I’d Rather Live as a Villain

I’d Rather Live as a Villain – Episode 25

(How could it be unimpressive to my eyes only?)

“Let’s skip the wine, and once we’re back at the hotel, let’s not go out again and just have a beer inside.”

It was in the car on the way back to the hotel.

Just as the traffic signs for Malaga began to appear, the executive expressed a wish to enjoy one more drink in the Spanish night.

“Are you okay?”

“What’s there not to be okay about? I only had a glass of wine. Besides, Executive Yoon couldn’t even touch the wine because of driving.”

“No, I mean, aren’t you tired?”

After a whopping 16-hour flight.

As soon as we landed in Malaga, it was straight to Seville, to Shacromonte…

Even I, behind the wheel, was honestly too tired to adjust to the jet lag.

“Just one can each. I slept like a baby on the plane ride here. I’m starting to feel a bit relaxed now. Are you tired?”

“No, what time is it now? I’m perfectly fine.”

Spain, a place I insisted we come to.

Of course, I had to say I was fine, what else could I say…

I must have acted too naturally.

Executive Yoon, seemingly relieved, curled up one corner of his mouth and said,

“These past two months. Wow… we really just charged forward, didn’t we?”

Indeed.

Even when I think about it, the time seems to have passed in a blur.

“What time is the branch manager coming to the hotel tomorrow?”

“I told him to take his time. After lunch. Told the executive to sleep in for a change.”

“Figures.”

“We only need to move with the branch people until tomorrow. After checking out tomorrow, we’ll head to Jerez in the afternoon to tour the winery.”

“And then we’re off to Madrid?”

“Yes, I was thinking since there’s no need to see the branch manager’s face for three whole days, why not visit the Madrid branch while we’re meeting him tomorrow, would that be okay?”

Executive Yoon nodded happily and told me to go ahead.

“Go. Does it make sense to return to Korea without even taking a look at the branch, after coming all this way?”

“I’m also wondering if I’m just moving according to my own schedule too much.”

“Isn’t that why we came? I actually like it this way.”

It was past 8 PM, and outside, the sun hadn’t fully set yet.

Looking out the car window, Executive Yoon said,

“Sometimes, it’s not so bad to not make decisions, to just be buried and follow along like a tag-along in a game of tag.”

These last two months, how calculating he must have been.

Even having to calculate against me, and to have negotiated accordingly.

And how much must you have secretly fretted, maintaining a smile on the outside while steering the situation just as planned?

Even I took days to plan and move out of my rented apartment, but you had to orchestrate so much more…

Then it suddenly occurs to me.

Perhaps this has been the life of Executive Kang Moon-jung all along, not just these past two months.

Always having to make decisions that meet the expectations of her grandfather, her father, and bearing the responsibility for those decisions.

I can fully understand why the executive would want to just follow along for once, without doing anything.

“Executive Kang is not someone who gets overshadowed wherever she goes.”

“That’s why I want to try living like that for a while, even if it’s just during this short stay. I want to take a break too.”

“Yes! I’ll make sure you can focus on recharging your energy and clearing your mind during the rest of our schedule in Spain!”

“That tone.”

What tone?

Wasn’t it the tone I’ve always used?

“Maybe it’s time to be a bit more casual?”

I almost asked back, pretending not to hear, using the conversation style that Executive Kang detests.

“It’s not that I’m asking you to drop formalities completely. But outside the company, let’s drop the military tone, Danaka. Try not to use it. Like that day when I went down to Daejeon to meet Executive Yoon’s mother. The way Executive Yoon spoke to me made me quite uncomfortable in front of her.”

“Ah… Yes.”

“It would be too awkward for me to start speaking formally to Executive Yoon again. And it would be difficult for Executive Yoon to start speaking informally to me right away. Just find a balance. You know the feeling, right?”

“So, it’s okay to be more casual outside the company?”

“If you suddenly switch to neither informal nor formal, it will surprise me.”

