LIGHTNOVELONLINE Chapter 269
The handover happened quickly.
It was a process to pass on everything I knew.
However, I was able to keep the fact that I was the author of this novel and that I had embodied into this world to myself.
I thought it might be okay to say it soon, but strangely, the words wouldn’t come out.
When I revealed it to Julia, it just flowed out easily.
It was strange.
I had about five days of lifespan left.
I had to hurry.
No one seemed to question my handover; everyone quietly took notes of the information I provided while preparing for the world after my death.
But not everyone was convinced.
“Why has you been acting like this lately, big brother?”
“What do you mean?”
“What are you planning by telling me everything?”
“We have to win.”
“What’s the point if you’re alive and know it? If so, you don’t need to tell me! But why do you keep acting like someone who is going to die soon…?
Emilia entered the room, clutching her skirt tightly and shedding tears.
Those transparent tears dripped down, soaking the floor.
As I tried to get up in surprise, Emilia rushed to me and hugged me tightly.
It hurt.
My chest hurt so much.
“You’re going to live, right, big brother…? They’re finding a heart that’s just right for you. Right? The Emperor and Erica are searching all over the country, trying to find something similar to your heart data among the vegetative state patients or death row inmates.”
“I hope they find one.”
“Don’t talk like they won’t find it. They will find it. They will definitely find it.”
“I didn’t say they wouldn’t.”
“I can tell from your tone… You’re not expecting anything. I can see it…”
I had nothing to say.
It was all true.
A heart that’s suitable for me.
There’s no way such a thing would appear.
Even if they searched the entire country, it would be a miracle if they found one, and if they limited their search to death row inmates or vegetative patients, there’s no way it would come up.
Besides, they couldn’t just examine all the healthy citizens to save one enemy.
Who would serve a country that would cut open its citizens to save one?
No one would pledge loyalty to such a country.
“There has to be a way, big brother. Please don’t let go of the thread of hope.”
“Emilia.”
“Stop acting like you’re already dead… I can’t handle that kind of big brother, really.”
“Emilia. Can you look at my face?”
“Why…?”
“I love you.”
“……”
A word that bubbled up from deep inside my heart.
Emilia’s face began to twist again upon hearing those words.
She was weeping and shaking her head without being able to speak.
I know how hard it is to let go of a lover first.
Now, I was the one inflicting that pain on Emilia.
Knowing how painful it was made me even more sorry.
“I truly love you. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t have made it this far…”
“Don’t say such things… Seriously, don’t say such things!!!”
“Are you not going to answer?”
“I won’t. I’ll only answer after you’re all better. So live until then.”
“Don’t be stubborn in strange places. Don’t regret it later.”
“Ugh… Why… why do you keep saying such scary things…?
Since Emilia insisted on hugging me, I held her shoulders and stopped her.
I wiped the tears from her face to prevent her from mumbling through her tears.
After Emilia calmed down a bit, she pressed her forehead against mine and looked into my eyes.
Then she parted her trembling lips.
“I love you… I too love you… I will love only you forever…”
“Don’t worry. It fades away quickly.”
“Stop saying such things!”
“Got it. Sorry. Aah! It hurts! I’m sorry!”
Emilia’s fist pounding on me almost took my breath away.
I accepted Emilia who climbed on top of me and wrapped her arms around me.
And then I savored her body temperature for a long time.
I heard her sniffing sounds.
I enjoyed the warmth of life.
Everything felt like it could be the last.
*
-Schlus Hainkel during his illness
– Schlus Hainkel attacked by a Majin in the Development Area
– Is the war with the Majin already underway?
No matter where I looked, it was all similar articles.
Schlus Hainkel was attacked, and the story only mentioned that he was not seen outside at all.
However, everyone seemed to regard Schlus merely as a volatile material, making Trie nervously crumple the newspaper.
“Ugh, this is annoying…”
Schlus was bedridden.
And what was more, it said he’d die within a week.
It was obvious who was to blame for that.
“It’s my fault. It’s my fault. It’s my fault…”
Sending back the capable combatant Hertlocker was probably the reason.
