LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 38: In Which I Stop Trying To Be A Good Person (For Now)
Zince kept on glancing up and sideways at me and smiling as we went towards her room together, which I found rather cute, that she was that excited to have someone she could squeeze a little. Sure, I was just being used for my body, but that was kind of nice sometimes.
She stopped outside her room, and held up a hand. "Give me a moment to clean up." And with that she disappeared into her room, and a little time passed. With her by my side, it didn't feel weird having an erection while wearing a dress, since I was vicariously excited for how very excited she was to use me, but now that I was alone, it felt a little awkward. I looked down at my breasts and gently stroked the curve of my thigh to remind myself I was a girl... and though I was happy for Zince to use my cock, I was also thinking I could get Sasha to change my cock to a pussy once... oh. Right, I still hadn't given her any of her magic back.
Waiting around for what felt like a while to do quick cleaning, my arousal started to die down a little, losing most of my erection as well, which made me a little more comfortable with this body.
Finally, Zince peeked her head out, and smiled up at me, tracing her fingers down along my arm, and I swallowed, my arousal coming back in force.
"Sorry, I just had... stuff that tends to turn people off everywhere," Zince said. She led me into her room, in which one corner was a wide but relatively flat pile of pillows of various kinds and blankets haphazardly here and there... I would've thought she'd been tidying that, but apparently it'd been ignored. Along the wall were shelves, mostly empty, although with a few small pieces of pottery and art here and there. There was a large... well, I assumed at first it was a curtain, but realized it was a blanket haphazardly put up there.
"Okay, so whatever you do, just don't look behind that blanket, and we should be good." She started to caress my chest as she guided me towards the pile of cushions, but my eyes kept on flickering back to the curtain as she lifted my dress up and off of me, raising my arms cooperatively, and started to wind her huge scaled body around my naked human one.
She glanced over to where I was looking, and took me by the chin and moved it to side to side slightly, making me shake my head, I belatedly realized. "Don't ask, please," she said, her well-enunciated voice slipping just a little as she got more emotional.
But my curiousity was piqued. "What's so bad about what's behind that curtain? I come from another world, it might not
"Why, do people from your world not have a taboo about skulls? Oh, fuck." She sighed, feeling me stiffen in her coils, and slowly unwound herself from me. "Yeah, it's skulls."
"A little bit of one, like, I'm trying to get past it, but also like, we just came here to do a slightly dangerous thing that you assure me won't hurt me, and also there's skulls everywhere... why so many skulls?"
"I keep skulls of everyone I killed, and everyone I cared about, so their spirits can watch over me."
"...that's pretty weird."
"It's a Kesara cultural custom. It reminds you not to get too attached to people, nor to kill too many people, or moving is a bitch. It's also good for necromancy." She glanced down between my legs and looked back up at my face, then handed me my dress back. "Look, I guess I killed the mood."
"You're a necromancer!? You... raise undead?"
She stared up at me blankly. "No, I divine the future by speaking to the dead. I don't think anyone can raise the dead besides themselves. That said, I'm not particularly good at divination, though... guess I would've seen this coming if I was." A self-deprecating smile.
"...oh. That's what necromancy used to mean back on my world, too, come to think about it, divination by means of the dead." I hesitated for a moment, but I guess she had kinda killed the mood. Also a lot of people, probably, given by how many empty spots there were on shelves and how long it took her to hide them. "...Ah. Yeah, um... I guess that was kind of a turnoff, sorry. Not trying to be disrespectful, just... I was trying not to think about murder and junk right now. We can try again some other time...?"
"...yeah, sure. Let me know if you're ever interested." There wasn't any hope or expectation in her voice as she turned away... probably, she thought I was just trying to be polite, and maybe I was, come to think of it.
I put my dress back on and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. "I still think you're very cute."
"Yeah, yeah." She gently pushed me towards the door, and, unsure what else to say, I left.
Since I couldn't stop thinking about it, and maybe Sasha had managed to do something, I returned to my room, and knocked on the door.
There was hurried but quiet talking for a moment, and then Sasha said, "Come in."
I opened the door, and stepped in, and saw Wren and Sasha in matching black dresses kneeling on the floor before me, both smiling up at me and wagging their tails slightly.
"Welcome back, Mistress!" they said in unison.
"Sorry I was such a mess when you came and rescued me," continued Wren, "Sasha has explained the situation. I'm happy to be your slave, and will serve you in any way you command." Her tail wagged a little more as she looked up at me desperately.
I stared for a long moment, not even knowing what to say. "...Sasha, can I have a word?"
Seeing this reaction, Wren's smile crumpled, and she looked down, ears slumping as she curled her tail around herself.
"Yes, Mistress." She rose, and I took her by the hand and lead her back out into the hall. She stared up at me. "...Mistress, I think I should let you know that you just undid a lot of the work I've been doing with Wren for the past few hours."
I glared down at her. "I thought you were fixing her, not making her into a slave!"