“That’s what you mean?”

Executive Kang chuckles at the joke I made.

“Yes, I understand… no, let’s do that.”

“Executive Yoon, it’s quite awkward for you too, right?”

“Ha ha, yes, honestly, it is.”

“I feel a bit the same. But, we are actually the same age.”

“My birthday is four months earlier than yours.”

“Take it slow. There’s still plenty of time. Right now, Executive Yoon is the person I keep closest to me, but it’s tricky figuring out how to adjust the distance between us.”

She has always been truly honest with me.

I’ve always felt it.

Even now, it’s the same.

“I’m bound to reveal my true self in front of Executive Yoon more often in the future.”

It sounded like a firm resolution.

“My honest wish right now is that even if I do reveal my true self, it won’t change how Executive Yoon, who finds me difficult, sees me now.”

“…”

“That’s why I can’t bring myself to speak casually with Executive Yoon. If I allow that, I feel like I’ll become too dependent on him.”

“…Yes.”

“Am I asking too much of you, giving you such a difficult role?”

“A role worth 10 billion, but I should take on even more challenging roles, right? But, Executive.”

“Yes?”

I paused to gather my thoughts.

Trying to guess what the Executive is worried about, I cautiously began to speak.

“I’ve already revealed everything to you, haven’t I?”

“What?”

“The house where my mother lives in Pyeongchang-dong, the environment I live in, my background. Even the times when I first started as an executive assistant, not knowing what to do, fumbling around in Pyeongchang-dong, and getting scolded by Vice President Kang Young-jin…”

“…”

“That’s why I know how humiliating it is to have someone see your true self, to feel exposed. No matter what you show, I’ll pretend not to see. So, show that side to me, not to others. I’ll act as if I haven’t seen or heard anything. I’ll just continue as I have been.”

***

The luggage I had requested from the airport delivery service had arrived in the guest room.

After a shower, the Executive and I promised to have a beer in the living room and then entered our respective rooms, dragging our suitcases.

I realized I hadn’t bathed for over 30 hours.

It’s still the dead of night in Korea.

I was about to call President Min Byung-jin to report that I had stamped the renewal contract with the olive farm owners, but I sent an email instead.

The email was brief, stating that the renewal was successful and that I would report the details over the phone once I woke up.

After sending it, I took a shower.

The custody and parental rights of the second child are to be transferred to A upon divorce.

As I stood under the shower, washing my hair, the clause from the marriage contract I had made with the Executive suddenly came to mind.

Of course, the Executive had said it was nothing to worry about.

I had agreed, stamping the contract, but I had never forgotten that clause since the day I stamped it.

A contract known only to the Executive and me.

Even if Chairman Kang Ki-young had precisely instructed to settle that matter before marriage, was it really necessary to include that clause in the contract?

I began to wonder if the executive ever considered such a matter between us, even slightly.

The image of the executive, shyly yet brightly smiling as he danced to the flamenco rhythm I set at the Sacromonte’s Ant Hill Restaurant for the first time, flickered in my mind.

Perhaps it was seeing his unguarded smile there, one I had never seen before, that convinced me of the feelings I harbored.

I wanted to know the true intention behind the executive’s insistence on including that clause in the contract.

But no matter how much I thought about it, today didn’t seem like the right day to find out.

He had kept me close, yet the executive’s words about the ambiguity of our proximity lingered in my mind.

He must be tired today, too, and I wondered if there was any need to hastily seek out his true feelings through words.

Yes, as the executive said, there is plenty of time.

After finishing my shower, I went to the living room, only to find the executive already there.

“Is it okay for me to be dressed like this?”

He was in his pajamas.

For three years, commuting to Pyeongchang-dong, I had always seen the executive fully prepared for work, never like now, bare-faced and in pajamas.

So this is what he looks like.

A bare face without makeup.

There was no significant difference from his made-up face, yet the feeling was distinctly different.

Had I ever considered the executive to be elegant while serving him?

