Immaculate

2891 P.C., the twenty-seventh of Autumn, Hylicia’s Vale.

Antares stares, blinking, into the clear water of the river. A few stray leaves drift downstream, carried by a slow current, the earliest falls of the season. Later that season, the river would be choked in the mass of leaves, but not yet; now, it was still clear enough for Antares to see his reflection.

Antares frowns, a bit put off. Where his skin had been clear just a few months prior, little speckles of red and puffy skin had started to appear, contrasting with his otherwise monochromatic visage. Pawing at his face, the boy attracts the attention of Alunya, sitting nearby wringing his hair out to help dry it, having just finished a bath to wash up with his brother. “What is it, Ari?”

Antares shakes his head. “Nothing, Alunya, don’t worry about it. Let’s get back home.”

Alunya watches the older boy, who was acting oddly pensive, as they return home. Alunya watches Antares acting glum all the rest of the day, up through the family’s meager dinner and bedtime. He may have just been worn out, given it was the busy season, but it felt like more than that to Alunya. So, as Antares is brushing his teeth getting ready for bed, Alunya clings to his back, resting his head on his brother's shoulder and cocking his head to the side curiously.

“Are you alright, Ari? You seem sad.” Alunya notes, sympathetically. Antares spits out the gross-tasting, tanin-rich saliva that accumulates in his mouth while brushing his teeth with the customary filed twig brush.

“I’m fine. Just have some kind of… rash or something that won’t go away.” Antares grumbles, rubbing the breakout on his skin. Alunya peers at it somewhat curiously. Antares looks over at Alunya, sighing. Alunya never seemed to deal with things like this, his skin was as clear and soft as the day he was born.

“Hm… I don’t think I can help with that.” Alunya apologizes. “But maybe I can help cheer you up, at least!” He offers. Antares just stares at Alunya for a moment, before giggling lightly. His brother was always so earnest.

Alunya blinks at him in confusion, not knowing why Antares was laughing. But laughter was better than moping, so he counted that as a success. Sitting down on the bottom bunk of the bed, Alunya opens his arms for Antares. “C’mon, I’ll sleep here tonight! Hugs always make me feel better when I’m down, so they should help you too!” Alunya beams at Antares, expectantly.

Antares sighs in bemusement. His brother was so precious it was almost saccharine. Unable to refuse him, Antares sits down on the bed next to him, immediately being dragged down by a giggling and squirming Alunya, who messily throws the single blanket on top of the two of them, clinging tightly to Antares’s side. “You’re not allowed to be sad when I’m here!” Alunya announces, fiercely.

Antares shrugs, resigned to his fate, and smiles wryly staring up at the now-empty bunk above him. He knew from past experience that after Alunya eventually runs out of energy, he would stop the excessively tight hugs and transition into a more comfortable light cuddling position when it would be possible to actually sleep; Antares merely had to wait until Alunya grew tired.

[...]

Antares opens his eyes lazily. It was unusual for him to wake up before Alunya, who was snugly pressed up against his side. He’d been having a dream… What was it..?

But before he could remember, his attention was drawn by an uncomfortable wet spot in the bed. Antares flushes red with shame and shrieks in dismay. Alunya immediately perks up in a panic, looking over his older brother. “A-Ari! What’s wrong?”

Antares looks away, feeling the blush of fierce embarrassment reaching up to his ears as he tugs the blanket away from Alunya. “J-just stay there, I need to go wash this.” Antares states.

Alunya eyes the stain on the blanket and flops away from it onto his front, placing his head on top of the backs of his hands. It was good that Antares was taking it away from him, he didn’t want to touch that… It didn’t look like any urine Alunya had ever seen, and just looking at it he was worried he’d get a disease from touching it, it looked more like snot than anything. Was something wrong with his brother? Was he sick?

Alunya watches Antares with concern while he heads out the door. Though before Antares could leave the house, he is halted by Reia calling out to him. “What’s the commotion about?” Reia asks.

Antares clenches his jaw in humiliation and holds the blanket at some distance from himself, taking a deep breath. Staring down at his feet, he mumbles “I, um, think I wet the bed…”

Reia cranes her head over. “What? I couldn’t hear you. Stop mumbling and speak clearly.” She instructs authoritatively.

Antares takes another deep breath and shuts his eyes. “I think I wet the bed.” He announces with some difficulty through clenched teeth.

Reia takes the blanket from Antares, and frowns in clear discomfort. There was indeed a wet spot, but it was formed by a pallid, slimy fluid, not urine.

Reia places her hand to her head. She knew she’d have to have this conversation sometime, but wasn’t looking forward to it- The boys didn't have a father to explain these things to them, so it fell to her. “...You didn’t wet the bed, Antares. Get changed and come out to breakfast, I’ll get these washed. I’ll explain it to you and Alunya after we eat.” Reia informs Antares. It would be easier if she only had to have this conversation once.