Sasha shrugged. "I already made her into a slave, and she's a blood hunt-verifiable animalfolk now. Slavery will be the rest of her life until we end it. What I was doing was making her stable about her position and her place with us as a first step, so she could build off of that into other forms of stability. Plus it's wildly unrealistic to expect me to undo all the conditioning I did to her in a couple of hours without any mind magic."
"...Fuck, Sasha... no, stop taking your dress off, I don't mean that literally... and don't give me the puppy eyes...."
Her eyes were tearing up just a little. "But I handed you control back and gave you the body, and you're just angry with me and don't want to fuck me."
"You don't want to fuck me unless you're in charge, if I remember correctly."
"Well, I mean... I do want to fuck you. I'd have to fantasize for it, but it would be a reaffirmation of our bond." She pressed her soft smaller body close against me, looking up at me with those big eyes of her. "Do you hate me now, Mistress?"
Now I was a little aroused again, along with angry. I was thinking about hurting her like I did Valentine, but that was a really bad idea, since this body was way too powerful if I got carried away, and it could hurt my and Sasha's relationship further regardless. "I don't hate you, I'm just... frustrated and confused and I don't know what to do to help Wren."
"Simple: Walk back in there, tell her she belongs to you, and then fuck her."
"That... feels a lot like rape."
Sasha rolled her eyes. "She needs to be reassured that you value her somehow right now, if you're going to keep her. Being useless to your owner is one of the scariest things possible for a slave. It would've been kinder to beat her up and tell her that was why you got her, so you could torment her, than leave her uncertain of her future like that."
"I... I'm pretty sure what you're saying is super wrong, but I don't really have any better ideas of how to handle Wren.... fine. You can cast magic however you want, whenever you want, forever."
She blinked, staring up at me. "...really?"
"Yes."
"...you should probably put a caveat in there to not let me use mind magic on you, or else I'll be tempted to switch us and you'll hate me even more."
"No, I... I don't want this sort of responsibility. You take this body, go figure out things with Wren, and then give it back to me when I ask-- I need to talk to Princess Adeline when we meet with her, I don't think you'd be good at it."
She smiled slightly, her entire air changing. "...All right. Let's lie down and get you to sleep, Sasha, it's very disorienting being swapped awake." She took my hand and lead me back to the bed, and I lay down on it, and almost instantly felt very sleepy, if in a comfortable way.
"We'll be with you in a moment, Wren. I'm just getting us back to our proper bodies." I closed my eyes for just a moment....
...I woke up, back in the body I had gotten more used to. It was kind of a relief. Eve was sitting on the bed, Wren in her lap with a tear-stained face and a big smile as Eve stroked her back. Eve smiled down at me. "I knew you'd come to your senses."
"...yeah." I got up and started to walk towards the door, and Eve's voice became a bit more stern. "Where do you think you're going?"
"Just... I need some time alone."
"And what do you call me?"
I looked back at her, annoyed. "...I thought we were sort of acting like equals."
Eve shook her head firmly. "You handed the power and responsibility back to me, and it's my responsibility to keep you happy. I'm not going to have you get jealous and sulk. Come back and get on the bed with us." She patted the bed next to her, and I stared down at her uncertainly for a moment. Now that I had given her that power, she could do basically whatever she wanted. But still, I hesitated.
"Do you want to be treated like a good girl or a bad girl?" That cruel smile played across her face, and I realized she was already thinking of ways to torture me. "...why are you still like this when I gave you the power back?"
"Why were you treating me like shit when I gave you the power back and brought Wren back?"
"I... wasn't trying to."
She shrugged slightly, smile widening. "Unlike you were when you were Mistress, I'm trying to take good care of your feelings. So unless you've decided you want to be treated like a bad girl...."
I came back and sat next to her. Wren looked between the two of us, a bit confused.
I looked up at Eve for a long moment. "If I ask for the body, will you give it back, Mistress?"
"You can have it back right now if you want, but then this is your situation to deal with."
I thought about that for a long moment, glancing down at Wren. "...are you really okay with this?"
Wren stared up at me. "...why are you not? Mistress has promised to take very good care of us as along as we're utterly obedient to her... and... the idea of serving Mistress makes me feel good...."
"That's probably just conditioning," I answered her. I didn't know about feeling good, but it was at least making me feel horny.
Mistress smiled, sliding her hands between each of our legs and rubbing softly. "Everything you've learned as you grew up and lived your life is just conditioning, that doesn't make any of it less real." That was a terrifying worldview, but i was quickly distracted by Mistress's next words: "Now why don't you kneel on the floor, my cute pets, and give me a nice double blowjob?"
In a moment, Wren was kneeling on the floor in front of her, tail wagging as she got her head patted, and after a moment, I sunk down on my knees next to her, and got my head patted too... oh, and earscritches... no one knew the exact right spot like Mistress did... my tail was wagging frenetically now.
I liked being dominated sexually, and I really didn't know what to do in this world to be a good person. Even if it was just for a little while, everything was so much easier if I just forgot about the complex stuff and blindly believed in Mistress.