With the makeup gone, his eyes seemed kinder, and the person’s image had completely changed.

The warrior’s aura was gone, replaced by the calm and introverted true nature of Kang Moon-jung.

“After all, we’re going to live together in the same house, whether we see it now or later.”

“That’s why I came out dressed as I usually do at home.”

“But don’t you wear something like pajamas at home, Executive Yoon?”

“I haven’t worn pajamas since I was a child.”

I sleep in just my underwear.

Sometimes, I sleep wearing only underwear, without even a T-shirt.

“I guess I’ll have to buy some pajamas when I return to Korea. Come this way. You’re having beer, right?”

“Just one can.”

“I won’t have any. I thought I could have another drink until just before, but after the shower, I feel a bit drained.”

“Then go rest.”

“How can I do that?”

“What’s going on like this?”

“It’s our first night. Eeeek… Are you going to keep your eyes that wide open?”

It seems even the executive is feeling the awkwardness of this space.

Judging by the way he’s caught making such a chilly joke with an exaggerated expression.

“I saw you wanted a glass when I was having wine earlier. You held back because of driving, didn’t you? I can wait for you until you finish a can of beer. Have a refreshing one.”

While I was popping the beer can, the executive twisted open a bottle of water.

As if he wouldn’t just let me drink alone, he briefly touched his water bottle to my beer can before pulling away, and said,

“You’ve worked hard coming all this way with me.”

I definitely thought during my shower that today wasn’t the right time.

But with this one can of beer, there seems to be time until it’s emptied.

Until about half the beer was gone, we just nibbled on light topics as snacks.

Then, when the beer in the can had reduced by about half, I mustered up some courage.

“I have something I’m curious about.”

“Again, that tone.”

“You told me to be comfortable. Sometimes it’s Tanaka, sometimes it’s casual, I’ll do that.”

“Alright, if that’s comfortable for you, do as you please, Executive Yoon.”

“There’s a clause about the second generation in the contract.”

“…Yes.”

“You put that in there on purpose, didn’t you?”

The executive took a long time to answer, staying silent, then finally opened his mouth as if admitting,

“Yes. There was no such thing as a ‘just in case’ feeling. It was just something I thought a lot about and seemed necessary to include. But don’t worry. As I said before, that part is something Executive Yoon doesn’t need to feel burdened about at all.”

“I see…”

I nodded.

That was enough for me.

But the executive seemed to expect a different reaction, watching me with slightly anxious eyes.

As I tilted the beer can, he watched me gulp down the contents and hastily asked,

“Is that it?”

“What do you mean?”

“That’s it, ‘I see’? Is that all?”

“Yes.”

“How so?”

I didn’t want to step back from here.

That was my honest feeling.

I wanted to keep at least one foot in.

“It’s become clear now.”

“What has become clear?”

“How can someone who is attractive in the eyes of everyone in the world not appeal to me?”

“…”

The director’s eyes narrowed as he looked at me.

“What about you, Director?”

“How could I not acknowledge someone who has been recognized by my father and grandfather? If you think about it, that recognition, I didn’t know it would turn out like this, but anyway, I was the first to do it before my father and grandfather. How could I have included such a clause without that recognition?”

“So, there was no need to attach the term ‘method’ in the first place?”

“Perhaps I…”

My heart felt like it was going to burst.

I felt like I was going to make a mistake.

So I quickly drank the beer without taking a breath to empty the can.

“You must be tired, go inside and rest.”

“Already?”

“Wouldn’t that be better? I’ve been drinking now.”

“…”

“You said you didn’t want the way I am now, wary of you, to change.”

Crushing the empty beer can meaninglessly in my palm, I stood up.

“The conversation we had in the car earlier. Your bottom line, Director. I don’t know what that bottom line is, but make sure only I find out about it, never let anyone else know.”

“…”

“I also showed it only to you, Director. I’ll go in and rest first. Sleep well.”