Immanent Ascension

“Gandash did something?” Jad said.

Kashtiliash sniffed. “Figures.”

“You mean Xerk’s friend?” Teucer asked.

“Yeah, that fucker,” Enusat said. “They’re not friends anymore, though.”

We’re not? Xerxes thought.

“What exactly are you planning to do, though?” Jad asked.

Enusat leaned away from the boulder and started cracking his knuckles one by one. “Simple. We lure ‘im out ‘ere and then beat the shit out of ‘im!”

Jad and Kashtiliash exchanged a glance.

“I don’t think so,” Kashtiliash said.

“Yeah,” Teucer agreed. “You know the rules. Laying hands on an officer will get you in big trouble.”

“And we’d never get away with it,” Jad added. “Not on the campus. If we weren't on lockdown, maybe we could catch him outside. The bazaar has a lot of places you could get the jump on someone. As long as we had masks, he’d never be able to prove it was us.”

Teucer plopped down onto the grass. “Except, you are on lockdown. Unless Kash, Xerk, and I do it ourselves.”

“True.”

Having finished with his knuckles, Enusat started pacing. “You three can’t do it. I want to be there. I’ve got to be there. So the question is… what do we do? Like I said, I can’t just let this stand.”

“Look,” Xerxes said, “I know Gandash comes across kind of rough. But he’s not that bad.”

Enusat stopped walking and faced Xerxes, his hands clenched into fists at his side. “It’s easy to say that when you weren’t there. You should ‘ave seen the look on his face. Sneering so wide ‘is mouth almost fell off. And ‘e was encouraging Arwia and Ningal to laugh. Might as well ‘ave ordered them to do it.”

Xerxes had a hard time believing that, but he felt he had already said enough.

Jad stepped over and put his hand on Enusat’s shoulder. “We get it. The bastard deserves whatever’s coming to him. Xerk-man just meant that we need to be careful. Right?”

Jad looked at Xerxes, his gaze suddenly much harder than usual. His expression combined with his words made it obvious what he was really asking Xerxes.

Are you with him or with us?

Xerxes swallowed. “Yeah, that’s what I meant.”

Jad smiled. “Good.” He looked back at Enusat and squeezed his shoulder. “We’ll figure something out. Remember, we know what dorm he’s in. What if we get some of that ultra-hard plaster the workers use on the bath tiles in the restrooms? We could seal his door shut at night!”

Enusat immediately barked a laugh. “That would be great. I’d love to see ‘im all flustered showing up late to morning assembly.”

Jad stepped back and pulled his sword out of the ground. “Or we could spread some rumors. What if everyone hears a story about ol’ Randy Gandy at the Bronze Bull?”

“Bronze Bull?” Kashtiliash asked.

Jad grinned. “One of the male brothels over by Gula Bazaar.”

Enusat laughed harder, and even Kashtiliash chuckled. Xerxes made a show of joining in.

For the remaining hours of Restday, none of the Humusi Swordmasters spotted Gandash. And then a new week started with Firstday.

Xerxes hoped Enusat would forget about the embarrassing incident, but he didn’t. It didn’t help that Jad kept bringing it up. Xerxes thought about warning Gandash that they were planning something, but never seemed to find the right opportunity.

Gandy’s smart. He can deal with it.

Jad and Enusat went through with their plan of sealing Gandash’s dorm room door with plaster. After asking around, Enusat had learned the pattern of the guards’ nighttime patrols. When it got late enough, they didn’t patrol, and generally just maintained their posts at key intersections. Which meant that, as long as the prank was timed correctly, there was virtually no risk of being caught, or of the guards noticing the sealed door.

At the last minute, Xerxes decided he needed to warn Gandash.

About half an hour before lights out, he said, “I’m going to the facilities.”

Jad and Enusat were arguing about what would win in a fight, an Abhorrent spawn or a crocodile, and hardly paid any attention as he slipped out.

Around the corner, he found Gandash’s dorm room and knocked. There wasn’t any answer. He knocked again.

“Anybody there?”

Nothing.

He hurried to the library, but given the hour, it was almost completely empty. He went in anyway, checking some of the side alcoves and back tables that weren’t visible from the front. There was no sign of Gandash.

Circling around, he knocked on the dorm again. Nothing.

Where the hell are you, Gandy?

It had been about twenty minutes, and he knew he couldn’t stretch time any further.

Back at 372, Jad said, “I was worried you fell in.”

“Must have been the curry at lunch,” Xerxes replied as he climbed into his bunk.

There wasn’t any more time.

It’s just a dumb prank, he thought. Nobody’s going to get hurt.

The next morning, Gandash and his dormmates—all of them officers—were dramatically late to morning assembly.

As they burst out of the main entrance and ran toward their spot, Enusat loudly said, “The bookworms slept in!”

Gandash’s face was as red as a beet, and he was frowning so hard it looked like his lips might fall off. The other officers looked equally mortified. Laughter ensued, with further comments being thrown out by other random Seers.

It’s fine, nobody got hurt, Xerxes thought.

The latecomers fell into line, and then the High Archon asked for an explanation. When it came to light that their lateness was because of a prank, it led to quite a bit of laughter among the other students.

But then Archon Kingallu said, “I’m disappointed. We brought you here for learning. Training. Not idle buffoonery. Starting next week, I’ll start a new arrangement. Exemplary students will be recruited to form a nighttime crew to bolster the Unsighted patrols. Hopefully, this will ensure no further incidents occur. Any who are caught breaking curfew will be punished quickly and severely.”

The High Archon didn’t go into further detail, but it was easy to guess why they were adding student patrols. Unsighted guards were physically inferior to the Seers. As had been the case with Xerxes and Kashtiliash, they were easy to outrun if it came to a chase. Adding Seers to the night patrols would make it much more difficult for the students to sneak around.

Enusat didn’t seem to care. On the way to the classroom, he chortled endlessly. “Did you see the look on ‘is face?”

“Priceless,” Jad said.

Xerxes was just glad the incident had passed. Enusat felt justice had been served, and Gandash ended up looking silly for a few minutes. No harm, no foul.