Antares nods, staring down at the floor in shame. Reia reaches over and gently pats him on the head. “Don’t worry, Antares, it's nothing to be ashamed about. It's perfectly natural for a boy your age.”

Antares grimaces, looking at the stain out of the corner of his eye. She could say that, but if it was nothing to be ashamed of, then why did he still feel so humiliated? Seeing the gross, slimy texture of the stain on the blanket, Antares silently thanks Hylicia that he wasn’t the one who was going to have to clean it, and scurries to put on fresh, unsullied clothes.

[...]

Alunya leans back in his chair, his mind whirring with confusion. He- and Antares, sitting beside him- had just received a lecture from Reia on all manner of things; Where babies came from, the differences between girls and boys, why Antares’s skin was getting red marks all over, how their voice or gonads or body hair would change.

But there was one thing that stood out to Alunya the most. “But I love Ari lots and I don’t wanna do any of that to him.” Alunya protests, furrowing his brow. “I mean, we’re both boys, so I wouldn't be able to anyways, but even if I could I don't think I would.” Alunya continues, every word making Antares’s blush get fiercer.

“The love you’ll feel for a nice girl you meet outside your family is different. True love between a boy and a girl is alot stronger, you’ll understand when you’re older. You’re still young and inexperienced, just hold on. For now, just remember that you have to wait until you are married to a nice girl.” Reia chides gently.

“I don’t think so…” Alunya mumbles dubiously. Injecting slimy bodily fluids into someone else he loved… He got a mental image of blowing snot from his nose into Antares’s mouth, which almost made him gag. That was the closest equivalent he could think of. Growing up put all kinds of weird ideas in people's heads, he guessed.

I suppose that explains why all the adults smell so gross and look so ugly. Actually, could he think about that for a moment? If what she said was true, then the girls just had a hole in their body which started bleeding every month to facilitate having kids? Gross. Not that the men were much better…

“Adults are gross.” Alunya finally declares. “You’re gross too. Sorry mom, it's just the way it is.” Alunya states matter-of-factly, nodding his head sagely. Reia stares at him aghast, as if stunned.

“A-Alunya, don’t talk to me that way! Honestly, where did you learn to talk to your elders like that…” Reia huffs.

Antares is leaning back, still trying to wrap his mind around everything while Alunya and his mother bicker, conflict waging in his head. It’s good to be growing up. Maybe if I look more manly, I won’t get teased so much. Antares tells himself.

But… He thinks back to how Alunya had looked at Tavr, the look of unmitigated repulsion writ on his face. He didn’t want his brother to look at him that way. As much as he hated to admit it, he liked when his brother called him cute. He wanted to grow up and have other people take him more seriously, but, would he have to stop being ‘cute’ to do that?

He’d have to figure that out later, because his attention is called back to the conversation when he hears his name.

“...And Alunya, you have to stop sleeping with Antares. It’s not appropriate for a boy his age.” Reia was lecturing Alunya.

Alunya shrieks in dismay. “Whaaat! But that’s so unfair!” Alunya protests.

“No buts! If I catch you again, I won’t feed you that day.” Reia instructs harshly. Alunya puffs out one cheek, grumbling fiercely and crossing his arms sourly. But Reia simply turns to Antares. “Now, we should get to work.”

Alunya grumbles and pouts even fiercer, if that was even possible, but Reia places a hand on his shoulder. “You too. You’re old enough to work in the fields with your brother and I, now, and we’ll need the extra help to make up for lost time. And don’t you think of running off, I’ll be keeping my eye on you.”

Alunya jumps, surprised. He might have been excited on another day- getting to spend the whole day with Antares and see what he did all the time?- but he was a bit too grumpy right now. It had been a long time coming; His chores and responsibilities had been increased gradually over time, not just housekeeping but also further processing of food, like shucking and grinding up corn. But he hadn’t actually been put to work outside, even though Antares had been helping his mother with field work since he was seven.

But as it turns out, the work out in the fields was not much more interesting than the boring chores back at home. There wasn’t really even much opportunity to play, since Reia kept her eye on him the whole time. She was being a jerk today.

Having said that, the low-effort, repetitive tasks are good for thinking, which he had plenty to do today. Based on what Reia had said, Antares would keep changing more and more. Becoming more like the other men of the village. Alunya frowns at the thought as he digs through the dirt for potatoes. Would he lose his cute, amazing older brother? Would that mean he’d have to get married off and he wouldn’t see him anymore?

“I don’t want us to grow up…” Alunya murmurs to himself, slowing down a bit in his work. There was so much more to do, to learn, to explore. Doing it all alone just sounded so drab. Reia had tried to make all those gross changes sound ok by telling him it was just natural, but why did it being natural make it ok? Rotten meat was natural too, but it would still make him sick if he ate it.

That thought dragged on Alunya’s mind, and his first day in the fields was one only of solemn contemplation and introspection.