. I just didnt want to make an empty promise to Hyung.
It might be inconvenient for Ner to teach me.
At that, Adam Hyung briefly smiled.
His attitude suggested that it didnt matter what my answer was.
Cheers.
Soon after, he raised his glass, proposing a toast.
I toasted his glass with my bottle.
- Ding
A clear sound resonated.
Take another wife.
At the sudden words from Adam Hyung, I froze on the spot.
...........
Only Adam Hyung, as if nothing had happened, continued to drink.
An awkward silence stretched on.
I slowly glanced at the bottle of wine.
...Upon closer inspection, it was an expensive one.
...Huh.
I snorted.
I didnt even answer.
As if I hadnt heard him, I returned to my seat and took a long swig of my drink.
Hey, listen. Im saying-
No.
I answered firmly.
I stared back into his eyes.
It had been a long time since I had this forcefully asserted my opinion against him.
...Why, arent you content with your married life?
He blurted out such a ludicrous remark.
I retorted.
How did you draw that conclusion? Isnt it obvious that Im refusing to take another wife because Im content with what I have now?
It was the same with your current wife. You didnt want to marry then either. But look at you now. Having another one might make you even happier-
-Ah. Enough.
I cut off Hyung before he could even finish his argument.
And staring at him, who was looking at me as if my decision was foolish, I said.
...Ner is from the werewolf tribe. What do you think she would feel if I took another wife?
And were humans. Its not uncommon to have multiple wives.
Thats not my concern. Does it make sense to take another wife when the honeymoon isnt even over? Were still working on getting closer...
Since I had been pretending to get along well with Ner in front of Hyung, I swallowed the worries I was about to voice.
The worry of how to get closer to Ner was something I couldnt share with him.
...Anyway, its settled. If marriage is so valuable, why dont you get married?
Didnt I tell you that I cant because Im a philanderer?
...Enough with the nonsense, I cant either, now. Because I have Ner.
I concluded.
Are you already so mindful of your wife?
-Thud
...
I forcefully placed the bottle of wine on the table.
A tense atmosphere enveloped Adam Hyung and me.
He and I exchanged glances for a long time.
...All right, fine.
With that, Hyung immediately dropped his argument and lightened the atmosphere.
Im sorry. Calm down.
...
I just wanted you to be happier with more women.
He also cracked a joke, clearly meant to smooth things over.
Havent I been with many women? Each has her own charm, so I hoped youd enjoy each day with various wives.
...
I understand if you dont like it. Well close this topic today.
I let out a sigh and got up from my seat.
Hearing his excuses, the frustration in my heart was relieved. I could feel that his intentions were good.
But I... the repulsion came first, and I couldnt help but express my feelings in such a way.
As I turned to leave Adam Hyungs house, his voice echoed from behind.
...Hey, you stone-hearted bastard.
...
Are you leaving without making amends?
We always had a habit of reconciling quickly.
It was a habit that we carried over from our previous mercenary group.
We never knew when our final moments would be, so we didnt want to hold onto any resentments.
At the sudden recall of our old habit, a hollow laugh slipped past my lips.
Seeing my laughter, Hyung also broke into a smile.
I sighed and admitted.
I could just never win against him.
...Take a break, Hyung.
Finally, as if he had unloaded a burden from his heart, he sighed and returned to his paperwork.
Just go home.
.
.
.
.
Even though Berg had said no... Adam couldnt take his eyes off the letter he received this time.
Celebrien.
He stared at the letter from that noble elven family.
***
As the days went by, Ners sighs grew more frequent.
Especially when Berg was away for training, she sighed almost as much as she breathed.
Haaa.
She felt suffocated, as if a heavy stone was placed on her chest.
The more she was confined at home, unable to go anywhere, the stronger her sense of suffocation became.
Occasionally, she would visit the forest behind Bergs house, but ever since she realized that it wasnt a place where she could enjoy her time alone, her visits had decreased.
At first, it was fun to interact with the human children, but later, she was dominated by the fear of making a mistake.
The overflowing energy of the childrens was too much for Ner to handle.
...No other forest could fill the void left by the one in the Blackwood territory.
Haaa.
There was another cause for her unease.
A fact that she had to acknowledge, even though she tried to dismiss it.
...She was enjoying her time with Berg.
She was slowly learning what it meant to have a friend.
Whenever something amusing came to her mind, she would think of Berg, and when she was bored, her thoughts would drift to him.
She found herself thinking of Berg when she wanted to eat something, when it was time to clean, and even when she needed to tidy up the bed.
Of course, it could be that he entered her mind as a result of her boredom.
Regardless, she only found herself laughing when Berg was around.
Even so, Ner was beginning to appreciate the presence of her first friend.
For the past two weeks, they had done everything together.
Eating, waking up, sleeping, cleaning, and wrapping up the day with chatter...
For Ner, who had never had a companion, it was only natural that she would experience new feelings.
It wasnt love, but it certainly was a warm feeling.
She even remembered the prank he had played a few days ago.
While she was sighing in secret, something flew and hit her head.
Upon inspection, she realized it was a corn-based snack, playfully tossed by Berg from behind.
Berg, with a chuckle, kept throwing the lightweight snack, and when Ner rose to retaliate, laughter broke out between them.
She understood that this was also Bergs considerate way of cheering her up.
He was trying to make her laugh rather than sigh.
Seeing Bergs efforts only made her appreciate him more.
She was slowly realizing how fortunate she was to have him as a partner in this political marriage.
...Haaa.
That was why she felt even more suffocated.
It seemed like she could not possibly betray him.
She couldnt stomach the idea of betraying such a kind person.
She couldnt abandon a friend who gifted her with such warmth.
Yet, she also didnt want to stay here either.
Aside from Berg, nothing else in this place suited her.
She was also scared.
Her grandmother had once told her that nobody could love her more than her destined partner. If she missed that person, she would deeply regret it.
Ner wasnt brave enough to disregard that warning and carry on.
She might be getting along well with Berg now, but given their different cultures, it was uncertain what conflicts could arise.
She wasnt naive enough to entrust her entire future to Berg, whom she had known for only a few weeks.
Ner knew for sure that she had to leave.
Perhaps, it might even be necessary to distance herself from Berg.
When Bergs pride in her dwindles, and when Blackwood pays the ransom, she might have to persuade him to let her go.
It might be better to start now so that she wouldnt have to betray him later.
...
Ner thought about the sight of Berg furrowing his brows fiercely.
That image elicited an uncomfortable, vague feeling.
Her ego writhed, not wanting to be disliked by her first kind friend.
...Haaa.
Ner sighed again.
She didnt know how to resolve her dilemma.
Ner looked outside.
It was evening, and the sun was almost hidden.
Berg still hadnt returned.
She suddenly realized that it had been a long time since she had looked at the moon.
It had been a while since she had spoken to the moon.
It was time for all the children to leave the forest and go home.
Perhaps now was the most appropriate time for her to wander the forest.
Ner rose from her seat, driven by that impulse.
Breathing in the fresh air and gazing at the moon, she hoped her stifling feelings might ease.
...
Suddenly, she remembered that Berg had always told her where he was going.
It was the human culture custom that made her feel confined.
Ner paused and pondered for a moment.
Should she stay here until Berg returned?
Even if she left a note, he wouldnt be able to read it.
...After much thought, Ner took a step forward.
He should understand that respecting each others freedom was part of the werewolfs culture.
Though it was late, she left the house intending to take a short break.
-Creak... thud
End of Chapter
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