If Hertlocker had been there, Schlus might not have been attacked in the first place.
So this was all my fault for selfishly excluding Hertlocker out of jealousy.
I killed Schlus.
Trie believed that without a doubt.
“Haah…”
Again.
It came again.
Standing in front of the Chairwoman’s Residence at the Imperial University, Trie sighed deeply.
Even though she had stood in front of the main gate several times, she still couldn’t bring herself to knock.
She couldn’t face Schlus.
She was afraid he would blame me for what happened to him because of me…
Of course, she knew Schlus wouldn’t act that way.
She understood it in her mind, but her heart wouldn’t follow.
Even when she summoned her courage and reached out, her heart raced violently, her breath got ragged, and she felt dizzy.
She couldn’t see Schlus.
Just seeing his face would make her go mad with guilt.
Making excuses, Trie turned her back once again today.
“Ah.”
“Trie? Are you on your way out after seeing Schlus?”
“Oh, um, well…”
It was Iris.
A person she hadn’t seen often lately.
If she wandered around, she could see Aintz or Hertlocker coming and going almost every day, but Trie didn’t recall seeing Iris apart from when Schlus was supposed to wake up.
Erica seemed to be busy finding a heart…
Was Iris too busy looking for a way to save Schlus?
“No… I really couldn’t bear to see him. Haha. Can you deliver my regards?”
“Deliver them directly, Trie.”
“I can’t…”
Trie unintentionally raised her voice.
Seeing Iris’s smile falter slightly made Trie feel a pang in her chest.
“Go in alone…”
“Today could be the last day, Trie.”
“You say you can see the future. Is today the day Schlus will die?”
“No, it’s tomorrow.”
“……”
Trie’s mouth fell open.
Schlus would die tomorrow.
That’s what the saintess who claimed to see the future said.
“That’s right. Just as Trie said, I can see the future. I see dozens of futures every day. In them, I’ve seen countless people die. But even after seeing the future, there are so many people who I couldn’t save. Isn’t it funny? With such powerful ability, I’m still powerless. But I absolutely refuse to give in to powerlessness. Do you know why?”
“……”
“Self-hatred produces nothing. If you don’t want to regret it, then let’s go in together, Trie.”
“Okay…”
Iris’s delicate, beautiful white hand.
Trie stared at it for a moment before gently grabbing it.
Then they headed toward the main gate together.
*
I’d rather want to die quickly.
Suddenly, that thought crossed my mind.
It would have been better if I suddenly died instead of dragging on like this.
Because I was mentally sharp, there were countless issues that needed to be resolved before I died.
Among them, the most troublesome was the engagement.
To be precise, engagements.
“Let’s sort this all out. I haven’t made any announcements yet.”
That’s what I conveyed.
Let’s declare them all null and void.
No matter how much I thought about it, announcing my engagement to Emilia and Iris and then just suddenly dying would be a terrible mistake.
I had no territory, family, or successor.
If I die without leaving anything or anyone behind, marrying someone like Emilia or Iris would mean nothing for them.
If I turn both of them into widows in an instant, it’s much better to just cancel the engagements.
For their future, that was the better decision.
“What’s wrong, big brother? Really, why are you doing this? Are you trying to make me hate you before you die? Are you trying to make me with someone else?”
“……”
“Even if you’re trying to, it would fail, big brother. Even if I hate you, there’s no way I could not love you. You really are a terrible man…”
“……”
Of course, I had to endure plenty of scolding.
It hurt my heart, but it was bearable.
I couldn’t sacrifice their futures just for my fleeting satisfaction.
Right now, it might seem like I’ll love only the dead lover for a lifetime, but as time goes by and the wounds heal, I might change my thoughts.
Just like I had.
“I… I will be outside…”
“Trie.”
“I’m sorry, attendant… I shouldn’t have brought that up…”
“No, it’s okay, Trie!”
Unintentionally, Trie’s confession also became vague.
I wanted to respond to that feeling.
I knew how difficult it was to bring up those words.
If Emilia and Iris permitted it, I wanted to accept Trie as well.
However, it was unreasonable to bring that up while canceling the existing engagements.
“Wait a moment, Trie!”
“……”
Trie ran out of the room, and Emilia followed behind her.
A *thud* echoed as the door closed.
Only Iris and I were left, filling the room with an awkward silence.
“Have you been seeing the future lately?”
“……”
Iris shook her head slowly.
Then she approached the bedside timidly.
“I can’t see anything at all. On the surface, they say I’ve been seeing a future where Schlus dies and where we win the war against the Majin… but the truth is, I can’t see anything these days.”
“That’s good.”
“Why is that a good thing? If I can’t see the future—”
“It’s easier for you.”
“……”
The saintess who sees the future.
Only a few understood her, but she was a hidden hero, silently looking into countless cruel futures and working tirelessly to change them.
That was Iris.
But if she couldn’t see the future anymore, that would mean she could finally rest.
No, she had no choice but to rest.
Perhaps it was time for Iris, who had dedicated so much, to take a break.
“Maybe you’re right. Um… Well, saintess, I think I should quit.”
“I wasn’t saying that.”
“I’ve decided. I’m quitting.”
Iris gradually leaned closer and climbed onto the bed with a creak.
She sat on top of me after getting on the bed.
Iris got closer to my face, and I panicked greatly.
I could feel my blood rushing.
But the performance of my lowly artificial heart couldn’t keep up, making my chest feel stuffy.
“I told you earlier. I’m quitting being the saintess.”
“Right.”
“And the engagements have been annulled. All of them.”
“Oh… That’s right.”
“If that’s the case, then it’s not fornication, right?”
Iris grabbed my wrist and slowly lifted it.
The soft feel of her breast above the fabric tickled my fingers.
As her fingers dug deep into that destructive scenery, I felt like I might lose my breath.
“Before I go, I want to have your child…”
Iris’s beautiful eyes sparkled.
They seemed like they were on the verge of overflowing with tears.
I slowly wrapped my arms around Iris’s waist and accepted her approaching lips.
…
…
…
*Huff…*
Lichtenburg Mansion.
In the spacious room that had turned into a laboratory, Erica sighed deeply.
Reports that had arrived from the palace were piled up in one place.
It was just a simple task of cross-referencing data, so it didn’t take too long.
Within three hours, she had managed to investigate all the data that had arrived today.
The result was—
“There’s nothing… Nothing at all…”
It was a failure.
There was no heart that matched Schlus’s.
The highest compatibility was only 23 percent.
At least 70 percent compatibility was needed for the survival rate to barely exceed 1 percent after surgery, but at this level, it was impossible.
*Chomp…*
The sound of her biting her nails echoed hollowly.
She wondered whether the method itself might be the problem.
Searching among vegetative patients or death row inmates wouldn’t yield a heart with high compatibility.
What if they conducted a nationwide survey and sacrificed innocent people…
“No…”
She had reached a dangerous line of thought.
Such a thing would be against Schlus’s wishes.
He would refuse until the end.
But what if…
What if the perfect heart appeared, and Schlus, not wanting to kill an innocent person, refused it; what should she do then?
Schlus could neither use magic nor internal circuits now.
It would be easy to subdue him.
If so, would it be right to forcibly carry out the surgery?
“Aahh… I’m going insane.”
That would, of course, have to be a last resort.
Moreover, this was only in the event that a heart with high compatibility appeared.
It was still too early to mention anything.
*Knock…*
“Who… Ah, Julia? What brings you here?”
“Sister.”
At that moment, the door opened from behind, and Julia appeared in her wheelchair.
Erica, forgetting her fatigue, smiled.
However, there was a slight awkwardness in that smile that hadn’t existed before.
Julia had been reincarnating non-stop for hundreds of years.
Knowing that fact, it was hard to treat her completely the same as before.
“Sorry, can you go out for a moment?”
“Of course, miss.”
“Julia. What’s wrong?”
“…”
Julia pushed her wheelchair and sent the maid out, closing the door with a *thud.*
Was it a matter meant only for the two of them?
But what kind of conversation could be so secretive that even the maid couldn’t hear…?
Erica felt tense as she looked at Julia’s serious face.